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Hospitals, dental practices – most of you will agree that visiting these kinds of places is far from fun. 

Perhaps it's the people in scrubs or that overly clean medical smell that gives you the heebie-jeebies – whatever it is, the whole process can be pretty stress-inducing. 

Moreover, if you've ever been scheduled for surgery, there could've been a certain little thing that you were probably anticipating with immense dread – and that's anesthesia. 

“Anesthesiologists, what is something you won’t forget hearing from someone that was under?” – this netizen turned to one of Reddit’s most informative communities, wondering what crazy things patients under procedural sedation have said. The post has managed to receive nearly 45K upvotes in just a day, as well as 12.3K comments sharing chucklesome stories. 

More info: Reddit

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#1

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I was coming out of the fog of anesthesia from a colonoscopy. Apparently I didn’t recognize my wife and refused her affections, telling her she was pretty, but I was married.

Got big brownie points for that.

angryshark , Eric Fleming Report

Final score:
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#2

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Was under anesthesia for a breast reduction. As I was coming out, my nurse was talking to me and apparently I started saying “omg it’s an angel and she looks like Barbie!” I kept yelling for Barbie Angel and possibly kept trying to hug her and pet her hair. I cried for her on the way home.

She called to check on me later that night and referred to herself as Nurse Barbie Angel. She was the sweetest.

OHManda30 , Eirien Report

Final score:
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#3

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I was under general anesthesia to get my gall bladder removed. As I was being wheeled back through the double doors there was a giant tv screen that listed the surgeries going on. I was way too loopy to actually read it but I swear I saw “Elbow-ectomy” and started hysterically laughing over the idea of removing an elbow and being left with a floppy arm. Apparently what I actually said was “elbooow jellooooo” and then passed out.

happethottie , Quinn Dombrowski Report

Final score:
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#4

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Apparently when I was going under I told the anesthesiologist, “don’t mess this up, I know where you work”.

SpazSpazBoBaz , Toshiyuki IMAI Report

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#5

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group My husband was put under to get his wisdom teeth out. He was a little anxious and also is just kind of a**l (he's an engineer), so he read is pre-op instructions front to back like a dozen times. One of the things it said was "you may experience profound disorientation upon awakening." As he woke up, he opened one eye and looked around the room, then said extremely huffily "I wouldn't call this PROFOUND." Then he started crying.

PictureSarah , Ace Armstrong Report

Final score:
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Your Neighborhood Alien
Your Neighborhood Alien
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Another story that was a comment on OP's that's adorable: "I had mine out in a hospital (tachycardia concerns) and I was given TWO Ativan to calm me. It made me uncharacteristically revealing about my feelings. So as my bed was being wheeled down to the Operating Room we came across two nurses walking by, and I asked them earnestly, “I know I’m a great big guy and full grown man, but would someone hold my hand …I’m just a little nervous.” Those two nurses both put down their stuff and reached for my hands. They held them all the way into the OR and put extra blankets from the warmer to make sure I felt at ease. They even searched me out later in Post Op to check on me. That response, their sincere kindness, was a true revelation to me and ever since that day — I’ve been unafraid to show my genuine emotion and feelings with others. It’s made life immeasurably better."

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#6

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I gave a patient an IV dose of ketamine for a pain procedure. He proceeded to tell the room that everyone had turned into cartoon characters and then he announced he was melting into a wall of butter. Still my finest achievement as a physician...

CockeyedGunslinger , Dwayne Madden Report

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to old to care
to old to care
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My sister got ketamine when she fell and broke her hip - she kept getting mad that micky mouse was eating her ice cream cone.(she was 61 at the time) The paramedics were in stitches.

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#7

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I woke up singing the *magic school bus* theme song while someone 3 beds away was screaming in agony

hairybackdave , South Carolina ETV; Nelvana; Scholastic Productions Report

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Unnamed Hooman
Unnamed Hooman
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Cruising down on main street, we’re relaxed and feelin good…

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#8

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group A girl woke up and asked if she had been hit by a train and then when asked if she knew why she was there she looked down and patted her chest and said implants. She was having her ACL repaired and her mom was there. (It was me, I was 19, I've never lived it down.)

