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Man Suspects Son Isn’t His, Takes Paternity Test And Leaves Family After It Shows He Was Right
In an article I read a couple of years ago, I came across a very paradoxical statement: “The paternity test, which has ruined so many families and lives throughout decades of its existence.” I don’t remember exactly what that article was about – but I remember well my surprise at such wording. After all, it’s not the paternity test that destroys families, but human infidelity and anger.
Why did I remember this? Well, because here is today’s story about approximately the same thing – how a guy secretly did a paternity test for his 5YO son only to find out that the child was not his, and that five years ago, his wife had what she called ‘a one-night stand…’
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
The author of the post recently did a paternity test for his 5YO son – and it exposed that he’s not the father
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The couple had been together for 9 years, with 6 years married – but the man decided to file for divorce on the spot
Image credits: throwaway47261717
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman confessed that it was ‘a one-night stand’ after a big argument they had years ago – but nothing more
Image credits: throwaway47261717
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The man was adamant – he decided to cut contact both with the woman and the boy
Image credits: throwaway47261717
Most of the relatives sided with the author, but his ex’s sister called him out for being a ‘weak, pathetic man’
So, there lived two spouses, almost a decade together, six years of which they had been married, they had a son, 5 years old. At some point, the Original Poster (OP) began to suspect that the son was not his. We don’t know what exactly was going on – maybe the boy was growing up quite differently than he expected – but the guy started to worry, and secretly did a DNA test. And he learned the most unsightly truth…
When the enraged husband came home with the test results, the wife first tried to deny it, but then confessed to infidelity. But this, according to her own words, happened only once – right after some serious argument between the spouses. The woman, as she says, never saw that dude again.
According to the wife, she saw how happy her husband was about the birth of their son, what a good father he was, and she was afraid that confession would ruin their family. Well, it turned out that the end of this story was only postponed. The original poster declared that he was filing for divorce, and that he didn’t want to have anything to do with either her or her son.
No pleas, no admonitions from the wife had any effect on the man. He left and, in a wave of anger, told literally all his relatives and friends about what happened. According to the OP, the vast majority of the relatives supported him – even his wife’s parents, who, as the man writes, even decided to cut contact with the daughter.
The only ones who sided with the author’s soon-to-be-ex were her brother and sister, who scolded the OP for taking it public and ‘humiliating his wife and son.’ To this, the author replied that he doesn’t have a son.
And he said the same to his SIL, who called him a ‘weak, pathetic man.’ Well, soon after that, the author even called the SIL’s husband and angrily declared that everyone in their family is the same, so that guy should also be wary of adultery.
Now the original poster is waiting for the divorce proceedings to begin and doesn’t want to have anything to do with the woman who was by his side for nine years, nor with the child whom he had been raising for his entire life – and who turned out not to be his blood. But the man also decided to enlist the support of netizens at this difficult moment in his life.
Image credits: Drazen Zigic / Freepik (not the actual photo)
An ambiguous story, isn’t it? And most of all, to be honest, it’s the child who is most pitiful here – since he, honestly, isn’t guilty of anything. “Of course, adultery is an absolute reason for any spouses to dissolve their marriage, no matter how many years together are behind them. So here this man can easily be understood,” says Maria Kryvosheeva, a psychologist and NLP coach, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here.
“But there are nuances in the other two aspects of this particular situation. Firstly, it was not worth bringing this out into the public eye. Rage and pain are not the best advisers in any situation, even as difficult as this one.”
“Secondly, the child. I can’t believe that a man whom his wife called ‘a good father‘ can just turn away from a kid who loved him, considering him his own dad. Try explaining to a 5YO all the intricacies of relationships between adults. This can cause the boy serious trauma in the future. So counseling – at least from the point of view of how not to harm the child – will definitely not be superfluous here,” Maria ponders.
