She admitted she knew she broke it, as she felt it when it snapped. But instead of fessing up, she covered it with pillows and said nothing. She should at least pay half, if not all, the replacement cost.

Honestly the weight issue is completely irrelevant here. The friend should have owned up to breaking the couch and at the very least offered to help pay for a new one, if not completely cover the cost. I do however question how high quality of a couch it is. Typically when one sleeps on a couch they lay across the whole thing, so the weight distribution would be similar to multiple smaller people sitting on the couch.

$1500 is not a high quality couch, maybe "mid" as the kids say. My 70 pound dog broke the arm off my $1200 couch 10+ years ago, and my father in law flipped it over, went inside, and nailed it back together. It's still serviceable. This is what OP should do, maybe with an extra board.

One of the comments says she will cut ties with the friend as the friend didn't know how to tell her she'd broken it...this is not a strong friendship. The op sounds like a c**t. What kind of friends do you dump because of that? Maybe she can't tell you things because your reaction is so extreme.

Being about 6'4", I weigh a lot more than the average person, and I've always had to be careful how I place my weight. If I had declined the safe option offered me (the air mattress) and insisted on the couch, I would feel a greater responsibility since it was my decision and my preference. And I certainly would have informed my hostess even if I clearly had no responsibility.

If two 200lb people sat on it ant the same time and it broke would she ask them to pay?

She knew she broke it, she didn't tell you and covered it up, I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who treated me with such disrespect, ask for a contribution to the cost of replacement and then cut ties before she ruins any of your other possessions with her entitled views.

I think the issue here isn't the weight, but her being dishonest about it.

And that's why we have something like a responsibility insurance. Only costs a small fee and is for if you damage something outside your own house. That's also why we can't sue eachother to oblivion like in the US

I don’t get the comment that went ‘I broke a chair once and I was 125 lbs - I think the problem is your couch’. How are those two things comparable? And none of this is ‘fat-shaming’ - as usual, many of the comments are insane. Frankly if I broke someone’s couch, I’d definitely mention it, and at least offer to pay whatever I could towards a replacement, especially if whoever owned the couch had been looking after me as much as OP had.

My dad's joke when I started being a serial breaker of futons was "shear forces, huh?" (I could have flung him into the sun, except he was teaching me how to mend it.) A couch needs to be tough enough for 350 lbs worth of people having vigorous sex on it because you KNOW it's going to happen. If not at your house, at the house of whoever picks it off your curb. Not 350lbs sitting still, but 350 bouncing and smashing, ok? That is a LOT more strain than a 400lb person lying down (distributing their weight) peacefully. That couch was defective. Unfortunately, furniture be like that these days. Go to the Habitat Restore and get something old. Look at the underpinnings. Now take all the money you saved, go to Joann, and buy some clearance upholstery fabric. Take it to an upholsterer. There. Got yourself a vintage couch that will double as a bunker in certain disaster situations.

So no one here has ever done something accidentally that was absolutely mortifying and they needed some time to process how to deal with it (including letting her host know)? Maybe the friend would have told her in a day or so, once she figured it out, including figuring out if/what she can contribute to fix it. I don't see this as a case of outright lying and deceit and intention to harm. But, everyone has their own opinion.

Well, she knew her friend's weight and still had her sleep on that couch. She should have refused to host her or tell her to bring an appropriate air mattress. Unless the friend jumped around around the couch, I would not make them pay.

Its wild to me that someone would pay $1500 and not get Insurance. Any Appliances or furniture I get I always add it on. Because s**t happens.

The decent thing her friend could've done was at least be honest and brought it to her attention and offer to pay full on or partially. That's what I would have done if I knew I broke the couch. Whether the couch was cheap or well made shouldn't even matter.

If what broke was one piece of wood, that's probably a pretty straightforward fix. I would look for a general handyman to come look at it and see if they can do it; a furniture repair specialist will charge more. (Actually I would start by looking if I can figure something out, but if repair didn't even occur to this person as an option, they probably want to skip right to professional assistance.)

I tend to plop myself down on couches & they can break.

If OP can get into the couch to determine what broke, odds are that it can be fixed. Boards can be replaced or reinforced and fabric can be stitched. I would do it myself, though OP may not be as self-reliant and could hire a handyman. A couch that expensive should be able to hold that weight better than this. Bill the woman for repairs and materials and call it a day.

I’m on the fence here ! One me sitting on won’t break lol n I’m not big I add but Yes she did wrong by hiding the fact she knew she broke it now that would p**s me right off I loath liars n that’s what she did basically lied by omission yes she’s obese but Other side of the fence here a 1500$ sofa should not be that s**t it breaks so easy oh n who spends that on a sofa in the real world anyway I’m in uk bought a new sofa first new one in 20 yrs after a divorce 13 yr ago now on my own with the kids 500 quid in a sale made to order it’s strong as comfy n lush n I have large dogs as jump on it does it break no have any of my sofas in my 60 years ever broken also no ! So you are the ah here for your attitude towards her over it ! She is better off with out u as a mate ! n next time get a decent sofa not a cheap tacky pos that u where ripped off over in first place but as someone else said they repaired one I’m sure it could be and also look on home insurance to mines covered on mine 🤷‍

The whole sofa thing aside? Why do people always suggest "Have a cup of tea/coffee"? I'm sensitive to caffeine, I can have a little bit but if I have too much? I get a migraine... Which would add to the drama fun! 😄 I would suggest offering water, caffeine can accelerate your heart rate, it's a stimulant which is why people have a cup of coffee to wake up. Caffeine may make their anxiety about the situation worse... Plus Dr Mannix advising against use of the term "at least"? It depends on what you've said to them beforehand. I've said it to try and lighten the mood... "Well... At least you're here and we're getting it sorted out... It's not good but it could be worse... At least we're not under attack by zombies or something!"... I guess? Just try and be as calming as possible. Say "I understand" and a friend who knows you, how you are? They won't take offence during a horrible occurrence when we can likely blurt out something that can sound insensitive, but do explain straight away.

OP is beyond an ah. She's a straight b.