AmandaDarlingInc , Docteur Spitalier Philippe Report

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#9

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group My wife was all doped up during her c-section and asked the anesthesiologist, "did they cut me open yet?" He calmly told her they did. To which she replied, "awwwww s**t", with a huge grin on her face. The Dr. and I lost it.

Hitman0355 , Jeena Paradies Report

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#10

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Nurse here, was 22F - had a teen boy come out of anesthesia who looked at me and said ‘heyyy you’re the girl from last night!’ - I had to reassure everyone that THAT WASN’T ME!

aWormhatForVermhat Report

Final score:
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#11

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I'm sure the anesthesiologist that did my son's dental surgery will never forget him. Specifically, because he came out after the fact clearly trying very hard not to laugh to tell my wife about it.

Kiddo was just chatting away while he was getting ready. Now my son is autistic and at the time had a very... Distinct way of speaking and pattern of emphasis along with a lisp. I literally cannot translate how he sounded talking into text.

Anyway, just as they're getting ready to put him under he goes. "You're gonna need some hard core night time medicine cuz I have ADHD and-" out, practically snoring even. They get to work, finish up and pull the mask off him. The literal second the mask was off his nose he bolts upright and finishes his sentence from however long earlier. "That stuff don't work good on me."

kosandeffect , Presidencia de la República Mexicana Report

Final score:
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K W
K W
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son got laughing gas for his first dental filling appointment. I was super jealous because I'm terrified of the dentist and have never been offered it. I asked him how he felt afterward and he said he didn't feel any different at all lol. Hard to tell because he often sounds like a chatty curmudgeony old man (like Walter Matthau in Grumpy Old Men), and that was pretty much how he reacted to the laughing gas.

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#12

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group My husband had his acl and meniscus repaired. When they brought him back into the room, he stared at me through half closed eyes until the nurses left and then said, "I love you. I'm glad you're here." I melted. Then he conked back out for about half an hour and woke up with a big gasp (I thought he was in pain, that's how loud it was) and went, "BURGER KING BURGEEEEERRRRRR." I said, "you want a burger King burger?" He said "I doooooooo!" So I had to get him a burger King burger for dinner. He doesn't remember anything until he was back home several hours later with burger King sitting in front of him. Lol

GreenOnionCrusader , Mike Mozart Report

Final score:
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#13

My aunt, who notoriously despises fast food (old Mexican lady whose food is as good as it gets) woke up and looked at my uncle and said, “are you the sexy man that’s gonna take me to McDonald’s?” If you knew her you would know that she would NEVER say that. She has never lived it down.

jay_skrilla Report

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#14

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group My mom woke up from dental surgery and when we were leaving the surgeon's office, he gave her a "goodie bag" with floss and a toothbrush and stuff, and the whole way home she kept asking if she could eat the candy that the dentist gave her. Every time I told her there was no candy, she looked so heartbroken, like a little kid when their goldfish dies or something

Then we stopped at CVS on the way home and she wandered off. I found her in the candy aisle holding a giant bag of fun sized candy and when I told her to put it back on the shelf she dropped it on the floor and galloped away laughing at me

Almost__A__Haiku , Upupa4me Report

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#15

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Anesthesiologist here. For better or for worse, I’m a big Green Bay Packers fan, so I wear a scrub cap with the Packers name/colors on it.

I was doing a pre-op evaluation on a kid who was a big New Orleans Saints fan, and when I walked into the room, his first words to me were “Packers Suck.” I laughed and continued to get him prepare him and his family for his redo open heart surgery procedure.

Fast forward to surgery a couple days later, and his mom had come back to the OR as he was going to sleep. Given the fact this was a 3 or 4 time redo sternotomy (going into the chest again), he had a higher risk of major complications from the surgery.

