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People tend to seek consistency in their attitudes, so when we hold two contradictory beliefs and our thoughts do not align with our actions, we may experience discomfort.

Whether we're aware of it or not, this inconsistency — called cognitive dissonance — can motivate us to seek ways to reduce the unpleasant feelings it causes, such as by rejecting or avoiding new information.

(You know that drinking too much alcohol is harmful to your health, but you do it anyway and rationalize it by pointing to your high stress levels.)

Interested in how all of this manifests in everyday life, Reddit user Independent_Ad_3915 asked everyone else on the platform, "What's the worst example of cognitive dissonance you've seen in real life?"

Here are some of the answers they have received. It sounds like we're pretty good at lying to ourselves.

#1

45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Ugh. I had a (now ex) best friend who had a pregnancy scare. She was super pro-life, very conservative Republican. I asked her what she was going to do and what support she needed from me, and she said she was considering getting an a******n if she was pregnant. When I seemed surprised, she said, "well, it's different for me. I'm not a s**t like those other girls. I'm not ready for a baby. It's different..." We stopped being friends after that. I couldn't handle it anymore.

wannabeginger , cottonbro studio Report

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Jill Rhodry
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, I'm sure it's 'different' for all the conservative politician's wives, daughters, girlfriends when they can afford to go interstate for a medical procedure.

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    #2

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors People who purport to live their lives like Jesus, and yet are hateful and judgmental, and non-accepting which is the exact opposite of what the man was about, historically.

    Interesting_Gift4953 , JCWilmore Report

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    CrunChewy McSandybutt
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fun fact: "Taking the Lord's name in vain" isn't about using curse words with God's name in it, but about using his name to justify hateful behavior.

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    We got in touch with Independent_Ad_3915, and they were kind enough to take a little time and have a chat with us about their post.

    "I sat down thinking about what would be a good question that everyone could associate with in some meaningful way," they told Bored Panda about its origins. "I remember thinking, 'What is your happiest memory? Or, biggest recurring thought? Or, biggest self-delusion?'"

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    "I then decided on a question that focuses on how someone views the thoughts of others."

    #3

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Brexit voters who live in Spain and other parts of the EU. Voting to kick out foreigners without realising that they are the foreigners is peak cognitive dissonance.

    No-Village-6781 , Franz Wender Report

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    Red Reilly
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This was the stupidest thing we have done recently, OH seeing all the Brits living in Spain, moaning that they are getting screwed over, YOU VOTED FOR THIS!! It is your fault!

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    #4

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Illegal immigrants are taking our jobs!



    I wouldn't have a problem with illegal immigrants if they would work instead of coming here to live off of welfare!



    Said within minutes of each other out of the same mouth.

    Kooky_Ad_5139 , Sam Report

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    pfeils wife
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it’s been said once, it’s been said a thousand times. We are all immigrants. The USA thrives with immigrants.

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    The Redditor noticed that there were a lot of references to American politics in the answers. "Some people were just putting in 'Democrats' or 'Republicans' as their answer."

    That might be due to the fact that over the past years, Democrats and Republicans have both grown increasingly likely to view members of the opposing party through a negative lens.

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    A 2022 poll found that majorities of Democrats describe Republicans as being more closed-minded, dishonest, immoral, and unintelligent than other Americans; majorities of Republicans describe Democrats as each of the above, with the further addition of lazy.

    #5

    Republicans blocking Obama's nomination of Merrick Garland to the SCOTUS because, by their argument, "It was too close to the election (more than a year away), and we should let the people decide the next president first before we name a new SCOTUS member."

    Then, within *3 months* of the 2020 election, RBG dies and Republicans rush in and confirm their nominee as fast as they can before the election to make sure it's stacked with another conservative in case Biden wins.

    There is just no excuse for that blatant, absolutely transparent level of hypocrisy.

    Such defines the American right-wing.

    Puzzleheaded-Ear858w Report

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    Aaron W
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They know they are lying. You know they are lying. You know they know they are lying, and they know you know they are lying. They just don't care.

