Scrolling through this list of horrors brought back memories of my own apartment dwelling dramas. And boy, have I had a few. Personally, I prefer living in a free-standing house. Partly because I have a pet, and partly because I love my privacy and space. When I say pet, what I mean is a furkid. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love my dog.

So imagine my surprise when I got an unexpected knock on my door one random Friday morning and found an animal welfare inspector standing there, alongside a security guard. Completely confused, and very convinced they were at the wrong apartment, I asked how I could assist.

“I’m here to investigate a complaint, mam,” came the reply. To which I confidently told him that he must have my apartment confused with another. The inspector glanced down at his notes, repeated my apartment number and told me that he was definitely at the right place.

At this point, my very healthy and happy “velcro dog” was right at my feet, seemingly just as confused as me. Mind you, I did notice the inspector checking the dog out, with a slightly perplexed look.

To cut a long and crazy story short, it turns out “someone” had reported me for leaving my dog alone at home for days on end. The inspector was very satisfied that this wasn’t the case, and that my dog was living his best life, at times believing he too was human.

I obviously had more than enough proof that I’d not gone away. I also allowed the inspector to check the dog, his food and treats cupboard, water bowl, sleeping quarters (my bedroom), etc. I had my dog's up-to-date vet card at hand, as well as great photos and references to prove my competence as a pet owner. The inspector didn't ask for these but did apologize for his visit, adding that he often has to waste time and resources being called out to complexes, for nothing in particular.

When I posted about my experience on the complex WhatsApp group chat (don’t get me started on those), I received a very rude direct message. The guilty party told me they’d been “watching” me since I moved in and that I am “never at home”.

I found this quite amusing but also infuriating since I am at home 90% of the time – and how would they know whether I was or wasn’t. I responded by telling them to up their stalking game because I’ve been home the whole week, and I’m currently typing this message from my lounge. "Can you see me now, Karen?"

A bit more back and forth, and it emerged that my lovely neighbor had assumed my long absence because she hadn’t seen a car parked in my parking bay for a while. And at one point, she had heard the dog barking. As I reminded her, I have a front door. You’re able to knock on it, or slip a note underneath.

What I should have said was “Never Assume, it makes an A*s of U and Me”. One of my very funny friends later advised me to park my son’s toy car in the bay, to avoid any of this ever happening again.

In another incident, three actually, my dog was getting bouts of violent illness. The kind where you find yourself wanting to throw up while cleaning up. I thought it strange because I hadn’t fed him anything weird. He and I hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary. He hadn’t been in contact with sick dogs, and was fully vaccinated. It all made sense when I caught an upstairs neighbor throwing food scraps (old meat) from her balcony into the garden of my ground floor apartment.

I’d like to believe the elderly woman was doing this with good intentions. As angry and disgusted as I was, I decided to take a calm approach. I kindly informed her that her “generosity” was making my dog sick, and if she wanted to give him any treats, she should please ask me first. She understood, apologized never did it again, and we were able to live happily ever onwards.

Loving thy neighbor is often easier said than done. A recent LendingTree survey found that 1 in 4 Americans can’t stand their neighbor. Almost half say it’s because the guy or girl next door is unfriendly or rude. 31% say they make too much noise, and 29% say they live next door to someone who just can’t mind their own business. Around 3 in 10 millennials have even packed up their belongings and moved because of a problem neighbor.