People in the comments to the original post were also very divided. No, in everything that concerns cheating and divorce, the responders are sure that the author did the right thing. “I don’t believe it was a one-night stand. It was probably an affair. Anyway you’re right not to stay with a cheater,” some person suspected quite reasonably.
But as for the feelings and life of the little boy, here the commenters mainly condemned the OP for his decision to cut contact. “How easy it was to walk away from a child who was your son for 5 years,” another responder asks a rhetorical question. And what do you, our dear readers, think about this story? Do DNA tests destroy families and human lives – or do people deal with it themselves?
People in the comments were very divided – they feel the man did the right thing by breaking up, but was in the wrong since the kid wasn’t actually guilty here
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What do you think ?
Crystal M 2 months ago
The poor child is the loser here and will be scarred for life, unfortunately.
BeesEelsAndPups 2 months ago
I have a feeling this kid was going to have a c**p life either way. Both the mother and father really suck here. She cheats to get payback on an argument? Either she's nuts, or he's lying. And he's willing to disown his son because of some stupid DNA test? Yes, he's not biologically yours, but you've been his father for five years. How do you let that go? Only if you are a heartless prick already.
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A girl 2 months ago
I'd ditch the wife but maintain a relationship with the child. The child loves him. The wife lied to him. I think the kid is a better bet.
Patrick H 2 months ago
I'm kinda torn. I feel so bad for the kid, but if the guy can abandon the kid that easily, maybe the kid is better off without him. One of the replies suggested therapy to ease the transition, so maybe that could help, but I still the this is going to fúck up that child.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 2 months ago
Is this the same post from a few weeks ago? I hope so because it's disturbing that a father can turn the love of his child off as soon as he finds out it's not based on DNA. Absolutely disgusting human.
Alexandra 2 months ago
It's possible that he still loves the child but it's just too painful to have the child around. Also, that would mean OP would have to be in contact with the cheater. Don't forget, he was cheated on and lied to. Furthermore, if he's around tin any way, cheater might want him to pay some kind of child support. Which she is not entitled to. It's not usual for people to just turn love on and off at the drop of hat. Remember; this is a very volatile situation with lots of legal and financial angles. Of course the sister wants him to take cheater back: otherwise her family has to look after her or her child and I don't think they want to. Let's not forget that the root-cause of all this was OP's wife cheating and then lying to him for years. Perhaps that's what the cheater counted on: let the non-biological father bond with the child so that when he learns the truth, he will still stay because of the child. The child, of course, is the victim in this mess.
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Emie N. 2 months ago
How do people just stop loving their kid suddenly? That's what disturbs me the most.
Becca not Becky 2 months ago
It just proves the love was always conditional. Very sad.
Load More Replies... lenka 2 months ago
The wife is an AH but so is the husband. If he had loved that child when he thought it was his, the love would still be there and would not have just walked away. Sadly more common than we think.
Scott Rackley 2 months ago
You're out of your mind staying with someone who betrayed you in the worst possible way. P**s all the way off.
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Yu Pan 2 months ago
I understand the dad is hurt and sees the boy as a reminder of wife's betrayal. But as an adult, we need to be able to think rationally and separate the hurt and the innocent bystander (boy). I hope when he calms down he'll re engage with the boy, but don't be surprised if in the future the boy resents him. Five years of happy memories and fun time with his boy means less compare to the wife's betrayal. That's a calculation I can't fathom. You have people always asking questions about whether to break up/divorce with their cheating partners but can't find it in them to do it because they love that person, regardless of the length of time they are together. But you also have people like Op, who stops loving a child through no fault of his own.
Marno C. 2 months ago
The grandparents cut off their daughter; have they cut off the grandchild too? The guy here is furious - understandably so - but makes no mention of his feelings towards the child -- it's all about his anger. So, not a good sign. It'd be nice if he could still love the child despite hating the mother, but doesn't sound like he has that in him. So, poor kid is confused why Dad's abandoned him and I am concerned that the grandparents have also taken a powder.
tori Ohno 2 months ago
How can he legally walk away if he signed the paperwork? This is why children are considered the husband's if birthed while married. DNA testing seems to have changed that. She's a loser for cheating, but he's an even bigger one for abandoning a child that he was supposed to have loved. True love can't be erased so easily. This guy has some serious sociopathic tendencies.