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    #6

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors People who have generational wealth, but then claim they “pulled themselves up by their bootstraps” and “worked their a*s off to get where they are,” while claiming everyone else is just lazy.

    Whatchab , Alexander Mils Report

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    Stephanie Did It
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Pulling oneself up by one's bootstraps" is literally impossible. You cannot physically lift yourself up by pulling on the thing you're standing on. So the delusion that they've self-levitated is popular with these toxic people.

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    "I don't think there is a world where people can fully live true to any belief system," the author of the post said. "Because the reality around us will give us particular situations that will force us to compromise or even betray those beliefs in some way."

    "Most people aren't even aware of that; however, they are overly strong on the power of belief and the ideal of 'I am right.' And what you think in your head does not match facts on the ground is where cognitive dissonance will occur. That does not mean there is no higher morality or ethics that people should aspire to."

    "To put it simply, people need to accept that the reality in their minds and the real world rarely match each other 100 percent on every topic," they added.

    #7

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors “This weather is crazy!!! It was never like this when I was a kid.” meets “climate change is a hoax.”

    alken0901 , pxhere Report

    #8

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors For those of us who work/have worked in retail during the holiday season:

    "I can't believe they have you working on Christmas Eve, Boxing Day/insert holiday here..."

    It's you. It's because of YOU I'm working. Cuz you're here, shopping on a public holiday. 🙄

    Trigger-Hippie9186 Report

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    Annymoose
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I protest this by doing the only thing I can, not shopping on those days. Not even online. It's ridiculous.

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    But interestingly, cognitive dissonance can sometimes be a tool for personal and social change. Drawing a person's attention to the disparity between their behavior and their values may increase their awareness of the inconsistency and empower them to act.

    For example, a 2019 study noted that dissonance-based interventions may be helpful for people with eating disorders. This approach works by encouraging patients to say things or role-play behaviors that contradict their beliefs about food and body image, creating dissonance.

    The theory behind this approach is that, in order to resolve it, a person's implicit beliefs about their body and thinness will change, reducing their desire to limit food intake.

    So a lot depends on the circumstances.

    #9

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Conservatives decrying they want government to leave them alone while supporting bans on gay marriage, access to women's health, etc.

    NewPresWhoDis , Fibonacci Blue Report

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One that really f****d me up hard, the right thinks it would be okay to deny their child anti biotics if their religion told them too.

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    #10

    Modern Christianity in the USA. It’s literally the opposite of what Jesus taught.

    michaelb1 Report

    #11

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My mom who rushes to do all the chores herself and then complains when nobody else does them. And then if someone else does it she complains that it’s not being done the way she does it

    Legal_Bridge990 Report

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    #12

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors "This is what happens under socialism" Republicans talking about something happening now under capitalism

    Paisable , Karolina Grabowska Report

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    panther
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But they love socialism for the rich and corporations, just not for the people who need it, because they would have to raise taxes on the rich and corporations.

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    #13

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors I will NEVER forget this interaction with a human equivalent of a papercut:

    “So, are you getting the vaccine now that you’re pregnant?”

    “No! I don’t know what it’ll do to my baby” (IMMEDIATELY takes a drag from a cigarette)

    TheSevenDweller , Amina Filkins Report

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    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    but she DOES know what cigarette smoking will do to her baby..see, there's a difference 😜

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    #14

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Simultaneously a Chinese bioweapon and just a cold

    ineedjuice , mmmswan Report

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    censorshipsucks
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not just a bioweapon, but also manufactured by billgates as an implant from the illuminati AND also created by 5g radiation. it is in fact four incompatible things. /s

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    #15

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My husband who knows the extreme trauma and is devastated that I suffered so much from being a child victim of abuse and yet angrily defending Mormonism’s unapologetic declaration that clergy shouldn’t have to report abuse when a member confesses it. He’s a securities attorney with high morals and ethics and yet excuses the LDS church of hiding billions of dollars from the govt and their members in shell companies. He supports the homophobic religion despite the fact that he loves and accepts and supports his 2 queer daughters. He could be a case study on brainwashing

    MormonEscapee , Darina Belonogova Report

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    pfeils wife
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This OP is a stronger spouse than I could ever be, remaining married to such a hypocrite

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    #16

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Conversation I had with my former step dad:

    Me: Ignorance is not knowing something, right?

