Join the Fun!

It was a very short relationship, but early early on we were at his folks and standing around the kitchen. His dad was headed to the store he asked his dad what he was going to the store for and his dad was like “oh some things, milk, bread, I’ll probably pick up something for dinner” in the most average and normal tone of voice. I nod. The guy I was seeing explodes and goes “I was just asking!!!!”. My head spun around. I was so confused. How could anyone have interpreted his dad’s calm nonchalant grocery list as a personal attack.
In hindsight how unphased his dad seemed should have indicated this wasn’t a rare occurrence….

fulltimeheretic Report

Final score:

103points

POST

foreversilent92 1 month ago

Wow

32points

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Rage. Sudden outburst of rage.

Financial_Neck832: This was a red flag I ignored, too. 'He had a bad day,' or 'Wow, he hates this person & is so angry, this person must've wounded him deeply.' "

Nope, he was just an abusive narcissist. He liked getting angry, hurting others, and making people afraid. It was how he controlled people and situations so everything would go his way.

I'm glad I got the hell outta that marriage. Steer clear of ragers, it's not a phase.

Strike_Anywhere_1 , Usman Yousaf Report

Final score:

101points

POST

Monica G 1 month ago

TOXIC !

20points

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again When his football team lost so he went into the kitchen and smashed every glass on the floor.

Drynapples , Tembela Bohle Report

Final score:

96points

POST

ILoveMySon 1 month ago

A man child. Ugh.

73points

He told me his previous exes found each other and formed a support group 😅.

bee_vee Report

Final score:

92points

POST

Yellow dot 1 month ago (edited)

I was part of one of these types of groups, but I found myself trauma-bonding with his other exes. I'm better off just talking to a non partisan therapist.

34points

HappyHappyJoyJoy44 , Jep Gambardella Report

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Mine happened on the very first date. He said he was late because he was having trouble finding parking. He later told me he actually walked to the place from his nearby apartment. Sure, we all make innocuous white lies, but all he did was lie the entire relationship.

Final score:

78points

POST

Subaru645 1 month ago

Me too. Can’t stand a liar, cheater or thief.

37points

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again When I met his friends they all told me I could do so much better. If he was genuinely a good guy his buddies wouldn’t be trying to give me a heads up.

He turned into a serial cheater and gas lighter. It was always everyone else’s fault and not his and everyone just made up lies about him “just because.”.

WavyTexan , Toa Heftiba Şinca Report

Final score:

78points

POST

Guess Undheit 1 month ago

If they know he's scum, why do they hang around with him?

41points

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again His friends kicked me out of a road trip because he didn’t tell them I was coming. He didn’t stand up for me and left on the road trip anyways.

ckp010 , Tobi Report

Final score:

77points

POST

Pencil McGovern 1 month ago

So he was too cowardly to talk to them about having you come, too cowardly to tell you that he hadn't spoken to them about it. and too cowardly to do anything but roll when the inevitable confrontation happened. Damn.

34points

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Dismissive comments about my interests seemed minor until they became a pattern.

MrGrumplestiltskin: Yes, this one! I wore dresses a lot and like the color pink. I was always told that was "too girly" (even though I'm a girl, I was meant to think badly about liking this color). I started dating a high school best friend and he told me "I don't like cute things" while also telling me how cute he thought I was and how he liked bending down to kiss me. It was confusing. He didn't like girls who wore dresses or hyperfeminine (which I am both). He didn't like being romantic and made fun of me when I kept flowers he gifted me. Being dismissive or even ridiculing things is such a huge red flag.

ElegantMia , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

72points

POST

Lola July 1 month ago

Reminds me of my 2nd husband eventually disliking everything he initially found attractive about me. It was a him problem, not me. We separated, I had lots of friends who loved me, I told him "I like me, they like me. If you don't like me, quit calling me."

53points

Desperate_Divide6354 , Liza Summer Report

#10

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Everything I liked and enjoyed he would make fun of me and take the p**s. I was young (18/19) and had never had a relationship before. I was very much in love with him too. I felt like I was sad and pathetic. So I stopped doing what I loved and wouldn’t tell him anything.

I’m 29 now, and never been in another relationship as it seriously changed me. I’m getting back to myself. I know 10 years is a long time but, I’m accepting that now. I now do what I love. I read, I write, I paint, I water colour. I am happy and content again. I feel like I’ve got myself back. It took years for me to accept myself again because of this boy.

