30 Of The Funniest “This Is When I Realized This Person Is Stupid On A Whole New Level” Stories
Whether we like it or not, fleeting moments of stupidity happen. Being dummies now and then—it’s all part of human nature. No news in that department. But the funny part about it is how people we think we know just suddenly turn out to be on a whole new level of stupidity.
So when Reddit user u/bost724 posted the question “What was your 'This person is on another level of stupid' moment?” on r/AskReddit, it instantly got 67.9k upvotes. It turns out, people on Reddit have been through a whole bunch of intolerable stupidities.
From believing that a nuclear power plant is literally a plant, to asking “How many Alaskan dollars is a US dollar worth?” with a full-on straight face, these are some of the most hilarious "seriously?!" moments you couldn't even think of.
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Anyone who wears a mask but doesn’t pull it up over their nose
I locked my purse with my keys and cell phone in my apartment. I went to the office to ask maintenance to let me in. The woman at the desk said she would call maintenance and asked for a phone number they could reach me at. I said there wasn’t one because my cell phone was locked in my apartment. She insisted she needed a number. I said I could give her the number but that I wouldn’t be able to answer if they called. She suggested I get my phone out of my apartment so that I could answer when they called. I rolled my eyes at her and said if I could get in my apartment to get my cell phone I wouldn’t need maintenance to let me in. She never did understand me. But maintenance did show up ten minutes later.
This was my first experience in retail where I learned what many customers would be like.
Seasons were changing, so we put a lot of shirts we had to get rid of in the front and made them 50% off. I was working the register when a woman came up to buy her things. I rang her up and could see a look on her face like something was wrong. That’s when the following happened.
Lady: “Why is this so much.”
Me: “Pardon me?”
Lady: “This should only be $10 not $20.”
I thought that maybe her item was on sale, so I asked if she could point out the sign because I wasn’t aware of it. It was a small store and we didn't have to walk anywhere.
Lady: “This sign here.”
Me: “This sign says that all shirts are 50% off.”
Lady: “Yes, so why is this full price.”
Me: “This is a hat.”
Whether it’s a line someone said that sounded utterly stupid, or a thing somebody did that looked just plain foolish, these moments do indeed make us wonder whether people around us are not the smartest ones. At the same time, you start wondering if you are better than them. From common sense to plain talent, what if you just come to have more of it?
Some people secretly (and others, not so much) feel as if they are superior to others. This phenomenon is known as the self-enhancement effect and involves taking a tendentiously positive view of oneself. This research has shown that just like eating, it’s a fundamental part of human nature.
I’m an identical twin, and have been asked all manner of utterly ridiculous questions about it throughout my life. But I think the stupidest was when a girl once asked me “do you ever get yourselves mixed up with each other?” I responded “are you asking me if I ever sometimes think I’m my brother?” she replied, “yeah.”
No. I don’t.
Now try some psychotropic drugs, and let see if that answer changes :D
The time a friend told me how much he hates potatoes....while eating French fries and I literally blew his mind by telling him French fries are potatoes..
Coworker bought a low-flow shower head. He filled the BATHTUB using the new low-flow shower head BECAUSE IT WOULD USE LESS WATER!
This type of thinking, however, is not to be confused with a superiority complex, which, in psychological terms, is viewed as a defense mechanism to what's really going on with the person.
According to professional counselor Nickia Lowery, “When a person acts superior to another, they really feel that the other is a perceived threat. In some way, they believe others will find out that they really are 'inadequate' and therefore behave in ways that make them feel like they are 'better' than the rest."
These people tend to compare themselves with others, and they continually search for proof that they indeed are better. This becomes a stressful vicious circle, and one may even need professional advice to free themselves from anxiety and mood swings.
I once worked in a midwestern grocery store deli and I was trying to explain to a woman that the name brand and generic brand of the macaroni salad that we carried were in fact identical. The woman yelled at me saying she could only have the generic brand because “one is made with mayo and the other is made with mayonnaise and I don’t like mayo”. When I tried to explain that mayo is an abbreviation of mayonnaise, she just said “I’m from the south, I know my food” and tutted away.
My guess is that she is calling something like "Miracle Whip" mayo....and then calling everything else, mayonnaise. I have heard some really daft people do the same thing...smh.
I hope she knows that Ladyfingers are cookies and that there are not young ladies walking around without fingers.
Why? Some of my best friends are from Georgia, Alabama and South Carolina and they are all scientists...
