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You want to know the one truth I’ve learned in all my years? Life’s too hard to face sober.” – Octieve San, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.

There, I helped! [smug face]

In all seriousness, getting advice is always helpful. Yes, it should be taken with a grain of salt, and not all advice is necessarily great or even decent. But even if it is crummy advice, it might just help put things into perspective, or give you a reason to laugh about it. So, win-win.

And maybe these tips from Reddit might be of use to you as older generations (everyone over 40) share the pearls of wisdom they’ve acquired throughout the years with the younger peeps of the internets.

More Info: Reddit

#1

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds I’m not quite 40, but my advice is: get the f**k off TikTok

BobBelcher2021 , Solen Feyissa Report

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hitex
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

PLEASE! Tiktok is the pits & provides your info & data to third parties & China

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#2

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds 40 isn't old

tralphaz43 , Maria Helena Mazuroski Report

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XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just turned 38, and I am steady trying to pump the breaks every day. lol But, my older brother just turned 40 and he's out there climbing mountains and entering triathlons so...yeah, I guess you're really only as old as you feel.

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#3

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Don't fall into the trap of thinking everyone else your age has something that you don't and you feel hopelessly behind and like a failure.

Once you're out of school, there are no timelines anymore. You are not supposed to do anything by any particular point in your life. Everyone is different.

You are not supposed to have had X number of sexual partners, had X number of relationships, be married, have a kid, own a house, have a dream job, or figure out your calling in life at any particular point - if at all.

Life is very long and you will have many chances to do things.

Make your own path.

zazzlekdazzle , Einar Storsul Report

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StrangeOne
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even when you're in school, all those timelines (not mistaken for the work deadlines.) are not made in stone. Some people graduate early, some at 18, some at 21 or older. There are people who've never graduated and get on better than someone who went to university. There is no real deadline in going back to school for anything. Your timeline is the time you're alive.

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#4

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds You're not special, no one cares what you do and the sooner you can accept it, the sooner you can be at peace with yourself.

Anom8675309 , Christopher Sardegna Report

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Meowzers!
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You are not special. You're not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We're all part of the same compost heap. We're all singing, all dancing cr@p of the world. (Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club)

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#5

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Stretch everyday or at least more then never. Stay limber and flexible because once it is gone, it’s almost impossible to get it back.

jjovenr , Tamba Budiarsana Report

Bored Panda got a chance to speak to one of the submitters in the original post, and that is u/unabtaniuam.

In their submission, unabtaniuam took a very zen approach to advice, pointing out a number of universal, yet spot-on truths: life is short, be grateful, and learn to live in the present for the past is a mere memory now and the future is only up to our imagination at this point.

They cap off their thoughts by saying that folks, instead of accepting negative self dialogue, ought to observe so as to learn from it. In turn, "you are braver than you believe, smarter than you think, stronger than you seem and loved more than you know."

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#6

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds You aren't going to get rich as an influencer or become a professional gamer. Get educated and get a job.

stumpytoesisking , Axville Report

#8

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds It’s okay and healthy to sit in silence. Put down your phone, leave your earphones in your pocket, and just be. It’s important to not constantly be stimulated.

yourpaljax , Andrew Measham Report

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Mrs Irish Mom
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Love a good quiet walk with the dog at 6am its so peaceful and quiet and i dont listen to music until my 6pm walk because thats so noisy

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#9

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Don't cheap out on a mattress, pillows or shoes.
Cut back on the sugar.
Do NOT bring work home with you.

bastardo1313 , Tim Samuel Report

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DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes to the sugar, I learnt the work thing by force and about to order a mattress lol

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#10

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Cut s****y people out fast with a sharp knife. There are so many f*****g people on this planet, why give second chances? Also, family are friends you didn't get to decide to bring into your life, but should be held to the same expectations as non family members. So many toxic family members saying "but were family..."

burningpetrol , Annushka Ahuja Report

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In our interview with u/unabtaniuam, they elaborated that their advice comes from a difficult time, one that involved overcoming an addiction on their own.

"This is what helped me pull out of the lows in my life. I’ve always been pretty positive and had a deep understanding that there is more to life than the daily trivialities. Who helped? Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts and Ram Dass. Spiritual gurus and yogis."

#11

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Avoid "toxic positivity" people. Actually, try to avoid all toxic people, "toxic positivity" is just a bit harder to recognise. It is ok to be not in a mood sometimes.

