Man Asks Date To Talk About “Real Things”, Ruins Everything As He Has Nothing To Say Himself
Meeting new people can be hard. Finding how to get acquainted can be tricky. And when it comes to dating, it’s even harder – after all, there you’re not only looking for a conversation pal but maybe even for a possible romantic partner.
There are ways to make this process easier; for example, by thinking about the topics you could talk about. At the same time, there are ways to make it even more challenging. Like putting on some kind of persona. That’s what happened in today’s story. A woman went on a date with a man who wanted to seem mysterious. Funnily, he miserably failed.
More info: TikTok
If dating wasn’t hard in itself, some people like to make it even harder
Image credits: yellerweller
Recently, a TikToker posted a video that went viral about her friend’s dating horror story
Nowadays, it isn’t uncommon to hear that dating is hard. In fact, almost half of Americans think dating is harder now than it was 10 years ago.
One of the reasons for this is the paradox of choice. It means that the more options you have, the harder it is to choose. With dating apps and overall online connectivity, it might seem that we have endless choices to meet someone. And so, it might be tough to choose if you even want to meet anyone.
There’s also stuff like safety. Getting catfished, receiving unwanted explicit photos and many similar things are genuine fears nowadays. And let’s not forget things like heteronormative societal expectations, as well as family and personal ones.
In this piece, we’re focusing mostly on those personal expectations. To be more specific, the way they manifest in communicating during dates.
The thing that inspired this topic was TikTok creator @yellerweller’s viral video, which currently sits at 4.8M views. In it, Danielle tells a story about how her friend went on a date with a wannabe manic pixie dream boy (MPDB). In pop culture, an MPDB can be described as “a self-mythologizing ‘free-spirited’ dude who’s determined to make your life magical, whether you want it or not.”
Image credits: Katerina Holmes (not the actual photo)
During this date, the friend started making small talk with the man, but soon he interrupted her saying he wanted to talk about “real stuff” instead
In reality, we could say it’s a man who wants to be kind of mysterious and authentic. Why we dubbed the man in the story this way is because of the way he acted. For the first several minutes of the date, both he and the woman made small talk. Soon, he interrupted her, because he wanted to talk about meaningful and “real” stuff instead.
Basically, he wanted to show how “unshallow” he is and that he cares about more significant stuff than something like how many siblings his date has. Well, some people indeed tend to dislike small talk, as it can feel hard for them. Yet, in this situation, it seemed that the man wanted to look more interesting rather than having trouble with small talk.
But the woman wasn’t planning to let this intimidate her. She asked him what he wanted to talk about, to give her an example. This took the man aback. Then he only said that she should ask him meaningful questions, nothing more. So, she asked for examples again. He still had nothing.
So, it became clear that he just wanted to appear deep, but didn’t have anything to base this on. As it was phrased in the video, he simply put on a persona he couldn’t fulfill. No surprise that the woman stood up and left the date – it was unlikely that the relationship would go any further.
Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual photo)
So, she asked him what exactly he wanted to talk about, but he didn’t have anything prepared, so she walked out after understanding it was just a move to appear mysterious
People in the comments were very entertained by this story. Some even reminisced about Twiggy’s famous interview where she couldn’t name any philosophers when Woody Allen asked about them. But she put him in his place when she repeated the question to him and he couldn’t name any either.
Basically, both the interview and the video are stories of men trying to make women look stupid. Luckily, both women were smarter and were able to rebuff. Still, it’s sad that instead of trying to build genuine connections, people feel the need to put on some kind of persona or try to humiliate others.
So, it’s no wonder that dating is so hard. If other factors don’t make it difficult enough, people go around pulling moves like these. Even if that works with the first try, pretending to be someone you’re not is not a long-term solution. In one way or another, your true dullness will be revealed, just maybe not on the first date. And that’s the “best” way to waste someone’s time.
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Watch the video here
@yellerweller like okay you have the floor!! go wow me with your deep conversation #baddatestory #storytimestiktok #datestorytime #forthegirlies #datingstorytime #baddate #pickmeboy #chismestiktok ♬ original sound – Danielle
People online were questioning what drives someone to act this way and recalled other stories of women putting entitled men in their place
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
For me, people like this think they're intellectually superior to their date or try to appear this way and the reason some don't like small talk is because they have nothing to say except that they want to appear clever and "not boring" but by behaving this way, it actually shows their flaws massively as they can't have a normal conversation. You can't get to know someone without small talk. I think we need to get to know someone more before we go on a date! This foolishness would probably stand out if we had more conversations before agreeing to a date!
People like to complain about small talk alot but its a genuinely useful tool in socializing. "How are you doing today?" - Regardless if they give a generic answer or not, you can gather what kind of mood they are in and can tailor what you talk about. If someone gives you a neutral reaction, especially I'd they are normally positive; maybe don't go off about how great your time at the fair was. Further more, to start getting to know someone? Its essential because it's the first step. Its information gathering so you can figure out what sorts of things they are into. Unless you are coming together on a shared interest you have no clue where theur interests lie.
Pretentious persona aside, maybe the man didn't have much to say. No job, no hobbies, etc. If he hates small talk, there must a philosophy class where he can lurk to his wee heart's content. Maybe he'll find the woman of his dreams to give him a TED talk about Emmanuel Kant and accept silence in return.
For me, people like this think they're intellectually superior to their date or try to appear this way and the reason some don't like small talk is because they have nothing to say except that they want to appear clever and "not boring" but by behaving this way, it actually shows their flaws massively as they can't have a normal conversation. You can't get to know someone without small talk. I think we need to get to know someone more before we go on a date! This foolishness would probably stand out if we had more conversations before agreeing to a date!
People like to complain about small talk alot but its a genuinely useful tool in socializing. "How are you doing today?" - Regardless if they give a generic answer or not, you can gather what kind of mood they are in and can tailor what you talk about. If someone gives you a neutral reaction, especially I'd they are normally positive; maybe don't go off about how great your time at the fair was. Further more, to start getting to know someone? Its essential because it's the first step. Its information gathering so you can figure out what sorts of things they are into. Unless you are coming together on a shared interest you have no clue where theur interests lie.
Pretentious persona aside, maybe the man didn't have much to say. No job, no hobbies, etc. If he hates small talk, there must a philosophy class where he can lurk to his wee heart's content. Maybe he'll find the woman of his dreams to give him a TED talk about Emmanuel Kant and accept silence in return.
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