When I arrive at my parents’ house after traveling halfway across the world to visit for the holidays, I exhale a huge sigh of relief. Finally, I am somewhere I feel safe and cared for, and I always enjoy the most restful sleep that I’ve had in months. There’s just something magical about that bed! But unfortunately, that’s not everyone’s experience during the holiday season.

One woman recently reached out to Reddit for advice after finding herself in a difficult situation with her boyfriend’s family. After years of being forced to sleep on an air mattress during the week of Thanksgiving, she decided that she’s had enough. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as a conversation with the post’s author. 

This woman was excited to finally sleep in a comfortable bed at her boyfriend’s parents’ house

Image credits: namii9 / freepik (not the actual photo)

But before she arrived, she was informed that the first come, first serve rule was no longer being respected

Image credits: alidrian / freepik (not the actual photo)

Image credits: One-Street5122

Later, the woman responded to several readers and provided more information about the situation

Surviving the holidays with your partner’s family can be challenging

Image credits: gpointstudio / freepik (not the actual photo)

The holidays are supposed to be a time of relaxation and reflection. You should be sitting around the fireplace with your loved ones, enjoying a comforting meal and catching up on what’s happened in your lives this year. Work should be the last thing on your mind, and your stress should melt away like the butter on your Thanksgiving mashed potatoes.

Unfortunately, however, we all know that that’s not how the holidays will actually go for many of us. Family drama often interferes with enjoying these special days, and it’s hard to savor a slice of pumpkin pie when your uncle wants to have a political debate over dessert. And of course, the holidays can be even more challenging when you’re spending them with someone else’s family.

To find out more about this situation, we got in touch with the post’s author, Reddit user One-Street5122, who was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda. She actually just posted an update with even more details, which can be found here.

As far as what she thought of the replies to her post, the OP said she appreciated the comments, as she feared that she was overreacting. “But based on most comments, I was under reacting, which was a surprise to me,” she shared.

We were also curious as to why no one in the family ever offered to stay in a hotel or Airbnb. “As I address in my update, the big driving factor in no hotel (other than the parents not wanting that) is that each evening, until late into the night, all the kids play board games and drink,” the author explained. “Where they live, the closest hotel is about an hour away, and there are no Ubers.”

But apparently, it’s not surprising that Jack and Jill created an issue around the beds. “Everyone has had conflicts with Jack and Jill in the family,” One-Street5122 revealed. “We ended up having the air mattress in Luke and Millie’s room since they offered.”

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Millie also requested two nights in a row that they could all play board games in Jack and Jill’s room, as their room was larger and wasn’t already crowded with things and an air mattress. But the couple refused.

It’s always a good idea to mentally prepare yourself for uncomfortable encounters

Image credits: lifestock / freepik (not the actual photo)

When it comes to surviving the holidays with your partner’s family, your first instinct might be to fake an illness or indulge in a little too much wine. But The Zoe Report got in touch with some experts to find out some healthier tactics for staying sane. First, they recommend following your instincts. If you began to feel hesitant the moment you received an invitation to Thanksgiving, don’t ignore what your gut is telling you.

Imagine how you’ll actually feel showing up to the gathering and spending an entire day there, and if you’re dreading it, it might be a sign that you should decline. However, if you’re definitely planning on going, psychotherapist Tina B. Tessina, PhD, recommends anticipating any challenges that may pop up during the celebration.

Does your partner’s mom always criticize your cooking? Will your partner’s aunt badger you about why you’re not pregnant yet? Or will their father ask how much money you’ve saved this year? If you are prepared for all of these uncomfortable situations, you can be mentally prepared to let them roll off your back. Plus, you might even be able to come up with responses ahead of time or safer topics to switch the conversation to if need be.

It’s also a good idea to go into the event in a great headspace. Repeating positive affirmations to yourself can help you feel calm and centered before the chaos begins. And if you need to set boundaries with relatives, don’t be afraid to enforce them. Just remember to remain cordial, even if someone has been rude to you. You don’t want to spark family drama or escalate a situation if it will turn your partner’s entire family against you.

Finally, The Zoe Report recommends making sure that you have access to your support system before and after the holiday. Schedule an appointment with your therapist, make plans with your best friend or schedule a phone call with your sister. If you need to vent after it’s all said and done, you’ll feel relieved to know that you have someone with your best interest at heart waiting to talk to you.

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We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this woman did anything wrong by standing up for her right to have a comfortable bed? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda piece featuring family drama during the holidays, look no further than right here!

Some readers took the author’s side and suggested that she and her boyfriend enjoy Thanksgiving in their own home

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However, others thought that all parties had made questionable decisions

Some even called out the woman for accepting the air mattress for multiple years in a row

And some thought it was unfair for the author to behave this way as a guest in someone else’s home

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