Ehehehen321 , Amadeo Valar Report

#12

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Take photos around where you live; streets, buildings, forests, etc. Because everything will look different in 20 years.

zook54 , Bảo Minh Report

#13

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Don’t waste time being the person other people think you should be, and instead be the person you want to be

GrimeyScorpioDuffman , Kamaji Ogino Report

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#14

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Love life it is short. Be grateful for everything. The biggest burden you’ll carry are your own thoughts. Learn to live in the present, the past is just a memory and the future is just your imagination. You don’t have to accept the negative self dialogue, be the watcher of those thoughts and learn to let them go. You are braver than you believe, smarter than you think, stronger than you seem and loved more than you know.

unabtaniuam , Марина Вотинцева Report

#15

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Save your money

Coldeethel , Karolina Grabowska Report

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DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, yes and yes...but don't hoard either. Enjoy life too, just be financially responsible.

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u/unabtaniuam focuses on a number of themes in their original thought: life and death, the burdens of time, thoughts, and negativity, just to name a few. But, according to them, the key is here is to tackle the negative and the critical.

"The critical judge in your head does not tell the truth and it does not have your best interest at heart. Recognize it and don’t accept it."

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This then ties in well with the idea of observing it and learning from it, all the while negating its influence over the mind.

#16

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Your dreams are not static. It's ok to decide the dream you had at 15 is no longer for you

DonnaJScot , Amina Filkins Report

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hitex
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I 1st wanted to be engineer at NASA - dream changed to patent lawyer to help small inventors - dream dissolved but what to do? Got a job at small law office, took the divorce & custody cases they didn't want & now have a successful family law practice. I love my job. So yes, let your life experiences modify your dreams. You'll never know where it takes you. No child or young adult says 'I want to be a divorce/custody lawyer' - but it's the most fulfilling career I would ever imagine

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#17

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Don’t “wait to get in shape”

Start working out however is enjoyable to you so you avoid health risks later. Don’t wait to have to lose 30 lbs

STARoSCREAM , Fortune Vieyra Report

#18

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Take care of your teeth. It's nice to have high standards, but it's even better to have a friend with you and not be alone.

VapoursAndSpleen , Shiny Diamond Report

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Manatee
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tooth pain is a hell you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. Heed this advice

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#19

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds I'm 56. You don't have as much time as you think you do. Don't waste it, don't waste a single f****** day. Do something everyday even if it's just something for yourself. Drink plenty of water and use sunscreen. Donating blood doesn't hurt that bad. Doing something you like for a living is more rewarding than doing something that pays even exceptionally well. I've done both and the former is preferable in my opinion. I'm rambling too much coffee😳😳

TimRenick , Szűcs László Report

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Nikki Sevven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not sure about that last one. For me, the instant I monetize an interest, my interest starts to fade until every scrap of joy I once experienced while pursuing that interest has disappeared. You pursue an interest because you WANT to. When you monetize it, you are now forced to pursue it. Maybe it's just me, but I think I would grow to hate the thing I once loved.

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#20

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Fail more.

Fail all the time.

Set yourself up for failure.

Because what you will learn is that failure is not some horrible catastrophe, it's actually a part of a process of getting better at something or getting what you want. And going ahead into failure is often how you find yourself unexpectedly succeeding faster than you expected.

And the more you fail, the more you immunize yourself against the fear of it so you can get more of it. Failure is something you actually *need* in your life to really get the things you want.

zazzlekdazzle , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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Nikki Sevven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You need to think of failure as simply data gathering. You only failed because you lacked sufficient data. The makers of Formula 409 failed 408 times and kept at it, gathering data until they were able to succeed.

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Lastly, we asked if giving advice, whether to young folk, or anyone, really, is truly challenging. And u/unabtaniuam pointed out a concept that's very true with a lot of folks:

"I have found it is easy for me to give good advice from the heart. But at the same time hard for me to follow it for myself."

There is this idea that it can be difficult to follow your own advice because you are much closer to your own problems. And so, not only are you more aware of the context and nuances of it all, but your emotions are often also more powerful in clouding your judgment. But advice for others comes easier and more naturally as we are more distant from these factors, and thus can approach it with a clearer mind.