(I remember he made me go on a d***s run, because he said “no one will think you have anything and you’ll be fine, just go get it and come to my work” when I did that for him he said ‘thank god you’re a f*****g nerd’ … I was stupid and stayed with him. He used to cry after sex and say how good I was & I used to be so confused. He ended it by cheating on me and telling me ‘you look nothing like the girls I wanna f**k at work’

It changed me. I’m now a single 29 year old trying to get by life and regain myself and my happiness.

Final score:

72points

POST

Moo 1 month ago

...He was making fun of reading, writing and painting?? I mean he shouldn't make fun of her for /any/ hobby, but those are such common ones???

29points

allypallyplaytime , Karolina Kaboompics Report

#11

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again He threw a bottle of beer at me so hard and fast the bottle cap stuck in the wall. I should have left and never gone back. Yes it got worse, yes I got out eventually.

Final score:

68points

POST

Chich 1 month ago

We had only been dating a short while when I had a glass of water explode on the wall by my head because I would not suddenly take a week off work to go visit one of her friends. It didn't last and I did not give it a chance to get worse. Been there before.

43points

#12

Relentless pursuit after I rejected him. We are taught to think that pursuit means they are interested in us and that it’s romantic to be chased. But really, it’s a red flag that highlights their inability to respect the word “no”.

After 5 years of an emotionally abusive relationship, I always paid attention to that.

lydviciousss Report

Final score:

65points

POST

Okiedokie 1 month ago (edited)

The one who won’t take ‘no’ for an answer the first 250 times is still not going to take ‘no’ for an answer after you say ‘yes.’ It’s just far, far harder to see the red flags once you say yes. The pushiness that you caved to will turn on you. Fast.

14points

#13

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again She literally tried to break up with me and told me she was bad for me and I convinced her she wasn’t. Turns out she was right. I was in that relationship for 6 years and married her. Most traumatic relationship of my life and took years of therapy to undo the damage. People will tell you who they are in many ways and you need to listen.

Kaystew666 , Alex Green Report

Final score:

62points

POST

Montanavanna 1 month ago

I had a friend that I gave 3 chances too. She would bring bad people into my life. We had a whole discussion about how she will be cut out again if she does it. I finally cut her out for good when detectives were questioning me because she decided to forge checks using my computer. Also said I was involved in a robbery that I had no idea even occurred til I am sitting in the cop shop answering all their questions.

13points

#14

Honestly I think I was the problem in my early relationships. I grew up with an abusive mom who told me she should have aborted me. And I think that f****d me up for a long time and I wasn't the best partner. Or the best version of me. I didn't purposefully hurt anyone but I can't say I didn't.

Acciosab Report

Final score:

60points

POST

Richard Doyle 1 month ago

Insight means you can change.

31points

#15

His parents kept telling me that “You do know he has anger issues, right??” And my dumb a*s was like “It’s OK! I love him!”

Those anger issues were a huge part of our ultimate breakup. When someone’s family members warn you about their negative qualities (barring unusual circumstances, like toxicity within the family), LISTEN TO THEM.

patentlydorky Report

Final score:

59points

POST

Alexandra 1 month ago

If you thought your love was going to make his anger issues go away, you fell into the trap many women fall in: the believe that their love has the power to transform someone from a raging heap of aggression into a stable, nurturing and trustworthy person. No: people seldom change and if they do, it's because there is something in it for them.

23points

#16

He was so sweet and shy when we met. When he told me his doctor diagnosed him as a sociopath. I was like "aww no youre not". Anyways, it wasnt long after that he started beating me. He was in fact, a sociopath, and he literally told me but my dumb a*s was like, nah.

captaincumragx Report

Final score:

54points

POST

Memaw Mitch 1 month ago

My ex told me he was anti social, my dumass thought that meant he wasn't a people person. Right from day 0, said he was friends with my current bf, got my number off his phone when he borrowed it for a min. Before he even called his plan was in place, he manipulating me saying you should hear the bad things my current bf was saying about me, but don't tell him. Because you're too good for him... Charmer, liked EVERYTHING I liked, I was on his pedestal, for months. Until I was sick and he said I can't do sick. But the next day brought flowers to help me get well (he knew I already was feeling better). Eventually we lived together and I couldn't cut onions right, house not clean enough, random comments like you won't put out, I'll find it someone else who will. 5 years in, he'd never been physically abusive until one night he tried to kill me and make it look like suicide. Found preparatory he left behind with diagnosis Antisocial Personality Disorder, with psychotic tendencies.

