We all want our partners to be there for us, especially when we’re going through a rough time. Having that sort of trust and support is vital for any healthy relationship. Being able to lean on your significant other provides a security that’s deeply comforting.

The woman in the following story that goes by the username @Acrobatic_Cup3962 faced quite a dilemma related to this matter. She asked for her boyfriend’s help after she was surprised by an unexpected period. With a tight schedule at hand, she was hoping he could provide some assistance in helping her manage her day. And while she wasn’t expecting much, his response really disappointed her. Scroll down below to read the whole story and what Kellie Leonard, a biomedical scientist, had to say about it.

Having a partner that you can trust is crucial for a successful relationship

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

The woman in the following story hoped she could rely on her boyfriend when she needed his help. However, he was quick to disappoint her

Image credits: Polina Zimmerman (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Acrobatic_Cup3962

Image credits: Austin Guevara (not the actual photo)

“Cultural attitudes require women to maintain a level of secrecy and silence regarding menstruation, contributing to the production and compliance of menstrual shame,” says biomedical scientist Kellie Leonard. “In total 42% of women have experienced period shame, with one in five developing these feelings due to a male friend.”

“Menstruation is a natural bodily function of over 50% of the world’s population, it allows us to create new life and is a huge part of a woman’s lifespan. Yet women are consistently shamed into hiding tampons and pads from loved ones, along with cancelling activities and even education.”

What’s more, is that period symptoms are impacted by the relationships women have in their lives, especially their partner. “Studies have shown that a woman’s social support system can not only affect her mental health but also cause period pain and unwanted symptoms to be elevated. This shows just how important it is for open communication surrounding period symptoms for the women’s overall health and well-being.”

Men and boys need more education on periods

The study on male attitude towards periods points out that menstruating is always presented as natural yet at the same time as something that needs to be hidden from men and boys. From a young age, girls are taught to believe that periods are something you only talk to women about. No surprise that research found that many girls don’t feel at ease talking about menstruating to their fathers. Furthermore, boys barely get any information at all, both from their fathers and mothers.

This avoidance results in a gap of knowledge that further perpetuates the stigma around periods. Men feel uncomfortable talking about and dealing with periods because all their lives they’ve seen everyone around them being uncomfortable with it. When they finally meet a woman that isn’t afraid to talk about menstruating and their feeling surrounding the subject, they get awkward. For them, it seems unusual to be so confident about periods.

“At the heart of this is a problematic cycle where menstruation is viewed as the purview of women, so men are perceived as being uncomfortable with the topic. It is also seen as unimportant to educate men about menstruation in much detail because it is not something they are expected to deal with. This lack of knowledge can contribute to stereotypical beliefs, negative attitudes, and general discomfort. This cycle needs to be interrupted,” the study concludes.

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

Talking to your partner about your period can help

Like it is in many cases, the solution here is education. More people should talk openly about periods so that the conversation wouldn’t feel so shameful. Even the redditor in the story was a little hesitant to talk about it at first, which shows that it is difficult to shed the stigma.

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If you notice that your partner is uncomfortable with periods, set yourself up for greatness and have a period talk with them. “The best way to have a period talk with your partner is by explaining a bit about your menstrual health,” recommends Leonard. “It might be that your partner simply does not know a lot about periods therefore, explaining the science can go a long way to help someone understand.”

Then, move on form the technical lingo and lean into your personal experience: How does it feel? What symptoms do you personally experience? How does it impact your day? Be sure to describe how your typical period week looks like so that your partner is aware of what to expect. “It’s also important to convey exactly what you require from them at this time so that they can better help you,” Leonard adds.

So, if you are a woman who’s in a similar situation, the only thing we can suggest is having patience for the person you love. However, also remember that you do not owe anyone any explanations or education, so if levelling with your partner about it is not acceptable to you, you’re always free to walk away from the relationship, just like the woman did in this story.

Many redditors agreed with the woman and shared examples of the proper ways men deal with periods

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