"Today is yours," we tell people on their birthday. "Enjoy it."
But sadly, nobody, not even Einstein, has owned that much time. If any. And in case we forget, the universe likes to remind us of that.
Bought 60 doughnuts for the office to celebrate? Too bad, you'll need to self-isolate and work from home. Baked yourself a cake? Oops, the floor ate it all.
So what do we do when we get the short end of the stick? The only thing there's left. Laugh. Here's an exclusive Bored Panda list of the most unfortunate birthdays. Enjoy!
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I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join
The Worst Birthday Card I've Ever Gotten
Birthday rituals are historical and universal events, which have been around since the prehistoric era. But in ancient history, only the privileged had birthdays; the "parties" were solely reserved for kings and nobility members.
Familiar birthday customs and symbols are currently seen among most cultures, however, some people have adopted unique traditions, characterized by their values and way of life.
For example, in ancient Japan, children often died young, so nowadays, in addition to their actual parties, they participate in the 7-5-3 celebration (Shichi-go-san), held on November 15. The name refers to the ages of the children celebrated: any child who reaches age three, boys who reach age five, and girls who reach age seven. They put on fine clothing and visit a religious shrine in thankfulness for their health.
My Kid During His Birthday Safari
Happy Birthday!
Thank You, Facebook
Another interesting tradition is in Nepal, where it's considered good luck for the birthday girl or boy to have brightly colored rice yogurt smeared on their forehead. There may be cake, there may be gifts, but colorful, delicious, and sticky yogurt? Almost always.
Interestingly, ancient Greeks also celebrated their gods' birthdays. And we're having their "leftovers" even today. The Greeks had a tradition where they would bake a special cake made of wheat, honey, olive oil, and cheese. It was sometimes made into a lunar shape to honor the goddess Artemis. In honor of her beauty, candles were put on the cake to make it glow.
It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)
Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs
It’ll be me, the guitar, and some tears tonight. Happy 20th to me!
Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised
My Friend's 16th Birthday Was On 9/11
Over time, the birthday cake spread throughout the world. It is often thought that China was the first to bake a cake for a child's first birthday, but it's probably the Germans who actually modernized this tradition in the 18th century and made it what we know today.
German cakes typically included candles, one for each year the person had lived plus one more for good luck that they would survive the next. The Germans were also the first to start making a wish when blowing out the candles.
My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well
Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday
Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week
Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home
Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday
Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room
It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)
Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn't Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point
Someone Stole My Professor's Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today
Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom's Birthday
How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today
When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday
Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen
It's My Birthday. I'm In The Hospital And They Don't Know What's Wrong
Well, That's Annoying
Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me
Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It's My Birthday
My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home
Got back and somehow they ended up with a giant footprint in them.
Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake
Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me
My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And...
The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother
This Was My Dad's Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday
Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess
Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I'll Have "Someone To Talk To"
My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd - Refused Refund
She packed it in a cooler on ice & shipped via UPS for $350+ so it could be delivered the next day during my birthday party.
I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday
One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk
My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday
Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake
At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst
Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On
My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel
Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself
Kid Spitting All Over The Cake
I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored
Social Distancing During My Birthday
My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn't Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven
Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It
My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day
More important question : who breaks into cars to steal valuables ? Answer : sons of bitches.
Load More Replies...Tip- hide your valuables somewhere where is not obvious like behind a car seat or behind grocery bags when you leave your car! :)
Better tip, NEVER leave anything worth more than $1 in your car. Thieves don't mind causing $1000 worth of damages to get to your $50 worth of groceries.
Load More Replies...Probably the same people who leave their wallet and keys in an unlocked car overnight. This happens at least once a week, according to the weekly paper's crime watch page.
That's sad but totally on the dumbass who left a $7000 camera in the car unattended.
What idiot leaves a 7k$ camera in a car? Stupid people deserve whatever preventable bad luck they get.
