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If someone was Muslim and made halal food for their spouse only for the spouse to insist they HAD to eat pork with it to feel full, everyone would see how he's just being stubborn. This is clearly important to her to just enjoy an animal product-free meal with her spouse. I already said she's also being stubborn, because she could just as easily make the tofu. So it feels like it's a test to see if he loves her enough to eat her food her way. AND YET he also clearly doesn't love her or respect her views enough to do that. So as the previous commenter said: totally incompatible worldviews.

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You can't take the morality issue away. That's literally the issue she's seeking emotional support for! From a meat eater's perspective, of course it makes sense to say "our diets are equal" but from hers it does not. Just like it would not be supportive of your Muslim pr Jewish partner to eat non halal or non kosher foods during their pristine meal.

Aaand there it is. THIS right here is why my original comment was that their VALUES do not align. It's not about who cooks tofu. She is demonstrating that her VALUES, are more important to her than their relationship. Which is totally fine. But she needs to be honest about that and just tell him she doesn't want to live with a carnivore. I have Jewish friends who keep kosher. When I cook for them, I prepare kosher. I also have muslim friends, and when I cook for them I prepare halal. I have vegetarian friends... same thing. The key thing here about our MUTUALLY SUPPORTIVE relationship is that they DO NOT expect me to eat kosher/halal/vegetarian simply because they do. They have their belief and I respect that. I have mine and they respect that - which is a very key difference. A muslim/jewish/christian/athiest/vegan friend who criticizes my beliefs, who thinks their moral judgements are better/more important than me and who and expects ME to adhere to THIER beliefs is not supporting me

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Lenka, maybe, maybe not. I think if people could stop worrying about being judged for a second they could see that the message she's likely getting from him is: "Your food/diet isn't good enough for me." I've been married for a lot of years and I have messed up my fair share of meals, but my spouse has never had the audacity to plop a whole 'nother dish of his own making on the table to drive the point home.

He isnt 'plopping a whole nother dish'. He is adding protein to the dish she makes. And you are right... the message she is getting is that the diet is not good enough, because it is not. It's not meeting his dietary needs. He doesnt tell us what he does for work, whether he is in an office, or is a laborer, or goes to the gym. What we do know is that meal is not meeting his dietary needs. He does not criticize or judge her. He does not expect her to cook meat for him. He is simply adding a protien so he is not hungry. Vegan or not, that is an entirely reasonable approach for him to take, though I suspect if it was tofu there would be no complaint. I am not vegan bashing. I was raised very strict vegetarian/vegan light (not strict vegan, we were allowed honey and eggs from our own chickens). I honestly think in this scenario she expects him to become vegan and has not communicated that honestly and clearly to him. Their values do not align.

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*Sigh* whatever, lenka.

You don't get to force your values on your spouse and then assume you are in the right. How you think it is moral or ethical to force your own diet on your significant other is beyond me, but you sound controlling and selfish. He accommodates for her, she does not accommodate for him, she is TA. Him being considerate is somehow to you a sign that he isn't because it's not enough to be considerate, you have to capitulate to your significant other's demands on your diet? Okay, does that work in reverse? What if it was very important for him to eat meat? In your own ridiculous examples what if someone had a religious observation of eating pork? Would the Jewish spouse be disrespectful for abstaining? Foolish. Your perspective is foolish.

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There's no point in talking to you, because you've closed your mind. If you're willing to be civil and open-minded, let me know. Stop wasting people's time otherwise.

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I disagree with you (at least on your first comment), but you shouldn't have negative downvotes. You're contributing a well formed opinion that's on topic to the discussion. Upvoted.

No she is acting like a typical vegan AH who thinks their diet is superior and won't tolerate other viewpoints. OPs girlfriend is an AH and so is Terra Cotta, which is probably why she sees no problem with this

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Thanks, Mine, I appreciate that!