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"Today is yours," we tell people on their birthday. "Enjoy it."

But sadly, nobody, not even Einstein, has owned that much time. If any. And in case we forget, the universe likes to remind us of that.

Bought 60 doughnuts for the office to celebrate? Too bad, you'll need to self-isolate and work from home. Baked yourself a cake? Oops, the floor ate it all.

So what do we do when we get the short end of the stick? The only thing there's left. Laugh. Here's an exclusive Bored Panda list of the most unfortunate birthdays. Enjoy!

#1

I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join

I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join

SlyMoonLlama Report

#2

The Worst Birthday Card I've Ever Gotten

The Worst Birthday Card I've Ever Gotten

randymachokingsavage Report

Birthday rituals are historical and universal events, which have been around since the prehistoric era. But in ancient history, only the privileged had birthdays; the "parties" were solely reserved for kings and nobility members.

Familiar birthday customs and symbols are currently seen among most cultures, however, some people have adopted unique traditions, characterized by their values and way of life.

For example, in ancient Japan, children often died young, so nowadays, in addition to their actual parties, they participate in the 7-5-3 celebration (Shichi-go-san), held on November 15. The name refers to the ages of the children celebrated: any child who reaches age three, boys who reach age five, and girls who reach age seven. They put on fine clothing and visit a religious shrine in thankfulness for their health.

#3

My Kid During His Birthday Safari

My Kid During His Birthday Safari

spencabt Report

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#4

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

CritterBoiFancy Report

#5

Thank You, Facebook

Thank You, Facebook

Pirate_Redbeard Report

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Daniela Strobl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Really... Have the decency to program it to say "We wish you a happy birthday." when it hits below a certain number.

Eppe
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess every single programmer was busy trying to figure out how to shove as many ads as possible down our throats

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Rick
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Facebook sucks for this. Remember that person who had one of those “Your year on Facebook!” complete with virtual balloons and confetti and then it was filled with a slideshow with pictures of her house being burned to the ground?

Philly Bob Squires
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And while we're at it... let's show you past memories of you and and that girl/boy friend who cheated on you with your best friend, together walking your dog that died last year?

Old Crone
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To avoid this exact thing, I set my bday to private. Problem solved.

Lara Kristelle
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For some reason, I think knowing someone's bday by heart sends a warm feeling to the celebrant.

Alice
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is it me or the last sentence "Want to look back on past birthday memories?" sounds sarcastic? Like it's rubing it in his face :(

Noel Benavente
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My perfect birthday, i actually hate when people you haven't seen in years and you barely speak to wish you a Happy Birthday on FB... and you politely have to answer.. THANK you!!

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Another interesting tradition is in Nepal, where it's considered good luck for the birthday girl or boy to have brightly colored rice yogurt smeared on their forehead. There may be cake, there may be gifts, but colorful, delicious, and sticky yogurt? Almost always.

Interestingly, ancient Greeks also celebrated their gods' birthdays. And we're having their "leftovers" even today. The Greeks had a tradition where they would bake a special cake made of wheat, honey, olive oil, and cheese. It was sometimes made into a lunar shape to honor the goddess Artemis. In honor of her beauty, candles were put on the cake to make it glow.

#6

It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)

It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)

katmermaid Report

#7

Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs

Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs

It’ll be me, the guitar, and some tears tonight. Happy 20th to me!

dekusoup Report

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#8

Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised

Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised

Die_libtard Report

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#9

My Friend's 16th Birthday Was On 9/11

My Friend's 16th Birthday Was On 9/11

Righteous_Fire Report

Over time, the birthday cake spread throughout the world. It is often thought that China was the first to bake a cake for a child's first birthday, but it's probably the Germans who actually modernized this tradition in the 18th century and made it what we know today.

German cakes typically included candles, one for each year the person had lived plus one more for good luck that they would survive the next. The Germans were also the first to start making a wish when blowing out the candles.

#10

My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well

My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well

watskii Report

#11

Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday

Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday

SparkenSirius Report

#12

Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week

Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week

Peencub Report

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#13

Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home

Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home

Grykllx Report

#14

Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday

Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday

jonesnet Report

#15

Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room

Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room

GreenGzus Report

#16

It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)

It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)

CRRZ Report

#17

Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn't Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point

Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn't Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point

AnaChevez69 Report

#18

Someone Stole My Professor's Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today

Someone Stole My Professor's Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today

SansyBoy14 Report

#19

Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom's Birthday

Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom's Birthday

dreamboat252 Report

#20

How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today

How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today

CDC678 Report

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#21

When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday

When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday

dya37 Report

#22

Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen

Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen

tobito3 Report

#23

It's My Birthday. I'm In The Hospital And They Don't Know What's Wrong

It's My Birthday. I'm In The Hospital And They Don't Know What's Wrong

rusrslolwth Report

#24

Well, That's Annoying

Well, That's Annoying

Medicina Report

#25

Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me

Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me

DabDastic Report

#26

Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It's My Birthday

Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It's My Birthday

stairway_2evan Report

#27

My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home

My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home

Got back and somehow they ended up with a giant footprint in them.

nday79 Report

#28

Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake

Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake

MountainBear51 Report

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#29

Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me

Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me

DemonicFartbox Report

#30

My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And...

My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And...

XyroGame Report

#31

The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother

The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother

--TheLady0fTheLake-- Report

#32

This Was My Dad's Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday

This Was My Dad's Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday

Lpeck1 Report

#33

Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess

Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess

atomrameau Report

#34

Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I'll Have "Someone To Talk To"

Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I'll Have "Someone To Talk To"

but_im_not_a_pro Report

#35

My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd - Refused Refund

My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd - Refused Refund

She packed it in a cooler on ice & shipped via UPS for $350+ so it could be delivered the next day during my birthday party.