29points

Mental_Gift_8997 , Karolina Kaboompics Report

#17

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again The first red flag was that they rejected my feelings and concerns. I should've paid more attention to that.

Final score:

48points

POST

Chich 1 month ago

Milky tears? that can't be good.

14points

#18

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Dismissed their constant need to control everything as just “being protective”.

SmallHazel , Monstera Production Report

Final score:

46points

POST

Learner Panda 1 month ago

Ex did this. Total control over everything by withholding sleep. All work that needed doing in the house had to be paid for in advance with s*x.

26points

#19

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Being told he'd worried I wouldn't be 'intellectual' enough for him, but not to worry, because I'd passed.

First thought at the time was "bell-end". Definitely should've trusted those instincts...

MelonBump , Cristian Benavides Report

Final score:

45points

POST

Diolla 1 month ago

"bell-end"???... Oh 😁 that was worth googling 😁

21points

#20

She gave away her dog of six years because he got sick (before I met her). Didn’t really stop and think how insanely f****d up that is. Makes me hate her thinking about it.

BaginaJon Report

Final score:

44points

POST

Amelia Jade 1 month ago

Ugh! This makes me so sad.

18points

#21

Intense jealousy of my daughter being in my life.

citereh17 Report

Final score:

44points

POST

ILoveMySon 1 month ago

Oh boy. I am extremely angry just READING this.

17points

imurdigigirlfriend , Kerde Severin Report

#22

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Even though they were 'too busy' to respond to texts, they managed to spend the entire day posting on social media.

notSanii: Dude, this annoys me to my core. Most recently, a guy I was talking to used to run Call of Duty with me all the time, and now when I ask to chill and game he says he’s too tired for games. An hour later I see that he’s gaming with his friends.

His excuse: 'they asked me.' Man, it’s all BS. Just say you don’t care to hang out anymore. Same with the social media thing, they simply don’t care to talk anymore.

Final score:

44points

POST

#23

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again People would give me a weird look when I told them who I was dating, and ask why. They’d say he had a reputation for being an a*****e, but hey maybe he’s different once you get to know him. Turns out he was, in fact, an a*****e.

Willing-Hour3643: That she didn't get along with anybody. She was an argumentative and controlling person in all of her personal relationships."

I ignored all that and thought she'd change but after I was with her, I saw that she blamed everyone for her own shortcomings and had anger issues and mental issues and refused to get help

GlamSpam , Afeez Ajibola Yusuf Report

Final score:

43points

POST

Widdershins66 1 month ago

There's always one, Joen. 🤡

5points

Numerous_Leading_544 , Trinity Kubassek Report

#24

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Oof… I ignored a lot.

1. Him admitting he cheated on his ex multiple times.
2. Having a lot of girls on his snap/social media.
3. Finding hair ties/girl items in his room around the time we became official.
4. Love-bombing
5. Flirty with other women. Teetering on the boundary between friendship and inappropriate.

Final score:

43points

POST

Jaya 1 month ago

Having a lot of girls on your social media, doesn't mean anything. Some people connect more with boys, some more with girls, and some don't have a preference.

19points

#25

My (36f) first month with my last bf, I had plans to go to the Renaissance fair with some friends and invited him but he had to work. he acted super pissed the night before that I was still going without him. then the next morning he called me saying he was having a stroke (42m, smoker) and I was like omg call 911, I’m omw to your apartment.

he says no, don’t come over. so I wait. he calls me from the hospital (that he drove to!) 30 min later and says his brother met him there. at this point it’s clear it wasn’t a stroke, and I say can I come meet you, which hospital. he says no.

so I take my friends to the Ren fair and text and call to check on him. he ends up flipping out on me saying I should never have gone since he was in the hospital. I just thought since we had only been dating a month, and his family was there, and he wouldn’t cooperate in telling me which hospital to go to, or where to meet him to see him, AND HE WAS FINE, I didn’t think cancelling my plan was appropriate, or even what he wanted.

This set the stage for the rest of the relationship. He would never admit to what he wanted or needed, and actually would tell me the opposite of what he needed, sincerely, even when I said ah but let me take care of you! or whatever. Histrionic displays and tantrums are a big red flag and you need to leave immediately.

It ended in him almost killing me during a tantrum on a camping trip two years later. They do not change for you, once you show them you’ll stay through their bad behavior.

ballzonnmyface Report

Final score:

43points

POST

Lola July 1 month ago

You know he never went to the hospital right? He was fronting.