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#21

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds 1. Upvotes and thumbsup from social media doesn't matter. Your job title on LinkedIn doesn't matter. **Like nobody cares.** Your children won't care, your loved ones won't care, your gravestone won't say anything about it.
2. Don't think you are the be all and end all when it comes to trends and social knowledge. 20 years from now your children will look back upon you as savages. This happens every generation. Think about context before you judge others.
3. One person already said it, **but don't think you are so special**. The trends of parents over the past 20-30 years (saying you are perfection) isn't helping you. Work hard, live a good life -- be kind to others, admit your mistakes. (Aside: I have two kids and worked really hard to make them feel loved while simultaneously making sure they take responsibility for their actions)

LionAndLittleGlass , Austin Distel Report

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Nikki Sevven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If your kids mock your "outdated" clothes, ignore it and wait. Within 10 years, they'll be stealing those same clothes from your closet, as they've become fashionable again. I'm 58 and I've seen the following trends reappear multiple times: platform shoes, bellbottoms, mini-skirts, maxi-shirts, belly shirts, low rise pants, mom jeans, overalls, jumpsuits, rompers, bodysuits, over-the-knee boots, ankle boots, middle part, side part, blunt cut, layered cut...I could go on.

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#22

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds You know that dream that seems nuts to pursue?

Do it now.

When you’re old, with a house and a mortgage and a dog, s**t like “I want to make a movie” get much more complicated

FreshlyWritten69 , Anthony Da Cruz Report

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Nikki Sevven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I wish I'd done that when I had the chance" is an infinitely more painful regret than "I wish I'd never done that."

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#23

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Dull answers, but genuine ones:
- put more into your pension than you are now
- avoid debt where you can
- don't hold grudges
- look after your health
- learn to enjoy the now
- be nice to your parents. They might be d***s, but you'll probably still miss them

Myjazzysocks , Dylan Gillis Report

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Ace
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes to all but the last one. They were never a part of my life after age 15 or so, don't miss them at all now they're gone.

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#24

People at work are not your friend! Even if they're nice to you.

Dense_Letterhead_248 Report

#25

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Enjoy your hairline/boobs, they aren't going to get better and you will fondly look back on where they were situated when you were younger and hotter.

Smyley12345 , Karolina Grabowska Report

#26

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Keep at a healthy weight/fitness level, and do more now than sitting around waiting for later.

CalabreseAlsatian , Alexandra Lowenthal Report

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#27

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Stop. You won't ever be the perfect image of yourself in your head

atorifan , Frans van Heerden Report

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Dumpster Fire
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm actually trying to be the WORST image of myself in my head. So far, I'm succeeding.

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#28

Once you're out of school, don't keep the friends who bring you down, You really don't need that and the benefits no longer outweigh the drawbacks.

You know what I mean, the friends who only call when they need something, the ones who make you feel bad when you fail and worse when you succeed. The friends who encourage you to do things you actually don't want to do and discourage you from growing as a person.

Focus your time and effort on your high-quality friends. It's not about quantity anymore.

zazzlekdazzle Report

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Mighty_Condor (He/Him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do this before you leave school, you don't need that in addition to the stresses of school

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#29

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Keep active and eat well.

Basic advice can be trickier to implement than it seems. The path of least resistance is to grab the soda on the end cap at the store and to skip the gym because you're tired today. And it's really easy to rationalize *just for today* without recognizing what's become a pattern.

It always seems like there's tomorrow until the body gives out, and once that happens it can be a vicious cycle. Have seen people's knees start to go by their mid-twenties. Have seen people go through three back surgeries in their thirties. Have seen heart attacks end it before age fifty.

So two tips:

Find a sport you really enjoy. Once you find the sport you love, dig into the wallet for good equipment. This isn't a frivolous expense: it's an investment in yourself.

Learn to cook from scratch. You don't have to graze on "superfoods" from kale to purple cauliflower to whatever else is the fad this year. Instead, eat mostly healthful things and go light on the treats. This shouldn't feel blah: if something tastes like cardboard then don't eat it. Just aim for a reasonable balance and try to make the reasonable stuff tasty.

doublestitch , Gabin Vallet Report

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Scotira
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

🤣 every time kale is mentioned as superfood I'm like "what?" To me kale has always been a staple 😅 comes from living in Northern Germany as child. Everytime I want to buy it here in Switzerland it comes in 300g packages and is expensive as heck 🙄 wtf do I do with 300g anyway? Edit: sorry, bit off topic 😇

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#30

30 “I Wish I Knew This Earlier” Blunt, Yet Honest Pieces Of Advice From 40+-Year-Olds Don't take yourself too seriously, whatever you do you'll probably look back ten years later mildly mortified at how deep you thought you were.

You're just another confused human not destined for greatness and there's no grand scheme in which you matter one bit, so just chill.

If you have issues with your self confidence and depend on the validation of others, adress that s**t by whatever means are available to you. Nobody is going to do it for you and being insecure gets old fast.

Take care of your health. Wear sunscreen.

StrangeArcticles , Caroline Veronez Report

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