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Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Losing them. My 15 year old son died suddenly on Tuesday morning. His dad went to wake him for school and he wasn't breathing. He had no health conditions and we don't know the cause of death yet. My baby is just gone.

Every single part of parenting is a challenge. But losing a child is a pain unlike anything I've ever known. Having a child is taking a risk that someday your whole world could be shattered, and there's absolutely nothing you can do to stop it.

ETA: Thank you so much to everyone who has commented. This has been such a devastating time for me, and it really does help to know that people out there care enough to comfort and grieve with a stranger. Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart.

genericusername098 , Veit Hammer Report

Final score:

367points

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Dizzie D 1 year ago

This post kind of negates all the other posts on here complaining about being tired or loss of freedom or 'can't do what you want'. I'm getting that this Mother would trade places with these people anytime and rather feel utterly exhausted her whole life than lose her son. I can't imagine what she's going through. Stop stressing about the small things and appreciate what you have. Some people also can never have children and want them desperately. I don't think there is one thing I regret about having my son, not one thing.

249points

New parent here (baby is less than 6 months old).

The worst part so far is all the unsolicited advice. Apparently everything you know is wrong, and the only reliable source is "trust me, I raised kids 30 / 60 years ago, this is how it should be done".

Well, Sharon, I saw your work, and I am not a fan.

JackSixxx Report

Final score:

326points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago (edited)

It will not end. If anything it gets worse. You just develop a backbone later.

63points

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Worrying about them for the rest of your life.

BigThistyBeast replied:

My dad died at 64 in 2017. Grandma is still around and she’s 96 now. Every time I see her she starts crying and tells me stories about him as a child. Breaks my heart that she still is in pain from it. Outliving your children must be horrible no matter how old you are

jbobeffrey , Edi Libedinsky Report

Final score:

273points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

This is why our parents dote and fuss over us, even as adults.

72points

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses The days drag on, but the years fly by.

FindingPace , Scott Webb Report

Final score:

257points

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OnAFreakingRollercoaster 1 year ago

Yes

50points

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Worrying about how the outside world will treat them.

MrAbadeer , Jacek Dylag Report

Final score:

208points

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Headless Roach 1 year ago

Not only 'will', but how it already does too.

59points

When you have a child who has severe difficulties (whether physical or mental). In our case, my daughter has a severe mental illness. Everyone gets pregnant and thinks everything is going to be wonderful and the kid is automatically going to grow up and get good grades and have friends and do normal kid things. That’s what you think and that’s what everyone tells you. It’s a cruel thing to realize that in reality, generics is a lottery and some of us WILL lose. Some kids will NOT have the life you envisioned.

acain0412 Report

Final score:

195points

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Natalia Shoemark 1 year ago

And sometimes those perfect Facebook photos and posts hurt! I guess the only thing you can do is be proud of your family and the culture you've created amongst yourselves :) there's all kinds of winning that doesn't include goals!

15points

When you give them life advice and they listen to their stupid 17 year old friends instead. Most frustrating thing ever.

Also, I'd like to apologize to my parents for when I was 17 and stupid.

Bevester Report

Final score:

193points

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Rebekah 1 year ago

I have a 17yo. I swear I was just 17 yesterday. I share with him the things I didn't hear at 17. I feel it gives me footing that I didn't have at that age.

45points

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses If they are born with severe disabilities, you will need to take care of them or make plans for their care for as long as they are alive. It’s heartbreaking, many marriages don’t make it. My utmost respect to parents of special needs children.

jthekoker , Gautam Arora Report

Final score:

173points

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Neuridivergent 1 year ago

And those that want to outlaw abortion are not stepping up to adopt these kids from parents who never be financially able to take care of these kids.

130points

Nitka Tsar 1 year ago

Financially or mentally!

19points

Paige Fantastic 1 year ago

Of the special needs children in foster care only a small percentage are actually available for adoption. In most cases they remain wards of the state for various reasons. 80% of foster care children in the US exit foster care into families. Either relatives or through adoption. Of those who remain in care only about 30% are adoptable. The average wait for adoption is 3 years. There are more applications for adoption than approved adoptive homes, especially for special needs children. Meaning more people are willing than who are approved as able. The congressional coalition for adoption is a great source if you're wondering.

5points

Leo Domitrix 1 year ago

I give credit to a longtime close friend who was rabidly pro-life... Then her son with Down's turned 10 and she doesn't regret her choice but is determined others should have it, legally and safely, because.... Well, because.

3points

Megan Duffy 1 year ago

Do you have stats or facts to back this claim up. I grew up in a family that took in foster kids. There were adoptive families waiting to take every kid that became available. A girl with down syndrome, toddlers born addicted to meth or crack that we're going to have issues their whole life, twins that had emotional issues all were placed out of my families home into adoption. Families waited years to get a child.

2points

Everest the bookworm 1 year ago

to Justin, i guess the 12-year-olds who were R@ped should give birth to the child that was forced on them please, kindly, shut the f**k up.

1point

Anna Elliarad 1 year ago

Not that poor parents want to automatically give them away just because they can’t afford the best life for them!

