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Delivering the perfect wedding toast is far from an easy task. But ruining it? That can be done in a heartbeat. The booze and fear of public speaking make sure of it.

But what takes the experience to the highest stress levels is the fact that nobody forgets a bad wedding speech. To prove you this universal truth, we at Bored Panda put together the cringiest and worst things people have told brides and grooms on their big day.

From a best man talking about losing his virginity to a priest who thinks he's at a funeral, here's a collection of stories you wouldn't like to see reenacted at your own ceremony.

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#1

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Μy sister got married in a small Ϲanadian Mennonite community. The grooms bеst man, Josh, was black. Josh started оff his speech by saying "I'm Josh, thе one you have been staring at аll day". Everybody laughed so hard.

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Wedding planner Lisa Burton, who has about 15 years of experience throwing weddings abroad, said the best man and the father of the bride are the most traditional speech givers at a wedding. "The best man's speech is usually more comical, featuring stories about the groom, often rather embarrassing ones. The father’s speech is generally to thank guests for attending and sharing stories about the bride and of course to welcome the groom to the family," Burton told Bored Panda.

Burton has planned over 1,600 weddings and she said the speeches traditionally take place after dinner and is one of the last formalities before the party starts. "However, recently couples are choosing to have their speeches before dinner, allowing those involved to relax and enjoy themselves, rather than be nervous throughout the meal about their impending speech and how it may be received."

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"The less conventional couples we work with choose to leave out speeches altogether, opting for a more relaxed day overall with very little tradition or formality.," the wedding planner added.
#2

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I work as a banqueting chef, and last year after the wedding had happened, vows said, rings exchanged, and bellies filled with food and wine, the groom stood to say the following: 'Today I married the woman of my dreams, and I'd like to thank her for everything she has done for me. I would also like to thank my best man, who has been f**king her since we got engaged...
...With that, he mumbled a 'cheers,' downed his champagne, and got a taxi to the airport to start his honeymoon alone. It turns out he found out four months before the wedding and had told the father of the bride everything was costing more, [the father] was writing cheques to cover his little girl's special day, and all the money went toward the groom's new life out of the country.

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Paul C.
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Got invited to the wedding of one of the Directors at work. He was without doubt one of the most obnoxious people I've ever met. He had no real friends hence the invites to work colleagues. Free meal so, hey, why not? He chose one of his co directors, as best man, even though he had nothing good to say about him. Needless to say, the "Best Man" didn't write a speech, but instead got drunk and rambled on for about fifteen minutes about absolute nonsense. It was, sad, cringeworthy, painful and hilarious all in one. Felt sorry for the bride, who seemed a lovely lady, but God only knows why she married him.

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Michelle Lew, the owner of Lavender Crown Events, a wedding planning company servicing San Jose, Silicon Valley, and the surrounding areas, explained to Bored Panda that one of the first things she tells people is, "Remember it is a toast, not a speech."

"Toasts are generally 2-4 minutes long whereas speeches are 5+ minutes (but usually 10+)," Lew said. "A lot of times, the speech may be great, but guests will easily get bored if it is too long, especially when there are 4 long speeches back to back."

"While couples may ask a certain person to give a toast, it's important that they also consider what is off-limits," Lew pointed out. "Often, I've seen embarrassing stories included in speeches that the couple doesn't want to be shared. In other cases, I've also heard bad speeches where the speaker would side with one person of the couple rather than consider them a pair. For example, there was one instance where the bride's sister (the maid of honor) gave a speech that outwardly disdained the groom rather than celebrating the couple's future together. I believe the main cause of a bad speech is when the speaker and the couple truly do not understand each other or do not have the best intentions."

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When a speaker is invited, they should know the limits of what to share and what to omit, Lew said.
#3

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I've only been to one wedding, and it was my dad's cousin's wedding. My dad's uncle (the groom's father) did a toast when the groom and bride were at the altar (is this normal? Everyone around me seemed confused), and he said, 'I'm glad I made it out here today. I just want you guys to know that I have cancer and I'm going to die soon. Congrats to my son and his beautiful bride. Enjoy your time!' Everyone was in complete silence. It was the most awkward thing I've possibly ever witnessed. FWIW, this was in 2008, and the groom's father is still alive.