47points

Fantastic_Photo_8660 , Yan Krukau Report

#26

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again He was a mama's boy. Girl, no matter what... they never change and you'll never be first 🤷🏻‍♀️

PD: And he'll cheat on you because the only person he needs to be loyal to is his mom 😅.

Final score:

42points

POST

Jaya 1 month ago

I really doubt there's a connection between being a mama's boy and being a cheater.

14points

#27

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again It wasn’t one red flag, it was red bunting. She basically told me the story of how she screwed over every boyfriend she’d ever had (and there were a lot). I finally realised these were a warning but she’d shredded my heart and set fire to the pieces by then.

NotoriousREV , Alex Green Report

Final score:

40points

POST

Alexandra 1 month ago

Uhm, she literally told you what kind of a person she was right from the start. I wonder what you saw in her to make you dismiss all of that.

13points

StTickleMeElmosFire Report

#28

A real pattern of stories in which they were always the victim, with no apparent introspection / admission around their own role in any given issue or situation. And wouldn’t you know it….

Final score:

40points

POST

highwaycrossingfrog 1 month ago (edited)

My friend is like this. She's a lovely person and a lot of fun, but boy is she always the victim. Her neighbours have it in for because they sometimes take up slightly too much space with their cars on her street *with unallocated parking* and make it hard for her to manoeuvre into the spot outside her house. She keeps changing jobs and even careers because every single job she's ever had her boss doesn't like her and deliberately sabotages her. She's an expert at seeing the negative in any situation. It actually makes her physically ill because she is so super stressed all the time

13points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

See Also on Bored Panda

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#29

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again When they brushed off my boundaries like they were suggestions.

mariana96as: I should’ve known my ex didn’t know what boundaries are when I saw that his parents have two toilets facing each other in their bathroom. The whole family is insane

No__direction: Mine didn’t even have a bathroom door. Just a curtain. They removed the door! No knocking either. They’d look through the curtain, stair for a long moment the say 'hurry up' or walk away with an irritated vibe.

Boundaries did not exist in that house. Everything was everyone’s business… even my sister’s monthly cycle

SnowyShoreline09 , Odonata Wellnesscenter Report

Final score:

37points

POST

PattyK 1 month ago

… stare for a long …

7points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

#30

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again So many! I feel like an idiot thinking back.
But the biggest one: he kept saying ¨Im not good at relationships¨
plot twist, he wasnt

insert shocked pikachu face.

Extension_Lack194 , Keira Burton Report

Final score:

37points

POST

Lola July 1 month ago

When they tell you who they are, believe them. He's a horrible partner...

17points

See Also on Bored Panda

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#31

Started seeing a 40F who accused every partner she's had since she was a freshman in high school of being abusive & controlling (including, eventually, both me and the guy she left me for)

One is unfortunate. Two or three means maybe some therapy is in order. Fifteen to twenty means you might be projecting a little bit (spoiler: she was abusive and controlling).

BroseppeVerdi Report

Final score:

35points

POST

LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago

I am reminded of a quote from the movie "Lucky Number Slevin". This isn't the exact quote that the character The Rabbi says, but it's paraphrased: "If one man calls you a horse, you punch him in the nose. If another man calls you a horse, you hit him in the stomach. If a third man calls you a horse, well, then, maybe it's time to go shopping for a saddle."

13points

livelaughshop , KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA Report

#32

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Lack of car for his younger brother. first time i slept over and we went to pick up breakfast for us and his younger brother. we didn’t realize they messed up his brother’s order (they legit gave us an untoasted mcmuffin, nothing else). it was literally a 2 min drive so i insisted we go back quickly as we just pulled into the driveway. he refused, didnt even offer to give his younger brother his order instead and got mad when i offered mine up. told his brother to deal with it and i got in MY car and drove to get the right order for his brother. i didnt mind as it was a 2 minute drive and i didnt want him eating a plain untoasted mcmuffin, plus we were left to take care of him since their parents were out of town for business.

Final score:

30points

POST

LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago

OP acted like more of a sibling to the younger brother than OP's ex did >_>;

9points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

See Also on Bored Panda

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#33

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again I just broke up with someone who would belittle my hobbies and interests at any given opportunity I’m sorry I hope you find someone who appreciates you.