1point

Kimberly Ledig 1 year ago

That is an extremely intelligent statement. The pro life faction are actually pro fetus. As soon as the fetus becomes a child,they do not care anymore

0points

Cary 1 year ago

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Justin Rogers 1 year ago

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

When it comes to rocky marriages with a severely disabled child I feel for the child the most. But I also feel for the parents, too. Parents are not experts on caring for someone disabled, nor about the disability. They're learning along the way. Although there are supports and programs for the disabled child, there is very little, to no support for the parents to be able to talk about what they're feeling, how they're getting along. I know there's a few support groups, but they're often niched and localized.

17points

Diego,Laura 1 year ago

Case in point : Chris and Anna. Poor Jack. Wasn't good enough for his daddy.

-3points

Kat Min 1 year ago

A colleague of mine has a disabled brother. His dad took care of him all his life and is now, at almost 80, moving into an old people's home with his son. When he is dead, the (mentally) disabled son can stay there and be taken care of. A good arrangement but, man, staying the parents of a child that needs your help till you are 80+ is not the lfie we envision.

7points

MarWol 1 year ago

Yup, happened to us. Perfect pregnancy, uncomplicated birth, rocky couple of months and a diagnosis that means care for life. But I can honestly say that we are happy and even though it's a tough thing to go through as a couple, I do see the possibility that we'll make it through. And our son is as happy as can be, which is the most important part.

5points

Androgyny Lunacy 1 year ago

Thanks! This is also close to my #1 because my daughter is level 3 autistic and she'll very likely need me until I die. Which terrifies me as to where she will be going then.

1point

Mrs. Harry Potter 1 year ago

I know a family with 5 boys, all with some degree of special needs. I always admire the parents at how patient they are and how well they have raised their children.

0points

#10

That even though one may raise them as good as possible, that child may still turn out to be an evil human being.

MTVChallengeFan Report

Final score:

139points

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Too lazy 1 year ago

This is heartbreaking

51points

#11

My daughter is almost 18. For me the worst part was losing my little buddy who always wanted daddy. She would hug and kiss all the time, say I love you and I was always her safe space.

She turned 13 or 14 and that was the end. She became a teen and didn’t need mom and dad or affection anymore. I didn’t know it happened like that.

I know she loves us, but they just stop showing it. It’s a big loss actually.

RPL79 Report

Final score:

128points

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Natalia Shoemark 1 year ago

She'll come back mate, you've done all the ground work xxx

130points

#12

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Having to deal with their total lack of self-preservation. They are creative and come up with all kinds of ways to try and kill themselves, keeping ahead of the game is exhausting.

Quizzical_Chimp , Jess Zoerb Report

Final score:

125points

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BatPhace 1 year ago

Let them play, let them get hurt, they learn to do better next time (obviously don't let them play with fireworks or jump in the shallow end of the pool but falling off of stuff and wrecking their bikes is par for the course)

41points

#13

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Having to take care of a sick child when you are also sick. For me that has been the most challenging part so far.

MrsLouisaMercury , Kelly Sikkema Report

Final score:

120points

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Settled for Infamy 1 year ago (edited)

It's also guaranteed that your child gets better before you and has energy to burn when you are facing the worst of it

72points

#14

For me I just really like to be alone sometimes. Before kids I would just go downstairs and watch a tv show, play PlayStation, or play guitar and my wife would do her own thing as well. Now, I have maybe 1 hour of alone time (sometimes none) every couple of days. It’s at 11 at night and I’m tired as f**k then and the next day.

It’s the hardest part for me. Love them to death, but it’s hard to be “on” all the time with work and them when at home.

Royalking23 Report

Final score:

119points

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Deborah B 1 year ago

I don't get this. Parents need breaks, and not just together, they need alone time. As we got older my parents would set themselves "quiet time/writing time" when they were not to be interupted except for serious injury or emergency. "If there's a lot of blood, and you can't make it stop bleeding, you can interrupt me." "If it's just smoke, or a small fire, put it out, and tell me later"

63points

#15

Playing the lottery of having a healthy child. Our daughter was diagnosed with schizophrenia during her teens. It's a rollercoaster of emotions. We have our good days and bad. Having to explain the diagnosis to people who feel uncomfortable being around our daughter because of the stigma displayed in the news and movies. The worst, for me, is watching her friends and our family's children have a more "normal" life. It's like reopening a wound everytime someone gets married, graduates, or some other milestone in life.

TDK716 Report

Final score:

112points

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Rasha K 1 year ago

Schizophrenia is heartbreaking. You've got this kid who is thriving and all of a sudden these symptoms show up that appear to be teenage rebellion, but turn out to be one of the most devastating illnesses in existence. My heart goes out to you.

34points

#16

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses I'm so tired. Just tired all the time. I don't ever remember not feeling tired.

sailphish , Annie Spratt Report

Final score:

110points

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Orange Frosting 1 year ago

Me too, friend.

35points

#17

Having depression and having depressed children f*****g sucks. If you have mental illness, and you’re kids get the same mental illness it will double your mental illness.

mikalalnr Report

Final score:

105points

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Mickysixxx 1 year ago

If you suffer mental illness such as depression and have kids you really need to do everything you can to minimise the symptoms (easier said than done I know, trust me) go see a therapist, take your medication and find a purpose. It's really hard to deal with but depression is contagious, anybody that has lived with depression can attest to that. Please seek help if you are feeling this way

41points

#18

You have to feed them like every day.