Load More Replies...My Mexican American friend, Waiting tables at her uncle s Mexican restaurant got a little upset when a white lady from the mid US tried to tell her how to make Mexican food.
I love these kinds of people because they remind me that even though I might be dumb, I'm not this dumb
I love how "I'm from the south" is a way of proving you know everything! :D
People just don't understand name brand and generic or that No Name is a brand.
To be fair, there is an olive oil based mayonnaise substitute named Mayo.
Sorry I don't speak wrong and neither do you. I feel sorry for you.
I had a lady throw the "I'm from the south so I know my food" at me over yams. Spent 10 minutes trying to explain the difference between sweet potatoes and yams and even showed her the box they come in and she said that the farm must have marked them wrong. That's all that particular grower sells, but they don't know what they're growing?
Be sympathetic here, people. It's hard to get by without any functioning brain cells.
Ummmm....In the South they call things by generic names, but it could be something else. Like they call all sodas...Cokes. "You want a Coke" just means.."Do you want a soda?"
Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid
Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid Stupid
Load More Replies...Yeah. That's a Southern thing... Sheltered lives, subpar educations and all that. My great Aunt still insists the South won the Civil war!!
I was once asked how it felt to come to the US as a refugee (I'm from Germany). She then looked rather surprised when I told her that Hitler has been dead for 75 years and that Germany is one of the more liberal countries in the world these days. She full on thought I fled Nazi Germany.
HHHMMM Sorry but that does not surprise me about America. Look who they elected to President
My wife's cousin and her husband/not-baby-daddy-of her-unborn-child fell on self induced hard times and needed a place to stay for a bit. We setup a queen sized air mattress in the living room for them. For 3 weeks I woke up to go to work and every morning saw them sleeping on it sideways with their legs hanging off the edge. Then one day she asked me to buy her a bigger air mattress because this one was hard on their backs. I told her to turn her body (the f**king thing even has a built in pillow on one end). Her response was that then they couldn't see the TV. THEN F**KING TURN THE AIR MATTRESS TO FACE THE TV! That's the story of how I became an asshole to the trailer trash side of the family.
The bad part is that its only one of many stories. The husband was a cook at Applebee's. The baby daddy was a cook at Applebee's, and her new husband was......another cook from the same f**king Applebee's. All working together.
Rescued a coworker on the side of the road with a flat tire, waiting for the tow truck, I pointed out the nail at the top of their tire. They scoffed and looked at me like I was the stupidest person in the world and exclaimed
that’s not true bc it’s flat at the bottom
I just walked away and never brought it up again
So David Beckham comes home with a flat tyre and Posh is looking out the window when he arrives. He proceeds to blow up the exhaust tube with all his might and Posh shouts "What are you doing Becks?" Becks says he's blowing the tyre back up. So she laughs hard and then, between guffaws, says "You're such a fool. That won't work, you've left the windows down"
Back when the Fukushima nuclear power plant disaster happened we were discussing how the reactor had failed in a science class. 5 minutes into the conversation a girl piped up and said "I don't see what the big deal is. Why can't we just regrow it?"
She dead ass thought a nuclear power plant was... A plant
Well, it confused me too when I first heard it (Dutch person here). Not that I thought it actually was a plant, but I didn't know what to make of it either. I mean, why would you call it a plant?
Dated a guy~ we watched TITANIC.... he thought the movie was stupid because the boat sank. It wasn’t believable. You can’t recover from that. Ever
I met a guy who got hit by a train. Not that bad, but a year later he went to show his daughter where and how he got hit by the train and he got hit again.
I got a concussion a while back. A friend of mine told me not to come close because it might be contagious. They weren't kidding.
I worked at a restaurant and we had a dish that was just a whole grilled chicken, chopped into pieces. A woman who ordered for delivery called us, absolutely scathing, complaining that her order of one whole chicken only contained TWO chicken breasts. Had to explain to grown ass woman that chicken only have two breasts.
My boss asked me to file the spam mail. This man was one of those people who think they are the smartest person in the room. So spam folder Okay... weird, but okay. I couldn’t find any spam mail that wasn’t already in the spam folder. Afternoon comes and he stomps over to my desk area and wants to know why the spam isn’t in the spam folder as he throws a Manila folder on my desk. The folder was labeled spam. He prints spam mail out and files it. And with any sign of skepticism on my face, he’d insist the IT guy told him that’s where spam goes so he got himself a folder and that was it. I had to get the f**k out.