Its_Curse: This exactly. About two weeks into the relationship he spent 30 minutes telling me how sh**ty and absolute garbage he thought my favorite band was. I got upset and he said 'Well I'm not making fun of you, just this sh*t band.'
He then proceeded to mock me for literally everything I liked and did for the next two years. My taste in music, my favorite shows, my hobbies, what I liked to eat, what I read, what I wore, my friends, my family. He once literally turned me picking a bagel for breakfast into a screaming match about how I only eat gross sh*t and how I do it on purpose to upset him (I had no idea he didn't like bagels???).
It turns out it was never about the bagel or the music. He was just a controlling and abusive nightmare and was taking his bad day out on me. I left him after he physically assaulted me. I wish my self esteem had been good enough for me to get out of there sooner. I still have CPTSD over it all.

anxiousBarnes: And of course their hobbies are so much more important than yours. I hate that so much. Used to be with a guy who liked 'educational' passtimes like learning new languages and playing instruments and bs like that (all stuff his parents forced into him from a young age) so of course me wanting to read comics and take hip hop dance classes for fun was obviously just absurd and beneath him.

ShoesOverboard , Alex Green Report

Final score:

30points

POST

Beak Hookage 1 month ago

That guy with the long dreads sure shows up a lot in articles like this one.

15points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

See Also on Bored Panda

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#34

He constantly talked down about other women. He would comment on their weight, the clothes they wore, would criticize their tattoos, literally anythinggggg and as time went on I was no different when it came to facing his ridicule. Learned a difficult and forever life altering lesson with him.

ZealousidealToe9439 Report

Final score:

29points

POST

goldoche 3 weeks ago

Yeah, same here. But I was "not like the other girls", you know 🙄 confronted him each time, but still stayed...

1point

whatthewebshouldbe Report

#35

The first time I saw my ex acting upset snapping at his roommate while making dinner, I gently laid my hand on his arm and asked "Is something wrong?" He yelled "IM FINE" and kept yelling at me all night, angry at me for "prying". Turns out he would treat me like this every time he was upset for the next few years.

Final score:

29points

POST

Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 1 month ago

I quite literally would melt if someone was sweet like that when i was upset or mad- i cannot understand people

13points

#36

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again The age gap. I was very newly 18, she was 31.

Scarecrowqueen , olia danilevich Report

Final score:

28points

POST

Andrew Irish 1 month ago

My first serious relationship was with one of my high school teachers, I was 17 and homeless and she was 37 and single. It messed me up so badly I got into one horribly abusive relationship after another once she was finished with me.

15points

Andrew Irish 1 month ago

Until I took years off of dating to heal and go to therapy. Eventually, meeting the lady in the picture, my amazing wife. ;)

14points

StrangeOne 1 month ago (edited)

Wtf??? I swear adults who are a lot older than a teenager, but go after teenagers when they reach 18 must be closet pedos who are trying to keep it "legal" so they don't get charged.

6points

Ace 1 month ago (edited)

Attraction to an 18 year old is not paedophilia. Not saying it's right, but it's a very different sort (and level) of wrong.

6points

Trundle 1 month ago

Look at all creepy perverts taking a break from looking through high school girls Instagram pages to defend the obvious groomer. Nothing surprising about that unfortunately

4points

Urbangirlatl 1 month ago (edited)

It's more than the gap, it's also stage of life. 18-31 is not the same as 30-43, for example. "Half plus 8" is a good rule of thumb. Half you age, then add 8. That's the youngest you should date. I know it sounds arbitrary (and I'm sure I'll get flak), but think of any example. A 31 y.o. dating younger than 23/24 is weird. A 20 y.o. dating an 18 y.o. wouldn't cause any raised eyebrows. 60-25? Weird. 34-25, sure!

3points

Sand Ers 1 month ago

None of your business? All of them.

-2points

Miki 1 month ago

Meh. Imo It's not a red flag.

2points

Rachel Pelz 1 month ago

13 year age gap...not necessarily a red flag if both have some life experience as an adult. But newly adult and much older person would make me wonder if and why adult can't find partner with similar life experience...

5points

Khavrinen 1 month ago

Mrs. Robinson?

1point

Lyoness 1 month ago

How do we spell it again? Oh, that's right. G. R. O. O. M. I. N. G.

1point

Pencil McGovern 1 month ago (edited)

We have no information here that 31 groomed 18 in any way. They could have met at a party or a bookstore and 31 simply asked 18 out and 18 said yes. Let's reserve that word for the criminally manipulative intent it's meant to describe. [Edited to correct my gender assumptions as correctly pointed out by @TheBlueBitterfly.]