    Him: Yes.

    Me: Willful ignorance is knowing you aren't informed but doing nothing to change it, right?

    Him: Yes.

    Me: So arent you being willfully ignorant about evolution by not bothering to research how it works?

    Him: (instantly offended) Listen. I don't need to research evolution to know that it's impossible for a frog to transmutate into a bird.

    Me: I agree, it's not possible. Transmutation isn't evolution, that's a term used for alchemy to change gold into silver and isn't mentioned in evolution at all. Real evolution takes millions of years and happens because of gradual changes in DNA.

    Him: (storms off) I aint got time for this

    TheMrEM4N , Vera Arsic Report

    #17

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors An American flag next a Confederate flag. They were opposite sides of the same war

    INeedtobeDetained , smwatkins Report

    #18

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Republicans who spout homophobic rhetoric but then are found on Grindr.

    mom_with_an_attitude , Monstera Production Report

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    #19

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My mother told me that many years ago, our family had the children taken and forced to go to a Catholic boarding school. She told me that they cut their hair, beat the kids if they spoke their native language, and forced them to read the Bible and forced out our native belief. The term I've heard is, "They sewed the Bible into their hands." They even outright m******d many kids while not telling the parents anything. I was already horrified, but then my mother told me that we're a Catholic family that believes in Jesus...

    Typical_Credit_4224 , Pixabay Report

    #20

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Person: I don't like black people because so many of them commit crimes and are in jail for dealing drugs.

    Me: But your son got ten years for major drug dealing.

    Person: Yeah, but that's different.

    classactdynamo , Oladimeji Ajegbile Report

    #21

    My mother, an immigrant, talking about immigrants taking over our country

    miamental Report

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    CaptainDinosaur
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The type of mindset that desperate human beings are "illegal" because their paperwork isn't in order is f*****g gross.

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    #22

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors People on government disability payments talking about cutting welfare

    sten45 , AnnaStills Report

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    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They're not talking about cutting 'their' welfare but other welfare like single parents, dole etc

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    #23

    LGBTQ people who vote republican.

    (Although to be fair, I think it's more about class and race privilege for them. Still idiots, though.)

    profmoxie Report

    #24

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors People complaining about other peoples driving while comitting the same errors but its ok because "they are in a hurry"

    f_ranz1224 , Glebcallfives Report

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    CP
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Driving got way less stressful, when I decided that anyone driving aggressive was in an emergency and anyone driving dumb just lost their job. That and I have made at least one mistake while driving, I think.

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    #25

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My ex-boyfriend's mother would sit on her front porch and complain about the neighbors. "Look at those busybodies, sitting on their porch gossiping about everybody. Did you hear that her daughter..."

    She'd also insist her son drive her to the stores first thing after every holiday, so she could buy stuff half price "before the greedy people get there."

    lorinabaninabanana , thekrazycouponlady Report

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    Ellie Hope
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I admit I moan about the supermarket being really busy, my daughter points out that I'm one of those people.

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    #26

    Whole family dies from covid

    *covid isn't real, God just decided it was time to bring them home*

    SunriseSurprize Report

    #27

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors When the pandemic started, a friend of mine got really obsessed with the fact that you can't leave your home or go near people without a mask etc.

    Only thing is it never reflected in his own actions. He judged others but did not follow guidelines himself. He worked at a grocery store at the time and refused to wear a mask his boss told him to wear, meanwhile complaining about people coming to the store without masks and putting his health at risk.

    Jurtaani , Michael Burrows Report

    #28

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Teachers supporting policy makers who want to cut education funding

    sauvignonquesoblanco , Dids Report

    #29

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors SO's grandmother died this year, of cancer, that she had for 10 years. She refused to get treated, refused x-rays because she believed x-rays would give her cancer. 

