35 Things You’d Never Think To Be Offended By Until Someone Else Was
Interview With ExpertEmotions are powerful. So powerful, in fact, that they can feel like irrefutable facts and consume our entire being, blinding us to other perspectives. Even when they're more reasonable than ours.
Recently, Reddit user Mlkrs_maria posted a question on the platform asking others what the dumbest reason someone got mad at them was, and people immediately started sending in their replies.
From texting the wrong word to merely minding your own business, continue scrolling to check out the ones that got the most attention, and don't miss the chat we had with psychologist Dr. John A. Johnson. You will find it in between the stories!
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My ex gf from college got mad at me and didn’t speak to me for 48 hours. Why? Because she texted me asking if she could borrow my charger and I said “Sure” instead of “yes”. Apparently it’s rude to say “sure”.
When we broke up she texted me asking if I was happy leaving her. I texted back “sure”. It’s been 15 years and it still makes me laugh.
When working at Walmart someone’s total came out to $6.66. I guess they were superstitious. They told me to change it by a penny up or down, but I couldn’t without them purchasing something.
I found stickers for $0.05 or clearance tackle for $0.10, but they didn’t want to buy anything. They just wanted me to change it by a penny. I told them it wasn’t something I could do, and I wasn’t going to charge them for something they didn’t purchase. I offered to split the order, but the didn’t want to carry two receipts. I told them they could just not take one of the receipts and they b***hed about that too.
They. Threw. A. Fit. They tossed all their s**t on the counter, started yelling at me, and ultimately left without buying anything. Wasted their own time, and breath for absolutely nothing other than a stupid anecdote I get to tell occasionally.
How to get to heaven, lesson 256: Be abusive to others over a random number.
"Our mood or emotional state definitely has an impact on our perception," Dr. John A. Johnson, professor emeritus of psychology at Penn State University, told Bored Panda.
"Some people are more-or-less continuously high-strung, so they react negatively to many situations, including those that most of us would regard as trivial. But even people who are normally pretty levelheaded can become over-reactive if they haven't had enough good sleep lately, haven't been eating well, or have been under a lot of stress."
When I was 14 my mother thought her 45-ish year old boyfriend was "having an affair" with me, kicked in my bedroom door(which had no lock) and tore into me calling me a s**t. I was still virgin and VERY obviously hated her douchebag boyfriend. I left that night with a garbage bag of my clothing/possessions.
Had a houseguest who used my toothbrush then got mad when she got a cold sore. I understand being upset, but the blame is clear.
According to Kandi Wiens, who is a senior fellow at the University of Pennsylvania Graduate School of Education and the author of the book Burnout Immunity, not only is the sheer number of people experiencing burnout higher than ever, but recent evidence shows that burnout is affecting workers at younger ages—and its effects are more debilitating.
Indeed, the 2023 Stress in America survey revealed that 67% of adults ages 18 to 34 say stress makes it difficult for them to focus, 58% describe their daily stress as "completely overwhelming," and nearly half report that most days their stress is so bad they’re unable to function. No wonder so many of us are overreacting during casual interactions.
I love telling this story.
I worked retail for 8+ years, so I've got stories. This one particular day, we were kind of dead. I was stuck at the service desk and this nice little old man came in and shuffled up to the counter. I smiled and greeted him, he returned the smile and explained to me that he wanted the information on one of the sofas we were selling at the time. His wife was stuck at home and he wanted the dimensions, the fabric type, etc.
So, I grabbed some receipt paper and a pen. I walked over to the sofa he was interested in and began writing the information. He stiffened and let out an audible "OH..." I apologized and asked if I had done something wrong... he goes, "you're left handed... you... are a *COMMUNIST*!"
He then shuffled his elderly butt back out the door and across the parking lot. While I stood there just like 😶...
I never got angry with him, but it was incredibly hilarious and out of left field.
Once someone got mad at me for politely holding the door open for them. Apparently, it made them feel 'rushed.' Can't win!
A coworker got super pissed I didn't comment on her coloring her hair a few shades lighter. Sorry, not that interested in your hair lady.
"Also, people might be harboring anger over some past issue, and the 'dumb reasons' are not the real reason the person blows up," Dr. Johnson explained to us.