Scott Rackley 2 months ago
Legally he can't. As soon as his name was written on the BC, courts do not care after that. She could have had 3 in a row with that affair, he's still screwed.
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Jeolas1 2 months ago
Firstly, if you can from one day to another abandon a child you have been a father to for five years, then you never were a good father to begin with. Secondly, even if your partner cheats on you, if you then call her a wh-re and a b-tch? That tells me you never were a respectful and loving partner, you were always a misogynist and probably at least verbally abusive before. Tell the cheater you feel betrayed, tell them you are angry, tell them you lost all the love you once had for them. And by all means, divorce them! But using abusive language to refer to them, to their face, and to other people's faces, and abandoning the child who thinks of you as their father? YTA.
Doodles1983 2 months ago
I can't help but see it as, a red flag for HIM. To be able to turn off caring about a child he raised as his own for 5 years. Unfortunately, as he is choosing to end the marriage, and leave the child, he can't keep it "between them" or he will be slated for abandoning "his kid". The truth needed to be outed. But how he's doing it? Seems off.
Deborah B 2 months ago
It sucks for OP, sure, and he's certainly well within his rights to divorce, and to be honest about why, but it's cruel on the poor 5 year old to be walked out on by his Dad, biological father or not. Yeah, he should not be on the hook for child support, but how do you just walk away from the kid you raised for five years? I don't think there's any way for the kid not to be incredibly hurt by this.
Mike F 2 months ago
I would almost pay $ to know that myself. It just seems like it's a run of the mill event, "I did a DNA test and found out my son isn't mine", why? What brought about the need for a test to begin with?
Load More Replies... Nimitz 2 months ago
I don't care about the guy or the wife, but I feel terrible for that poor little boy. He did nothing wrong and lost his daddy. The kid will remember this and be sad forever. I wish people gave more of a s**t about the kids in these types of situations. They deserve so much more than being abandoned or weaponized. I'd like to see one of these where the guy fills out adoption papers, has a beautiful conversation with the kid telling them he's always gonna be his dad, regardless of DNA, and that sad as it might be, he and mommy can't be together anymore. To end a marriage is one thing, but to discard a child is cruel and heartbreaking
Otto Katz 2 months ago
If this is in most jurisdictions in the US, he'll still have to pay paternity until the child is 18, or longer if the child goes on to college. He's been the father figure in this boy's life for 5 years. He's not legally able to just drop it now.
Mike F 2 months ago
According to the post, he is not in the US. That's how I understood "no from the US" in one of his replies.
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Caring Panda 2 months ago
That poor child :'( He has been his father and is his father. Biology doesn't only make you a father.
Seán Hannan 2 months ago
OP is a very angry man. I hope he gets the therapy he needs and learns to be a better human being. The kid deserves so much better then the cr@ppy family he was born into.
Rachel Hendricks 2 months ago
He's an AH, name calling and using pejoratives meant to belittle and dehumanize women, not a good pperson.The wife and child actually are better off without him, who needs that kind of abuse? Doesn't mean she was right to cheat, but I'm less likely to judge her reasons based on how he resorted to name calling and insults during that argument, what else has he called her? Tho 5 is young, people forget children are more resilient than often given credit, he will heal, with proper care and understanding, hope they all get counseling.
Guess Undheit 2 months ago
I would have advised him not to get hot under the collar or lash out, and only go public with the paternity test AFTER people start attacking. It's easier to take the moral high ground when (a) you haven't said anything regrettable, and (b) you can say, "here's the paternity test. I kept my mouth shut to save her the embarrassment and questions."