AardvarkAndy Report

Final score:

101points

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OnAFreakingRollercoaster 1 year ago

And also several times a day

59points

Infiniski_Gaming , Avatar of user Sean Do Sean Do everywheresean Sean Do Report

#19

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses When people ask me this I say.
You know those video games where you have to escort a character to a destination without them being attacked.
That's parenting.
Those missions are a pain in the a*s.

Final score:

96points

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Max M 1 year ago

And the character keep standing up while you sneak, run head on into fights you know is hopeless

43points

Casual_Frontpager , Guillaume de Germain Report

#20

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses The worry that I’m a bad parent that’s doing things wrong.

Final score:

93points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

There's no right or wrong way to parent as long as you're caring, loving, providing, nourishing, teaching, guiding and allowing them some freedoms.

27points

itdoesnotmatter1684 Report

#21

I’m divorced and the worst part of having kids is being tied to my ex forever.

Final score:

92points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

In the blood in your child, yes, but you don't have to be in contact with your ex forever.

8points

#22

It never gets easier, only different. Newborns not sleeping through the night gets replaced by teens staying out past curfew and you going down the deep rabbit hole of worry wondering if they were in a car accident, abducted or something else.

BlendedChaos2012 Report

Final score:

91points

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Sherri Martel 1 year ago

This needs more upvotes!!! My friends who are new parents always say "but it gets easier, right?" Yeah, nope. Physically it gets easier, but then emotionally it's constantly more and more complicated - your emotions and theirs.

34points

#23

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Watching them make the same mistakes you did even though you told them not to make those mistakes.

Little Jimmy.. if you borrow a bunch of money, those people are going to want it back and if they don't get it back they'll take stuff you won't want taken.

Anom8675309 , Charlein Gracia Report

Final score:

89points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

In the end, we're all just humans trying to figure out how to get through life the easiest.

32points

nakedreturnsthe1st , Jonathan Borba Report

#24

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses The constant anxiety that you’re doing enough to shape them to make good choices,a good life,be a good person and for them to have the life they deserve.

Final score:

87points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago (edited)

Trusting their ability at independence is really a trust test on how parents think they did to enable their independence. We seem to not give ourselves much credit.

26points

#25

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses The loss of freedom. I can't just... go somewhere. Even with older kids, there's so much planning and thinking and getting ready.

I miss being able to just decide to go somewhere, and go there.

poetris , Annie Spratt Report

Final score:

84points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

I found planning the hardest to do because things often don't go to plan, and then what? For big, longer trips that required some prepping that's when planning happened. Other than that, if I decided to go to the zoo or swimming that day my kid would be excited to go and that's what we did. When she got older and I had more time to myself it hit me and I got this odd feeling that I could go out somewhere on my own, anywhere. I didn't have to just stay at home or bring along a kid. Felt pretty weird. I'll admit I was lost.

23points

#26

Watching them grow. It’s the most rewarding heartbreak ever.

yeehawstitching Report

Final score:

82points

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Headless Roach 1 year ago (edited)

For me the most amazing part was developing contact - from the first curious glances at you, through babble, first words and sentences, up to full sarcasm mode 🙃 And every time I felt "I understand you, buddy"

29points

tessiegamgee , Priscilla Du Preez Report

#27

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses I'm only 9 years in, but so far it's been the sleep deprivation. Hands down.

ETA: I'm not still sleep deprived. My kids sleep great now at nearly 9 & 5. But that was the hardest part of parenthood for me so far.

Final score:

71points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

The sleep deprivation is very hard but I wouldn't say the hardest. It's not forever. Just seems that way. And then your kid is going off to kindergarten in the blink of an eye.

17points

#28

Yeah co-sign on "constant worry." Having a kid is like having a little piece of your heart running around in the world. When they're sick or get disappointed or just feel sad, it's worse than having it happen to you. Yet at the same time, you need to let your kids work through those things to learn to handle them. If you give into the worry and try to shield them from everything, you risk creating harmful co dependence. So it's a constant struggle. But worth it!

um_chili Report

Final score:

70points

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Cheeky chicken 1 year ago

You're only ever as happy as your saddest child....something I read on BP a while ago so I'm sharing it again. It struck home with me

32points

#29

Watching them stray down the wrong path. Wishing they’d listen to you.

Bigred4x4 Report

Final score:

61points

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Amy E 1 year ago

Some learn best from their own mistakes.

17points

#30

The cleanup.

From the moment the water breaks it's cleanup. Not just the entire birthing process on the "Big Day" either. Diapers spit up and tired messy mom give way to toilet training. Cleanup of every bodily fluid. Laundry, toys, and food crumbs find every nook and cranny of space. Then you have to navigate all of the emotional cleanup from sharing toys, to bad teachers, to bullies, to bad breakups.

It's almost always cleanup, but it isn't always bad.

MetalLinebacker Report

Final score:

60points

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Lynne Hammar 1 year ago

While they are out, you tidy the whole house. Within 5 minutes of their return, the entire house, it looks like a bomb went off

29points

#31

They’re just always there. On you, behind you, in front of you, just a little speed bump impeding every task. Lol

Tangboy50000 Report

Final score:

59points

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Linus G. 1 year ago

That Lol seems strained...