I started to push some meds to have him go to sleep while his mom was holding his hand, and as he drifted off, he said “Wait, I have to tell my mom something!” She got emotional saying how much she loved him, and we were all waiting to hear what he had to say so urgently.

I paused giving him the medication, but he was already well on his way to being under, and as he drifted off to sleep, he said “Packers suck.”

Kid did great, hope he is doing well :)

dhslax88 , Mike Morbeck Report

Final score:
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Persephone
Persephone
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Poor kid, that's so much to go thru with poor long term prognosis; but... Packers suck. 😆 I hope you are doing well sweetie!

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#16

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Was recently under for abdominal surgery. My partner of 17 years who I dearly love was the first face I remember seeing when coming out of anesthesia... I looked at him & said "who the f**k are you & why are you staring at me?" He's still laughing...

rockchalkjayhawk8082 , Joe Shlabotnik Report

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#17

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Patient here. Came out of anesthesia and heard gotye's "somebody that I used to know" playing in the recovery room. I asked my SO why they were playing it at like 10x the normal speed and the nurse just goes "ok so she's not ready to go home yet" lol

ArchangelEquinox , gotyemusic Report

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Nicky
Nicky
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I had my breast cancer surgery, I felt so great when I woke up that I asked the surgeon if she was sure that they remembered to do the operation.

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#18

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I got put under for my wisdom teeth at 17. When I came too the nurse or what ever was like “okay you’re probably a little groggy just sit tight for a while.” And I was like “F**K THAT I FEEL AMAZING!” And proceeded to swing my legs off the table which sent my top half spinning right after it and falling flat on my face.

People laughed. I remember the laughter.

solidSC , Lars Plougmann Report

Final score:
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#19

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I was told after surgery I said I love dogs and I want to eat the Taliban.

whitedragontail , Sean MacEntee Report

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Amy Adams
Amy Adams
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That is way better than saying you love the Taliban and you want to eat dogs.

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#20

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group As I put someone out for a colonoscopy one time, the patient said, “You’re cute. Are you gonna see my butt??” Then she was out.

cosmicencounter1 , Arkangel Report

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Remi (He/Him)
Remi (He/Him)
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why do hospitals and such keep putting people under for basic colonoscopy??? Watching your insides while mildly high is way less risky and kinda entertaining

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#21

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I was brought home after by my wife but was still loopy. She told the construction workers outside to make sure I didn’t leave the house. They let me help pour concrete and fixed what I f****d up. Nice guys. My daughter made them free lime aid so they were always cool with us.

ownersequity Report

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#22

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Patient here,
I was a teen. apparently before I went under I kept mumbling "it's buried don't worry, stop worrying it's buried it's buried it's gone"
My Mom was there & said the staff were eyeballing her uncomfortably and years later to this day every year she still asks me If remember anything? That If ever I need to talk she'll support me no matter what. I honestly do not know what I meant.

Successful_Ranger_19 , Eli DukeFollow Report

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#23

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group When coming to after surgery, I told my MIL that she was naughty and needed a spanking...

Lanndshark , Mark Ramsay Report

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#24

As a 17 year old i had a colonoscopy because GI doctors couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t go #2. I mention this as an important detail, because after the colonoscopy I was still very much under the anesthesia effects, loopy, and when my mom tried to offer saltines I started screaming “HOW MANY CALORIES DO THOSE THINGS HAVE” and my mom starts panicking like “calm down, lower your voice, people are gonna think you have an eating disorder or something” and I just said “I CAN’T TALK QUIET WHATS GOING ON”

The ironic thing, was I guess besides dysregulating my ability to control vocal volume, the anesthesia kind of acted like a truth serum in a way. No, no one found out I had an eating disorder until I almost died from it a year later, but I can’t believe that wasn’t taken into consideration as to why I couldn’t go to the bathroom. Can’t poop if you don’t eat

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Theo Blackwood
Theo Blackwood
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah the moment you mentioned the saltines, I could guess what was wrong. I hope you’re okay now.

