Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”
User submission
314
112.3K

“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”

“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”“My SIL Can Barely Take Care Of Herself”: Woman Snaps When She Hears Her Brother’s Wife Wants Another Child And Threatens To Disown Her33 Y.O. Woman Snaps At Her Brother’s Wife For Wanting Another Baby, So Her Brother Threatens To Kick Her Out Of His HouseWoman Threatened To Disown Her SIL And Make Sure The Rest Of The Family Joins Her After Finding Out She Wants Another Baby, Wonders If She OverreactedBrother Threatens To Kick Out Sister He Took Into His Home After She Blew Up At His Wife For Wanting Another Baby“Her Daughter Is 6 Y.O. And She Doesn’t Even Interact With Her Unless She Has To”: Woman Snaps At Her SIL For Wanting Another Child And Threatens To Disown Her“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My SIL I Will Disown Her If She Gets Pregnant”
ADVERTISEMENT

Most people would agree that threatening to disown one’s family member is the last measure to be taken when nothing else has worked. An ultimatum of the sort was exactly the one this Redditor gave to her brother’s wife when she heard her talk about getting pregnant. This woman shared her experience living with her brother’s family, asking people online if such a step was appropriate in this situation.

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    A woman lives with her brother’s family and has a strong opinion about them having another child

    Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)

    She appreciated the couple helping her; however, she threatened to disown her SIL if she gets pregnant

    Image credits:NerveGlad8425

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Alexandru Panoiu (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Quazie (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Pat Pilon (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    The woman pays 2/3 of utilities, takes care of the household and her niece, in addition to working full-time

    Image credits: denisbin (not the actual photo)

    SIL refuses to cook or help around the house and only interacts with her 6 Y.O. daughter when she has to

    A woman moved in with her brother’s family during a difficult period when she was down on her luck and unemployed. She explains that she is incredibly thankful they helped her out. In the beginning, it was about her moving in while she was unemployed and helping around the house “until she was on her feet”. However, the family decided to extend the agreement even after the woman started working.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    This meant that now she was working 45 hours a week, doing almost all the household work at home, including looking after her brother’s 6-year-old daughter, and paying around two-thirds of the utilities. Of course, living with her brother’s family was voluntary, and despite sometimes arguing about the household work, they were getting along.

    The relationship changed when the couple shared their plans of having another child, to which the woman had very strong objections and threatened to disown her brother’s wife in addition to making other members of the extended family do the same. However, disowning her brother was not in her plans.

    She gives her reasons for doing so, the main being that her sister-in-law can barely take care of herself as she sleeps most of the day, does not clean, does not cook, and doesn’t take care of the child she already has. She only interacts with her 6-year-old daughter if she has to. Finally, her SIL lost custody of her 11-year-old son from a previous marriage, who said she abused him, and she did not fight to get him back.

    The woman’s brother told her he has an appointment to discuss vasectomy reversal so he and his wife can have a baby

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

    The woman told them if they had a baby she would disown her SIL and would make sure the rest of the family does the same

    Having these aspects in mind and the family being in a difficult financial situation, this woman claimed they were out of their minds to think of having another child. She asked the couple who was going to take care of a baby when she and her brother work full-time and his wife refuses to contribute even with simple chores. 

    This led to her brother’s wife locking herself in the bathroom and crying, while her brother threatened to kick her out. However, the woman answered that her brother cannot afford to kick her out, as she pays a big part of the bills and helps as a nanny and housekeeper.

    In her article, Amy Morin listed the most common reasons why people cut ties with their family members, which included sexual, physical, or emotional abuse or neglect, poor parenting, betrayal, drug abuse, disagreement, and physical or mental health problems.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Kristina Scharp explained for The Conversation that family estrangement occurs when at least one family member distances themselves from another family member because of a negative relationship or because they understand the relationship to be negative.

    She suggests that estrangement is not a particular event or outcome, but an ongoing process that varies in degree. For this reason, according to Scharp, it is more accurate to describe people as more estranged or less estranged, rather than estranged or not. 

    Estrangement is voluntary and intentional and is often based on ongoing issues. The decision to keep some distance between family members usually has a long history of conflict and negative experiences rather than being a sudden decision. However, sudden decisions of this sort occur as well.

    Finally, Scharp noted that while estrangement is stressful, it can be a healthy solution to an unhealthy environment that can help a person’s emotional and physical health.

    Redditors shared their take on the situation

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    112Kviews

    Share on Facebook
    Aura Vyšniauskaitė

    Aura Vyšniauskaitė

    Author, Community member

    Read more »

    Aura is a writer at Bored Panda. She finished her BA in Philosophy at Vilnius University. She lived in Prague for a few years, where she worked in Trade Compliance at DHL Express. Finally, she came back to Vilnius to continue her studies in Philosophy.

    Read less »
    Aura Vyšniauskaitė

    Aura Vyšniauskaitė

    Author, Community member

    Aura is a writer at Bored Panda. She finished her BA in Philosophy at Vilnius University. She lived in Prague for a few years, where she worked in Trade Compliance at DHL Express. Finally, she came back to Vilnius to continue her studies in Philosophy.

    Saulė Tolstych

    Saulė Tolstych

    Author, Community member

    Read more »

    Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

    Read less »

    Saulė Tolstych

    Saulė Tolstych

    Author, Community member

    Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I came into this one thinking "wow, screw you, you ungrateful judgemental witch" but now I've read it... I'd have had the exact same reaction. They're out of their damn minds.

    Jane Doe
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. "What business does she have telling them what to do?" OH, she is subsidizing their lives. He's paying for his first family. She is paying for his second.

    Load More Replies...
    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the brother came to his senses, I'd say don't get the reversal but say he did, and he can just say gosh, honey, I don't know why it's not happening. On the other hand, if he came to his senses he'd be out of there

    tabithapaquette98
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely NTA. She should move out ASAP. WTF are they thinking, having another child?

    Load More Comments
    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I came into this one thinking "wow, screw you, you ungrateful judgemental witch" but now I've read it... I'd have had the exact same reaction. They're out of their damn minds.

    Jane Doe
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. "What business does she have telling them what to do?" OH, she is subsidizing their lives. He's paying for his first family. She is paying for his second.

    Load More Replies...
    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the brother came to his senses, I'd say don't get the reversal but say he did, and he can just say gosh, honey, I don't know why it's not happening. On the other hand, if he came to his senses he'd be out of there

    tabithapaquette98
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely NTA. She should move out ASAP. WTF are they thinking, having another child?

    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda