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Husband Tries To Figure Out Why His Wife Is Pressuring Him To Take On More Chores, Tragedy Ensues
Life is unpredictable. Sometimes one wrong step or meeting the wrong people can influence it drastically and, unfortunately, not always for the better. Also, the hardest part is when you think that you know a person better than anybody else, just to find out things that you never could have imagined.
This Reddit user shared his story online that consisted of quite a few updates, starting with his wife’s friendship with a woman who he was sure was a bad influence on her. Then everything went downhill into learning about her odd habits, cheating and a terrible outcome.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Sometimes one wrong person can change not only our loved one, but every single thing around them too
Image credits: ELEVATE (not the actual photo)
This man shares that his wife got into a friendship with a woman who is a bad influence, but he never said anything until she pressured him to do more household chores
Image credits: u/throwaway970012390
The original poster (OP) starts his story by sharing that his wife is an angel but made friends with a woman who seems like a bad influence on her. He added that it didn’t affect him at first, until she suddenly started asking him to take on more household chores. He noted that she’s a stay-at-home mom and they already split chores and child care.
So after quite a few complaints from his wife that he doesn’t help at home, OP asked his boss to reduce his hours and took over everything at home. However, after a month of happiness at not needing to do anything, she started complaining about a lack of dates and wishes to get her nails done. Well, after explaining that he had to cut hours to take over the house chores followed suggestions to work more and ‘be a man.’
Community members backed up the man in this situation. “This sounds like you’re communicating and she’s not hearing it. Household labor needs to be divided fairly. It sounds like it was, except when you took over all of it,” one user wrote. “NTA but why are you with her? She seems to think you are just there to service her and do everything,” another questioned.
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
He noted that he found out his wife has been using substances, bringing them home and they had a huge conflict on the way to the rehab
Image credits: u/throwaway970012390
A few days later, OP posted an update sharing that he found out his wife was using substances. Numerous things have happened: he told their boys about the entire issue and forced her to message her supplier to end their friendship, which caused her to cry and scream for the entire ride to the treatment facility. She continued yelling that he was a controlling monster and so on.
OP noted that he couldn’t keep it together anymore and screamed back at her that she’s disgusting. That he wanted to leave her as she brought substances into their home, around him, a former addict, and their sons. OP noted that he doesn’t know what to do, he plans on speaking to the lawyer as it seems impossible to have a healthy relationship anymore.
Redditors shared their support with the OP. “Have hope that rehab will help. Many people are at their absolute worst on the way to rehab. Hopefully that is the case for her and she will have massive apologies when she’s done,” one user shared. “Some people need to know the truth no matter how harsh it is,” another added.
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
After a while, he learned that his wife was cheating on him and he felt worse than ever before
Image credits: u/throwaway970012390
Well, it looks like this took an unexpected turn. The OP posted an update sharing that his wife was cheating. He emphasized that his wife’s friend sent him videos with the caption: ‘in case you don’t realize you’re replaceable to her.’ OP vented about his feelings, stating he can’t handle it and even drank for the first time in the decade.
Redditors felt sorry for the man, especially those who have been following his story for a while now. “I have been following ur story for a while and i am terribly sorry brother , you tried ur best but some people just dont want to be helped and saved,” one user wrote. “I am so sorry, but this will pass and you and your boys WILL BE OK, believe me,” another emphasized.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
To everyone’s surprise, months later, the man shared an update that his wife had OD’d at her friend’s place and passed away
Image credits: u/throwaway970012390
Finally, after quite a few months, the OP made the last of his posts, sharing that his wife is dead. He said that they did therapy, she went back to rehab and was doing better and finally seemed happy. However, she had an OD’d and died at her friend’s house. He opened up about his feelings, sharing that he’s devastated.
In the end, OP pointed out to the community readers that if you have someone you love – cherish them. He emphasized that life is short and encouraged people to spend some time with their loved ones and let them know that you are here.
Redditors shared their honest support with the OP. “Man, I have never followed a Reddit account except yours. And I’ve never wished so strongly I could hug someone I’ve never met. I am so sorry,” one user shared. “Please, talk to a therapist or grief counselor to help you deal with all this. You did everything you could to help her, so please, don’t blame yourself,” another emphasized.
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
The man encouraged redditors to cherish their loved ones and be there for them
It’s obvious that dealing with the grief after losing your loved one is one of the hardest challenges that a person can face. Even if we know that loss is a normal part of life, shock and confusion can sometimes overpower us.
According to the American Psychological Association, if a person has social support and adopts healthy habits, most people may heal from loss on their own over time. Accepting a loss can take months or even a year.
Also, some people may experience prolonged sadness and find it difficult to go about their everyday lives. A psychologist or other qualified mental health practitioner with a grieving specialty may be of assistance to those experiencing severe or complex sorrow.