25points

#32

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses How much you sacrifice. Kids take everything you’ve got and then ask for more. They are endless, remorseless need machines. (Or at least they feel that way, for a looong time.)

But that’s just the deal. And if you’re up for it, it’s a perfectly acceptable deal. But even when you are all in and completely okay about the sacrifice, sometimes it really feels like a lot.

jimmyjazz2000 , Bethany Beck Report

Final score:

59points

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Headless Roach 1 year ago

Parenthood is not all about sacrifice. A propert balance is something you learn on the way... or not, though.

17points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

See Also on Bored Panda

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#33

Besides all the other things mentioned, having your internal organs rearranged. Some of them permanently.

nicehrlady Report

Final score:

58points

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Tenacious Squirrel 1 year ago

Adoptive parents avoid this :-)

17points

#34

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses Your life's no longer yours. By time you get home from work, sort tea, sort kitchen, get then in bed you've about an hr before you gotta go to bed to start it all over again

Edit: when I say tea I mean dinner/supper, not a cup of tea

glenman1882 , Abbie Bernet Report

Final score:

57points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

LOL I got this is coming from a Brit. I get the confusion because when I first heard my Brit bf say he was going to eat his tea I was dumbfounded. "Like, you have tea you can eat?" XD Good times. The amount of responsibilities to keep a house, provide, nourish and nurture is astonishing. It's not all bad but it does take a toll on you.

18points

#35

At least in America, it seems like society doesn't give a s**t about supporting families, financially.

Daycare is expensive as hell. Oh, school finally helped take care of your kids? Well, what about after school care? What about summer? Summer camps and after school care costs are nuts too. All of this adds up to the constant anxiety of failing your child, financially.

Shargur Report

Final score:

57points

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Sara Anderson 1 year ago

...or the feeling that you must stay in your toxic job because it's a decent paycheck and there's no guarantee another job is out there for you, so you just take the abuse to make the money to make the life you want for your kid, which of course leads to burnout and depression, but whatever. That's just adulthood, right?

29points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#36

How your partner changes. My partner (M) and I (F) we’re thinking about having a child. He wants 2 I would love 3. We have one (2 years old). I cannot express how much he changed after the child…. He is a completely different person and not in a good way. He is always short tempered, which I had no idea before the baby arrived. (we are together for 10 years).
edit: this is what makes me think I am done at one… I cannot imagine what life would be with more kids, as he is angry all the time

irishboymum Report

Final score:

56points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago (edited)

There are SOME men who suppress who they really are until they got you locked in and/or in a situation where they can't hide their anger and other issues anymore. They don't just "change", they stop pretending. *Women can be the same way. Yeesh.

46points

#37

Every time I'm no longer needed for something, it takes some time for me to adjust. I had no problem with never needing to change another diaper when he was a toddler, but it feels like every day of his teen years results in one more thing he can do independently. He's taller than me now and can reach into the cabinets just fine without my help. We've also stopped going for walks together, now that he has a cell phone.

I've been stay at home parent his entire life, and now I'm thinking about getting a job, but people don't want to hire me anywhere. That's been really difficult, too.

lydsbane Report

Final score:

54points

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Sally Close 1 year ago

Don't give up. Keep applying for jobs. Someone will see your worth and value.

29points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

See Also on Bored Panda

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#38

My top thing I tell expecting parents is you no longer sleep when you see fit. Tired? Too bad, you’ve got responsibilities and a human/humans to keep alive.

This worsens because not only do you wake up when they do and go to sleep after them, but you’re also inclined to stay up later for doing whatever grownup stuff you enjoy. I’m so guilty of staying up way too late to watch shows that aren’t exactly kid friendly, my wife is all into the true crime stuff, so we get the kids to bed then stay up until 1-2 some nights watching stuff. Guess who doesn’t give a s**t? The kids. They’re up at 7-8 ready to rock and I’m yet to find their snooze buttons. I’m fortunate to function well on anything over 6 hours of sleep, her not so much. She’s currently passed out on the couch as I type this, for the exact reasons listed above lol.

Comisayllama Report

Final score:

53points

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Dontyouwishyouknew 1 year ago

I'm definitely guilty of this. It's in these hours when everyone else is asleep that I finally feel I can relax without anyone needing anything from me.

24points

#39

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses It's like taking a 2nd job that lasts 18+ years with 24/7 schedule with no holidays or sick days.

mouse_rat , Zhivko Minkov Report

Final score:

52points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

I've never felt of it as a job. You can have sick days if you know someone to watch them for you while you get better. I learned from a few bad illnesses that a very sick parent is not capable of properly providing care. It's okay to reach out for help. In fact, it should be encouraged.

16points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

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Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#40

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses For me it's giving up a part of myself that I will never get back, don't get me wrong, I would choose to do it every time, but there is a mourn of a previous self and the sacrifice I need to do to become the best father I can be and that can be hard sometimes.

GroundbreakingTip438 , Szilvia Basso Report

Final score:

50points

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StrangeOne 1 year ago

I think that's just part of maturing and growing. When you become a parent it does speed up maturity but I've met parents who aren't really that mature, really. And there are some who are just so serious and strict I have to wonder if they recall ever being a kid.