    Infinite-Condition41 , Anna Shvets Report

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    #30

    The year before the pandemic I moved to Germany and had visited home (US), I was going for a swim at the public rec center I used to frequent and ran into one of the regulars. Telling him about my move to go to grad school and how college in Germany is cheaper.

    While sitting inside the public, city owned rec center, he says "they can just keep that socialist c**p to themselves."

    Friesenplatz Report

    #31

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My alcoholic husband who is completely off the rails and rapidly drinking himself to death and tearing my and our kids' hearts apart, sitting in his chair rambling on about how sorry he feels for a friend who is dealing with a loved one's drug addiction.

    lmcbmc , Dylan de Jonge Report

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an alcoholic I know from experience that he won't recognize it in himself until Alcohol or him being drunk does something to completely and utterly f**k up his life.

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    #32

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My parents are libertarian and hate the idea of socialism.


    They constantly talk about how much they love the library.

    DennisPikePhoto , Guzel Maksutova Report

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    dictatorships and tyranny that dictators and tyrannists try to pass off and label as communism isn't actually communism. It's just tyranny and dictatorships, masquerading as something else. A lot like religion actually.

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    #33

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors I don't know, like 15 f*****g years ago there was a study or poll that came out that said that a higher % of college educated people watch comedy central than watch fox news.

    And my mother has never, ever laid it down. Any time we discuss anything she accuses me of "getting my news from comedians", just because I use to watch Jon Stewart, and now occasionally watch John Oliver.

    When the news dropped that Exxon had insider memos knowing they knew about climate change, and their hand in it, my mom and I had a discussion.

    I cited articles from Reuters, Bloomberg, and the BBC.

    My mom literally pulled up Exxon's website, and basically said "See? Exxon says it is fine and they are innocent", and then at the end of our discussion, still came at me for "getting my news from comedians", when I was the only one who actually cited a news source....

    BigBadZord , comedycentral Report

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    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "there was a study or poll that came out that said that a higher % of college educated people watch comedy central than watch fox news." Comedy Central is less biased and often more accurate than Fox news.

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    #34

    Farmers who survive on government subsidies complaining about the “welfare state”

    DangerBrewin Report

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate some farmers. "I just want to make a living" meanwhile they have 3 50,000 dollar trucks millions of dollars in heavy equipment, enough food to feed their family for an entire life time in one sitting, but still they are barely getting by.

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    #35

    My mother showed me a snapshot from her own childhood that showed, in general, her father lying on a childs bed, her sitting next to him between him and the wall. Her brother sitting on the floor in front of the bed, playing with some toys:

    "This is my favourite picture from my childhood! All my siblings always whining and claiming we were abused. It's such b******t. See? It's just a quiet, calm, happy snapshot of a perfectly normal family. Every time one of them starts up about being abused, I remember this snapshot and know that we were fine. Just fine!"

    And so I looked at the picture and asked, "What about the handgun?"

    Because my f*****g grandfather (the wildly violent, gambling, womanizing, utter piece of human garbage) was literally laying there in his kids' room with a handgun in his hand. We aren't Americans. So like... yeah. That s**t ain't normal.

    She had been looking at that picture for HALF A CENTURY, always patting herself on the back that it was proof that her desperate need to insist everything was OK was in any way accurate, and never in all that time, had she apparently ever seen the handgun.

    Mind blown.

    Best part? Within a year, she tried to show me the picture again, again telling me about how it was her favourite and proof that her siblings were full of s**t...

    So maybe she did see the gun.

    kifferella Report

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    #36

    anti-vaxxers dying of preventable diseases

    StinkFingerPete Report

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    censorshipsucks
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    thin out their numbers! https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/f2d94771-a153-4381-a819-c76c19567172

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    #37

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors A neighbour complaining about increasing homelessness and then talking about how she can barely afford her mortgage payments on her rental property ever since interest rates rose higher. "I'm not allowed to raise the rent past a certain amount so now I'm paying the mortgage out of my pocket!"

