Woman Sets Up A Trap To Teach Snooping MIL A Lifelong Lesson About Boundaries

Unlike random acquaintances or, say, coworkers, maintaining boundaries with in-laws can be complicated. After all, you can’t just cut them out without some consequences and you generally need to get your partner on board. Most people are, unfortunately, a lot more forgiving when it comes to their parents, siblings and other relatives.

A woman asked if she was wrong to lay a trap for her constantly snooping MIL, who couldn’t keep her hands out of her purse. We reached out to the woman who made the post via private message and will update the article when she gets back to us.

Discovering that someone went through your stuff is a nasty feeling

Elderly woman sitting on stairs, searching through her brown handbag, wearing glasses and a green scarf.

Image credits: lucigerma / Freepik (not the actual photo)

So one woman decided to prove, conclusively, that her MIL was snooping

Text discussing a woman's suspicion about her MIL going through her purse, considering baiting her snooping MIL.

Text conversation about a purse inspection with an awkward interaction, suspecting someone's snooping behavior.

Text describing a situation where a woman suspects her MIL is searching her belongings.

Text detailing a woman's suspicions about her mother-in-law invading privacy by asking for personal logins and passwords.

Text discussing a woman's suspicion about her mother-in-law's public speaking abilities and experience.

Woman in a beige hoodie sipping coffee, holding a pen, and writing notes near a laptop, conveying suspicion of MIL.

Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

Text about a woman's writing career in an image related to her suspicion of MIL's actions.

Text showing a woman's fake letter to set up a suspecting MIL, mentioning a publisher and manuscript.

Unsealed envelope marked "Confidential" left visible to set up MIL, creating a sense of awkward suspicion.

Text about suspicion of MIL snooping, discussing secret writing career details.

Text screenshot of a woman suspecting her mother-in-law of snooping, planning to take action.

Text referencing a woman suspecting MIL of snooping, asking if baiting her again would be appropriate.

Text about a woman suspecting her MIL of going through her things, including a camp and drying jeans.

Elderly woman with white hair and striped shirt standing thoughtfully, suggesting a mother-in-law scenario.

Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

Text image discussing boundaries and communication issues with mother-in-law.

Text excerpt discussing a husband's reaction to wife's suspicion about MIL going through her belongings.

Image credits: Blue85Heron

Some in-laws are simply worse than others

While “bad in-laws” seems like a tale as old as time, it’s important to note that in this story, the MIL is going “above and beyond.” Normally, one complains about passive-aggressive comments or perhaps too many demands about what to have for Thanksgiving dinner, but secretly going through someone’s stuff is entirely abnormal. This is why some folks end up taking drastic measures to limit the damage their spouse’s family insists on inflicting.

So this is less about establishing boundaries, since your property is by all definitions a boundary, and more about enforcing them. After all, telling someone they can’t enter your house without your permission isn’t a “personal boundary,” it’s the law. Similarly, this is such a bizarre case, that one actually needs to gather evidence before making accusations, particularly about your partner’s elderly mother.

It’s also worth pointing out that the husband is quite aware of how she acts, in the woman’s own words, “we did say no to her.” In this sense, the wife’s plan is ingenious, as it only “harms” the MIL, in the broadest sense of the word, if she is legitimately snooping around. At the very least, it’s just a bit of fun. After all, who doesn’t like making up fake letters for fake scenarios?

This level of intrusiveness is just not healthy for anyone

As many commenters noted, her having password access is a considerably bigger issue. It’s not just a regular security problem, it might make the wife and her partner liable if the mother does actually do something strange. In general, most banks, for example, simply do not allow people to share passwords like that. It can in many cases be a literal breach of terms and conditions.

At the very least, it’s a security concern and it’s also just unhealthy. A parent should not be snooping this much into the private and financial details of their very adult children. This is bizarre behavior that probably indicates that the mother needs some psychological help. Fortunately, the husband does seem to understand the issue.

One thing that frequently spurs on terrible in-law behavior is their adult child not taking their actions seriously. Many people hand-wave their parents’ behavior or, even worse, take their side in situations like this. Imagine being this woman with a husband who refused to listen to you or, again, even worse, voluntarily handed over bank and investment account passwords to their mother. Regardless, this woman’s actions are, at “worst” just a bit of a prank, and at best something to make her MIL’s unhealthy snooping an issue for her.

Netizens shared some of their own ideas

Comment suggests changing passwords to prevent MIL from snooping.

Reddit comment suggesting a way to address suspicion of mother-in-law going through belongings.

Comment discussing setting boundaries with a nosy person.

Comment suggesting a woman set up her MIL who might be going through her things for personal reasons.

Reddit comment discussing a woman's suspicion about her MIL going through her things, suggesting a setup strategy.

Comment suggesting using a fake password notebook to check if someone is accessing your accounts.

Comment suggesting pranks to confirm suspicions of mother-in-law going through personal items.

Reddit comment advising on dealing with snooping mother-in-law, suggesting confrontation.

Reddit comment discussing relationship dynamics and mother-in-law issues.

Screenshot of a Facebook comment suggesting a plan to create fake scenarios for a suspicious mother-in-law.

Comment discussing credit protection and passwords in context of mother-in-law suspicion.

While some had similar experiences

Reddit thread discussing a MIL with no boundaries, containing tips on maintaining sanity and dealing with toxic family dynamics.

Text post about a woman suspecting her MIL of snooping and setting a trap with a fake item.

Reddit post about a woman suspecting her MIL of snooping, setting a trap with glitter in an envelope.

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I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

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I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

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What do you think ?

POST

TribbleThinking 1 month ago

The glitter bomb. 😄

43points

Traveling Lady Railfan 1 month ago

"snoopy people" are the worst. I can't imagine violating someone's privacy so casually and openly. (PS. I like Snoopy though)

24points

kath morgan 1 month ago

It’s fun but it sounds like more of an faff than just not indulging the rummaging. If someone had their hands in my bag I would say “don’t rummage through my things”, and take it to the bathroom with me. Who cares if mum thinks I have something to hide, as an adult? She’s not an authority you need to answer to.

21points

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