11points

#41

Repeating myself 6,438 times a day. F**k.

ramrod254 Report

Final score:

48points

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LuLuBelle 1 year ago

I supervise college students and I totally feel this. How many ways are there to say "get off your phone"?

14points

#42

Right now it's the relentless illnesses! One kid brings something home, sick and off nursery for 4 days, recovers but two days later Mum gets, one day after Baby gets and one day later Dad gets. Its brutal, especially since kid 1 has recovered and doesn't understand why no one will play. Well maybe because we are all puking our guts up you wee gremlin!

MischievousKilt Report

Final score:

47points

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Jason 1 year ago

Going through this as we speak. Of course fingers constantly in nose and everything in mouth

11points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#43

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses The strain on your marriage/relationship. We thought we were completely prepared since our child was planned. Then you add the responsibility and stress and the take away sleep. (Didn’t sleep through the night for 9 straight months) We were at each others throats every single day. We finally got ourselves figured out and are good now

catchmeifyoucannon , Priscilla Du Preez Report

Final score:

44points

POST

StrangeOne 1 year ago (edited)

It's people romanticizing fantasies of what having a kid will be like. They get this picture of being a happy couple looking down at their sleeping baby in a pretty cradle, while mother hums a lullaby and dad hugs his wife, gives her kiss and offers to take over some of the night feedings. Reality: Mom and Dad are a sleep deprived wreck. Mom (or whoever cares for the baby) hasn't showered in a week, feels and looks like a deflated parade balloon. Dad is starting to get insatiably horny, pressuring his weary wife to satisfy his needs while she's having none of it. Her husband also starts to get jealous of all the attention the baby is getting and resentful of her and their baby. She needs to nurse and he wants to use that time opportunistically to turn feeding time into a breastfeeding kink. (Gross but it exists.) Wife is getting fed up with her husband turned man-child, horny-freak. Husband can't handle it and then emotions erupt.

31points

#44

I have an infant. Right now, it’s:

Friends who don’t have kids and get upset because they can’t understand how your life has drastically changed.

News articles about pandemics and mass shootings, and knowing that you are raising a child in a world that generally doesn’t care about their well being.

Knowing that your child will eventually be hurt by others, and that you will be powerless to stop it… so instead you have to instill resilience in them. And you hope you do a good job because of how many bullies and a******s there are in this world.

Coping with the fact that one day they’re going to stop sleeping in your arms during naps, and laughing at your silly faces, and stop looking at you with absolute unsullied admiration.

The helplessness during their first bruise, their first illness, their first babysit session when you check your phone every five minutes because every single news story about terrible things that happen pops into your mind.

There’s a lot of “worst parts.”

Luckily, it’s still all worth it.

ThePsychSide Report

Final score:

43points

POST

Neuridivergent 1 year ago

Put your kid's schedule on your Google calendar and then share with your friend and ask "when do i have time for a four hour girls spa day once a month? And are you going to pay for it ?"

6points

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

See Also on Bored Panda

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#45

Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses It's incessant. It never stops. You never get a day off.

Going from having two days per week to relax and do whatever to literally never having a moment free from responsibility.

mrbuh , christopher lemercier Report

Final score:

39points

POST

StrangeOne 1 year ago

I felt this way during the elementary school days. If you think being a parent means not having responsibilities with schools like you did when you were in school, HA! Being called to have a meeting with the principal or the teacher feels like you're the one in trouble. If your kid didn't do their homework a part of the blame feels like it's on you. They have to be brought to school and picked up. You go around their schedule and your job's. I mostly felt like I couldn't have my own schedule at any point of the week.

8points

#46

#1 Watching them be in pain (physical or emotional)

#2 Cleaning up vomit

emory_2001 Report

Final score:

37points

POST

Paula Chaffee 1 year ago

This resonates most with me. Most memorable Mother's Day? The one I cleaned up kid, dog, and cat vom!

10points

#47

Transitions. From baby to toddler, to little kid, to big kid…. Time passes by and with it they start growing into independent persons. A parent’s love grows with them, but te feeling of knowing sooner than later they will belong to the world…… And we adults posses the understanding that the world IS. This can be both beautiful and scary.

oriana5555 Report

Final score:

35points

POST

JoMeBee 1 year ago

Yup. Having a minor meltdown. Gotta sign my kid up for high school classes soon. Can't believe how quickly the time has passed. He'll be out of school before I can retire, so I'll finally have more time and my kids will be all grown up and not need me as much...

3points

#48

Boredom.

Apart from the real life problems, like providing for them, health and constantly being worried. They are so damn boring. How long can you play with a toddler and not lose your mind? Entertaining small kids is so annoying.

Once they learn to read it gets so much better.

Why_So_Slow Report

Final score:

33points

POST

Lynne Hammar 1 year ago

You can read to tiny babies!

19points

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

See Also on Bored Panda

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#49

Literally ZERO breaks! You are on call 24/7 for 18+ years. Never can slow down to even catch your breath. It is equal parts exhausting and rewarding. I always say I wish we had better respite for parents because we all need it!!