I had an old boss who somehow was the manager of an IT helpdesk with absolutely frilling zero knowledge of computers. Once threw a hissy fit after reading another department’s meeting minutes - “how come they get to move to Office 13? I want my team to move to Office 13” there were only 10 actual offices in the building and the meeting was about upgrading their MS Office software to Office 2013. Another - she shouts at me for putting the ‘recycle’ pile paper back into the printer so I could print on the other side. “Don’t be stupid! You can’t put the same piece of paper back into the Pinter!” So I legit ask her what about when you choose the double-sided print option and she says there’s no such thing. Another - pulls me into a disciplinary for giving a customer incorrect advice. Customer kept ‘losing’ documents, even though they were saving them each time. They only had 4MB left on their hard drive and she didn’t see the problem...
There was a girl in my high school who forced the teacher to pause a documentary about people living in mud huts in Africa because she was upset that they were showing us fictional movies in a history class. It took everyone else in the room to convince her that people actually live like that in some places. Wealthy area living for ya.
When I read yesterday that people think ocean water and sand are giving them coronavirus, rather than realizing its because they are spending time on a crowded beach with strangers. Smh
A lot of people still don't understand how a virus spreads. It's strange that somehow they are able to find the wildest conspiracy theories about masks and chips in vaccines on the internet, but somehow can't find the official websites giving them all the information they need to understand what is happening.
Summer camp counselor made all the kids on a school bus keep the windows up on a hot day because "they could feel the Air Conditoning" coming from the front of the bus.
It was so hot and I (maybe 10 years old at the time) had to explain to the 40 year old counselor that the "air conditioning" they were feeling was the wind coming in through the bus drivers open window. She still didn't believe me.
I begged her to ask the bus driver to confirm the bus did not have air conditioning but she didn't want to bother him while he was driving. It was like a 1 hour bus trip.
She finally got hot enough and asked the bus driver if the bus had air conditioning. And he jokingly said "The bus only has air conditioning when the windows are down and the wheels are turning." She then looked back at me and said" See? I told you the bus had air conditioning" and proceeded to force us to keep the windows up.
My sister asked if the Eiffel Tower was in Paris or France and couldn't understand how it could be in both...
Edit: Woah. My top rated comment is me announcing one of my sister's airhead moments haha. I feel like I need to defend her now.
This happened when she was like 14. She's 26 now. She went on to graduate from college and graduated top of her class.
She later clarified that she meant to ask if the Eiffel Tower was in Paris or elsewhere in France but she clearly didn't say it like that.
She's gonna kill me when I tell her how much attention this got.
This story is in good faith.
I was asking my friend, J, when he learned about 9/11. He started telling me this specific story of how he walked outside and saw smoke everywhere and how he asked his mom about it, he claimed she said planes hit the towers.
I stared at him, just silently taking in the story.
We live in the Midwest, there was no way he saw the debris from the towers.
Also we were born in 2003.
Dude burned down his convenience store for an insurance claim, and stopped the milk and bread deliveries the day before.
I work for Parks Canada in Yoho National Park. I have been asked the question (seriously), “Where do you keep the animals at night?” twice in my career. To this day I still find great joy imagining what they thought was going on each night as we “collected” every large animal in the Parks.
I worked at a pet store in college. This customer asked me which food would make his pit bull “swole.” I suggested a high protein food with a good amount of exercise but advised that a lot of it was determined by the dog’s genetics. He asked me if we sold genetics.
It may just be something our descendants will be able to go shopping for. I hope this market will be restricted to fixing disability-causing mutations, but I fear that the geneticists can replace today's plastic surgeons getting themselves rich by doing only surgery that is not needed for any medical reasons.
I moved to the UK from Germany. A guy asked me if we had colours in Germany.
Knew a girl in middle school that didn't understand the concept of perspective
She also thought North was whichever direction you were facing at the time
In high school I met a boy who asked me for a hygienic cloth because he thought he had a period, actually he only sat on a melted popsicle
I had to explain to a girl why you couldnt grow your hair down in front of your face and just cut out eye holes. Even explaining it her she couldnt grasp it and brushed me off as being "too smart."
I was friends with with a guy who believed those fake apple adverts like "Apple Wave - Microwave your phone for instant battery charge" I was so dumbfounded that he actually fell for it. When I saw him the week after and he had a new phone it all clicked for me
I would say that not all people understand technology, but for the other posts...