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However, the lines aren't always clear. "There’s a difficult balance when deciding what to include in a wedding speech," Lisa Burton said.

"I don’t think there's anything wrong with harmless innuendo, but I do think being too personal and too rude is bad taste. Remember that the speech is meant to entertain rather than an opportunity to embarrass or take the limelight away from the bride and groom."

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The wedding planner thinks speeches are a lovely way to celebrate the bride and groom’s love story and likes to encourage her less traditional couples to be creative in how they present their speeches.

But if a couple decides to, Burton said they can even leave out speeches altogether. "After all, rules were made to be broken weren’t they?" At least that way you know for sure that the only people attendants risk insulting are themselves.
#4

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Father of the bride described her as the 'ugly duckling' of the family, got booed.

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#5

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my parent's wedding the priest started with "We are gathered at this funeral today..." the worst part is he started going on with the typical funeral speech until he was stopped. To be fair he was well past retirement age.

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#6

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech One wedding I went to, the pastor started giving the typical 'marriage is hard work' speech. He talks about how many marriages fail and all the people he's counseled through divorce. He goes on about how on their wedding day, they're just like this couple who thinks they're going to make it but six months later they're getting a divorce...
...I'm trying hard to keep a straight face, the groom is starting to look like he wants to punch the guy, and I can hear people behind me disguising laughing as coughing. I keep expecting him to bring it around to something positive, but he doesn't. Fifteen minutes of 'marriage is hard and lots of them don't work.' Find out at the reception, he was a family friend. With a lifelong unrequited crush on the bride.

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#7

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At a wedding I went to recently, during his speech, the best man went off on a super-awkward tangent about how he lost his virginity to the bride and how he never would have guessed she'd end up with his best friend (the groom).

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#8

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech 'I can't believe you got her pregnant and haven't told anyone yet.' —(very drunk best man). Whole crowd goes silent enough that you can hear crickets outside; father of the bride's face just goes bright red in rage.

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#9

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man: 'When you told me that someday I would be your best man, I never thought it would be a half a year later. I just hope you know what you are doing.' They got divorced four months later (they had only been dating a couple months).

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Wendy McCallister
Wendy McCallister
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Being together a few months means nothing. My husband and I dated long distance for 5 months and are still together 36 years later

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#10

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wife's best friend/maid of honor called me the wrong name in her toast. The name she called out: my wife's ex boyfriend. I laughed it off at the time, but to be honest I was pretty humiliated.

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DennyS (denzoren)
DennyS (denzoren)
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, that would have cut me deep because my classic overthinking self would wonder if it was a mistake or intentional.

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#11

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Was at a wedding where the father of the bride was giving his speech and talked about his daughter's butt and had her stand up and turn around so everyone could see it. He then proceeded to talk about the bride and groom getting it on.

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#12

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my brother-in-law's wedding the grandmother of the bride was asked to say grace before the meal. My father and I happened to be standing by the bar after getting one last drink before it closed during the meal. We figured we would stand there during the 30 seconds or so while she blessed the food. She pulls out three pieces of paper, completely full front and back, and starts in on the history of the bride's family. Here is what so-and-so is doing now. When and where everyone has moved into their current homes. Updates on nieces, nephews, cousins' parents, grandparents, everyone. No one knew she was going to get up there and talk for 15+ minutes about people nobody cared about. My dad and I actually finished our drinks and ordered two more by the time she was done. I refer to it as 'The 3 Drink Grace.'

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T. D. Bostick
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Get a clue. God already knows all that. I hate it when people pray to the room.

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#13

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech This was at my cousin's wedding. My cousin and his buddy had a pact if you will, they would be each other's best men. OK, all well and good, only catch is during their toast they had to MOON the RECEPTION at the end of the speech. So back to cousin's wedding: He is giving his speech, yada yada known this guy forever. Then at the very end he is about to pass the mic back. 'Oh wait, almost forgot.' Sets the mic down, turns around stands on a chair, and moons the wedding reception. Bride's family promptly left. I think my cousin forgot all about that because he looked blindsided. Luckily my side of the family found it hilarious.