"If someone overreacts, I might want to ask them if there are other things going on in their lives that are stressing them out, or if there's something I've done recently that upset them that they would like to talk about."
I used to work security at a high-end condo a long time ago.
Someone on the top floor called about a possible intruder on their roof-terrace-area-thing. So I immediately went up to the roof to investigate.
Lady complained that I entered her property without permission.
Lady, *you* called *me* for assistance. If you don't *want* my assistance, I'll go grab a Coke. I'm thirsty.
I got written up in school once for gagging bc a girl threw up right next to me and I reflexively gagged back. Said I was making fun of her.
Walking along with boyfriend (now husband), I can't even remember the context but I jokingly called him ugly, he hit me with an equally jokey "nuh uh YOU'RE ugly" and we continued this childish back and forth for about a minute until a stranger overheard us and then got mad that we were being "so abusive to each other", even though we were clearly joking and laughing.
Dr. Johnson acknowledges that remaining thoughtful in these situations is often easier said than done "because when we feel that we've been judged unfairly, we might not feel like dealing with the person at all."
But it's important to at least try. "If the person is important to us and is someone we spend a lot of time with, we have to get over our resentment at their apparently irrational judgment and try to have a calming conversation with them."
I was very sick with some kind of stomach thing, and had been taking the smelliest s**ts of my life. My girlfriend at the time wanted to come over, but I told her no, I was sick. She came over anyways, and the second she walked in, she said "oh, I have to pee, be right back". She walked right into a bathroom I just obliterated two minutes prior, then got mad at me because it stunk so bad. Like legitimately mad, then stormed out.
Dump her dumbass. She ignored your warnings and blamed you for her ignorance. Not worth your time or love because imagine you warn her of a possible gas leak in the house and not to come but she ignores you, comes anyway, gets blown up and comes back to haunt you just to blame you for her mistake
Had a date get upset and walk out on me because my blouse had those little strings on it that hold them on the hanger. He asked me what the string was and I told him and then he called me "too bougie for his taste" and stormed out.
A dream. Dreamed I cheated and stayed pissed an entire day.
However, if you're going through this list and can't help but think of the times you yourself have acted irrationally towards others, there are things you can do to keep cool.
"If you find yourself overreacting to a situation, you might keep in mind the acronym HALT [and ask yourself] am I hungry? Angry? Lonely? Tired? And then take care of the issue so that you do not keep overreacting," Dr. Johnson added.
I told him cows do not in fact drown through their a******s when they walk into water. Yes, he actually believed cows will just fill up with water the moment their a*s is underwater. No, I don't know how you could actually believe this.
I think I made him feel stupid but it's hard to explain cows can close their a******s without being at least unintentionally condescending.
For dyeing my hair, even when I hadn’t.
First day back after the summer holidays and I’m walking into my classroom and my teacher would not stop watching me, glaring at me but I continued and sat myself down at my seat.
She kept her eyes on my the whole time, as the rest of my class arrived and sat down. It was only when everyone had settled, that she called my name in front of everyone, causing all eyes to be on me.
The first thing that came out of her mouth was, “You’ve dyed your hair. It’s lighter.” Not asking, just accusing and so she gave me an instant detention. I told her that I hadn’t, that it got ever so slightly blonder because of being out in the sun more but she shook her head and told me not to lie and then gave me another detention.
Obviously, I didn’t go, so I got more detentions for not going but I didn’t go to those either. It went round and round until she stopped but deemed me a naughty child.
Guy at work drove a vehicle into a metal pole and blamed me. Was so mad at me. Actually reported me and told the manager it was my fault.
I was 50ft away from him when it happened, but because I was the last one to talk to him before the wreck, in his mind, I was somehow at fault.
A couple years ago a man angrily called me demanding to know why I had called him. I had not called him and was actually busy cooking when he called me. Maybe a year or so after that a woman accused me of stealing either her mother's phone or phone number. I'd had the number for probably a decade at that point so I don't know what that was about but I was having a bad day and we both got pretty loud and angry.
I was on a bus once, and this angry last just snapped and started yelling at me for not getting up and giving her my seat.
I had both my hands resting on my cane right in front of me. There were a dozen other people sitting down who weren't visibly disabled. .