I used to work with a girl who was sweet but so dumb. We were in a meeting once and somehow someone mentioned baked ham. My manager said "Ugh I hate ham. It looks like human flesh." The girl I mentioned was sitting next to me and looked horrified and whispered "Does ham really come from people?"
When I was in 6th grade ( 11yo) I had to tell my teacher that the statue of liberty was a present by the french -- she, an adult, didn't know (strange so far), but worse: she was my history teacher.
Thank you for putting your age. On an international website it is frustrating when people talk about the grade they are in as if everyone is going to know what that means. 👍
Load More Replies...My ex-boyfriend bought like 6 bananas a week and trew out 5 after they turned bad. Every time. I asked him why he didn't just buy the amount of bananas he needed. His answer: "because the store never has sets of 2, only sets of 6". This guy was 47 years old, survived living on his own for a while, but never thought of taking off just the abount of bananas he needed.
Don't throw out "old bananas" squirrels love them. You don't even have to peel them.
Load More Replies...I was visiting with relatives in Scottsdale, Arizona, a lovely couple in their 60ies. They took me here and they took me there and as I took in the landscape, I asked aunt Gladys if the desert had been the bottom of a sea before. She turned around in the front seat to face me, looked me over, and declared in the way that only a very stern childless aunt can declare something that "We have lived here since 1950, and it has ALWAYS looked like this!". End of discussion.
Scottsdale, the home of all retired people
Load More Replies...Sex ed class, we were about 15. Teacher explains how babies are made. After about half an hour, my friend genuinely asks: "So... how does the sperm get through the clothes?"
One of the highly-paid managers at work asked me to print two copies of a report -- one for him and one to fax (this was the mid-90s). I asked him if he thought the fax machine worked like the transporters in Star Trek.
A girl in an office I once worked at called the repairman because her electric typewriter wasn't working. He took one look at it and said you have to turn it on.
A computer consultant charged the secretary $40 to plug her computer back in. The cleaning lady must have unplugged it to use the vacuum cleaner.
Load More Replies...A friend an I were wandering around one of our thermal regions, in New Zealand, when a tourist came rushing up and asked when they turned the geyser on. We contained our laughter until he was out of earshot.
This is actually not such a stupid question. They do actually control the geyser's timing by dropping pieces of soap into it. This breaks the water's surface tension and causes the geyser to erupt. Google "lady knox geyser soap."
Load More Replies...I’m sure I’m in some people’s stories. I’m not stupid, but my brain does stupid things sometimes.
I was thinking the same.First off, I have brain f**ts, and second of all, I rarely assume anything and take things too literally. I have provided hours and hours of amusement for my son :-)
Load More Replies...My sister, I love this woman and she is not an idiot, gave me the best one ever. We needed orange glitter to do a skit we were filming for YouTube. She looked at me and said "I don't have orange but I have some yellow and red, can't we just mix them together to make the Orange Glitter". I stared at her for almost 2 minutes spechless l, before I told her Glitter doesn't work that way. I will point out she's an artist, so she knows the color wheel and paint mixing, she also loathes glitter to the core of her being so she doesn't have experience with it. I had to explain how tiny pre-colored plastic pieces don't work like paint. We both about died laughing after I explained it and we both still bring it up.
Heheheee, thats actually so sweet. So immersed in the experience of using paints, that she applies it to glitter. You should glitter-bomb her some time 😆
Load More Replies...Years ago my military unit landed in Guam for a trans Pac. A Mastrr Sergeant asked me"Where do I get my dollars exchanged for the local currency?" Guam is a territory of the USA
I had a friend go on holiday to Texas a few years back (we're British). He was in a taxi and the taxi driver asked where he was from. 'England', my friend replied and the taxi driver said 'wow you speak really good English'. Bit of confusion and after a minute's silence my friend said 'of course, I'm English'. The taxi said that he thought 'you guys spoke French over there'.
Every single single trump supporter and conspiracy theorist. Complete idiots, all of them.
"The fact that you can't find proof, proves it's a conspiracy"
Load More Replies...I once worked with a girl who was delightful and lovely but not the sharpest tool in the box. She thought wind turbines actually generated the wind and they were switched off in the summer months!
Uncle Mike had all of us kids convinced that when the trees wave their arms, it makes the wind blow. Still makes sense to me!