KindredSpirit24 Report

Final score:

31points

POST

TheReader19 1 year ago

I don't agree, when kids get to specific ages they are quiet sel sufficient. Teaching them basic skills means that they can make little snacks and get on with things. Allow kids to grow and be independent benefits everyone

8points

#50

At the beginning, planning things becomes much more complicated. Want to fly? Gotta plan for stroller and car seat. Which car rental place is in the terminal so you don’t have to haul all your kids stuff on a bus.

And things can get messed up just because your kid is having a bad day. You might be out at a restaurant and your kid gets mad because [insert dumb thing here] so you just need to pay your bill and leave, or eat in shifts with so someone can be outside with a mad toddler.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my kid and wouldn’t change anything but details that never mattered to me before become things you have to take into consideration.

BaltimoreProud Report

Final score:

27points

POST

StrangeOne 1 year ago

If you think about it, I believe toddlers get angry because they have all this pent up energy and they're always being restrained in something like a car seat, stroller, high chair.

16points

feeling_waterlogged Report

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#51

You can't do ANYTHING without factoring your child into it. Your entire life revolves around making sure they are okay and taken care of. Your decision to do something is never really your own ever again. Can't work a night job unless you're sure you can find childcare or have a spouse to take that shift. Can't go to the beach alone without finding a sitter. Can't go to the beach with the kids without packing 80 gallons of water, a billion snacks, extra clothes, special baby sunscreens, and the list goes on. It's honestly exhausting for someone like me who loves to be alone and do things alone. I love my kid to death but god damn some solitude where I don't have to think about how what I'm doing affects her or worry about where she is and what she's doing would be nice here and there. I'm going on year 12 of motherhood. And I know it's not slowing down anytime soon.

HamboneJone Report

Final score:

9points

POST

foryouwhynot IB 1 year ago

About 4-years and you’ll switch from being side-by-side to sitting at home while she’s out doing whatever so…

0points

#52

No more peace and quiet.

SuvenPan Report

Final score:

9points

POST

#53

Losing all ability to control your own time.

They don’t eat meals and then get hungry an hour later. They have school and lessons to be taken too. They have homework. They need snacks when just start doing the thing you need to do. The need baths. They make messes and leave things everywhere.

After all this their isn’t anytime left.

justinkthornton Report

Final score:

8points

POST

Geoffrey Scott 1 year ago

Then when you DO have the time when they are growed and gone, it's "now what"?

1point

#54

teenage years, worked for a customer once who put a sign on their frig saying "leave home now while you still know everything"

Final score:

8points

POST

Geoffrey Scott 1 year ago

Was it Twain who said "when I left home at 16 my Dad was the most ignorant man alive, when I returned a year later I was amazed at what he learned in one year"

3points

Bighairyaussiebear Report

#55

Definitely money I reckon.

I don't have children but my SIL does. I spent $50 on arcade machines for the little terrors one day.

I can't imagine all the cost of diapers, activities, asking to go to the movies, school stuff, birthdays, Christmas, clothes.

Back in the day you'd buy a squeaky toy and they'd be happy. It's now an iPad or iPhone.

Final score:

7points

POST

StrangeOne 1 year ago

You budget and learn to say no. You say "No!" a lot more than yes because those treats can't happen every day, nor every week. Kids don't need to be expensive to entertain. I used to spend about an hour playing on a plank of wood discarded on the boulevard in front of our house. Give a kid a box and they'll have a grand ol' time with their imagination.

8points

3CatsInATrenchcoat16 Report

#56

Other than the constant invasive thoughts, for me, STOP F*****G TOUCHING ME!

Final score:

6points

POST

Sherri Martel 1 year ago

Constant physical overwhelm. I don't even want my cat near me a lot of the time now. I just need to be not touched for awhile sometimes, which is tough when you have cuddly (but fidgety) kids and emotionally needy cats!

2points

#57

I'm only a few years along, but lack of free time is the biggest one. Also, our sex life has suffered due to (a) no time and (b) lots of otherwise good opportunities being impossible. We have to schedule.

wsc-porn-acct Report

Final score:

6points

POST

foryouwhynot IB 1 year ago

It could be worse…at least it still exists!

0points

#58

Being hungover on a Sunday morning catering to a 3 and 1 year old.

icanaffordguacamole Report

Final score:

5points

POST

Jason 1 year ago

Way too busy with kids and life to spend it hungover. Maybe I'm just old

4points

#59

Labor.

Historical_Debt1516 Report

Final score:

0points

POST

Edda Kamphues 1 year ago

I take that any day over arguing with a teenager.

2points

I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. Looking at pets and memes is the best part of my work. I love to travel and want to see the world. Still looking and exploring stuff I like and want to do so thats exciting... and sometimes not

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Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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What do you think ?

POST

Cathy Jo Baker 1 year ago

Yet I get dragged because I never had kids. Best decision I've ever made. I knew I wasn't mother material and made sure I'd never be one.

26points

BluEyedSeoulite 1 year ago

I hate that people get so judgy because someone decided not to have kids. It's 100% valid! Sometimes, I think they are just jealous of childless people. Life is a LOT less complicated and cheaper without kids. I also think it is a super responsible decision to not have kids unless you want them

16points

Susan Green 1 year ago

No one should feel bad because they don’t want kids. My oldest, who is 36, doesn’t want kids and I have no problem with that.