I had a fancy shopping bag out in plain view and someone busted the window to steal it. I was ticked off, but I got my revenge. There was just a fist size ball of raw clay in that bag. Bwahahaha
Ouch… we had something similar, two expensive backpacks stolen out of the car on the first day of a family vacation. At least ours was less expensive…
My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds
Aww! Happy birthday! Mine was exactly a week ago, and I thought I was Truman too ♡
Load More Replies...not my birthday but my 31st anniversary on Sept 1st and i get to spend it alone , at hospital , so i can finally be pain free after 20+ years , best anniversary gift i'll get
For a second, I thought you were going to say “ so I can finally be pain free after 31+ years” :)
Load More Replies...Since my poor friend doesn’t have a bp account, I’ll post this for her. Her parents have forgotten her birthday for the past 16 years (she’s 17). They’ve taken her twin sister out to restaurants, amusement parks, and whatnot every single one of these years,. And her parents say they don’t have a favorite child.
If they’re twins don’t they have the same birthday?
Load More Replies...Here are my 3 worst birthdays in order: 40th-Spent in hospital due to near fatal heart failure. 49th-Day 1 of Covid lockdown. Everything was closed. 50th- Self isolation due to some prick sending their Covid positive kids to school where my fiancée works. Looking forward to the end of the world and all life as we know it on my 60th!
My birthday is during spring break so I've never had a party of friends over because they were on vacation. After a certain age all 4 of my sisters vacationed instead of celebrating my birthday with me. When I turned 15 my parents stopped celebrating my birthday too because my birthday is the day after my step moms so they started leaving town too. I don't think I've celebrated a birthday in 10+ years.
I almost downvoted your comment because liking it is wrong... *hugs* to you.
Load More Replies...Worst birthday: milk had gone bad, got a whiff first thing in the morning and puked. Gave the whole day a sour note. Best birthday: parents extended our Disneyland trip by an extra day to celebrate. I was too young to keep track of dates so it blew my mind that I was a year older. Brain kept ricocheting between "I'm 7! I'm going to Disneyland! I'm 7! I'm going to Disneyland!"
It’s my 50th on Saturday. 6 months ago Australia was relatively COVID free, so I started organizing a big party. Of course we are in lockdown again, so party is cancelled. My eldest son is not even allowed to come and visit.
New Zealand’s delta outbreak was detected on my birthday, and I live in one of the epicentres. Then again, having a sensible covid response is a pretty sweet birthday present. Our cases in this outbreak decreased for the first time today, hopefully they’ll keep going down.
There will come a time when you want to forget about your birthday. That's when everyone else suddenly remembers. Trust me on this.
My 40th birthday, I wasn't looking forward to it anyway, then we got a call from the adoption agency we were working with. The birth-mother we'd talked to and who had told us she would be happy to place her baby with us had given birth. She changed her mind and was keeping the baby. It's something you know can happen and you prep for it but it still isn't easy. My husband was at work so I was dealing with this alone when the phone rang again. My father in law had passed (completely unexpected). The family was at the hospital where he'd been taken and were waiting for everyone to come and say good-bye. So we are standing in the hospital hallway and family members are walking by wishing me a happy birthday as we wait to for our turn (big family).
My great grandmother slipped into a coma on my last birthday and died two days later. That sucked. My best birthday was actually my 2020 birthday, when I got cards from friends and relatives all over the country.
I caught the flu from someone, at a New Year's Eve party. Spent the next few days in bed, including my birthday on January 4th ... in the hope that that evening I will be able to eat solid food again, for the first time. Something exciting like crackers and tea.
I spent my birthday in March 2020 in a 4hour line to get COVID tested before it was easily available. The girl in full hazmat suit asked for ID before she stuck the stick up My nose and poked my brain and noticed it was my birthday and said "Happy Birthday". That was my birthday highlight. Oh, yeah. It turned out to be Positive and almost died the next couple weeks
My mom had to hear on her Birthday that she had colon cancer last year. She went in for a coloscopy and we didn't think she'd get immediate result as the letter said exactly that. I was too busy with taking care of her with chemo and radiation to celebrate mine.
Well... Who cares? Didn't celebrate my birthday for several years. When I did, those invited would show up. Cause, they are my friends. REAL friends.
Birthdays are Highly overrated, just a way one crosses it every year, one crosses even death day but unfortunately it's one of the unforeseen part of our future.
Depends. Sometimes it's not really laughing at their pain, but relating to their pain and "misery-laughing" it off together. It's a coping mechanism, really.