2points

Manel Ibáñez 1 month ago

Two consenting adults? No need to judge here. Sometimes the age gap is an advantage in a relationship as long as it’s based on love and mutual respect. There’s no need to asume bad intentions just because the age gap. That’s just a prejudice.

1point

Alexandra 1 month ago

Yes, they are 2 adults and no, they don't have the same level of life experience, simply because one is just 18 and the other 31. At 18, your brain is still developing; this only finishes in your twenties. So there is a huge imbalance.

21points

Jenny Mason 1 month ago

It is more like ephebophilia, which is an attraction to people ages 15-19. Hebephilia is an attraction to people post-puberty to 15ish. Paedophilia is an attraction to prepubescent people.

1point

Michael Danhauer 1 month ago

Is it prejudice when an overwhelming majority of said relationships end in failure? Just because there are exceptions doesn't mean the rule doesn't apply.

1point

Lisbeth Guz 1 month ago (edited)

The problem is not only the age gap, but the power imbalance. Someone who is 31 is probably independent, has their own money, lives in their own place while someone who is 18 has none of these things, are not mature enough and sometimes are easy too impress. The older person has more power over the youngest

0points

Apatheist Account2 1 month ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

TheBlueBitterfly 1 month ago (edited)

Because sex is the ONLY important thing in a relationship, right?? /s 🙄 (And contrary to BP's graphic, nowhere does it say this was a man and a woman.)

5points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

See Also on Bored Panda

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#37

The fact that he only seemed to show love or affection through gifts/financial things.

Turns out the entire relationship was based around manipulation, financial abuse, and control. Took a lot of work to unfuck that situation.

AshumSmashums Report

Final score:

28points

POST

Apatheist Account2 1 month ago

Censors are having a day off (or off day) today...

22points

#38

He was rude (verbally abusive) towards his mum over something minor. Didn’t take him long to treat me the same over minor things, only even worse. .

XLittleMagpieX Report

Final score:

28points

POST

Alexandra 1 month ago

It's said that if you want to know how a man will treat you, look at the way he treats his mother.

10points

Extension_Lack194 , Diva Plavalaguna Report

#39

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Flakiness and excuses.

Say_Fellas: Second this. The flakiness. Saying they’ll do something then forgetting about it. Cheap words that get your hopes high with nothing to show at the end of it. Not just a few times but Again and Again until you realise it is who they are.

Final score:

27points

POST

Monica G 1 month ago

Narcisissts

2points

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

See Also on Bored Panda

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#40

On the first date she said "I'm kind of obsessive"

She then proceeded to stalk me for a year after I broke up with her. Fortunately, we were both in the military, and she transferred to another command eventually.

ThatScottGuy Report

Final score:

26points

POST

Alexandra 1 month ago

Should someone like that be in the military at all? I mean, if she's not a marksman?

16points

Puzzleheaded_Gap8804 , RDNE Stock project Report

#41

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Caught him in a lie...but let it go. Im stupid.

Final score:

25points

POST

Cathleen Cummings 1 month ago

You're not stupid, just human. I had a "boyfriend" for a while that lied as frequently as he breathed, I overlooked it far too long.

7points

#42

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again Didn't want to spend his free time with me.

merri_is_ok , mikoto.raw Photographer Report

Final score:

23points

POST

UKGrandad 1 month ago

Depends on whether she means 'any' of his free time, in which case he's clearly not interested, or 'all' of his free time, in which case she's being suffocating.

17points

Traditional-Can-6593 Report

#43

‘Concerns’ that are subtly manipulative so that it will guilt trip you into doing what he wants you to do

Example, don’t accept the overseas scholarship because you will not be able to afford living there or have me around for support. It translated into please don’t go away from me because I am afraid you will find someone else better than me.

Final score:

23points

POST

See Also on Bored Panda

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

#44

Not wanting to talk about anything serious 99% of the time.

No_Listen5389 Report

Final score:

22points

POST

#45

The first night we had sex I spent the night at his apartment. In the morning we were laying in bed naked and his doorbell rings. It was his ex-wife and his 4 year old daughter. He had “forgotten” that he was watching her for the morning. I literally grabbed my clothes and hid in his closet until his ex left. Then he plopped his daughter in front of the tv and snuck me out the door behind her.

Oh, he was also broke and turned out to be an alcoholic.

frisbeemassage Report

Final score:

22points

POST

ILoveMySon 1 month ago

Charming.