Cadence Thorne 2 months ago
Jesus Christ in a hamster ball, he's got a right to be upset but he sounds UNHINGED
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William Webb 2 months ago
I wouldn't stay with her either I'm divorced many years ago it's like it never happened had 2 boys both are deceased.As for cutting off all ties with the 5 year old that's cruel I think on your part,you're lucky you got a child just because of that test you loved him before get visitation rights and get along with your ex being bitter for life hurts you especially the child.And stop telling people about your ex time to put that behind you because life is too precious for that and move on.
Matt Du 2 months ago
I worked with a guy who showed me a picture of him and his beautiful little daughter that he hadn't seen in 2 years. This girlfriend had been with him for a few weeks when she fell pregnant, She stayed with him, till about a year after the birth, then moved back in with her ex boyfriend. He absolutely doted on his daughter, bought her everything, she was his world. Four years later, the ex and boyfriend wanted to move away and obviously he opposed it and took her to court were she produced a DNA test to prove what she had known from the beginning he was never the father. He now has no rights whatsoever to see his daughter. And just to stick the knife in the court considers he was the father in that time so, she does not have to pay back the child support; a legal avenue he pursued to try and force her to allow visitation rights. She doesn't want him in the child's life and there is nothing he can do.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 2 months ago
Sssuuuppppeeerrr fake lol. Almost comically fake and poorly written. I dont believe any of this pathetic rage bait. If it was real that guy is WAY more of a p.o.s. than the wife. Speaking as someone who was cheated in, marriage over and she had someone elses kid.
Larry Sanguinetti 1 month ago
Relax everyone. The AI that wrote this doesn’t really have a kid or a wife or a sister-in-law. All is okay in the world.
blinkaoa187 2 months ago (edited)
I can understand that op feels intensely betrayed, but if his previous relationship with was good, although I can't help suspect that if he was suspicious enough to do a DNA test, I hope he can find a way to ease the burden on the kid. Being punished by losing the only father you've ever known for something that was in no way under your control would have to be brutal for a kid...
Taffy Renee 2 months ago
I will never understand people who say "Keep it between yourselves". There's no way to hide such a thing.
Lowrider 56 2 months ago
I hate it for the child, he is the one who is going to be hurt the most. And, I can understand why he wouldn't want anything to do with the boy. I'm sure every time he looked at the boy all he could think of was his wife's cheating.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 2 months ago
Very difficult. NTA for leaving the wife as she is dirty cheater, but I have mixed feelings for leaving the six year old kid. Especially as the kid is already seeing you as his father.
Apatheist Account2 2 months ago
Based on what I saw on Judge Judy, BOTH parents have to be present for a DNA test to be valid, so it doesn't seem plausible that he's done this behind his wife's back. I call BS. If it's real - maybe he's not the kid's father, but he is the dad. I can see, though, why he would instantly switch off because the child is the symbol of the infidelity. Certainly a one-night stand just because they had an argument, followed by 5-6 years of lying, is grounds for divorce.
Aline 2 months ago
No one is arguing against divorce in this case. Marriage is an at will contact, in this century you don't need infidelity to get a divorce. Having the ability to flick off a switch and not love a child that you've raised for five years is the disturbing thing. If DNA matters legally, there theoretically could be a chain of custody issues, but they don't both have to be present. Now DNA kits are easy to come by, they aren't just paternity tests, they are ancestry and health products.
Load More Replies... Antonio Fierro 2 months ago
And like always there is a lot of people just thiking about the child's feelings. The only real A here is the Wife. To everyone who is critizicing this guy for leaving them clearly has been brainwashed effectively by all the anti men propaganda out there. One Must come first, the only one who should come before oneself is his blood, and that kid is not his blood.
