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Guy Shocked That His ‘Lesson’ For GF Ends In A Breakup, Gets A Reality Check
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Guy Shocked That His ‘Lesson’ For GF Ends In A Breakup, Gets A Reality Check

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Mutual respect is a cornerstone of any proper relationship. If you plan on making things work in the long run, you need to show your partner that you’re always in their corner. For some people, the line between playfulness and meanness can be hard to grasp.

Reddit user u/foodgoose773 faced a lot of criticism from the AITA online community after sharing how he taught his (now ex) girlfriend a ‘lesson.’ The author felt embarrassed that she was driving him to work while wearing her pajamas, so he wanted to humiliate her. Scroll down to see how the internet reacted to the story. Bored Panda reached out to the author via Reddit for comment.

Couples need to find a way to be on the same page. If they’re constantly facing off against each other, the relationship is going to suffer

Image credits:  FabrikaPhoto/Envato elements (not the actual photo)

One guy got a lot of flak online after sharing how he insulted his girlfriend who was driving him to work in her pajamas

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The author answered a few questions and shared some updates on what happened next

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Image credits: sergign/Envato elements (not the actual photo)

Image credits: foodgoose773

Anyone who constantly works against their partner needs to rethink how they approach their relationship

Image credits: peus80/Envato elements (not the actual photo)

It’s one thing to gently poke fun at your partner. Lightly teasing someone, being playful, and embracing humor all help keep the spark alive in long-term committed relationships.

However, it’s a whole different ball game if there’s some malicious intent behind your actions. For example, if your goal is to humiliate your partner or if you insult them, then there’s something wrong with the relationship.

You should be on the same team, not playing against each other. If you catch yourself being mean and hurtful for no good reason, it might be time to slow down and spend some time working on yourself.

If you can, try to figure out the reasons why you want to punish your partner instead of accepting them ‘as they are.’ If you feel like you can’t talk about these sensitive issues openly with them, you could always try seeing a therapist. They’re trained professionals, so they might offer you some insights into your behavior and how to move past it.

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But make no mistake—therapy doesn’t involve someone waving a magic wand to make all of your problems go away. It’s guidance that requires you to put in the hard, emotionally uncomfortable work.

Nobody is ‘perfect.’ Everyone has their own flaws. Learning to accept that about ourselves, as well as our partners, is a mark of maturity. That being said, we should also be willing to work on our weaknesses and improve as individuals. Not just for ourselves, but for our loved ones, too. That takes self-awareness, humility, and the desire to grow.

It helps if you keep an eye out for potential relationship red flags

Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages/Envato elements (not the actual photo)

Psychiatrist Abigail Brenner, M.D., notes that irresponsibility, immaturity, and unpredictability are some of the main red flags in relationships.

“Some people have trouble mastering basic life skills—taking care of themselves, managing their finances and personal space, holding onto a job, and making plans for their life and future,” she explains.

From her perspective, these people are often unreliable and are surrounded by small crises that can sap your time and energy.

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Some other major indicators that someone might be troublesome to date include an unwillingness to communicate, a lack of trust, and controlling behavior. Meanwhile, if you find that many of the people in your social circle dislike your partner, they might be seeing something that you’re blind to.

If your partner is overly secretive about their past, constantly blames others for their problems, has a lot of insecurities, and reacts to situations with lots of anger, you have your work cut out for you.

Of course, red flags don’t definitively mean that the relationship won’t work out. They’re indicators that there are going to be difficulties ahead and that your needs might suffer at the expense of your partner.

Many of us have at least some small behavioral red flags. What matters is the willingness to work on oneself, to admit it when we’re wrong, and to take responsibility to communicate openly, without lashing out in frustration in weird ways.

What did you think of the author’s story, Pandas? What would you have done if you were in his or his (ex) girlfriend’s shoes? How do you find the line between playfulness and meanness? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.

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The author was almost universally criticized on the internet. Here’s what some readers told him

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The guy later shared how he wanted to move back in with his girlfriend, who dumped, him

The internet wasn’t in the mood to feel overly supportive of the author

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Jonas Grinevičius

Jonas Grinevičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

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Jonas Grinevičius

Jonas Grinevičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

Read less »

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love a good weight-loss story. The GF must be feeling very light on her feet, now that she's dumped the excess weight.

SheamusFanFrom1987
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is this ding-dumbbell even for real???!!! He still doesn't think he's the A-wipe after all this???!!! Plus he has the cheek to try and take legal action???!!! Please, I beg of you, do so! I'd love the comedy when your case doesn't just get kicked out but hurled out like a proverbial discus. God, I'm embarrassed that we share the same Y-chromosome. Don't take this the wrong way, but if my GF was driving me anywhere, I couldn't care less if she was wearing pajamas or a fur coat (weather permitting of course), she is already doing me a favour by saving me gas and maintenance (and my job is at least 80% driving). So if I have to pump the gas, I'm filling 'er up! Sheeeeeeeeeeeshhhhhhh!!! -_-"

Vvee Work
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Any woman with common sense would have left you're dumbass....you admitted she didn't even get out of the car when she picked you up,it's not like your co workers are were going to violently gallop to the car and look through windows and start fighting each other like a bunch of horny male deer....aww..."ThE wInDoWs WaSnT tInTeD"....it's not like you live in Iraq,you don't have any rights to treat her like that ya moron,what was supposed to be learnt from your "lesson"?,the only lesson there is when she left you lmfao and that was rightly deserved,she not only dodged a bullet but she dodged the whole damn calvary,and I'm glad she did because you're a controlling,jealous,lying and narcissistic childish piece of btch....that's what you are.....you came in like a whole btch and got left like a piece of btch

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love a good weight-loss story. The GF must be feeling very light on her feet, now that she's dumped the excess weight.

SheamusFanFrom1987
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is this ding-dumbbell even for real???!!! He still doesn't think he's the A-wipe after all this???!!! Plus he has the cheek to try and take legal action???!!! Please, I beg of you, do so! I'd love the comedy when your case doesn't just get kicked out but hurled out like a proverbial discus. God, I'm embarrassed that we share the same Y-chromosome. Don't take this the wrong way, but if my GF was driving me anywhere, I couldn't care less if she was wearing pajamas or a fur coat (weather permitting of course), she is already doing me a favour by saving me gas and maintenance (and my job is at least 80% driving). So if I have to pump the gas, I'm filling 'er up! Sheeeeeeeeeeeshhhhhhh!!! -_-"

Vvee Work
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Any woman with common sense would have left you're dumbass....you admitted she didn't even get out of the car when she picked you up,it's not like your co workers are were going to violently gallop to the car and look through windows and start fighting each other like a bunch of horny male deer....aww..."ThE wInDoWs WaSnT tInTeD"....it's not like you live in Iraq,you don't have any rights to treat her like that ya moron,what was supposed to be learnt from your "lesson"?,the only lesson there is when she left you lmfao and that was rightly deserved,she not only dodged a bullet but she dodged the whole damn calvary,and I'm glad she did because you're a controlling,jealous,lying and narcissistic childish piece of btch....that's what you are.....you came in like a whole btch and got left like a piece of btch

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