17points

#46

She got upset with me because I didn't ask her if she wanted to drive. It was my car.

jfellrath Report

Final score:

21points

POST

SheamusFanFrom1987 1 month ago

Okay, unpopular take, but if we are dating/married unless I have seen and confirmed that you are careful enough in handling that level of machinery, I'll be the one that drives you around. Firstly, because I want both of us arriving safe and sound. Secondly, any potential repairs (knock on wood) may cost as much an arm and a leg as an accident (again, knock on wood). Lastly, most times I'm the driver anyways when it comes to travelling so why not?

-3points

Medium_Minute_4170 Report

#47

He was 22 and I was a known 16 yr old technically homeless girl (living in condemned housing). .

Final score:

20points

POST

ILoveMySon 1 month ago

😥😥😥😥

8points

#48

"Left Her Boyfriend To Be With Me": 50 Red Flags People Wouldn't Ignore In A Partner Again That she didn't get along with anybody. She was an argumentative and controlling person in all of her personal relationships. I ignored all that and thought she'd change but after I was with her, I saw that she blamed everyone for her own shortcomings and had anger issues and mental issues and refused to get help.

Willing-Hour3643 , Budgeron Bach Report

Final score:

19points

POST

Learner Panda 1 month ago

Duplicate post.

4points

#49

He had a back up girl incase i said no to being his girlfriend… we were together for over a year after that, not my proudest moment.

lanaowo4 Report

Final score:

18points

POST

Pencil McGovern 1 month ago

I hope the "backup" girl found out and left him, too.

6points

#50

She used to open sandwiches and remove anything she don't like, then tried to do the same thing to me...

baxtet Report

Final score:

16points

POST

Apatheist Account2 1 month ago

Well, you can function with 1 kidney...

12points

Note: this post originally had 65 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.

Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

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Hey there! I'm Shelly, a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. When I'm not working, you'll often find me immersed in creativity, whether it's creating animations, 3D and traditional art, writing, or making music.I've been drawing since I was little, and my passion for visual storytelling really took off after I finished a 2-year Film Academy. It ignited my existing spark for bringing stories to life through visuals. Since then, I've been diving deeper into art and tech, always exploring new ways to tell compelling stories.

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What do you think ?

POST

UKGrandad 1 month ago

First date; drinks, dinner, club. Walked her home, she asked me in. Poured some wine, we carried on talking, then she said she had a surprise for me. Told me to wait while she went upstairs. Five minutes later she calls for me to close my eyes, then 'You can look now.' She was stood in front of me wearing a wedding dress, veil, the works. 'I just wanted you to see how I'll look on our wedding day!' She was completely serious, too. I said my goodbyes and there was no second date.

15points

Pencil McGovern 1 month ago

That is seriously unhinged.

10points

Darth Kittius 1 month ago

Here is a red flag I learned from each of my exes: 1. If he sulks about your boundaries until you lower said boundaries, he's gonna do a lot more than what he said he would. 2. He sent me photos of fresh self-harm Wounds to guilt trip me (he also blames his admittance into a psychiatric facility for 3 weeks on me). 3. If he says you're just friends because he has a girlfriend, but you do "date" stuff anyway without your notice, you're helping him cheat. It's harder to tell than I thought it would be. 4. If he won't introduce you to any of his friends, take any photos with you, or hang out with you before 10 PM, you're the other woman. 5. Led me on for 2 years, said we were dating and then flip-flopped. Mama's boy in the bad way.

6points

Doctor Strange 1 month ago

This one is a bit overly simplified, the actual situation was much more complex. I met her when she was seeing someone else and we became friends. Guy was a jerk, and treated her badly, so I spent a lot of time listening to her relationship woes and trying to help. She had a really bad car accident, the kind she was lucky just to survive, let alone walk away unscathed. But she had horrible nightmares. After that, only I could talk her down and help her sleep. Wasn't long until she told me she was falling for another guy and didn't know what to do and was asking for advice. Those smarter than me would realize she was talking about me. I foolishly trusted her when she said she would deal with the other guy before we started dating. The red flag though, was that she spent a lot of time talking about him and what he was doing. That relationship ultimately ended with her admitting she was deliberately pushing me to commit sui cide

3points

Nikole 1 month ago

That, uh, took quite a turn… Jesus.

4points

Susical 3 weeks ago

One guy lied to me - twice - on the first date. He lied about where he was living and about ZOOM "business meetings" he had. Turns out he'd just gotten out of rehab. He was living in a sober house, and the ZOOMs were AA meetings. Silly me thought, "Oh, I can see why he was embarrassed about that" and forgave him. But the lying had only begun. To be fair to myself, I've never met such a good liar - before or since - truly talented liar. Thankfully I broke up with him after a few months.