When I was 16. Dating a girl who bought me a mouse teddy thing for Valentine's Day - I thought, 'awe that's sweet, something different!' So I said, 'That's really sweet, something different! I love it's a mouse! What made you pick the mouse?'
And she went mental.
I made it SUPER clear I liked it, and appreciated it, and the question was a genuine, 'what made you think of that, it's so cute, how'd you pick it, it was perfect' question. But no.
So she took a 150 Irish pounds + of a vintage locket I got her, and threw it in a drain.
Nutter.
One time I was walking down the street, then a woman who I'd never seen before tapped me on the shoulder and told me "You know what you did" and I responded with "I don't know what you're talking about" and she replied with "I know you're lying" then stormed off.
So, I don't know the reason she was mad at me, but I'm pretty sure that was the dumbest reason anyone had gotten mad at me.
Went through something similar. I was in a supermarket, paid for my groceries and headed toward the exit. As I was leaving, the woman behind me followed me and started cursing me loudly for "being ahead of her" (wtf?!) I suspect she had mental issues (and probably didn't take her medication).
An ex gf was mad at me cause her ear was painfull and she 100% believe she caught my "cauliflower ears" from having sex, like if it was a STD.
p.s : no i did not f**k her ear, nor grab it in any way.
I got banned from a Reddit sub for pointing out that punching someone in the chest poses a risk of commotio cordis.
Wait until you point out that punching someone in the throat can be fatal.
One time, a friend got really mad at me because I didn’t reply to their text right away. I was busy with work, and my phone was on silent. When I finally checked my phone, there were like 10 missed messages, all getting more and more upset. I replied as soon as I could, explaining that I was just caught up with work. But they were already furious, thinking I was ignoring them on purpose. It turned into this whole argument about how “true friends” make time for each other, even though it was just a few hours. It took days to smooth things over, all because I didn't respond right away.
I got written up when I worked at Walmart because I asked someone if they found everything okay instead of saying hello.
I have partial hearing loss, not enough to be counted as a disability, but enough to be annoying as there's a frequency almost dead-middle of the spectrum I cannot hear. And there is a small subset of the population I found that their natural speaking voice sits in that part I can't hear, so no matter what, their words unless they pitch it up or down slightly are unintelligible to me.
Anyways, I'm working at a store doing whatever, and I can hear *Something* but it sounded far off and directed elsewhere so I just ignored it. Out of the corner of my eye I can see this old woman just staring at me with a pissy look on her face, I asked her if there was anything she needed help with and I swear to god I cannot tell you what she said and I was staring right at her. So upon asking her to repeat herself she stomped off in a huff and bitched at my Manager who (thankfully) already had witnessed this issue. I guess he played up the guilt factor that she yelled at a "Deaf" person (I'm not deaf) and she conceded whatever her point was on my behavior.
I have bilateral moderate-to-severe hearing loss, and even with hearing aids have trouble hearing. People get irritated quickly when I ask them to repeat what they said more than once. Once I explain I have difficulty hearing, some will try again, but others just continue acting annoyed. They seem to think I should just make myself hear better! During covid and the wearing of masks, I just gave up trying because I need to be able to read lips.
Trying to steal their man and flirting.
Uhhh…Waitresses are paid to be friendly.
No one wants a man who dates crazy women.
Bye bye my tip.
I had a girlfriend break up with me because she got an eye injury and I told her to go to the ER. She wanted to study for her final exam.
She took a projectile to the orb (unrelated to me). She was leaking vitreous fluid. (TL:DR That’s the stuff that isn’t replaceable.). She ended up missing her final and was furious at me about it. I probably saved her eye with first aid & prompt Dx. Didn’t matter to her.
Thst was a life lesson for me: even when you’re right, relationships work on the value system of the partner as well as your own. I should have acknowledged her priorities better, even if they were dumb.
Would do it again tho….
For someone with such advanced technical vocabulary, I’m not sure they totally get how TL:DR works. I *am* sure, however, that in an alternate universe, the GF who lost the use of an eye was equally mad at them for not making her go to the ER.
I've had people get mad at me a couple times for not being willing to take a right on red when my view was obstructed.
I'm not going to risk my car and life just to save you 20 seconds.
Edit: the last time it happend some dude in a silver Jeep was literally honked and was frantically waving his arms to the right with his mouth open and an angry expression.