4points

Sommer Willis 1 year ago

That's a mature outlook. I have kids myself but I admire the resolve of adults who are self aware enough to choose not to have kids if they don't want kids. Knowing you don't want kids and then taking steps not to have them is responsible regardless of how it makes other adults feel. A lot of people can't be empathetic and they don't get how anyone could feel differently than they do, so they see not having children from their own perspective and it's something they can't understand choosing.

2points

TVLA 1 year ago

I love being the fun auntie to my siblings and friends children. I get to spend time with the kiddos, give the parents a break, and then return said kiddos to parents and go back to my life of adventures and intrigue.

0points

Steve 1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Frank S 1 year ago

59 more reasons not to have kids

20points

Sherri Martel 1 year ago

The thing that 99% of these parents share is that we'd all still do it over again, even knowing these things. Having kids is hard and it sucks. It's also awesome and amazing. Bad and good can coexist.

16points

Sponge Blob 1 year ago

God, these "recommendations" appearing on top of every page on Bored Panda really get on my nerves. Never have I followed them, just another tiny X to click, because it's obstructing article I actually want to read.

15points

Suzy Creamcheese 1 year ago

I never had kids and never regretted that decision. My friends who do have kids are roughly evenly divided between "your life doesn't begin until you have kids" and "your life is over once you have kids." I'm pretty sure I'd have been in group 2.

10points

Cee 1 year ago

Bored panda how many of these “having children is the worst “posts are you going to do?? I’d like to see a post about the heartbreak of women that waited too long to have children and can no longer have them.

4points

The crushinator 1 year ago

I get that guilt trippy, judgemental attitude from people almost 24/7 in real life so no thanks. I'll keep reading these lists and feeling empowered and heard if you don't mind.

1point

Kar D 1 year ago

Only thing that ever disappointed me is myself. I'm not as calm and patient as I would like to be. I hate it when I get angry at the kids

4points

Aythya 1 year ago

I don't understand three things... 1. Why have kids if you can't stand that they will be adults one day? That they won't admire you all the time? That one day they will be independent and will leave you to live their own lives, just like you did with your parents? Don't have kids if you're scared of loosing control over them and stopping to be an unquestionable authority. 2. Why have kids if you see the world as super bad and scary? Yes, your children will experience all the bad things you experienced. Someone will hurt them, they will face injustice, treachery, death, sometimes poverty and serious ilnesses. If you can't stand that your kids will suffer eventually - don't bring them to this world. 3. Why have kids if you're mentally ill and unstable? Kids would make it worse. And they will be ill as well. Help yourself, stabilize your mental health and work through your trauma before you decide that you're getting kids.

3points

Adalmina 1 year ago

Who needs birth control when you have this post :)

2points

Bella Langston 1 year ago

I'm tired of these articles. Yes, we all get it—being a parent is hard, choosing not to be a parent is valid, etc. Please get some new material.

2points

Steven 1 year ago

Agree! Balance is needed. Such as, what is the one best thing and what is the one wordt thing about having kids? Or, the same balanced question about not having kids?!

0points

Monica Hosky 1 year ago

How are NONE of these about school/homework? I HATED grades 7-10. Now I’m having to do it AGAIN, with a kid who has the same struggles with ADHD/anxiety that I did, only NOTHING helped me so I know of NOTHING that might help him, other than at least I know what he can’t even articulate not knowing how to do, like how to take notes, like writing down assignments every day and IN DETAIL, like you CANNOT DO THESE KINDS OF MATH PROBLEMS IN YOUR HEAD. I know what tools he’s missing, but I don’t know how to give him those tools with anything other than the same overwhelming anger and frustration and DO NOT WANT that I felt about myself when I was that age.

2points

similarly 1 year ago

The absolute hardest part about being a parent was not knowing that the way I was raised was not actually the best way ... or even a good way ... to raise kids. I can look back and say "Well, I grew up in the 70s, and we ALL had home lives like that, so I just thought that's how you raise kids" but it's just not an excuse for all the mistakes I made as a parent before I figured it out.

1point

Spooky Scary Skeletons 1 year ago

gvyjluo-63...be8a9a.jpg

1point

Spooky Scary Skeletons 1 year ago

I1fPeq5h-6...6f3035.jpg

1point

Suzy Creamcheese 1 year ago (edited)

So why are the childless people depicted as loonies who go out in public without pants and follow random birds for no discernable reason? ;-)

1point

Amy E 1 year ago

List was repetitive.

1point

Runs with scissors 1 year ago

I agree with so much that's already been said, but I have to add; having to constantly play referee to three kids who are all intent on having the first turn, the biggest cookie, the best toy, etc,. I didn't expect that half of my day would be taken up by teaching them over and over and over and over that we don't push each other, we don't throw things when we are angry, we SHARE and take turns (I set a timer for 5 minutes about 100x a day LOL) and we communicate with our words, not by stealing toys or yelling and having tantrums. It's a process. Right now they are 6,3,and 21 months

0points

J Adams 1 year ago

The worst part is definitely that one day you are making hand print paintings at the kitchen table, pushing them on swings, teaching them to ride a bike, reading bedtime stories and all that kind of stuff and then seemingly the next they don’t ‘need’ you anymore. Appreciate every moment with your children because their childhood goes very quickly and those moments won’t ever come again, you never get a chance to hit rewind and do it again

0points

Richard Whitehead 1 year ago

One that I read years ago and stuck with me, is that you have 1 child, you don't have 1 child you have about 50. As they go through phases of development they change permanently into these new individuals. And you love each and everyone one of them, but a part of you misses not being able to see those previous versions ever again.