1point

GenericPanda09 1 month ago

"I was only joking" A response an unsurprising amount of abusers use as their first line of defence to try and gaslight you into thinking it's a problem with your sense of humour and not their behaviour.

1point

Binky Melnik 1 month ago (edited)

I want to rip my hair out reading these! Sooo many are of the “Met someone who behaved/treated me badly. When we broke up three years later…” variety. I can’t understand this at all! The MOMENT someone treats me badly or behaves like a jerk, my privates shrivel right up. There is NO more attraction, and I suddenly find them unattractive both inside and outside. Buh-bye! Why doesn’t it happen to everyone? I don’t get it. Why do these people seem to love this bad behavior and wanna keep repeating it for years? Are they out of their minds or am I?

1point

Susical 3 weeks ago

It's not that people "love" the bad behavior. It's that so many of us grew up in unhealthy environments with abuse and trauma, so those things feel NORMAL now. It can take a lot of therapy (or some kind of healing) to get past that stuff.

0points

Skadi Lifdis 1 month ago

Hindsight is 20/20. With my ex, the times he went into full shutdown mode when I was having health/ other issues (pulmonary emboli, two extremely difficult pregnancies, and the death of my oldest son). At the end of our "relationship", I was working full time barely keeping us afloat while he was unemployed, slept all day, drank and talked to women all night. He threw temper tantrums all the time and during one of the last fights before the end, screamed in my face that my oldest son was dead (for context, I received a large life insurance payout that enabled me to buy a house) because I told him to get out of MY house if he was going to destroy things. He screamed it was HIS house and then that it was my dead son's house and that my son was dead. It took being used as a literal punching bag to get him out of the house and out of my life.

1point

Ellinor 1 month ago

I once dated a guy who was friend with my bullies. Do I really need to tell more ?

1point

Ken Schroeder 1 month ago

We had just moved in together. Two weeks later, I come home from work to find her ex-boyfriend sitting in my chair and eating my left-over Mongolian Beef with a s**t-eating grin on his face.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 1 month ago

I think these were tiny red flags, so small that I didn't notice for years. But he had no ideas of his own. Every date we went on, my idea. Every vacation, I did the planning, I took the initiative. Every gift, I pointed out or picked out (I actually picked out my engagement ring, that one should have been a big red flag). Every single thing we did, was my idea. Many years later I saw it for what it was: a true lack of effort. He didn't care enough to put in an effort to our relationship, any romance. He was truly lazy. No effort in anything, not me, not his job, he'd have the most ridiculous excuses for not doing chores. I realized I had married a lazy, manchild. But the thing I should have noticed so many years ago was how little effort he actually put into us being together. He still makes me the bad guy in our divorce.

0points

John Nelson 1 month ago

Things were going well, she asked if we could go by her mother's house to drop some things off. No problem, don't mind meeting her mom anyway. We get there, she doesn't introduce me, just throws her laundry at her mom's feet and goes "Here, I'll be back in a couple hours to pick it up" and walks out. Nope! Never went out with her again.

0points

Fabulous chocolate cookie 1 month ago (edited)

Three red flags I ignored for too long in my past relationship were: - constant negative self talk. She was so negative about herself and the future that everything I tried didn't matter as she had no positive view. When we broke up she didn't even wanted to try to fix our problems first but was sure her negative view was right. - social media usage. She was addicted to it. Especially tiktok with romance videos was a daily thing. - bad sleep schedule. The sleep schedule was so bad that during a period it was that we never were able to speak during the day as I was awake and she was sleeping, with then her being awake during the nights as her sleep schedule was being awake from 11PM till 4AM and mine 6AM till 10PM. - constant fights with her parents till the point I could only hear screaming from both sides over the phone or when I was there. But the worst one I ignored was her d**g usage. Almost daily or bi-daily she was smoking weed with her neighbor or using pills.

0points

POST

UKGrandad 1 month ago

15points

Pencil McGovern 1 month ago

That is seriously unhinged.

10points

Darth Kittius 1 month ago

6points

Doctor Strange 1 month ago

3points

Nikole 1 month ago

That, uh, took quite a turn… Jesus.

4points

Susical 3 weeks ago

1point

GenericPanda09 1 month ago

1point

Binky Melnik 1 month ago (edited)

1point

Susical 3 weeks ago

0points