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If you’re into some classic jokes, then we do have a selection for you! Reading this list with your mother might not be the best idea (unless she’s an absolute menace and has some legendary-tier yo-mama jokes up her sleeve.) Yet, there are a lot of occasions when they will count as adult-only jokes, so tread carefully. However, if you have friends you know will love these, crack away!
While some people won’t find yo-mama jokes funny, there is also a group of people who crave some stomach-twirling two-liners. It’s hard to adapt these short jokes in a casual conversation. But if you do, it often turns into a competition to see who has the absolute best yo-mama jokes.
Some of these lines can be offensive but as is with taste, there can be a lot of opinions about it. So keep your mind open and remember, these are just funny jokes meant to pull your moods up, not down.
Dig in and prepare for this collection of the best yo-mama roasts on the planet. Vote for your favorites, expand your arsenal, and show your friends the winning roasts on the globe!
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#2
Yo mama's so fat, when God said, “Let there be light,” he asked her to move out of the way.
Dachshunds #1 2 years ago
"oh sorry can you move a lil bit to the right... now crouch down.... uhmmmm.... lay on the ground? now the plants can have light... nvm you squished them all-forget it
#3
Yo mama's so stupid when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.
#5
Yo mama's so old, she walked out of a museum and the alarm went off.
#6
Yo mama's so stupid, when I said, "Drinks on the house," she got a ladder.
#7
Yo mama's so short, you can see her feet on her driver's license.
When you hear a sentence starting with “yo mama…”, you might feel that a situation is about to turn from bad to worse. However, if you are a connoisseur of the ‘Your Dear Maman’ joke, you might have an inkling that a very well-thought-out and creative insult is about to see the light of day. In an even better case, you might hear a yo-mama joke so good that it’ll knock you out of your socks, blow your hair out, and leave you browless for the rest of your life.
#8
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."
Pranit Warrior 1 year ago
Yo mama so fat, when se checked her weight at the doctors clinic, doctor said, " I want to kno your weight, not your phone number "
#9
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
#10
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
#11
Yo mama's so ugly, she walked into a Haunted House and walked back out with a job application.
#12
Yo mama's so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
You might think that the “your mom” jokes originated somewhere in the past, together with the ‘90s comedies. However, there is indeed just one person responsible for creating this kind of corny joke. Would you be surprised if we told you it was the OG jokester William Shakespeare?
#14
Yo mama’s so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
#16
Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.
#17
Yo mama's so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Well, he did, and you can find the original “your mother” joke in Act 1 Scene 1 of Timon of Athens, where a character implies that his enemy’s Maman is, in fact, a female dog. So, the next time you feel the urge to use a “yer ma” joke, remember that it is a language tool created by only the most excellent writer ever. And there's no shame in joking around in the same way as he did!
#18
Yo mama's so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list.
#19
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
#20
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
#21
Yo mama's so stupid, she returned a doughnut because it had a hole in it.
#22
Yo mama's so fat, a vampire sucked her blood and got diabetes.
#23
Yo mama’s so fat, she goes to the car wash to take showers.
#24
Yo mama’s so dumb, it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
#25
Yo mama’s so old, her driver’s license got hieroglyphics on it.
#26
Yo mama’s so old, her birth certificate says expired on it.
#27
Yo mama’s so fat she takes selfies in panoramic mode.
#28
Yo mama’s so fat she had to have her baptism at sea world.
#30
Yo mama’s so fat, the last time she wore a Red Cross t-shirt, a helicopter tried to land in her.
Wang Zhuang 2 years ago
This joke was better when the Red Cross T-Shirt was a Malcolm X jacket lol
#31
Yo mama's so old that when she was in school, there was no history class.
cousin 4life 10 months ago
that would be great if i was yo mama because history calss was the worst when i went to school
#32
Yo mama so big, her belt size is "equator."
#33
Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
#34
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
#35
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
#36
Yo mama's so fat, she uses Google Earth to take a selfie.
Alison Shaw 9 months ago
We should all those overweight chicks who have their own TV shows to pick a spot in a neighborhood and take a pic standing right behind the curb ha ha
#38
Yo mama’s so dumb, she got fired from the M & M factory for throwing away all the W’s.
#39
Yo mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
#40
Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
#41
Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
#42
Yo mama's so dumb, she put a watch in a piggybank and said she was saving time.
#43
Yo mama's so dumb, when she heard about cookies on the Internet, she ate her computer.
#44
Yo mama's so ugly, she turned Medusa to stone.
#45
Yo mama's so ugly, when your dad drops her off for work, he gets a fine for littering.
#46
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow when she smiles at traffic, it slows down.
#47
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
#48
Yo mama's so stupid when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
#49
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
#50
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.
#51
Yo mama's so stupid, she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."
#52
Yo mama's so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
#53
Yo mama's so fat, if she was a Star Wars character, her name would be Admiral Snackbar.
#54
Yo mama's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.
#55
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND the house.
#56
Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her and my car and ran out of gas.
#57
Yo mama's so lazy she woke up from a coma and went to sleep.
#59
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner - and she looked.
#61
Yo mama's so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.
#62
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
#63
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
#64
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
RavenZero (they/them) 2 years ago
Funny story, one of my baby teeth had to get filled in twice, and it had a blueish color after. I was sad when I lost it
#66
Yo mama's so fat, when she got hit by a bus she asked, “Who threw that rock?”
#68
Yo mama’s house is so small that when she orders a large pizza, she has to go outside to eat it.
#69
Yo mama's so fat that when she was in school she sat next to everybody.
#71
Yo mama’s so big, when she talks to herself it’s a long-distance call.
Aiden Hudgeons 10 months ago
Ur mom is so fat that the sun has nothing on her after thanksgiving
#72
Yo mama’s so fat, if she got her shoes shined, she’d have to take his word for it.
#73
Yo mama’s so fat, she doesn't have a circumference. She has an event horizon.
#74
Yo mama's so fat, the sorting hat put her in the house of pancakes.
#76
Yo mama's so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
#77
Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
#78
Yo mama’s so fat, she wakes up on both sides of the bed.
#81
Yo mama's so lazy, she stuck her nose out the window and let the wind blow it.
#82
Yo mama's so lazy, she has a stay-at-home job and still is late to work.
#83
Yo mama's so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.
#89
Yo mama's so sweet she takes her coffee without sugar.
#90
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.
#92
Yo mama's so nice... she works 3 jobs and still makes time for you.
#94
Yo mama's so fat, every time she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
W***t J***s 1 year ago
I have an idea for a yo mama joke: Yo mama's so fat that she collapsed into a supermassive black hole
#101
Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
#102
Yo mama's so dumb, she went to the library to find Facebook.
#106
Yo mama’s so fat that the probability of her being in any arbitrary point in space is 1.
#108
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter.
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