The the pure entitlement of people like that.
I had a guy like that once, who was then still stuck behind me for a good 10 minutes. 2 inches behind my bumper and honking and flashing his lights. I used to panic, now I just drive *exactly* the speed limit or just under it. He finally overtook me just before a bend, narrowly missed an oncoming tractor, swooped round the corner, and there…was a police car who pulled him over. I’ve never been so happy to see cops or laughed quite as much as I drove past him with a thumbs up.
My ex woke up livid and was hitting and pinching at me hard, cussing me out. She was so f*****g upset that I cheated on her in her dreams.
I was comforting her because she was sick and her grandmother died. She told me that whenever I showed her compassion, she would get irrationally angry at me. Her words, irrationally angry. Kinda ended stuff between us, because she said she didn't know why she did, but couldn't stop herself from reacting that way, and it wasn't healthy.
That's someone who wasn't 'allowed' to be upset or vulnerable as a child and had their distress continually dismissed or ignored. Their subconscious value system is that if they can't be completely emotionally in control of themselves then they are failing and letting others down. So to them you being caring and nice and comforting them feels like criticism
My toddler once raged at me 2x as hard as she was already raging when I handed her the milk bottle that she specifically requested I hand to her.
That was pretty dumb.
Toddler logic is wild 😂 my son once got mad at me because his left foot wasn't his right foot.
I was in an abusive friendship/roommate situation.
Leaving the gym once, my phone was at 2%. I was starving. He'd only go through the drive thru if I ordered ahead. He got furious at me for trying to complete my order before my phone died instead of hyping him up about the great workout we just had.
I wasn't smiling when I saw him. I also didn't say hi (or anything else) before he started asking why I was so pissed off.
I didn't put away the folding chair when I went to the kitchen to get a drink.
I limited the weed budget to 1k a month during the pandemic when I was the only one employed.
I got him socks for his birthday after he'd made comments the last two years at every gift giving occasion that he just wanted someone to get him socks. That wasn't the only thing I got him, but I did get him socks.
I asked him to pick up ham when he went to the store after two years of doing all the grocery shopping due to him being unemployed.
I asked him not to add extra salt to my plate
I asked him not to slide my gaming table top across the floor.
I looked up a diagram of something he was verbally explaining because I couldn't visualize it.
There's more, but those are the ones I remind myself of whenever he reaches out wondering why we can't try being friends again.
The weed budget was *limited* to 1k a month? Either that’s some very expense weed, or they’re using joints like an oxygen mask.
For not liking the same pizza toppings as them.
We always do, or grab a 2 for 1 special, etc. Why this is an issue for some mystifies me.
Load More Replies...Ppl need to learn to be able to tolerate people with different opinions. I feel like the internet has made this problem worse
Not everyone on the planet is going to like every single ingredient, there will be differences in taste preferences. You can get your green peppers on your pizza. I can have my ham and pineapple another time.
Get your own pizza and I'll get mine. Yum cold pizza for breakfast.
I like pizza with pineapple. I like my fries/chips doused with Tomato sauce/catchup instead of on the side. I prefer my Steak with Onions ontop, medium done. I like my Bread with syrup. So what if you like your food different from me. Eat, and let eat.
Load More Replies... Because I didn’t call her every hour while she was out with her friends
She ended up dumping me for that also - saying it showed I “didn’t care enough “.
I refused their 100$ bill at 7am when it was the first order for my till. F**k that bud I’m not a bloody bank.
My ex got mad at me because once on a date to a museum I didn't want him to push my manual wheelchair. I explained to him that him pushing my chair would feel like the equivalent of him picking me up and carrying me around the museum. He said he "needs to feel needed." I replied that it wasn't my responsibility to sacrifice my independence in order to make him feel needed. He pouted the rest of the day then gave me the silent treatment when I refused to apologize. I basically ghosted him after that.
Novel Idesa, sounds like you are far better off without him. There's some weirdos who see people in wheelchairs, or with mobility aids, and it become all about the saintly able-bodied person looking after and serving the disabled wretch. Uggh. Far better when people see each others as partners.