Now, probably most of us have found ourselves in the situation where we don’t know how to offer support to a grieving relative or a friend. We may be afraid to say something wrong and choose to say nothing which may make a person feel alone or isolated.
Better Health Channel listed suggestions on how you can help a person when their loved one passes away. Firstly, contact the grieving person as quickly as possible to offer your support. Additionally, if you can, go to the memorial or funeral service. They must understand that you value them enough to help them get through this trying time. And lastly: Ask them how they would like you to support them.
So, guys, this story had an unfortunate ending that shocked community members. Make sure to cherish your loved ones and remind them how much you love them.
What do you think ?
Cam 9 months ago
This is just... BEYOND anything that should be shared for online entertainment. This shouldn't have gone viral, if only there was a way to stop it from doing so. I can only hope all the attention doesn't make it worse on them. My heart is breaking for this man and his family.
Nichole Harris 9 months ago
I agree that this shouldn't be entertainment. But I'm glad that it went viral! If this post, as fully emotional and raw as it is if it reaches just one person..... Then I think OP would be happy
Load More Replies...
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 9 months ago
Im not convinced this is real.. it seems to click bait ish. So many key details are missing, behaviors dont line up, the story isnt as wild as some but all too convenient in so many places.
JK 9 months ago
Ive checked out OPs reddit profile, and I'm very convined this is, sadly, very very real. My heart breaks for this family. Addiction, of any kind, is absolutely vile and destructive, not just to the addict, but to everyone in their orbit. I have seen various addictions take hold of friends, family, and even my (now long time ago ex) husband (and each from different backgrounds). It isn't pretty, it's damned tragic, and the way OP writes, this is no work of imagination (there's a post missing from here where his wife even attempted suicide and he blamed himself).
Load More Replies...
BarkingSpider 9 months ago
This is a wild story with a lot if missing pieces. I'm glad the kids are in therapy, I hope he gets some too.
pasej41913@bustayes.com 9 months ago
Agreed, it seems like they missed parts of the original reddit thread when posting it here.
Load More Replies...
Mario Strada 9 months ago
Unless my cat walked on my keyboard, this post went from mundane house chores arguments, to severe addiction, to OD rather quickly. While I am at it, let me write a word of warning: when addicts go into detox, the period after they get out is the most dangerous. I know this from personal experience. Falling off the wagon is par for the course and it should be expected, but with the kind of drugs going around these days, specifically fentanyl, it's way too easy to OD. If you are the SO of someone addicted to opiates, and you care about that person, you need to be vigilant. The dose they were taking before rehab may not kill them outright, but illegal drugs have a way of shifting potency with time and changing sources. Of the people I knew that died by OD, every single one of them, with one notable exception, ODed with their first post-rehab fix. And that was when regular heroin was the only thing going around.
Zedrapazia 9 months ago
Wow, this went from a volcano to a nuclear explosion pretty fast. We can only hope it's not real, because if it is, I can only pity the OP and his kids. This is a s**t show nobody should ever get stuck in
Robin Roper 9 months ago
Maybe this shouldn't have been posted in a public forum, but clearly the OP felt he had no other forum/option. The reality is, this post may wake someone up. This post could allow a reader to see him or herself in the OP or the wife. This post could save a life. Addition and substance abuse will destroy the user and the people who care about the user. D***s are a parasite and will literally "suck the life" out of everyone involved. I know, each week, I write a letter to the now 25 year old who we became guardians for over 8 years ago - if I've counted correctly, he's in his 6th rehab. When the people who know him and us ask about how he is doing; today, my answer is, he's not dead - yet.
Melinda Flick 9 months ago
The Reddit story is all too possible. I had a neighbor who had a former husband. She had dumped him when she found out he was a heroin addict. He went to rehab multiple times. The last time, he got out on his birthday; met up with his friends, used and OD'd and those friends dumped his dead body on his girl friends doorstep. Not ding-dong-ditch, just dumped him for her to find the next time she opened her door. THEN, the the coroner called my neighbor in the middle of the night to come claim his body, although they were divorced and she had remarried. She was called because she was the mother of his only children... She had to refuse to pick up and claim his body so his aunt could do it, as his mother had recently died. She didn't find out the real cause of death for several weeks, because she was told he'd died in a car crash. She was nearly hysterical the next day, and I know it was hard on his kids, who were 10-ish when he died.