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#25

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Am patient's relative rather than anaesthesiologist - but as he started going under, patient (hydraulics engineer) started trying to tell the dr what type of pump they should install to fix the busted blood vessel in his brain.

viking_knitter , Les Chatfield Report

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#26

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I was 17 at the time but got my wisdom teeth taken out. Everything went as planned, but I woke up and remember seeing the oral surgeon. Me, being dosed with grade A giggle juice and having no idea wtf I was doing, asked her if she would like to grab boba sometime. I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life…

5 years later: she let me shadow for part of my dental school shadowing requirement and is giving me a LOR for applications next cycle…not a boba date but all things considered, she was a great mentor

Sonny_Ballins , cezzie901 Report

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Rachknits
Rachknits
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Similar experience here - when I was in labour with my son I was given pethidine which made me feel drunk. I remember there was a junior doctor there looking on for experience. I thought he was kind of cute so tried chatting him up while lying down with my legs in stirrups with all, as it were, on display. After my son was born and the drugs had worn off I was a little embarrassed to say the least! Good on him tho as he was very good natured about it.

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#27

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Not the anesthesiologist, but as a surgery tech working next to them:

**Patient, woozily:** “Doc, will I still be able to integrate after this?”
**Gas passer:** “Integrate? Like what?”
**Patient:** “Like the sum of f(x) from a to b when…”
**Gas passer:** _pushes more milk of amnesia_

GummyKibble , Robert Couse-Baker Report

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#28

Patient here. I was getting my wisdom teeth out, and before I went under I told them that bananas are radioactive. When I woke up, I proceeded to repeat that several times and explain radioactivity.

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#29

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I had a surgery to remove bone spurs from my big toes in early February of 2005. I woke up while the doctor was grinding the bone down and asked if he thought Donovan McNabb could lead the Eagles to a Superbowl win. He nodded at the anesthesiologist and I don't remember anything after that.

The_Spyre , Rachel Lynne Smith Report

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#30

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group One guy said, before falling asleep, “whoa! That feels like a dime bag.”

Any_Move , Maja Dumat Report

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#31

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group Surgeon told me that I kept them all laughing through my facial surgery. They had to keep giving me more anesthetic to shut me up, which is probably why I was sick as a dog afterwards. I pressed him hard for details but he refused to tell me what I'd said.

cutelyaware , nosha Report

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#32

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group My son, then 10 or so, was coming to after being under when getting his broken wrist set and casted. They had to do traction to get everything aligned or something. There were quite a few people in the room, but his drugged self directed all his attention to me. He was describing Big Daddy from Bioshock and kept repeating, "Dad, you know! You know what I'm talking about!" because I couldn't think of the name of the game at the time. Then he gets frustrated and yells at me, "You son of a b***h!" Lots of laughs from the hospital staff.

perturbeaux , Matt McDaniel Report

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Lakota Wolf
Lakota Wolf
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bioshock 2 gave me the most feels of any video game I've ever played. SUCH a good game. Gorgeous graphics, perfect atmosphere, stunning writing/plot. The first Bioshock game was pretty darn good too. And then 2K Games crapped the bed and released Bioshock Infinite :')

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#33

30 Funny Things Patients Said While Loopy On Anesthesia, As Shared In This Online Group I have had to get colonscopies every couple years since I was 24, so I've gone under quite a bit for someone my age.

Every time, when I wake up, I'm crying, and a nurse is comforting me. They say I don't tell them why I'm upset, but I'm weeping every damn time. It has gotten to the point where I warn the nurses I'll be sobbing, but to not take it too seriously.

Anyone else have this???

EastSideTilly , Anders Ljungberg Report

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Miz Chelle
Miz Chelle
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do!!!!! I have had several shoulder surgeries and they give me a nerve block so I can't feel anything in my arm. But, even though there is no pain, I cry hysterically for a few hours after waking up.

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