There is a saying, "Two wrongs don't make a right." If it was wrong (and it was) for the children to cut the flowers in this person's garden, it was also wrong for this person to do the same thing. Instead of solving the problem there's at least 5 angry people. This was not handled well.

It was stupid of the mothers to say anything except making the kids (pre-teens/NOT children) apologize and/or reimbursing you for the flowers lost. And yes, that was petty of you to cut up another's flowers instead of using your words. I'm all for pettiness, but I don't think anyone learned anything here.

I'm going to probably have an unpopular opinion, but not the AH. A different saying applies here, no not an eye for an eye. The saying I'm thinking of treat others the way you want to be treated. If this lady allows her kids to just continue treating people's property like this and blame you for it, not to mention the foul language of her and her kids, then she shouldn't be surprised if one day her flowers disappear, or the family van has a single nail in the tire. Two rights don't make a wrong, but if the other party doesn't play that same rulebook you're not entitled to either. I will say as long as no one gets hurt, in this scenario you're NOT the AH.

As a fellow gardener, I get it, I really do, but...OP shouldn't have done it.

Petty, but I'm here for it. People think their kids can do no wrong, but I've worked in a middle school and their kids are NOT, in fact, angels. Tell them to go pick flowers in their own yards! This is why there is no village anymore. No one wants to confront s****y parents because it's a pain to teach grown adults how to be respectful of others instead of raising entitled twats like themselves. Stop enabling them!

People are talking about disproportional response. I have yet to hear any constructive alternatives.

I'm not saying OP was right, but what did those mothers and children expect? Just imagine if those kids grow up to talk like that to someone and get themselves stabbed or shot or something. It will come back and bite you in the @$$. They should consider themselves lucky it was just their garden that got vandalized out of retaliation.

Appalling behaviour from an adult.

Valuable lesson for the mothers, they obviously don't know that a parents only job is to teach their children to live in society. Now they know.

ESH -- They shouldn't have cut your flowers or sworn at you (BTW, most teens do know swear words) and the teen years is too old for the "they're just children" excuse, but doing it back was way too petty and extreme.

I'm honestly curious what a good alternative for her would have been? I understand her horror at how this was handled, but it really does cause a war now between neighbors. I think there could be an alternative solution but it sounds like she responded in anger rather than finding out what a good legal and responsible option would be. Perhaps install security cameras or call the non emergency hotline and say that children are abusing people's flowers. I could get grief about this but the author is wanting to know if they handled it properly and I don't see any comments saying much for alternative options so I'm curious - anyone else got any ideas on how to take the high road but still set up a boundary line to hold to?.

uggh, that was kinda annoying to read, always switching between the normal text and the titles for the pics.

NTA. At first I thought so until you described the bounty of expensive florals at these children's homes. Which they did Not pick (I wonder why). I have seen a good standard of entitlement as being: if you need to travel somewhere to behave in ways that arent acceptable at home (skateboards in the cul de sac rather than your own driveway, littering in the park, picking flowers at someone's house) then You are not the a*****e. I hope you saved every flower to compensate. Their flowers will grow back after your pruning, yours are annuals.

They had no respect the parents had no respect. Talking it out obviously wasn’t going to work. She could have called the police because technically it’s theft and vandalism. Now they know how it feels hopefully they will put in end to it before it goes farther. A toddler I get oh it’s a kid though you still teach right from wrong . My daughter stole a troll at age one, or tried 2. The she’s a child only went so far. That was her first lesson. She had to wait a week to get that troll as at that point I couldn’t very well buy it for her. Teaching starts from the cradle on

Two wrongs don't make a right but in this one I agree with the OP. The mother's should have NEVER approached OP that way. It's a lesson no one will forget for a while.

Unless they know it was you and why you did it (and it's still wrong and yes YTA) you didn't even accomplish anything or teach anything. This world is so sad because people simply refuse to even try communicating with words ever.