MsLou 9 months ago
I wish this didn't go viral for the sake of the sons. This isn't fair for them. I'm just shocked how it went to my wife does not want to do her SAHM share of chores to she's going to rehab. The piece missing in between is bothering me.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 9 months ago
As a former addict myself, it's sadly clear to me. OP's wife was probably already using drugs (or just starting to) when she started refusing to do her SAHM chores, because they likely interfered with her getting high/she couldn't do them while high. Your consciousness/thoughts are also VERY altered when on drugs, and depending on what you are asked to do, it can seem incredibly unreasonable, or seem like the person asking you to do it is harassing you. Drugs change how you perceive the world. They can make you lose sight of how much you value those you love, as getting high becomes your only goal. Being high becomes more important than anything and anyone else. It's a sad story and a common one. I was fortunate that I never hit rock bottom like OP's wife did, but I came close. I was hospitalized several times and I realized I was neglecting my cat, a helpless living thing that depended on me. I've been clean for 2+ years now.
Load More Replies...
Adrian Ward 9 months ago
Sounds like her "friend" killed her not intentionally but by hooking her on drugs then delaying getting an ambulance when the inevitable overdose happened. She was an addict that found someone else for her own fix by getting her to buy. Hope the police nail her for delaying medical treatment until it was too late.
Janet Graham 7 months ago
I am so sorry for what you and the boys are going through. You can honestly tell them that she loved them with all of her heart, but no one is perfect. I think she had been using d***s from day one with that worthless friend. I am also glad that you saw through the cobwebs before she passed. There are so many 'if only's in your future. Find a good support community and continue on your path of healing and sobriety. Prayers and Blessings!
carol bland 8 months ago
I've never understood why people make excuses for d**g addicts. Taking d***s is a choice. It's illegal. It's dangerous. It's expensive. It's potentially totally destructive. It's absolutely selfish. Stop accepting it!
me myself and i (She/Her) 8 months ago
oh god... oh god. I might cry. this is... heartbreaking is not enough to describe this.
Donteatme666 8 months ago
I've been there it's not fun thankfully I'm in the methadone program for the last 8 years and personally I don't give a f**k how you feel about methadone it helped me a lot and that's all that matters
Briards Are Best 9 months ago
Wow - just wow ....that was quite a read. Real or not? Who knows....
Dragons Exist 9 months ago
I couldn't care less if it was real, it was still a rollercoaster to read
Chelsea McKee 9 months ago (edited)
Not even willing to get a temporary part time job, huh. I mean if that's the life you want bud. Whelp, I just read the update.
Disgruntled Pelican 9 months ago
It must be so nice living a life where drugs, alcoholism, and tragedies simply don't exist.
Load More Replies...
Marnie 9 months ago
How can you say misandry is not a real thing? Of course it is. I had a friend who honestly disliked all men by default. That's plain sexism. Plenty of hateful people out there who group people up in various ways and pick and choose which groups to hate. This guy doesn't seem like an MRA guy. What makes you think that?
Load More Replies...
Cam 9 months ago
This is just... BEYOND anything that should be shared for online entertainment. This shouldn't have gone viral, if only there was a way to stop it from doing so. I can only hope all the attention doesn't make it worse on them. My heart is breaking for this man and his family.
Nichole Harris 9 months ago
I agree that this shouldn't be entertainment. But I'm glad that it went viral! If this post, as fully emotional and raw as it is if it reaches just one person..... Then I think OP would be happy
Load More Replies... Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 9 months ago
Im not convinced this is real.. it seems to click bait ish. So many key details are missing, behaviors dont line up, the story isnt as wild as some but all too convenient in so many places.
JK 9 months ago
Ive checked out OPs reddit profile, and I'm very convined this is, sadly, very very real. My heart breaks for this family. Addiction, of any kind, is absolutely vile and destructive, not just to the addict, but to everyone in their orbit. I have seen various addictions take hold of friends, family, and even my (now long time ago ex) husband (and each from different backgrounds). It isn't pretty, it's damned tragic, and the way OP writes, this is no work of imagination (there's a post missing from here where his wife even attempted suicide and he blamed himself).
Load More Replies... BarkingSpider 9 months ago
This is a wild story with a lot if missing pieces. I'm glad the kids are in therapy, I hope he gets some too.
pasej41913@bustayes.com 9 months ago
Agreed, it seems like they missed parts of the original reddit thread when posting it here.
Load More Replies... Mario Strada 9 months ago
Unless my cat walked on my keyboard, this post went from mundane house chores arguments, to severe addiction, to OD rather quickly. While I am at it, let me write a word of warning: when addicts go into detox, the period after they get out is the most dangerous. I know this from personal experience. Falling off the wagon is par for the course and it should be expected, but with the kind of drugs going around these days, specifically fentanyl, it's way too easy to OD. If you are the SO of someone addicted to opiates, and you care about that person, you need to be vigilant. The dose they were taking before rehab may not kill them outright, but illegal drugs have a way of shifting potency with time and changing sources. Of the people I knew that died by OD, every single one of them, with one notable exception, ODed with their first post-rehab fix. And that was when regular heroin was the only thing going around.