Captive 2 months ago
Wow all the women here blaming the guy for leaving the boy have clearly no idea what's going on in a man's mind at that moment and beyond. Show some empathy and get down your self righteous horses. It's the wife who cheated and betrayed him, stop blaming the man
Debbie 2 months ago
The child hasn't cheated on him. For the child, he IS his father, he has been his father his whole life! It's chilling how OP can just stop loving and caring about this child.
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Crystal M 2 months ago
The poor child is the loser here and will be scarred for life, unfortunately.
BeesEelsAndPups 2 months ago
I have a feeling this kid was going to have a c**p life either way. Both the mother and father really suck here. She cheats to get payback on an argument? Either she's nuts, or he's lying. And he's willing to disown his son because of some stupid DNA test? Yes, he's not biologically yours, but you've been his father for five years. How do you let that go? Only if you are a heartless prick already.
Load More Replies... A girl 2 months ago
I'd ditch the wife but maintain a relationship with the child. The child loves him. The wife lied to him. I think the kid is a better bet.
Patrick H 2 months ago
I'm kinda torn. I feel so bad for the kid, but if the guy can abandon the kid that easily, maybe the kid is better off without him. One of the replies suggested therapy to ease the transition, so maybe that could help, but I still the this is going to fúck up that child.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 2 months ago
Is this the same post from a few weeks ago? I hope so because it's disturbing that a father can turn the love of his child off as soon as he finds out it's not based on DNA. Absolutely disgusting human.
Alexandra 2 months ago
It's possible that he still loves the child but it's just too painful to have the child around. Also, that would mean OP would have to be in contact with the cheater. Don't forget, he was cheated on and lied to. Furthermore, if he's around tin any way, cheater might want him to pay some kind of child support. Which she is not entitled to. It's not usual for people to just turn love on and off at the drop of hat. Remember; this is a very volatile situation with lots of legal and financial angles. Of course the sister wants him to take cheater back: otherwise her family has to look after her or her child and I don't think they want to. Let's not forget that the root-cause of all this was OP's wife cheating and then lying to him for years. Perhaps that's what the cheater counted on: let the non-biological father bond with the child so that when he learns the truth, he will still stay because of the child. The child, of course, is the victim in this mess.
Load More Replies... Emie N. 2 months ago
How do people just stop loving their kid suddenly? That's what disturbs me the most.
Becca not Becky 2 months ago
It just proves the love was always conditional. Very sad.
Load More Replies... lenka 2 months ago
The wife is an AH but so is the husband. If he had loved that child when he thought it was his, the love would still be there and would not have just walked away. Sadly more common than we think.
Scott Rackley 2 months ago
You're out of your mind staying with someone who betrayed you in the worst possible way. P**s all the way off.
Load More Replies... Yu Pan 2 months ago
I understand the dad is hurt and sees the boy as a reminder of wife's betrayal. But as an adult, we need to be able to think rationally and separate the hurt and the innocent bystander (boy). I hope when he calms down he'll re engage with the boy, but don't be surprised if in the future the boy resents him. Five years of happy memories and fun time with his boy means less compare to the wife's betrayal. That's a calculation I can't fathom. You have people always asking questions about whether to break up/divorce with their cheating partners but can't find it in them to do it because they love that person, regardless of the length of time they are together. But you also have people like Op, who stops loving a child through no fault of his own.
Marno C. 2 months ago
The grandparents cut off their daughter; have they cut off the grandchild too? The guy here is furious - understandably so - but makes no mention of his feelings towards the child -- it's all about his anger. So, not a good sign. It'd be nice if he could still love the child despite hating the mother, but doesn't sound like he has that in him. So, poor kid is confused why Dad's abandoned him and I am concerned that the grandparents have also taken a powder.
tori Ohno 2 months ago
How can he legally walk away if he signed the paperwork? This is why children are considered the husband's if birthed while married. DNA testing seems to have changed that. She's a loser for cheating, but he's an even bigger one for abandoning a child that he was supposed to have loved. True love can't be erased so easily. This guy has some serious sociopathic tendencies.