Load More Replies...Aww! Happy birthday! Mine was exactly a week ago, and I thought I was Truman too ♡
Load More Replies...not my birthday but my 31st anniversary on Sept 1st and i get to spend it alone , at hospital , so i can finally be pain free after 20+ years , best anniversary gift i'll get
For a second, I thought you were going to say “ so I can finally be pain free after 31+ years” :)
Load More Replies...Since my poor friend doesn’t have a bp account, I’ll post this for her. Her parents have forgotten her birthday for the past 16 years (she’s 17). They’ve taken her twin sister out to restaurants, amusement parks, and whatnot every single one of these years,. And her parents say they don’t have a favorite child.
If they’re twins don’t they have the same birthday?
Load More Replies...Here are my 3 worst birthdays in order: 40th-Spent in hospital due to near fatal heart failure. 49th-Day 1 of Covid lockdown. Everything was closed. 50th- Self isolation due to some prick sending their Covid positive kids to school where my fiancée works. Looking forward to the end of the world and all life as we know it on my 60th!
My birthday is during spring break so I've never had a party of friends over because they were on vacation. After a certain age all 4 of my sisters vacationed instead of celebrating my birthday with me. When I turned 15 my parents stopped celebrating my birthday too because my birthday is the day after my step moms so they started leaving town too. I don't think I've celebrated a birthday in 10+ years.
I almost downvoted your comment because liking it is wrong... *hugs* to you.
Load More Replies...Worst birthday: milk had gone bad, got a whiff first thing in the morning and puked. Gave the whole day a sour note. Best birthday: parents extended our Disneyland trip by an extra day to celebrate. I was too young to keep track of dates so it blew my mind that I was a year older. Brain kept ricocheting between "I'm 7! I'm going to Disneyland! I'm 7! I'm going to Disneyland!"
It’s my 50th on Saturday. 6 months ago Australia was relatively COVID free, so I started organizing a big party. Of course we are in lockdown again, so party is cancelled. My eldest son is not even allowed to come and visit.
New Zealand’s delta outbreak was detected on my birthday, and I live in one of the epicentres. Then again, having a sensible covid response is a pretty sweet birthday present. Our cases in this outbreak decreased for the first time today, hopefully they’ll keep going down.
There will come a time when you want to forget about your birthday. That's when everyone else suddenly remembers. Trust me on this.
My 40th birthday, I wasn't looking forward to it anyway, then we got a call from the adoption agency we were working with. The birth-mother we'd talked to and who had told us she would be happy to place her baby with us had given birth. She changed her mind and was keeping the baby. It's something you know can happen and you prep for it but it still isn't easy. My husband was at work so I was dealing with this alone when the phone rang again. My father in law had passed (completely unexpected). The family was at the hospital where he'd been taken and were waiting for everyone to come and say good-bye. So we are standing in the hospital hallway and family members are walking by wishing me a happy birthday as we wait to for our turn (big family).
My great grandmother slipped into a coma on my last birthday and died two days later. That sucked. My best birthday was actually my 2020 birthday, when I got cards from friends and relatives all over the country.
I caught the flu from someone, at a New Year's Eve party. Spent the next few days in bed, including my birthday on January 4th ... in the hope that that evening I will be able to eat solid food again, for the first time. Something exciting like crackers and tea.
I spent my birthday in March 2020 in a 4hour line to get COVID tested before it was easily available. The girl in full hazmat suit asked for ID before she stuck the stick up My nose and poked my brain and noticed it was my birthday and said "Happy Birthday". That was my birthday highlight. Oh, yeah. It turned out to be Positive and almost died the next couple weeks
My mom had to hear on her Birthday that she had colon cancer last year. She went in for a coloscopy and we didn't think she'd get immediate result as the letter said exactly that. I was too busy with taking care of her with chemo and radiation to celebrate mine.
Well... Who cares? Didn't celebrate my birthday for several years. When I did, those invited would show up. Cause, they are my friends. REAL friends.
Birthdays are Highly overrated, just a way one crosses it every year, one crosses even death day but unfortunately it's one of the unforeseen part of our future.
Depends. Sometimes it's not really laughing at their pain, but relating to their pain and "misery-laughing" it off together. It's a coping mechanism, really.
Load More Replies...