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Demi Zwaan
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Geez, bad sports, the family of the bride. This is just a bit of fun between good friends. No need to be all offended.

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#14

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech "This (possibly apocryphal) story was told to me by my friend's wife at the dinner table, as I was very nervously preparing to make a speech at her wedding. I'm not sure how she thought it would help. I was planning to do some edgy enough jokes so, in retrospect, she may have intended it as a warning. Anyway. Some friend of a friend of hers was at a wedding of some people I'll call John and Kate. The best man told a joke:
'After John and Kate's first night together, John told Kate he'd make her breakfast in bed. He reappeared minutes later and presented her with a piece of lettuce on a plate. Kate asked 'Why are you giving me lettuce for breakfast?' To which John replied, 'I wanted to see if you ate like a rabbit too!' According to my friend, Kate took this joke very badly, and her family was extremely offended."

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WilvanderHeijden
WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's poor taste to joke about sex, looks and family during any formal occasion, but especially during weddings where half of the guests are strangers to the other half.

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#15

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My brother's best friend (been friends since childhood) gave a speech at his wedding that lasted about five minutes. He said nothing about the bride at all, only mentioned that my brother was a 'good guy,' and then proceeded to talk about his failed marriage (his ex-wife was in attendance), his child custody battle, and how much it pained him to see how happy the newlyweds looked since it brought back memories of his own failed marriage. To top it all, he spoke in a really even, unemotional monotone.

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#16

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my cousin's wedding, one of the groom's best friends gave a short speech that was honestly quite touching, until he stumbled over his words, and said "Well, if these two can get married, uh, anyone can."

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#17

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At a friend's wedding the bride's sister gave an excruciatingly awkward speech about how her sister was able to find love before her and she didn't feel complete. It went on for about 5 minutes and she was blubbering and sobbing up a storm. Then she topped it off by singing an off-key song.

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#18

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech After stumbling his way through he awkwardly finishes with, 'Sorry man, I'll do better at your next one.' The bride's father pulled him aside and tore him a new one right afterward.

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#19

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my father's wedding to his new wife, he mistakenly called his bride by his ex-wife's (my mother's) name during his speech to her.

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#20

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The bride made a speech to thank everyone for coming, but it turned out to be a speech about herself and how amazing she is, nothing about her new husband, she ended up explaining how she always licks her plate clean, then she licked her plate clean in front of 250 people. In her defense she was so drunk she could barely stand. Gotta love working weddings.

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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do not get drunk at wedding receptions, it is in poor taste. The hosts should never get drunk while hosting - period.

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#21

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Groom's father made a speech along the lines of 'we knew she was a keeper when he brought her home and we heard them f**king in the bathroom.' AWK-WARD. Well, everyone pretty much laughed, myself included. The bride on the other hand looked mortified. Like bright red. My table kind of all looked at each other like, this is hysterical, but omg, that's the father of the groom! He was pretty wasted from what I gather.

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#22

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my sisters wedding the grooms best man was basically airing out the grooms dirty laundry to everyone.

Pro tip: If your speech puts the groom/bride in a negative light, rewrite it. Don't ruin someones happy day.

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Weddings are supposed to be festive moments. I really don't understand why people would talk shït about groom, bride or family "for fun".

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#23

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my sisters wedding, my alcoholic uncle went up and said a couple words.

Them being: "I'm surprised you managed to have a successful wedding, how did this happen without your mom being the over controlling b***h that she is?"

A silence like no other.

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#24

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My brother was my best man and told a very touching story about when I was 16 and lied and cheated to skip baseball practice to instead hang out with my girlfriend on the bleachers. I met my wife when I was 18. Thanks, bro.

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#25

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man rifled through all the groom's failed past relationships, in some detail. Then he made fun of the bride and groom for meeting on Christian Mingle or some s**t like that.