Load More Replies...a chem plant electrical supervisor was training the new apprentice electrician on how to work on energized high voltage equipment. The was a metal cage enclosing a three-phase 2300 VAC switch-gear set up that was the motor control starter for a high horsepower motor. The supervisor opened up the locked cage and pointed to the three exposed bus wires which were all energized at the time. He warned the apprentice that he should never put his finger or hand within one-half inch of an exposed wire energized with 2300 VAC because the electricity could arc over one-half inch. To illustrate the point, he put his finger within one-half inch of the exposed power wire. Sure enough, the electricity reached an arc over to his finger. It electrocuted him on the spot. The EMTs were not able to get him back. He trained the apprentice well. The apprentice will never do this after this poignant illustrated lesson. (true story, no kidding! somebody notify the Darwin Awards people)
My ex insisted that he went to school with a set of identical twins, ‘but one was a boy and one was a girl’.
Unlikely, perhaps, but one of them *could* have been trans and your ex somehow missed that detail.
Load More Replies...The housekeeper of my uncle says she’s been abducted by aliens and buys in to all the anti-vaxx, 5g, Bill Gates, microchip, plandemic nonsense out there. I can’t even talk to her, because I just can’t contain my laughter every time I think of this.
When my grandma died we had to turn in her fire arms. My mom did not want it and I was too young. At the police station the police officer actually asked my mom what the address of the deceased was.... She got angry when my mom said the cemetery and asked again. Address of the deceased and I then said the name of the cemetery and added plot 70 and she was happy. I mean did she even hear herself?
She probably needed the address for where the guns were registered. She may have worded it wrong, but the mom should have just given the former address, no need to smart off.
Load More Replies...A story from a co-worker. He came across a lady in distress standing next to her car. The shops had all closed for the day, and she couldn't get into her car because the battery in the car remote clicker had died. My co-worker just took the keys, and manually unlocked the car for her. Problem solved.
I as a young adult thought buffalo wings came from buffalos. I would not touch them. Than finally as a mid 20 something I was told they actually are from chickens. So I tried one and loved it. I haven’t lived that down since.
How silly, real buffalo wings are much bigger. How could buffalos fly with such tiny little wings? (kidding)
Load More Replies...These stories all seem made up. They aren't . It makes you wonder how these people got out of the birth canal!
Stupid people shouldn't be allowed to breed!
Load More Replies...Volunteered at a riding school. Several kids asked, why don't our ponies have wings. Kind of cute, but shows how artificial is the environment some people live in.
Scams: a guy once told me a story of how he fell for a banking scam twice. When I tried telling them that under no circumstances would his bank *ever* call him, especially from a hidden number his defence was: "But their English was great!" We were both living in the UK....
I am dumbfounded at all the dumb there actually is going on in this world!
Some of them can only survive via the grace love understanding wisdom and patience of. Lisa Pockat Bork.
Load More Replies...A couple of years ago, while walking through the fields at a lovely evening, my (now very, very much ex) boyfriend who was at that time 37yo and had a teenage daughter, asked me where do stars go at night. He could not wrap his mind around the fact that they are very much still in the sky, just impossible to see with naked eye due the overpowering bright of the sun. He legit thought the stars just... go off, or are hidden on the other side of the planet... SMH
"Where stars go at night"? Right, you just can't see them at night becaue the sun is so bright from dusk til dawn.
Load More Replies..."The two most common things in the Universe are hydrogen and stupidity." - Albert Einstein
My brother and I was watching Jeff Dunham. Peanut said that he is also a ventriloquist....he talked without moving his mouth....My brother..he is 15...he asked me how Peanut can talk without moving his mouth...
I went to the store looking for plungers, went to one of the employees and asked where the plumbers were.😐
Bawahahahahaha there is just no accounting for the absolute stupidity of some people!!
When I was a kid, I would ask for a hamburger without the brown bit (I don't eat beef)
I worked with a girl that made a phone call on speaker and the line rang 'busy'. So she just let it "beep beep beep' and finally I said to her " ffs hang up" . She replied " well they have to answer eventually". #FacePalm. She also asked if we file by date or by alphabet. The file cabinet had folders from A to Z. She was definitely a source of entertainment.
So sick of the ads constantly covering these entries, one after another. I click skip and they open up. Ruining the fun of being here. These were enjoyable.
My uncle told us kids that when the trees wave their arms, it makes the wind blow. Still makes sense to me!
