I apologize as this is going to be a long post. Ok for context, I’m a Filipino currently living in the US. For Filipinos like me here in Bored Panda, they would know that in the Philippines a girl’s 18th birthday party, or debut, as we call it, is a huge deal. So much like a Quinceañera.

I have this cousin on my father’s side, Me-Ann, whose daughter just celebrated her debut. Beautiful ball gown, nice venue, great decor, music, food, the whole nine yards. Lots of guests. I just found out about it when they posted pictures on Facebook.

The thing that hurt was when I asked my sister, who is in the Philippines, if she was invited to that party. She said no. Not one of them thought of it, not even a half-assed invitation. I know my sister, she’s not close to them as I am with them. Even if she was invited, she wouldn’t go bc she doesn’t like going out. She’s a homebody. But my point is, it’s the thought that counts.

I grew up in that side of the family. I call my aunts and uncles mama and papa. Even after my parents separated when I was four. Through thick and thin, I stood by them, to the point my mom even said I treat them more like family than her (which isn’t true but not the point). I help/ed them without expecting anything in return, be it monetary or otherwise. Birthdays, christmases I always gift them something. When said cousin told me she needs my help as she was diagnosed with stage 1 breast cancer, she didn’t have to say it twice. Helped her with bills and meds, etc. All without my husband’s knowledge. Bc what can I say, they’re my family. Through the years I have supported them in any way I can. When I got married, I wanted them to be in my wedding and I paid for everything bc I knew they can not afford to attend. There were a lot more I did for them.

So I was hurt when I found out that they didn’t even shoot my sister a Facebook message or text to invite her to said debut. I confronted my cousin about it. She said she was busy and in a lot of stress bc she had surgery twice and was in and out of the hospital, that they church they belong to contributed/donated a lot to make that party happen. She even said that she wasn’t sure there will even be a party bc of all the stuff that’s going on with her. I was so hurt and felt like she insulted my intelligence so I asked if what she’s telling me is that that party was a last minute kind of thing. She couldn’t answer that. She did apologize. But I was hurt, still am to be honest. I just said it’s ok. I understand. But what’s done is done. I apologized for all the things I said then blocked her and her whole family on Facebook.

Am I wrong to feel this way?

PS. I apologize for typos and grammatical errors. English is not my first language.