Omg adults playing toddlers, parents of children need to teach the kids that other people's property is not their to take. Op is a huge huge A, I wouldn't be surprised if the mothers talked to the police about the vandalism. Not a good look at all

Nta let thm fully understand how they made you feel

YTA. Don't be surprised if those kids come back to retaliate now that you've gone after their moms. Please consider growing up.

YTA. An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind.

Usually petty revenge is something I agree with, but cutting someone's flowers maliciously like that is one that doesn't fly with me.

Screw that. Nta . I would've done the same. I'm really tired of these entitled mothers raising entitled children. They just continue to get away with this type of behavior . That's how bullys operate. Entitled women are just mean girls all grown up. I was friends with the mean girls, and no one stood up to them . Now they're just entitled women raising children who do s**t just.like.this. I'm civil with these women, and as much as they try , I keep them at arms length.

I would worry about them retaliating. They obviously have no boundaries

Retaliating is only going to worsen the issue. The kids and the parents are never going to learn because they just don't care. I just don't believe in starting range wars. Build a fence with a attack dog and believe me that will solve the problem if they trespass on your property. Also put up a sign. Vicious dog on premises so that they are warned ahead of time and will have no excuses. Hopefully this will solve the problem.

No, no this is not ok in my opinion. Plants and flowers are living things... yeah, i would also be very angry if someone cuts my flowers. But, as someone who loves plants, I couldnt cut so many other flowers just to get a revenge. This is not "the godfather" where a son´s killing is payed with a son´s killing. Acting Mafia-like is not ok. And they flowers didnt do anything to anyone! It´s like saying: you killed my dog so I´m killing yours! and then you make it very clear that you love dogs. doubble-standard is the name of this game.

Sure the parents clearly didn't teach going into other people's property and tearing the flowers is unacceptable but you are a grown up. Who needs kids making mistakes when there are adults who take petty revenge on psycho mode. Yes, you were wrong for what you did to their yard. You said your peace to the parents and kids. They may not have liked it but you made it clear. If anything I would have sent them a bill and taken pictures of the kids and parents during the whole thing in case I needed proof for legal reasons. What you did could turn this around on you, and worse. Everyone makes mistakes it's how we learn or improve. Seriously, how old are you that you think what you did even comes close to a mistake by kids

If it's not okay for them to do it, it's not okay for you to do it. YTA

It would have been better to put a sign in her yard saying "Free flowers! U-pick!"

Not the best move... Usually im down to read about MC stuff but this is just being TA.. no offense but that's more messed up than the kids ruining your flowers OP.

Most AITAH are retaliation porn anyway...

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So, basically, you're admitting to committing a crime. YTA. You're older than 12. If they should know better, what about you?

You are worse than those kids were, as an adult not only do you know way better. You showed those kids it’s ok to destroy someone property. Nothing has been solved and now they know its ok to be the bigger bully

Not necessarily condoning but. . . I'm going against the grain here but boy I bet it felt good. Why do I get the feeling this wasn't the first time something of this nature has happened with these families in the neighborhood, most people are not going to retaliate so fully over a 1st or single incident ( and talking was probably done then). And for that matter, the flower picking, when not in your own yard is vandalism as well,is it not? I bet the mothers will take a little more notice of what their kids are up to, never had a care about where those picked flowers bouquets were coming from before, did they? Bet you been getting more smiles and neighborly nods since you did it too haven't you LoL?

Approve of the revenge, but you are not a 12 YO. You have now become the "target" of 3 hormonal teenagers and they will be there until after they graduate College. I really wouldn't plan on having any sort of foliage out front and they will find ways to make your life he double hockey sticks. I know because I was once 12 and had an a*****e neighbor that my mom was fighting with over a drainage ditch. We terrorized the poor guy till he moved. Everything from ding dong ditching with the poop bags to launching bottle rockets at his front door. Halloween was also interesting and as his back yard backed to the forest, We pretty much had free reign to cause chaos and me mum backed us every single time... Just saying this was not the way...

Yta, not a little one either. As the adult you are worse than the kids who were taking your flowers for themselves. You taught them that its ok to destroy other peoples property