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“If You Saw Her You Would Understand”: 50 Hilarious And Unhinged Reasons Someone Cheated
Interview With Expert
Generally, our societies condemn cheaters. But we still usually give them the opportunity to explain themselves, which can impact how harshly they are judged. Take responsibility, show that you understand the effect your actions had on others, and you might be forgiven faster. However, some excuses raise more questions than they answer. So, we searched the internet far and wide, and compiled a list of the most ridiculous arguments people used to justify their infidelity. Were any of these legit? Perhaps, who knows? But they sounded weird nonetheless.
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#1
How about “ it’s your fault cause you haven’t been meeting my needs” and you know he wasn’t working and I was working 2 jobs and pregnant with his baby.
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#2
"I just haven't been in a good head space since my grandma died" we were 21 his grandma died when he was 7
#3
"We're engaged, but it's not like we're dating" 35 yrs later and I'm still confused by that statement.
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
So if you got married that is even more reason to cheat? Is that how it works?
#4
My ex told me that the hickey on his hip was from a ghost because my house was haunted
#5
Mine cheated on me cus he didn’t want to ask for money and was hungry and the girl worked at little Caesars. I replied so she was also hot and ready?
#6
"I forgot we were exclusive" we lived together
Nice Beast Ludo 21 hours ago
I need references. These have to be made up. Seem extremely rushed, vague and completely implausible
#7
"You were holding me back from the navy" after we broke up he didn't join the navy... He started working at a SMOKE SHOP
#8
"You're pregnant and I'm stressed about it"
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
And the only stress relief is finding another socket for your rocket?
#9
"If you saw her you would understand"
MotherRobinson 19 hours ago
Just WTF. That's such a great self esteem booster. What a Douchbag
#10
He told me "well you were at college doing better for yourself so I did better for myself too!" we were done right then
#13
He said I kid you not "I lost my sock and I was in distress"
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
Losing a sock meant you lost some traction and fell penis first into a woman? Could happen to any of us.
#15
My ex husband said he was stressed because I lost my job. I was out of work for one month! I had been back to work for months!
#16
He resented me for being loyal during his low point in life. Didnt blame me. Just resented that I was simply there, being loyal. Being supportive or understanding or loving. He hates me for that
#17
"You stopped doing my laundry", well, I was in a car accident and had back surgery, the doctor told me not lift, bend, or strain for 6wks post op.
#18
“I was bored and you live too far away” we lived 5 minutes apart, the girl he cheated with lived further away than me
#19
"It's your fault for not checking my location"
Hill Branda 5 hours ago (edited)
Translation: It's your fault for being a decent human being while I am an immoral scumbag.
#20
My ex said he was messaging the hook up ads on Craigslist because he wanted to see if they were robots. Lmao
#21
"You were crying and that made me upset so I wanted to feel better"
#22
mine told me it didn't count because he couldn't finish because he was thinking of me the whole time
#23
"There was a tornado near us and my anxiety was up" so I responded with "so you took shelter in her kitty cat?"
#24
"Her friend is a witch they put a love spell on me"
#26
“If you think about it I did it for us, that way I don’t get bored of you and we can stay together for many years”
#27
"I forgot you said she was off limits" we were in an open relationship and my only full stop was my sister and bestfriend.
Nice Beast Ludo 21 hours ago
My sister has a habit of tracking down and having sex with all my exes and male friends.
#28
"You treated me too good and it made me feel bad about myself"
#29
“I was upset and needed someone and you weren’t there” I WAS AT A FAMILY MEMEBERS FUNERAL!
#30
"you did everything for me... I think you're my soul mate. but you were more like a maid and cook"
Just me, Happy Flower 21 hours ago
Oh hell no! I’d probably be in jail after I was done with him.
#31
"Bro, I was gonna break up with you a few days ago and I forgot"
#32
He said he wanted to cheat on me before I cheated on him… I’ve still to this day never cheated on anyone before
#33
"I have split personality. That was my other personality Derek"
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
Derek conveniently appears when I see attractive women. My other personality, Lance, appears when I see hot men.
#35
Mine was “you were just too sad because so and so died” IT HAD BEEN 6 HOURS SINCE THEY DIED I DIDNT even tell him at that point
#36
My ex said “I was deployed, I thought it was okay” like no????
Just me, Happy Flower 21 hours ago
This happened to my niece too. I didn’t think anyone else thought that way.
#39
"You were too good for me so I cheated to feel better."
Nice Beast Ludo 21 hours ago
Sandra Bullock's husband with Kat Von D. I would use his name but I forgot it.
#40
He told me he was having a hard time… I had in two years; lost my dad, had a horrific pregnancy, remodelled our new home by myself, gave birth by c section, got postpartum depression, got scolded
Nice Beast Ludo 20 hours ago
"got scolded"- one of these things is not like the other, one of these things just isn't the same
#41
"I just wanted to know if our relationship was strong enough to get over it."
#43
"I have rib cancer and I only have 2-3 years left to live" He told his ex 6 months ago yesr before that. it's been 5 years and unfortunately he's still alive and well and has 6+ kids with 5+ women
#44
i didnt want to reject her....her feelings would get hurt....
Glen Ellyn 45 minutes ago
As if learning about his cheating is less painful than breaking up. 🤦🏻♀️ Sheesh.
#45
You're guy's exes came up with excuses?! my ex-husband just said "Well I knew you'd be mad, but I didn't think I'd be this mad."
pug nose curly tail 16 hours ago
She meant, "I knew you'd be mad, but I didn't think you'd be this mad."
#46
Not me but my moms ex husband cheated on her because of “finances” TWICE
#49
“Because you love Garrus Vakarian and Astarion more than me” my ex husband’s excuse. THEY ARE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS.
What do you think ?
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
I am surprised that half the world's population don't just live in women's only communes with armed guards on the door. I wouldn't blame you if you did.
B 14 hours ago
Ex-husband: "I knew a long period of emotional drama was coming". He said this after cheating on me during the week I was away for my brother's funeral.
MegDragon 6 hours ago
“You’re right, there was. Now that we’re breaking up it’s been avoided. So thanks.”
Load More Replies...
Sami-Jo Ross 7 hours ago
I'm engaged and my fiancee lives on the other side of the country. If I need happy time, I've got a phone and silicone. These excuses are LAUGHABLY bad.
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
I am surprised that half the world's population don't just live in women's only communes with armed guards on the door. I wouldn't blame you if you did.
B 14 hours ago
Ex-husband: "I knew a long period of emotional drama was coming". He said this after cheating on me during the week I was away for my brother's funeral.
MegDragon 6 hours ago
“You’re right, there was. Now that we’re breaking up it’s been avoided. So thanks.”
Load More Replies... Sami-Jo Ross 7 hours ago
I'm engaged and my fiancee lives on the other side of the country. If I need happy time, I've got a phone and silicone. These excuses are LAUGHABLY bad.
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