It was pretty brutal. Really killed the mood.

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#26

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man's speech consisted of him saying "I hope your ups and downs are in bed."

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DennyS (denzoren)
DennyS (denzoren)
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know why, and I'm assuming its due to crappy movies, that the speech includes sexual references.

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#27

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech When my cousin got married, most of the close family knew that the groom had been caught cheating multiple times in the past, but the majority of the people attending did not. During a small speech discussing the marriage counseling he had done with the couple, the priest went on a long rant about the groom's past infidelity and how he was confident it would not happen again. Given how few people in the church knew about the issues, it became very tense.

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WilvanderHeijden
WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's why it's a bad idea to have a priest as marriage counselor. They don't know what they are talking about and they don't know when to shut up. Living in celibacy means that you aren't qualified to give advice to married people.

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#28

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man's speech recounted the tale of when the bride urinated in someone else's shoes under a table.

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#29

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Went to my uncle's wedding a while back. His bride had been divorced and chose her family pastor to officiate. The pastor called my uncle her ex-husband's name during the vows multiple times... My family was not happy.

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#30

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I went to a wedding where neither family was happy about it. The groom's best man was his younger brother. The best man's toast to the bride was, 'We always thought groom would marry XX (points to woman at the back), but here we are, so bride, welcome to the family'...
...Both the groom and XX were former housemates of mine, and had been in a long relationship. I kinda thought they'd end up together too. Bride and groom moved in with her parents. Groom stopped talking to his friends. XX married someone else, left the country. I haven't heard from either of them even once this century.

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#31

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Fundie wedding two years ago. The minister took the opportunity to make a 45-minute sermon, said 'obey' many times. He stressed over and over again that the bride will never have a will of her own again. She was just a rib to the man she was now bound to. Father of the bride then had his speech. He gave a long-winded telling of the disgruntled ex-coworker's shooting spree in the hospital. He told about his wife locking the door and hiding. He gave coroners' reports of where people were shot and how one person that had been shot in the head had played possum, then called the police. The father of the bride wasn't even there, but this shootout seemed to be the best thing that ever happened to him. He just showed way too much enthusiasm. Then to finish, he mentioned that the groom was the extra security hired after the incident and met his phlebotomist daughter. Then the testimonials began...
...The bulk was: It WILL get worse. Just get stronger with Jesus. Nobody shared stories of growing together and the adventure of raising a family. Nope, none of that. Life is over as you do your duty. It was like a eulogy.

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Tamra Stiffler
Tamra Stiffler
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good grief. I insisted that all the "obey" BS be removed from our vows.

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#32

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my brother's wedding I accidentally said his ex wife's name during my best man speech. They both laughed and took it well but I was 1000% mortified.

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#33

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The parents of the groom stood up there for their speech and went through each age (he is 30) and read blurbs from his report card. The speech itself was insanely long. At the end of it, they asked their son to please come back to their church.

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"They asked their son to please come back to their church." I'm quite sure that he had plenty of good reasons to leave the church.

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#34

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech There is a tradition in some circles where the best man's speech "roasts" the groom. A well-done roast follows a cycle of build-him-up-and-knock-him-down, but I was at a wedding where the best man just basically insulted the groom for 10-15 minutes. After the first couple minutes, the discomfort in the audience was palpable...the laughs turned into polite chuckles and then into just silence.

To make things worse, he had printed out his speech using a ridiculously tiny font, and kept losing his place. By the time the fourth or fifth pause came around someone actually shouted out "just say 'cheers' and shut up already!", but sadly the speech continued.

(I found out later that the groom was so pissed off by the whole thing that he didn't speak to the best man for a several months after that.)

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#35

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech A friend was getting married, and the best man decided that in his toast he would try to compliment how beautiful the bride was. He ended up saying "It took a team of bridesmaids and scientists to get her looking like that." Nice try, really awkward.