A girl and I were talking about our favourite diwali crackers to which she said,she only liked the diwali cracker roll toy gun as it is eco-friendly and harmless.Speaking of which I remembered a riddle and riddled her telling it's a riddle, here it goes: me: A man shot a woman but she didn't die or (was hurt) ,how? she:*thinks for a moment* well,she would have dodged the bullet or he would have missed her. me:(smiles at her satisfyingly) no,he shot her with a camera ;) she:yeah,obviuously he would have missed her with that camera shaped gun.Duh. I am not sure if she was refering to a sniper rifle because at that time I didn't have any idea about it and was very much content with a camera being the answer.
As late as yesterday, on the train, I overheard a woman speaking to her boyfriend and complaining how slow the train was moving. Then she said "I should have waited the 5 minutes to the next train from another company." Yep, love, that's how rails work...
To be fair it can work like that. Not all routes are single but can have multiple tracks for different speed trains. You can get stoping trains, so-called because they stop at every station, and fast trains that only stop at the main stations. My nearest station taking the fast train, which will pass the slow, can trim 35 minutes off a journey.
Load More Replies...I am always putting items down and not remembering where I put them. Bought a key holder, so that takes care of car keys. Have two pair of sun glasses and leave one in each car, so that takes care of that. BUT, I can NEVER find the tv clicker. Well, a friend of mine bought me a device that is a clicker for tiny clickers that you stick on things you are always "losing" like the clicker. I just looked at her and said "how in the hell am I going to remember where I put the master clicker for all the other clickers if I can't remember where the tv clicker is? A clicker is a clicker.
When i was 5 i actually thought that babies burst out of the stomach, and that was how they were born.
My daughter, now 20, up until a couple years ago thought the percent of weather was the actual amount, not the potential. Like, 10% - no worries; 100% - better buy a boat.
When I was little, I believed that criminals were executed by letting them be the bad guys shot or hanged on "Gunsmoke". Grandma just laughed, but never corrected me.
It's funny how people tell stories about other people, but then feel the need to mention that the other person is, in fact, very smart. Who cares? First of all, anybody can have a dumb moment. Also, I don't know you. I don't know the person you are talking about... So why bother?
I get what you're saying, but I understand it, I think. What people say can affect how they themselves think. They want to include the fact that it was just a dumb moment or that sort of thing as saying it aloud reinforces that they do in fact not hold it against the person. Also, posting on the internet, it might get back to the person they are talking about.
Load More Replies...When I was in 6th grade ( 11yo) I had to tell my teacher that the statue of liberty was a present by the french -- she, an adult, didn't know (strange so far), but worse: she was my history teacher.
Thank you for putting your age. On an international website it is frustrating when people talk about the grade they are in as if everyone is going to know what that means. 👍
Load More Replies...My ex-boyfriend bought like 6 bananas a week and trew out 5 after they turned bad. Every time. I asked him why he didn't just buy the amount of bananas he needed. His answer: "because the store never has sets of 2, only sets of 6". This guy was 47 years old, survived living on his own for a while, but never thought of taking off just the abount of bananas he needed.
Don't throw out "old bananas" squirrels love them. You don't even have to peel them.
Load More Replies...I was visiting with relatives in Scottsdale, Arizona, a lovely couple in their 60ies. They took me here and they took me there and as I took in the landscape, I asked aunt Gladys if the desert had been the bottom of a sea before. She turned around in the front seat to face me, looked me over, and declared in the way that only a very stern childless aunt can declare something that "We have lived here since 1950, and it has ALWAYS looked like this!". End of discussion.
Scottsdale, the home of all retired people
Load More Replies...Sex ed class, we were about 15. Teacher explains how babies are made. After about half an hour, my friend genuinely asks: "So... how does the sperm get through the clothes?"
One of the highly-paid managers at work asked me to print two copies of a report -- one for him and one to fax (this was the mid-90s). I asked him if he thought the fax machine worked like the transporters in Star Trek.
A girl in an office I once worked at called the repairman because her electric typewriter wasn't working. He took one look at it and said you have to turn it on.
A computer consultant charged the secretary $40 to plug her computer back in. The cleaning lady must have unplugged it to use the vacuum cleaner.
Load More Replies...A friend an I were wandering around one of our thermal regions, in New Zealand, when a tourist came rushing up and asked when they turned the geyser on. We contained our laughter until he was out of earshot.
This is actually not such a stupid question. They do actually control the geyser's timing by dropping pieces of soap into it. This breaks the water's surface tension and causes the geyser to erupt. Google "lady knox geyser soap."