    Crazy_Ad4505 , Eziz Charyyev Report

    #38

    I met a woman whose brother was killed in combat in Iraq.

    His pointless death made her....become even more of a Republican.

    Because Nancy Pelosi didn't do enough to stop George W. Bush.

    Lady_von_Stinkbeaver Report

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    Stuart
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I twisted a muscle in my brain trying to figure their reasoning out.

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    #39

    My family who constantly make fun of and poke holes in the doctrine of other religions. My family are all Mormons.

    AdSharp4208 Report

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    Ace
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's true of nearly all religions - "We're right, so everybody else is wrong". It's what made me realise, aged around 16, that my own beliefs could not be 'correct', cos that would make billions of other people, from hundreds of different versions of religions, all wrong and therefore condemned to hell. Yeah, right.

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    #40

    People that vote anti-a******n and then vote to eliminate free school lunches

    Burrito_Loyalist Report

    #41

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My mom (who has admittedly come soooo far since this era) used to point out the “trashy” Russian ladies in the grocery store and say that they were using food stamps “paid for by her, and still have an attitude”

    Meanwhile we literally were there purchasing groceries on WIC benefits lmao. Glad she’s overcome her issues there lol

    sweetiepotpie , Hanson Lu Report

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    Chelsea McKee
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In most cases you have to meet work requirements to qualify for food stamps. We need food stamps because companies don't want to pay their employees a living wage. Certain politicians side with the businesses over the common employee and say we shouldn't force a specific hourly wage or demand benefits because they're conducting business, which is theirs to run.

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    #42

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My uncle refuses to acknowledge or give credibility to ANYTHING animated.


    "It's a f*****g cartoon it's not real!"


    "So if we take the factual events of WWII and animate it, it's not real anymore?"


    "Exactly!!!”


    *Face palm*

    TripzPanda , Victoria Borodinova Report

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    Remi (He/Him)
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uncle starts watching "Once upon a time, Life" and suddenly his red blood cells disappear in a poof logic

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    #43

    Nepo babies who actually think they've gotten to where they are in life because they earned it by being so great when in fact their mommy got them the job.

    Subject-Hedgehog6278 Report

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    V
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't really care about nepotism, if people are honest about it. Of course people going to hire friends or family over strangers in most circumstances.

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    #44

    Have a neighbor (in America) with some odd allergies note they prefer to by European market items because of better labeling and more strict control of what goes in the products. While they have their don’t tread on me flags and complaining about mistrusting the government.

    whynotfather Report

    #45

    Working class tory voters.

    TheGreatGrappaApe Report

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    DJR
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I once heard "voting republican is for billionaires and fools; check your wallet to see which you are"

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    #46

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors Speaking as a leftist myself, some people claim to be progressive and say a lot of good things on many issues, but then they'll open their mouths and say the most horrible, dehumanizing, frankly nauseating stuff about fat people. And you realize "Yeah, these people are not progressive at all." They don't understanding the humanity that underpins these issues one bit. They're just playing tribal football, and are actually haters.

    Emu_on_the_Loose , Towfiqu barbhuiya Report

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    Hex Gurls
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i do not get people who are fatphobic, like why are YOU mad that someone else is unhealthy?

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    #47

    [Insert minority] is not being vilified and oppressed by [ruler of our country]

    [Ruler of the country] has done a great job, he took care of them [insert minority]

    Ihavequestion5 Report

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    #48

    45 Times People Didn't Notice The Irony In Their Behaviors My brother sarcastically yelling "well, maybe I have mental issues too!" Moments before kicking my door in half and threatening to attack me.

    AffectionateTwo3405 , Timur Weber Report

    #49

    People who tell me, “it was nice to meet you.”

    ScottPalangi Report

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    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Billy Connolly has a take on this. He says: "Which is better? Someone saying it was nice to meet you and not mean it. Or someone saying I hope you rot in h*ll, and mean it".

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    #50

    Saying "I love animals" and then eating them

    Actual-Parsnip2870 Report