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16 Times Women Saw How Males Are Treated Differently First-Hand By Inventing A “Male Colleague”
To us guys, it may sound like something straight out of the '50s. But it's still a thing in 2021. Many working women are labeled as "bossy" or "impossible" at some point in their professional careers just because of their gender.
In response, a friend of writer Bess Kalb has created a workaround: she set up an email account under a fake man's name and assumes his persona, acting as her assistant whenever a sexist customer goes out of line.
Sadly, she isn't the only one. After Kalb tweeted about this, other women started sharing similar stories too.
Image credits: bessbell
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Creative Lynae Cook is one of the people whose tweets we included in the list. She does acting, photography, sings and plays drums in a band called breakfast tacos, and hosts a podcast. But even though Lynae has proved herself time and time again, she also needs an imaginary male to help her.
"I loop in my 'manager' every now and then, certainly a lot more frequently when there were live events going on, and especially when I've been reached out for influencer or brand partnership work," Cook told Bored Panda. "People are generally more respectful and less likely to ask for unpaid labor when a manager is involved."
By 'respectful' she doesn't just mean offering better compensation. "They will also send complete communications, rather than the piecemeal information often shared when they think are talking to 'just' an artist. For example, they might say, 'We're really interested in collaborating with you!' if it's just me, but when my 'manager' is looped in, they'll lay out the details surrounding the collaboration, what their ask is, deadlines, payment information, etc."
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According to Dr. Susan R. Madsen, a professor of Leadership & Ethics in the Woodbury School of Business at Utah Valley University and the Founding Director of the Utah Women & Leadership Project, the underlying objective of sexism toward women — whether conscious or not — is to maintain the current system of men having more power than women.
"Of course, some women may respond more positively to benevolent sexism, as it is perceived as kinder and more thoughtful. Yet research continues to find that it undermines and threatens women's influence and impact by just being 'in the air,'" Maden says. "In fact, societies that have the lowest levels of gender equality and female empowerment have the highest levels of both hostile and benevolent sexism. I expect this is the same for companies and organizations of all kinds."
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Nadine Bamberger 3 years ago
I bet she's bitchy and bossy while good old Cliff is strong and assertive and knows exactly what he wants.
Lynae Cook hopes that sexism will (slightly) diminish as time goes on, though she believes it probably will survive in undertones and be less overt than it has been.
"I wish people strived to do better and be better," Cook added. "It's a bit obscene that people are more respectful when others are watching, which tells me that morality is often performative. It's also a bit depressing. But I suppose that is also how many people are raised and what society tells us."
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Mystery Egg 3 years ago
Honestly, I have never come across this kind of behaviour where I live (Europe). The more I read about how American men are, the more I want to stay well away from them.
Today's working women experience gender discrimination in many forms. The Pew Research Center reported that about four-in-ten working women (42%) in the United States say they have faced discrimination on the job because of their gender.
The women described a broad array of personal experiences, ranging from earning less than their male counterparts for doing the same job to being passed over for important assignments.
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Zaza 3 years ago (edited)
Do you not have laws for this kind of stuff? We do. 14 days after sending the invoice the company will send a reminder, another one 2 weeks after that (usually accompanied by a fine). After 3 reminders they are allowed send it to a collection agency and every company in the coutry does this. Cost of hiring the collection company falls on the client who neglected to pay in time. Not paying for stuff gets taken extremely seriously over here. Collection agencies will take the matter to court, the judge will rule in favour of whomever sent the bill and then they just come to your house to confiscate your belonings. Yes pretty much all of it except your regular clothes (high end stuff will be taken), 1 single chair and a bed for every person living at the premises and some cups, plates and silverware. Got a housemate who has stuff there? Tough luck, will be claimed. Expensive breed pets sometimes get taken too (unless you can prove that you never bred them). Cost of police accompanying them, the locksmith, the movers, storing, sorting and auctioning off the stuff etc falls on the client. Whatever the stuff was worth will be taken off the bill, but often hardly makes a difference since so much costs are added. Whatever is left of the bill still needs to be paid. They will claim whatever amount in legal from your salary (employers are obligated by law to cooperate) and somethimes even freeze all your bank accounts and take whatever you have in them
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Scagsy 3 years ago
My father-in-law runs a steel fabrication business and never gets paid on time. My wife has significantly more success in ensuring invoices are paid when she volunteers for a day now and then. Anecdotally, this may be true but if studied, I am sure the numbers would be pretty close between men and women. In my experience, it takes a certain type of person to chase payments, regardless of sex.
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not your average weirdo 3 years ago
It's honestly really sad that you would have to be male to be taken seriously.
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What do you think ?
Brendan 3 years ago
Slightly off topic, but my friend is half-Indian. When he used to apply for solicitor jobs, he would use his birth-given name (Anil), but rarely got a response. He then applied for jobs using a white-sounding name (Andy), and got invited to an interview every time. It's so sad.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Try going to medical school. Old white dudes dominant in profession, and their bias is evident in how they teach, what they teach, how they score exams, etc. It may be better now than my day, but that's not saying much, given we gals had to cover up from chin to toes, never meet hteir eye, etc., if we wanted to avoid the Grope For Grades routine. And when I answer the phone, in 2021, "Yes, I am head of the household," the shock of the caller is real. I've had males argue I *can't* be. Well, yes, I can. It's called "I picked up the phone, so I'm the head of the household for this phone call". If Hubby picked up, he is. We call it... wait for it... *partnership in marriage*!
Dietmar Pichler 3 years ago
Besides it is "Remington Steele" all over again, I had the same thoughts and IF I ever run my own business, there will be a "boss" I would have to talk too. This idea works for everyone :) (gender does ot matter)
Monday 3 years ago
Hell yes. Give me an invisible boss to "ask" or "confirm with".
Load More Replies... Brendan 3 years ago
Slightly off topic, but my friend is half-Indian. When he used to apply for solicitor jobs, he would use his birth-given name (Anil), but rarely got a response. He then applied for jobs using a white-sounding name (Andy), and got invited to an interview every time. It's so sad.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Try going to medical school. Old white dudes dominant in profession, and their bias is evident in how they teach, what they teach, how they score exams, etc. It may be better now than my day, but that's not saying much, given we gals had to cover up from chin to toes, never meet hteir eye, etc., if we wanted to avoid the Grope For Grades routine. And when I answer the phone, in 2021, "Yes, I am head of the household," the shock of the caller is real. I've had males argue I *can't* be. Well, yes, I can. It's called "I picked up the phone, so I'm the head of the household for this phone call". If Hubby picked up, he is. We call it... wait for it... *partnership in marriage*!
Dietmar Pichler 3 years ago
Besides it is "Remington Steele" all over again, I had the same thoughts and IF I ever run my own business, there will be a "boss" I would have to talk too. This idea works for everyone :) (gender does ot matter)
Monday 3 years ago
Hell yes. Give me an invisible boss to "ask" or "confirm with".
Load More Replies...
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