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#36

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech A couple years ago, my fiancé's best friend got married. He and two others were the best men, but only two of them had decided to say something, fiancé being one of them. Anyway, he gets up and tells a funny story about the groom being so nervous about the first date. Then, the second guy gets up and whips out a good 30 index cards, and not the normal small index cards, oh no, the big ones...
...We stood there for a good 25 minutes while this guy took us through every little detail of the groom and his friendship... We had to hear about them meeting for the first time as lifeguards, then them playing video games, complete with what video games and a play-by-play of what happened in said video games. It was the worst speech. Finally the DJ started playing music to get him to stop — the kid still had about 10 more cards to go.

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WilvanderHeijden
WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just a case of bad planning. You can ask anyone to speech, but you also set the boundaries about content, language and duration of the speech. And if you have to fear the worst, you can tell people not to speech.

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#37

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My dad is a really funny and loving man, but he is not a good public speaker. When my younger sister got married a few years ago he gave this rambling speech about how she was a "plane that just taxied on the runway forever and you wondered if it would ever take off". He was trying to say she was a late bloomer I think, but he made the hand motion of a plane just going on the runway and never taking off. We gave him a ton of s**t for that, because he essentially told everyone at the wedding that he didn't think she "blossomed" until she met her husband who is the life of the party. So on to my wedding a few months ago... I told him that after my sister's speech, he really needed to step up his game. I said this all jokingly, because I was so sure he got enough hell for his first speech that he'd put a lot more effort into mine. Nope. He told everyone that he thought I was autistic when I was young and ended it by saying "but I don't think she turned out to be". I spent the rest of my wedding night fake laughing at everyone's autism jokes. Thanks Dad.

TLDR: Dad called my sister a plane that never took off and called me autistic. Love you Dad!

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#38

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man got pretty lit before the speech and goes off-script and tells a lighthearted funny story about how the groom bet him $20 he wouldn't s**t his pants at the strip club while he was getting a lap dance. Long story short, he did s**t his pants, and then one of the groomsman took his mic away in a move straight out of Old School.

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#39

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wedding.....

We didn't really plan speeches, but we knew the family wanted to do some. So my husbands brother (best man) did one, it was funny, he was 18 at the time, so it was pretty good. Very heartfelt. His little sisters did one, they were 9 and 21. Really nice, wedding appropriate, and short. Both our parents did one. His was nice, and mine did a great job. Like the others, nice, heartfelt, and they kept it light and fun. Well......my sisters were bridesmaids, one the maid of honor, the other a bridesmaid. They were 22 and 26. The speech starts fun, a couple jokes....then in turned into a 15 minute speech about them. How, it was a battle over the maid of honor position, or who was the better sister, or who they thought would have gotten married first and so on. The speech was essentially about them. Nothing mentioned about me, or my husband (cause you know, we were the ones getting married) or the day, just them. I could see people cringing. I cringed, my parents cringed, everyone did... I was just glad when it was done.

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#40

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Went to a wedding where bride's dad was sick with cancer. He also hadn't been a great dad to her (wasn't around when she was growing up, never paid child support despite having lots of money). The father of the bride's wife (think evil stepmother) made a super long speech about how great he was as a dad and how strong he was for battling cancer, etc. She never said anything about the bride or groom just made a toast to thank father of the bride for everything he has done/ gone through. It was so inappropriate & awkward to make it about him not the bride & groom. Stepmom was also a huge factor in separating father & daughter throughout her life.

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#41

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my cousin's wedding, her boss got wasted and told a story about her nephew watching p**n in a hotel on a family trip. It came out of nowhere and everyone was sufficiently confused and uncomfortable. I was young and someone had made the mistake of serving me wine, so I just laughed and laughed in the otherwise silent room. They had to turn off the mic and then just closed the speeches for the rest of the night.

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#42

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech We recently attended the wedding of one of my wife's cousins.

We had never met the groom before and the cousin isn't at family functions very much, so we didn't know what to expect.

Three best men each gave a speech.

Each speech involved both the bride and groom being drunk.

I thought I had stumbled into a surprise intervention.