Scott Rackley 2 months ago
Legally he can't. As soon as his name was written on the BC, courts do not care after that. She could have had 3 in a row with that affair, he's still screwed.
Load More Replies... Jeolas1 2 months ago
Firstly, if you can from one day to another abandon a child you have been a father to for five years, then you never were a good father to begin with. Secondly, even if your partner cheats on you, if you then call her a wh-re and a b-tch? That tells me you never were a respectful and loving partner, you were always a misogynist and probably at least verbally abusive before. Tell the cheater you feel betrayed, tell them you are angry, tell them you lost all the love you once had for them. And by all means, divorce them! But using abusive language to refer to them, to their face, and to other people's faces, and abandoning the child who thinks of you as their father? YTA.
Doodles1983 2 months ago
I can't help but see it as, a red flag for HIM. To be able to turn off caring about a child he raised as his own for 5 years. Unfortunately, as he is choosing to end the marriage, and leave the child, he can't keep it "between them" or he will be slated for abandoning "his kid". The truth needed to be outed. But how he's doing it? Seems off.
Deborah B 2 months ago
It sucks for OP, sure, and he's certainly well within his rights to divorce, and to be honest about why, but it's cruel on the poor 5 year old to be walked out on by his Dad, biological father or not. Yeah, he should not be on the hook for child support, but how do you just walk away from the kid you raised for five years? I don't think there's any way for the kid not to be incredibly hurt by this.
Mike F 2 months ago
I would almost pay $ to know that myself. It just seems like it's a run of the mill event, "I did a DNA test and found out my son isn't mine", why? What brought about the need for a test to begin with?
Load More Replies... Nimitz 2 months ago
I don't care about the guy or the wife, but I feel terrible for that poor little boy. He did nothing wrong and lost his daddy. The kid will remember this and be sad forever. I wish people gave more of a s**t about the kids in these types of situations. They deserve so much more than being abandoned or weaponized. I'd like to see one of these where the guy fills out adoption papers, has a beautiful conversation with the kid telling them he's always gonna be his dad, regardless of DNA, and that sad as it might be, he and mommy can't be together anymore. To end a marriage is one thing, but to discard a child is cruel and heartbreaking
Otto Katz 2 months ago
If this is in most jurisdictions in the US, he'll still have to pay paternity until the child is 18, or longer if the child goes on to college. He's been the father figure in this boy's life for 5 years. He's not legally able to just drop it now.
Mike F 2 months ago
According to the post, he is not in the US. That's how I understood "no from the US" in one of his replies.
Load More Replies... Caring Panda 2 months ago
That poor child :'( He has been his father and is his father. Biology doesn't only make you a father.
Seán Hannan 2 months ago
OP is a very angry man. I hope he gets the therapy he needs and learns to be a better human being. The kid deserves so much better then the cr@ppy family he was born into.
Rachel Hendricks 2 months ago
He's an AH, name calling and using pejoratives meant to belittle and dehumanize women, not a good pperson.The wife and child actually are better off without him, who needs that kind of abuse? Doesn't mean she was right to cheat, but I'm less likely to judge her reasons based on how he resorted to name calling and insults during that argument, what else has he called her? Tho 5 is young, people forget children are more resilient than often given credit, he will heal, with proper care and understanding, hope they all get counseling.
Guess Undheit 2 months ago
I would have advised him not to get hot under the collar or lash out, and only go public with the paternity test AFTER people start attacking. It's easier to take the moral high ground when (a) you haven't said anything regrettable, and (b) you can say, "here's the paternity test. I kept my mouth shut to save her the embarrassment and questions."