Load More Replies...I’m sure I’m in some people’s stories. I’m not stupid, but my brain does stupid things sometimes.
I was thinking the same.First off, I have brain f**ts, and second of all, I rarely assume anything and take things too literally. I have provided hours and hours of amusement for my son :-)
Load More Replies...My sister, I love this woman and she is not an idiot, gave me the best one ever. We needed orange glitter to do a skit we were filming for YouTube. She looked at me and said "I don't have orange but I have some yellow and red, can't we just mix them together to make the Orange Glitter". I stared at her for almost 2 minutes spechless l, before I told her Glitter doesn't work that way. I will point out she's an artist, so she knows the color wheel and paint mixing, she also loathes glitter to the core of her being so she doesn't have experience with it. I had to explain how tiny pre-colored plastic pieces don't work like paint. We both about died laughing after I explained it and we both still bring it up.
Heheheee, thats actually so sweet. So immersed in the experience of using paints, that she applies it to glitter. You should glitter-bomb her some time 😆
Load More Replies...Years ago my military unit landed in Guam for a trans Pac. A Mastrr Sergeant asked me"Where do I get my dollars exchanged for the local currency?" Guam is a territory of the USA
I had a friend go on holiday to Texas a few years back (we're British). He was in a taxi and the taxi driver asked where he was from. 'England', my friend replied and the taxi driver said 'wow you speak really good English'. Bit of confusion and after a minute's silence my friend said 'of course, I'm English'. The taxi said that he thought 'you guys spoke French over there'.
Every single single trump supporter and conspiracy theorist. Complete idiots, all of them.
"The fact that you can't find proof, proves it's a conspiracy"
Load More Replies...I once worked with a girl who was delightful and lovely but not the sharpest tool in the box. She thought wind turbines actually generated the wind and they were switched off in the summer months!
Uncle Mike had all of us kids convinced that when the trees wave their arms, it makes the wind blow. Still makes sense to me!
Load More Replies...a chem plant electrical supervisor was training the new apprentice electrician on how to work on energized high voltage equipment. The was a metal cage enclosing a three-phase 2300 VAC switch-gear set up that was the motor control starter for a high horsepower motor. The supervisor opened up the locked cage and pointed to the three exposed bus wires which were all energized at the time. He warned the apprentice that he should never put his finger or hand within one-half inch of an exposed wire energized with 2300 VAC because the electricity could arc over one-half inch. To illustrate the point, he put his finger within one-half inch of the exposed power wire. Sure enough, the electricity reached an arc over to his finger. It electrocuted him on the spot. The EMTs were not able to get him back. He trained the apprentice well. The apprentice will never do this after this poignant illustrated lesson. (true story, no kidding! somebody notify the Darwin Awards people)
My ex insisted that he went to school with a set of identical twins, ‘but one was a boy and one was a girl’.
Unlikely, perhaps, but one of them *could* have been trans and your ex somehow missed that detail.
Load More Replies...The housekeeper of my uncle says she’s been abducted by aliens and buys in to all the anti-vaxx, 5g, Bill Gates, microchip, plandemic nonsense out there. I can’t even talk to her, because I just can’t contain my laughter every time I think of this.
When my grandma died we had to turn in her fire arms. My mom did not want it and I was too young. At the police station the police officer actually asked my mom what the address of the deceased was.... She got angry when my mom said the cemetery and asked again. Address of the deceased and I then said the name of the cemetery and added plot 70 and she was happy. I mean did she even hear herself?
She probably needed the address for where the guns were registered. She may have worded it wrong, but the mom should have just given the former address, no need to smart off.
Load More Replies...A story from a co-worker. He came across a lady in distress standing next to her car. The shops had all closed for the day, and she couldn't get into her car because the battery in the car remote clicker had died. My co-worker just took the keys, and manually unlocked the car for her. Problem solved.
I as a young adult thought buffalo wings came from buffalos. I would not touch them. Than finally as a mid 20 something I was told they actually are from chickens. So I tried one and loved it. I haven’t lived that down since.
How silly, real buffalo wings are much bigger. How could buffalos fly with such tiny little wings? (kidding)
Load More Replies...These stories all seem made up. They aren't . It makes you wonder how these people got out of the birth canal!
Stupid people shouldn't be allowed to breed!
Load More Replies...Volunteered at a riding school. Several kids asked, why don't our ponies have wings. Kind of cute, but shows how artificial is the environment some people live in.