As an aside, the groom immediately shotgunned two beers as soon as the ceremony was over...in the church parking lot.

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ZAPanda
ZAPanda
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2 years ago

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two beers would do precisely nothing to me, tbh. Would have to be two double tequilas.

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#43

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At one of my best friends' weddings, I was a bridesmaid, and my friend (the groom), asked me to double check one of his groomsmen's speeches as he was afraid that he'd say something that the bride wouldn't approve of. His speech was actually pretty decent, I helped him with a few things (like he repeated himself a lot, so I helped him fix that, and he said something that could have been interpreted as an insult to the bride, [but wasn't intended as such] and I helped him rephrase it so it sounded nice).

Now the worst speech, it wasn't from the groomsman I helped, the groomsman that the groom was worried about... no, that would have been too easy, too preventable. No, the worst speech came from the best man. Why? Because he didn't write anything, or even really think about it before hand, he figured "how hard can writing a speech be? I'll just improvise"

His speech ended up being a slur of: "You guys are good together"s and "I hope you guys last forever"s mixed in with many, many "um"s and "uh"s. It was honestly embarrassing to listen to, and it went on for probably a good 2-3 minutes. I'm pretty sure everyone in attendance was communally cringing in empathetic embarrassment.

The groomsman I was told to watch over then gave his speech, which ended with everyone applauding (though it might just have been the contrast they were applauding...). As I said, his speech was actually pretty good before my intervening, clearly the groom had me editing the wrong person...

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#44

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I was the best man at me Brothers wedding and I knocked the whole toast thing out of the park. I wrote this bit about him always being full of surprises and getting himself in trouble, just to make him sweat a bit, but I only mentioned the stuff everybody else already knew, nothing that was really bad or still a secret that I've heard about his fraternity days.

Later that evening after the drinks have been pouring one of his frat brother grooms men decided he got to give a speech as well. He decided to continue where I left off and recall stories that I willingly left out, stories of ex-girlfriends, run ins with campus law enforcement, and the like.

Thankfully most of the family had left by that time.

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amandawoods71 avatar
Incitatus
Incitatus
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

After "me brothers," anyone else read this in a Scottish accent?

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#45

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At one wedding reception I attended, the bride's teenaged sister gave the first speech. It was a twenty-minute crying jag about how mature her older sister was for "waiting until she had married the man she loved," and how wise she was for not having sex with the first guy who crossed her path. Confessional toasts are never a good idea. Especially in front of your grandparents.

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boredpanda_48 avatar
ZAPanda
ZAPanda
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yeah but how do you think your grandparents got to be grandparents if they didn't have sex? I mean really... you'd be surprised what naughty buggers they were if you actually ask them.

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#46

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I was best man at my dad's second wedding, which I thought was a little weird but there was about a 5 second moment as I was walking up to the podium where it hit me hard how profoundly weird it was to give a best man's speech for your dad. I was silent for a few seconds as I looked around like "What the heck is going on?"

Looked down at my script and the performer in me came out, but those couple of seconds really stuck with me.

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#47

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My aunt got married to a guy who tends to get really nervous in front of big crowds, and when the wedding officiant was having them repeat the vows, it took him like 20 tries because he kept stuttering and/or saying complete opposite words. He actually said "I _________, take you to be my lawfully wedded husband, uh, uh, uh, husb... Uh, wife?"

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#48

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man gave the most redneck speech ever at the most redneck wedding ever and included the fact that most of the groomsmen hadn't liked the bride when they met her and the funny time the groom and him got h*****s.

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#49

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech "I'm not a man of many words, so I'll just say - thanks for coming and good luck to the happy couple"

Father of the bride. I cringed a little inside. I can understand people who don't like to do speeches (I'm one of them), but on your only daughter's wedding day, I felt a little more than that could have been said!

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#50

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wife's friend got married two weeks ago, and the maid of honor said "ablutely" instead of "absolutely." She also said that she was "excited," but pronounced it as "ek-SKY-ted." I couldn't believe it...

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Naesil
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh the horror! someone mispronounced a word when giving a speech. /s

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