Cadence Thorne 2 months ago
Jesus Christ in a hamster ball, he's got a right to be upset but he sounds UNHINGED
Load More Replies... William Webb 2 months ago
I wouldn't stay with her either I'm divorced many years ago it's like it never happened had 2 boys both are deceased.As for cutting off all ties with the 5 year old that's cruel I think on your part,you're lucky you got a child just because of that test you loved him before get visitation rights and get along with your ex being bitter for life hurts you especially the child.And stop telling people about your ex time to put that behind you because life is too precious for that and move on.
Matt Du 2 months ago
I worked with a guy who showed me a picture of him and his beautiful little daughter that he hadn't seen in 2 years. This girlfriend had been with him for a few weeks when she fell pregnant, She stayed with him, till about a year after the birth, then moved back in with her ex boyfriend. He absolutely doted on his daughter, bought her everything, she was his world. Four years later, the ex and boyfriend wanted to move away and obviously he opposed it and took her to court were she produced a DNA test to prove what she had known from the beginning he was never the father. He now has no rights whatsoever to see his daughter. And just to stick the knife in the court considers he was the father in that time so, she does not have to pay back the child support; a legal avenue he pursued to try and force her to allow visitation rights. She doesn't want him in the child's life and there is nothing he can do.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 2 months ago
Sssuuuppppeeerrr fake lol. Almost comically fake and poorly written. I dont believe any of this pathetic rage bait. If it was real that guy is WAY more of a p.o.s. than the wife. Speaking as someone who was cheated in, marriage over and she had someone elses kid.
Larry Sanguinetti 1 month ago
Relax everyone. The AI that wrote this doesn’t really have a kid or a wife or a sister-in-law. All is okay in the world.
blinkaoa187 2 months ago (edited)
I can understand that op feels intensely betrayed, but if his previous relationship with was good, although I can't help suspect that if he was suspicious enough to do a DNA test, I hope he can find a way to ease the burden on the kid. Being punished by losing the only father you've ever known for something that was in no way under your control would have to be brutal for a kid...
Taffy Renee 2 months ago
I will never understand people who say "Keep it between yourselves". There's no way to hide such a thing.
Lowrider 56 2 months ago
I hate it for the child, he is the one who is going to be hurt the most. And, I can understand why he wouldn't want anything to do with the boy. I'm sure every time he looked at the boy all he could think of was his wife's cheating.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 2 months ago
Very difficult. NTA for leaving the wife as she is dirty cheater, but I have mixed feelings for leaving the six year old kid. Especially as the kid is already seeing you as his father.
Apatheist Account2 2 months ago
Based on what I saw on Judge Judy, BOTH parents have to be present for a DNA test to be valid, so it doesn't seem plausible that he's done this behind his wife's back. I call BS. If it's real - maybe he's not the kid's father, but he is the dad. I can see, though, why he would instantly switch off because the child is the symbol of the infidelity. Certainly a one-night stand just because they had an argument, followed by 5-6 years of lying, is grounds for divorce.
Aline 2 months ago
No one is arguing against divorce in this case. Marriage is an at will contact, in this century you don't need infidelity to get a divorce. Having the ability to flick off a switch and not love a child that you've raised for five years is the disturbing thing. If DNA matters legally, there theoretically could be a chain of custody issues, but they don't both have to be present. Now DNA kits are easy to come by, they aren't just paternity tests, they are ancestry and health products.
Load More Replies... Antonio Fierro 2 months ago
And like always there is a lot of people just thiking about the child's feelings. The only real A here is the Wife. To everyone who is critizicing this guy for leaving them clearly has been brainwashed effectively by all the anti men propaganda out there. One Must come first, the only one who should come before oneself is his blood, and that kid is not his blood.
Captive 2 months ago
Wow all the women here blaming the guy for leaving the boy have clearly no idea what's going on in a man's mind at that moment and beyond. Show some empathy and get down your self righteous horses. It's the wife who cheated and betrayed him, stop blaming the man
Debbie 2 months ago
The child hasn't cheated on him. For the child, he IS his father, he has been his father his whole life! It's chilling how OP can just stop loving and caring about this child.
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