0points

Kevin Moore 1 year ago

I had this crazy notion before kids that you can use consequences to mold their behavior. Not so much, punishment just makes them angry and they do the behavior more as revenge. My daughter would jump out her window and wander around the neighborhood when we sent her to her room. And then you get to hear judgey people talking about how parents can’t control kids anymore. Please, take the reigns, show me how you would “make them behave.”

0points

Lara M 1 year ago

You don't need punishment. Just like with animals, you need positive reinforcement. And unlike with animals, you need explanations to help them understand why they need to do or not do whatever it is. My daughter is 7 and I've found that this works pretty well.

0points

Lil Potato 1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 1 year ago

The other day there was a page on memes (or something) about being child free and there was one commenter trying to convince us on all posts that being a parent was the best and all, acting as if he was God just for being a parent. Where was he this time? He could have chimed in!

-1point

J. Maxx 1 year ago

A lot of these posters should not of had kids and I feel sorry for their children.

-1point

F C 1 year ago

Frankly many parents who are afraid of the outside world, but then don't help you when you report an incident about it, don't really deserve to "worry." And all this "never ending stuff," in my experience parents gave me awful advice, so I stopped asking, but usually it wasn't advice only an interrogation as if every conversation and phone call they report back to you because you claim you want to know. Then they'll stop talking to you altogether.

-2points

Mickysixxx 1 year ago

Sounds like you had s****y parents. I believe this post was about parents that care about their kids not deadbeat ones

2points

Tasha Love 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Little Wonder 1 year ago

If I ask you how you are, are you going to tell me how YOU are or how your kids are? The question was to parents, about parenting.

8points

Lil Potato 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Little Wonder 1 year ago

Being realistic about parenting isn't "hating kids". It's being realistic. It's a hard, boring, tedious, endless job and that doesn't mean it's not worth it but people go into parenting with the Instagram idea it'll all be rainbows and teddybears, it's important to talk about the hard stuff too.

16points

Findlay O’Connor 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

BluEyedSeoulite 1 year ago

Wtf you talking about?

9points

POST

Cathy Jo Baker 1 year ago

Yet I get dragged because I never had kids. Best decision I've ever made. I knew I wasn't mother material and made sure I'd never be one.

26points

BluEyedSeoulite 1 year ago

16points

Susan Green 1 year ago

No one should feel bad because they don’t want kids. My oldest, who is 36, doesn’t want kids and I have no problem with that.

4points

Sommer Willis 1 year ago

2points

TVLA 1 year ago

0points

Steve 1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Frank S 1 year ago

59 more reasons not to have kids

20points

Sherri Martel 1 year ago

16points

Sponge Blob 1 year ago

15points

Suzy Creamcheese 1 year ago

10points

Cee 1 year ago

4points

The crushinator 1 year ago

I get that guilt trippy, judgemental attitude from people almost 24/7 in real life so no thanks. I'll keep reading these lists and feeling empowered and heard if you don't mind.

1point

Kar D 1 year ago

Only thing that ever disappointed me is myself. I'm not as calm and patient as I would like to be. I hate it when I get angry at the kids

4points

Aythya 1 year ago

3points

Adalmina 1 year ago

Who needs birth control when you have this post :)

2points

Bella Langston 1 year ago

I'm tired of these articles. Yes, we all get it—being a parent is hard, choosing not to be a parent is valid, etc. Please get some new material.

2points

Steven 1 year ago

Agree! Balance is needed. Such as, what is the one best thing and what is the one wordt thing about having kids? Or, the same balanced question about not having kids?!

0points

Monica Hosky 1 year ago

2points

similarly 1 year ago

1point

Spooky Scary Skeletons 1 year ago

gvyjluo-63...be8a9a.jpg

1point

Spooky Scary Skeletons 1 year ago

I1fPeq5h-6...6f3035.jpg

1point

Suzy Creamcheese 1 year ago (edited)

So why are the childless people depicted as loonies who go out in public without pants and follow random birds for no discernable reason? ;-)

1point

Amy E 1 year ago

List was repetitive.

1point

Runs with scissors 1 year ago

0points

J Adams 1 year ago

0points

Richard Whitehead 1 year ago

0points

Kevin Moore 1 year ago

0points

Lara M 1 year ago

0points

Lil Potato 1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 1 year ago

-1point

J. Maxx 1 year ago

A lot of these posters should not of had kids and I feel sorry for their children.

-1point

F C 1 year ago

-2points

Mickysixxx 1 year ago

Sounds like you had s****y parents. I believe this post was about parents that care about their kids not deadbeat ones

2points

Tasha Love 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Little Wonder 1 year ago

If I ask you how you are, are you going to tell me how YOU are or how your kids are? The question was to parents, about parenting.

8points

Lil Potato 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Little Wonder 1 year ago

16points

Findlay O’Connor 1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

BluEyedSeoulite 1 year ago

Wtf you talking about?

9points