trans masc here, for me its just people calling me as a guy instead of a "trans guy" the ability to tell people im a guy and them not looking at me weird. being able to just not bring it up because its not relevent

Hi! Transmasc guy here. I think you and your coworkers are doing a great job. What I, at least, hoped for was assurance, that I was still loved and supported unconditionally. And my family did that for me, and I'm very grateful for it. You and your coworkers are doing great. It can be an absolute BEAST to deal with dysphoria and hate in today's world, but you and your coworkers helping definitely helped back her up there. Support is everything.

trans masc enby here, it sounds like you and your co-workers are already doing phenomenal, I love all the sensitivity you're putting into this and hearing about the support makes me so happy. If you're still wondering about ways to support her, you can always ask her! You can say, "hey (name), I just wanted to ask how I can best support you as you are transitioning." Acceptance looks different for everyone, and maybe she would like the over-the top support, or comments on transitional milestones, but that can be a great thing to ask about. :)

Hi, JB. First, my trans credentials: 1) I've known I was trans since 1960, when I was 6. 2) I transitioned in 1983 and kept my teaching job in Baltimore City Schools. I taught for another 29 years as my authentic self. Now for my reply to your question. You don't have to understand us to be an ally. Your descriptions of how things were handled with your co-worker indicates to me that you and the others in that workplace were acting as allies, being considerate and accepting. Keep up the good work.

So a significant amount of people are like you and me, and have no strong internal sense of gender. We just go along with whatever we're labelled because we don't care. But a significant amount of people do have a strong internal sense. Women who get upset at being called "sir" or men who feel threatened at the idea of boys with painted fingernails are probably in this group, they strongly identify as their born gender and it's painful to be misgendered. Trans people are exactly the same except that they identify as the gender opposite to the one they were assigned at birth. Sometimes that is dysmorphia (being extremely uncomfortable in your body) but sometimes it's just a strong feeling of "wrongness", again, pain at being misgendered. I can't explain it better because I don't feel that strong sense, but after doing a lot of reading on the topic that is what I've understood.

Kid who likes stereotypically girl things = girl. Kid who likes stereotypically boy things = boy. It's just traditional stereotypes repackaged as progressive, except instead of social pressure to change personality to match body the pressure is on changing body to match personality. It's tragic that kids are being taught they need to look a certain way in order to like what they like. It's heinous that medical professionals and industries are taking advantage of it to monetize the lifelong medicalization of vulnerable patients.

Why were you downvoted? Yeesh. I'd say, YES. Visibility is important you never know when some queer or trans kid might walk past and think "at least someone in this town is accepting" and just feel better. Also you might find out that you have a friend who's been afraid to tell you their truth, and seeing you be open about being an ally might give them someone safe in their life! I was afraid for many years to go to pride parades because I was "just an ally" but when I finally realized that actually I'm bi and I went to one, literally nobody was policing anything, nobody cared if you were queer or if you were an ally, it was just happiness at being alive and being able to be open and handing out free beaded necklaces and little flags and candy. A celebration of life. I can't speak for everybody but I'm sure that more people will appreciate the gesture than might be upset at it.