Zedrapazia 9 months ago
Wow, this went from a volcano to a nuclear explosion pretty fast. We can only hope it's not real, because if it is, I can only pity the OP and his kids. This is a s**t show nobody should ever get stuck in
Robin Roper 9 months ago
Maybe this shouldn't have been posted in a public forum, but clearly the OP felt he had no other forum/option. The reality is, this post may wake someone up. This post could allow a reader to see him or herself in the OP or the wife. This post could save a life. Addition and substance abuse will destroy the user and the people who care about the user. D***s are a parasite and will literally "suck the life" out of everyone involved. I know, each week, I write a letter to the now 25 year old who we became guardians for over 8 years ago - if I've counted correctly, he's in his 6th rehab. When the people who know him and us ask about how he is doing; today, my answer is, he's not dead - yet.
Melinda Flick 9 months ago
The Reddit story is all too possible. I had a neighbor who had a former husband. She had dumped him when she found out he was a heroin addict. He went to rehab multiple times. The last time, he got out on his birthday; met up with his friends, used and OD'd and those friends dumped his dead body on his girl friends doorstep. Not ding-dong-ditch, just dumped him for her to find the next time she opened her door. THEN, the the coroner called my neighbor in the middle of the night to come claim his body, although they were divorced and she had remarried. She was called because she was the mother of his only children... She had to refuse to pick up and claim his body so his aunt could do it, as his mother had recently died. She didn't find out the real cause of death for several weeks, because she was told he'd died in a car crash. She was nearly hysterical the next day, and I know it was hard on his kids, who were 10-ish when he died.
MsLou 9 months ago
I wish this didn't go viral for the sake of the sons. This isn't fair for them. I'm just shocked how it went to my wife does not want to do her SAHM share of chores to she's going to rehab. The piece missing in between is bothering me.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 9 months ago
As a former addict myself, it's sadly clear to me. OP's wife was probably already using drugs (or just starting to) when she started refusing to do her SAHM chores, because they likely interfered with her getting high/she couldn't do them while high. Your consciousness/thoughts are also VERY altered when on drugs, and depending on what you are asked to do, it can seem incredibly unreasonable, or seem like the person asking you to do it is harassing you. Drugs change how you perceive the world. They can make you lose sight of how much you value those you love, as getting high becomes your only goal. Being high becomes more important than anything and anyone else. It's a sad story and a common one. I was fortunate that I never hit rock bottom like OP's wife did, but I came close. I was hospitalized several times and I realized I was neglecting my cat, a helpless living thing that depended on me. I've been clean for 2+ years now.
Load More Replies... Adrian Ward 9 months ago
Sounds like her "friend" killed her not intentionally but by hooking her on drugs then delaying getting an ambulance when the inevitable overdose happened. She was an addict that found someone else for her own fix by getting her to buy. Hope the police nail her for delaying medical treatment until it was too late.
Janet Graham 7 months ago
I am so sorry for what you and the boys are going through. You can honestly tell them that she loved them with all of her heart, but no one is perfect. I think she had been using d***s from day one with that worthless friend. I am also glad that you saw through the cobwebs before she passed. There are so many 'if only's in your future. Find a good support community and continue on your path of healing and sobriety. Prayers and Blessings!
carol bland 8 months ago
I've never understood why people make excuses for d**g addicts. Taking d***s is a choice. It's illegal. It's dangerous. It's expensive. It's potentially totally destructive. It's absolutely selfish. Stop accepting it!
me myself and i (She/Her) 8 months ago
oh god... oh god. I might cry. this is... heartbreaking is not enough to describe this.
Donteatme666 8 months ago
I've been there it's not fun thankfully I'm in the methadone program for the last 8 years and personally I don't give a f**k how you feel about methadone it helped me a lot and that's all that matters
Briards Are Best 9 months ago
Wow - just wow ....that was quite a read. Real or not? Who knows....
Dragons Exist 9 months ago
I couldn't care less if it was real, it was still a rollercoaster to read
Chelsea McKee 9 months ago (edited)
Not even willing to get a temporary part time job, huh. I mean if that's the life you want bud. Whelp, I just read the update.
Disgruntled Pelican 9 months ago
It must be so nice living a life where drugs, alcoholism, and tragedies simply don't exist.
Load More Replies... Marnie 9 months ago
How can you say misandry is not a real thing? Of course it is. I had a friend who honestly disliked all men by default. That's plain sexism. Plenty of hateful people out there who group people up in various ways and pick and choose which groups to hate. This guy doesn't seem like an MRA guy. What makes you think that?
Load More Replies...
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