Scams: a guy once told me a story of how he fell for a banking scam twice. When I tried telling them that under no circumstances would his bank *ever* call him, especially from a hidden number his defence was: "But their English was great!" We were both living in the UK....
I am dumbfounded at all the dumb there actually is going on in this world!
Some of them can only survive via the grace love understanding wisdom and patience of. Lisa Pockat Bork.
Load More Replies...A couple of years ago, while walking through the fields at a lovely evening, my (now very, very much ex) boyfriend who was at that time 37yo and had a teenage daughter, asked me where do stars go at night. He could not wrap his mind around the fact that they are very much still in the sky, just impossible to see with naked eye due the overpowering bright of the sun. He legit thought the stars just... go off, or are hidden on the other side of the planet... SMH
"Where stars go at night"? Right, you just can't see them at night becaue the sun is so bright from dusk til dawn.
Load More Replies..."The two most common things in the Universe are hydrogen and stupidity." - Albert Einstein
My brother and I was watching Jeff Dunham. Peanut said that he is also a ventriloquist....he talked without moving his mouth....My brother..he is 15...he asked me how Peanut can talk without moving his mouth...
I went to the store looking for plungers, went to one of the employees and asked where the plumbers were.😐
Bawahahahahaha there is just no accounting for the absolute stupidity of some people!!
When I was a kid, I would ask for a hamburger without the brown bit (I don't eat beef)
I worked with a girl that made a phone call on speaker and the line rang 'busy'. So she just let it "beep beep beep' and finally I said to her " ffs hang up" . She replied " well they have to answer eventually". #FacePalm. She also asked if we file by date or by alphabet. The file cabinet had folders from A to Z. She was definitely a source of entertainment.
So sick of the ads constantly covering these entries, one after another. I click skip and they open up. Ruining the fun of being here. These were enjoyable.
My uncle told us kids that when the trees wave their arms, it makes the wind blow. Still makes sense to me!
A girl and I were talking about our favourite diwali crackers to which she said,she only liked the diwali cracker roll toy gun as it is eco-friendly and harmless.Speaking of which I remembered a riddle and riddled her telling it's a riddle, here it goes: me: A man shot a woman but she didn't die or (was hurt) ,how? she:*thinks for a moment* well,she would have dodged the bullet or he would have missed her. me:(smiles at her satisfyingly) no,he shot her with a camera ;) she:yeah,obviuously he would have missed her with that camera shaped gun.Duh. I am not sure if she was refering to a sniper rifle because at that time I didn't have any idea about it and was very much content with a camera being the answer.
As late as yesterday, on the train, I overheard a woman speaking to her boyfriend and complaining how slow the train was moving. Then she said "I should have waited the 5 minutes to the next train from another company." Yep, love, that's how rails work...
To be fair it can work like that. Not all routes are single but can have multiple tracks for different speed trains. You can get stoping trains, so-called because they stop at every station, and fast trains that only stop at the main stations. My nearest station taking the fast train, which will pass the slow, can trim 35 minutes off a journey.
Load More Replies...I am always putting items down and not remembering where I put them. Bought a key holder, so that takes care of car keys. Have two pair of sun glasses and leave one in each car, so that takes care of that. BUT, I can NEVER find the tv clicker. Well, a friend of mine bought me a device that is a clicker for tiny clickers that you stick on things you are always "losing" like the clicker. I just looked at her and said "how in the hell am I going to remember where I put the master clicker for all the other clickers if I can't remember where the tv clicker is? A clicker is a clicker.
When i was 5 i actually thought that babies burst out of the stomach, and that was how they were born.
My daughter, now 20, up until a couple years ago thought the percent of weather was the actual amount, not the potential. Like, 10% - no worries; 100% - better buy a boat.
When I was little, I believed that criminals were executed by letting them be the bad guys shot or hanged on "Gunsmoke". Grandma just laughed, but never corrected me.
It's funny how people tell stories about other people, but then feel the need to mention that the other person is, in fact, very smart. Who cares? First of all, anybody can have a dumb moment. Also, I don't know you. I don't know the person you are talking about... So why bother?
I get what you're saying, but I understand it, I think. What people say can affect how they themselves think. They want to include the fact that it was just a dumb moment or that sort of thing as saying it aloud reinforces that they do in fact not hold it against the person. Also, posting on the internet, it might get back to the person they are talking about.
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