Shibbroni Report

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#36

I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday

I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday

melonpear Report

#37

One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk

One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk

Blind_Chauffer Report

#38

My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday

My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday

lennox98 Report

#39

Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake

Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake

skulpturlamm29 Report

#40

At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst

At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst

Oppapaerdna Report

#41

Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On

Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On

SargeantMasoff Report

#42

My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel

My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel

Heavenlygert Report

#43

Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself

Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself

mwise723 Report

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#44

Kid Spitting All Over The Cake

Kid Spitting All Over The Cake

Orangeknight464 Report

#45

I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored

I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored

heatherfeatherwan Report

#46

Social Distancing During My Birthday

Social Distancing During My Birthday

sgtsmith5018 Report

#47

My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn't Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven

My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn't Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven

tlynne127 Report

#48

Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It

Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It

gentlybeepingheart Report

#49

My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day

My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day

applebuddahh Report

#50

My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds

My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds

Grootdrew Report

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#51

The Delivery Note Got Put Inside The Card Instead Of A Birthday Message

The Delivery Note Got Put Inside The Card Instead Of A Birthday Message

aMac_UK Report

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#52

Birthday Balloons Caught On Rose Bush As I Brought Them In

Birthday Balloons Caught On Rose Bush As I Brought Them In

oldmanvegas Report

#53

My 30th Is On Wednesday, Bought Myself Some AirPods Today As An Early B-Day Present. Already Lost Them. Now I’m Paying £10 A Month For A Year For This Box. Happy Birthday Me

My 30th Is On Wednesday, Bought Myself Some AirPods Today As An Early B-Day Present. Already Lost Them. Now I’m Paying £10 A Month For A Year For This Box. Happy Birthday Me

King-JC Report

#54

My Birthday Cake Was Delivered

My Birthday Cake Was Delivered

PaleDuty3 Report

#55

For My 30th Birthday I Figured Out Ice Cream Cakes Melt In The Fridge

For My 30th Birthday I Figured Out Ice Cream Cakes Melt In The Fridge

Utopian_Pigeon Report

#56

My Birthday Is On World Toilet Day

My Birthday Is On World Toilet Day

Oopster_ Report

#57

2 Days Ago It Was 65 Degrees. Today Is My Birthday

2 Days Ago It Was 65 Degrees. Today Is My Birthday

whyitnowork09876 Report

#58

Spent All My Money On A Gold Bracelet For My 31st B-Day And Today I Look Down And It’s Gone. RIP

Spent All My Money On A Gold Bracelet For My 31st B-Day And Today I Look Down And It’s Gone. RIP

Skrods Report

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#59

20th B-Day Cake From My Parents

20th B-Day Cake From My Parents

UnlimitedChances Report

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#60

Got My Appendix Removed For My 20th Birthday

Got My Appendix Removed For My 20th Birthday

DaddyMerk Report

#61

Husband Thought His Boss Gave Him Money For His Birthday

Husband Thought His Boss Gave Him Money For His Birthday

domingming88 Report

#62

Found Out That I Had A Broken Bone In My Knee And Had To Have Surgery The Day Before My Birthday. Then Spend Most Of My Birthday In Hospital

Found Out That I Had A Broken Bone In My Knee And Had To Have Surgery The Day Before My Birthday. Then Spend Most Of My Birthday In Hospital

_Lu-ke Report

#63

Wanted To Bake Myself A Birthday Cake But Didn't Have The Right Ingredients. Decided To Wing It Anyways. I Present To You: Turd Cake

Wanted To Bake Myself A Birthday Cake But Didn't Have The Right Ingredients. Decided To Wing It Anyways. I Present To You: Turd Cake

birddp Report

#64

Sad Birthday To Me

Sad Birthday To Me

BoobaFatt13 Report

#65

Spent My Birthday At Home Today. Everything, Including The Cake, Was Meh

Spent My Birthday At Home Today. Everything, Including The Cake, Was Meh

SamKat8607 Report

#66

My Girlfriend Tried Making Pizza For Her Birthday

My Girlfriend Tried Making Pizza For Her Birthday

yellowspace Report

#67

I Wanted To Make A Cake For My Cake Day

I Wanted To Make A Cake For My Cake Day

Ab313r Report

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#68

Birthdays. Covid-19 Style

Birthdays. Covid-19 Style

80runs Report

#69

It's My 21st Birthday Today And My Birthday Gift This Morning Was Dropping My Phone On My Bedroom Floor

It's My 21st Birthday Today And My Birthday Gift This Morning Was Dropping My Phone On My Bedroom Floor

C0llaps Report

#70

Birthday Girl Left The Lid Off The Cake Box. The Dogs Thoroughly Enjoyed The Chocolate Bar Piñata Cake I Spend 2 Hours Making, No One Else Got A Crumb

Birthday Girl Left The Lid Off The Cake Box. The Dogs Thoroughly Enjoyed The Chocolate Bar Piñata Cake I Spend 2 Hours Making, No One Else Got A Crumb

Feltipfairy Report

#71

Closing In On My 30th Birthday, And Starting To Get That Good Ol' Santa Claus Beard

Closing In On My 30th Birthday, And Starting To Get That Good Ol' Santa Claus Beard

T_B_N_C Report

#72

Morning Coffee On My Birthday

Morning Coffee On My Birthday

xxulysses31xx Report

#73

Okay, Retrograde. I See You

Okay, Retrograde. I See You

chandellelavaun Report

#74

My Favorite Picture Of My Son. That Time We Went To His Lil Homie's Bday Party And He Ate All The Cake

My Favorite Picture Of My Son. That Time We Went To His Lil Homie's Bday Party And He Ate All The Cake

KingZolid187 Report

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