Load More Replies...Medical PA here - just got shouted at for asking a patient if they had eaten beetroot because they were panicking about haematuria. Guess what? 🙄
I fell asleep at a meeting. I was woken up with "Am I boring you??" I said yes, but I have narcolepsy. That shut her up.
i work from home answering calls i got a call from someone once they had called the wrong number when told them they called me a f*****g idiot and hung up. Like its somehow my fault
Few weeks ago I got a text message from some woman thanking me for taking her to the emergency room. I texted her back that this was a wrong number and hope she get better. We end texting back and forth for awhile. Found out she lived in Washington state. I live in Indiana. So there was a 3 hour difference. We had a nice text conversation.
Load More Replies...I once told a coworker "you look so pretty today." She never spoke to me again because l had, apparently, implied that she was ugly on all other days.
A bit like saying, "Wow! You've lost a lot of weight! You look great!" -
Load More Replies...Once had a friend blame me for her ankle getting hurt when I was pushed into her and fell. And she hung on to that for YEAR no matter how many times it was explained to her. Yeah, we aren't friends any more.
I got kicked out of a online sewing group for correcting one of the admins. She was convinced Aldi actually produced - as in had their own factories - the machines they sometimes sell. Her main argument was that she lived in Germany where Aldi is from so she knew better. Even showing her a Wikipedia page of the actual manufacturer didn't convince her. So she banned me 🤷♀️
My ex got mad because He asked " is that bean salad your making. I love bean salad" and I pushed the bowl towards him and said go ahead knock yourself out. ( I was in the middle of preparing food and very busy ) He stomped away and would not speak to me for a week. WHY ????? Because I should have said " here let me get some for you instead of knock yourself out. Way to masculine for a woman. YEP. So glad that is over.
I bought a house that had previously been a rental. During my first week, I had 3 different people (incl. a car repo guy) show up asking for "Angie". I explained to each of them that I had just bought the house and didn't know anyone who lived here before. The first guy started to get really angry and demanded that I tell him where Angie is and what her new phone number is because her old number was disconnected. I kept insisting that I didn't know Angie, but he wouldn't stop. He finally said "You tell her I want my money or my stuff or she's gonna regret it!" The second guy was basically the same, but I later caught him prowling in my back yard looking in the windows. He started yelling that if I was hiding Angie, I would regret it. I called the police, but the guy took off before they got here. The repo guy demanded I open my garage to prove I didn't have the car and that I show him my ID. (1/2)
(2/2) The repo guy threatened to call the police. I told him to go ahead and call the cops because it would just help prove the harassment I already had experienced. I never found out who Angie was, but I was pissed at her for a really long time. (edited for clarity)
Load More Replies...A dear friend must check anything he's told online. If he finds confirmation, then OK. If not, then he'll try to debate you that your info is not verifiable. It doesn't matter how minor or irrelevant the comment. You can say, "I think D&W can make a billion bucks." & he'll research exactly how much it's made & the odds of reaching that amount. Normally I don't care & just move on, who cares, right? Alas, lately he's starting to do it when you just express an opinion or mention a personal experience. One is not verifiable & the other it's literally calling you a liar. I may be misremembering something, but please take my word for it & move on, it's not research, just chatting. ::sigh!:: My biggest struggle is to get him to let things go. He's lucky I love his a*s. ;-)
My ex got angry at me coz I didn't enjoy watching animals with them. I said very clearly "it's not my thing" and I watched a couple movies with them but didn't enjoy it.
I had someone here on BP getting pretty upset with me because I believe in nisser and also teach my kids about nisser as if they are real entities. Turns out I am a horrible mom and I am gaslighting my kids and they will grow up hating me for lying to them. I never replied to the message because I don't thi k the angry BP'er would ever calm down on that topic. But if I had replied I'd have said 1) it is a 1000+ year long tradition in Denmark to believe in nisser. 2) it happens to be part of my personal faith to believe in nisser (among other things). I sometimes think about the angry BP'er and hope that he/she is happier now. 😊
My ex got mad at me because once on a date to a museum I didn't want him to push my manual wheelchair. I explained to him that him pushing my chair would feel like the equivalent of him picking me up and carrying me around the museum. He said he "needs to feel needed." I replied that it wasn't my responsibility to sacrifice my independence in order to make him feel needed. He pouted the rest of the day then gave me the silent treatment when I refused to apologize. I basically ghosted him after that.
Novel Idesa, sounds like you are far better off without him. There's some weirdos who see people in wheelchairs, or with mobility aids, and it become all about the saintly able-bodied person looking after and serving the disabled wretch. Uggh. Far better when people see each others as partners.
Load More Replies...Medical PA here - just got shouted at for asking a patient if they had eaten beetroot because they were panicking about haematuria. Guess what? 🙄
I fell asleep at a meeting. I was woken up with "Am I boring you??" I said yes, but I have narcolepsy. That shut her up.
i work from home answering calls i got a call from someone once they had called the wrong number when told them they called me a f*****g idiot and hung up. Like its somehow my fault
Few weeks ago I got a text message from some woman thanking me for taking her to the emergency room. I texted her back that this was a wrong number and hope she get better. We end texting back and forth for awhile. Found out she lived in Washington state. I live in Indiana. So there was a 3 hour difference. We had a nice text conversation.
Load More Replies...I once told a coworker "you look so pretty today." She never spoke to me again because l had, apparently, implied that she was ugly on all other days.
A bit like saying, "Wow! You've lost a lot of weight! You look great!" -
Load More Replies...Once had a friend blame me for her ankle getting hurt when I was pushed into her and fell. And she hung on to that for YEAR no matter how many times it was explained to her. Yeah, we aren't friends any more.
I got kicked out of a online sewing group for correcting one of the admins. She was convinced Aldi actually produced - as in had their own factories - the machines they sometimes sell. Her main argument was that she lived in Germany where Aldi is from so she knew better. Even showing her a Wikipedia page of the actual manufacturer didn't convince her. So she banned me 🤷♀️
My ex got mad because He asked " is that bean salad your making. I love bean salad" and I pushed the bowl towards him and said go ahead knock yourself out. ( I was in the middle of preparing food and very busy ) He stomped away and would not speak to me for a week. WHY ????? Because I should have said " here let me get some for you instead of knock yourself out. Way to masculine for a woman. YEP. So glad that is over.
I bought a house that had previously been a rental. During my first week, I had 3 different people (incl. a car repo guy) show up asking for "Angie". I explained to each of them that I had just bought the house and didn't know anyone who lived here before. The first guy started to get really angry and demanded that I tell him where Angie is and what her new phone number is because her old number was disconnected. I kept insisting that I didn't know Angie, but he wouldn't stop. He finally said "You tell her I want my money or my stuff or she's gonna regret it!" The second guy was basically the same, but I later caught him prowling in my back yard looking in the windows. He started yelling that if I was hiding Angie, I would regret it. I called the police, but the guy took off before they got here. The repo guy demanded I open my garage to prove I didn't have the car and that I show him my ID. (1/2)
(2/2) The repo guy threatened to call the police. I told him to go ahead and call the cops because it would just help prove the harassment I already had experienced. I never found out who Angie was, but I was pissed at her for a really long time. (edited for clarity)
Load More Replies...A dear friend must check anything he's told online. If he finds confirmation, then OK. If not, then he'll try to debate you that your info is not verifiable. It doesn't matter how minor or irrelevant the comment. You can say, "I think D&W can make a billion bucks." & he'll research exactly how much it's made & the odds of reaching that amount. Normally I don't care & just move on, who cares, right? Alas, lately he's starting to do it when you just express an opinion or mention a personal experience. One is not verifiable & the other it's literally calling you a liar. I may be misremembering something, but please take my word for it & move on, it's not research, just chatting. ::sigh!:: My biggest struggle is to get him to let things go. He's lucky I love his a*s. ;-)
My ex got angry at me coz I didn't enjoy watching animals with them. I said very clearly "it's not my thing" and I watched a couple movies with them but didn't enjoy it.
I had someone here on BP getting pretty upset with me because I believe in nisser and also teach my kids about nisser as if they are real entities. Turns out I am a horrible mom and I am gaslighting my kids and they will grow up hating me for lying to them. I never replied to the message because I don't thi k the angry BP'er would ever calm down on that topic. But if I had replied I'd have said 1) it is a 1000+ year long tradition in Denmark to believe in nisser. 2) it happens to be part of my personal faith to believe in nisser (among other things). I sometimes think about the angry BP'er and hope that he/she is happier now. 😊