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50 Women Who Called Out Sexist Things That Are Still Blatantly Accepted
Interview
When faced with injustice, you generally have three ways how you can react. You can ignore it, keep your head down, and get on with your day without making any waves. You can try to be sneaky and make subtle 5D chess moves to outplay the situation to your own advantage. Or you can call the injustice out and shine a light on it for everyone to see, bold as brass, sometimes using humor to do it. That way, it’s harder to hide the injustice.
This list is about the times that women and men called out sexism and misogyny, as shared on the r/TrollXChromosomes subreddit. People from all walks of life, from everyday employees and parents to skilled professionals, confronted sexism on social media head-on to help everyone. Upvote the responses by these brave people that you agree with and let us know what you think in the comment section below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
With Pleasure, Julianne
RELATED:
#2
Too Many Of Us Have An Uncle Randy
The r/TrollXChromosomes will be celebrating its 10th birthday on the last day of March. "We're currently in the middle of intensive planning for the 10th Cakeday celebrations. It'll be so much better than our 5th Cakeday shindig, folks will cry. But we can't tell you more than that, lest our plans are foiled," the moderators told Bored Panda when we reached out to them.
They’re also steadily moving toward the 1 million member mark. Currently, they’re at just over 802k, so consider joining them and giving them a boost. They post about a variety of topics. In their words, they’re a subreddit for “rage comics and other memes with a girly slant.”
However, this doesn’t change the fact that the subreddit is also home to some serious posts that show how deeply sexism is enrooted in our society. Even to this very day. And while sexism can be subtle and covert, it can also be very overt. One example of this is women getting harassed on the streets. So while it’s one thing to confront sexism online, it’s a whole other ball game when it’s done in real life.
#4
Just Going To Leave This One Here
#5
This Hurts Deep Because It’s True
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Agree. But they don’t actually respect that man. They just say “but he don’t mind if you have friends, right?” “I have a boyfriend” really only works because some men think it’s the only possible way THEY could be rejected when mama said they were so handsome!
#6
I’ve Never Heard This Explained So Succinctly (Credit Fu**k_patriarchy On Instagram)
Bored Panda spoke about how women should respond if they’re ever in a situation where they’re either being catcalled or openly harassed on the street with Emily May, the co-founder and the executive director of ‘Hollaback!’ The organization aims to end harassment in all of its forms.
May explained that women should always trust their instincts. “Listen to what your gut is telling you. There is no ‘right’ or ‘perfect’ response to harassment; however, studies show that having some kind of response (either in the moment or later) can reduce the trauma associated with harassment. If you decide to respond, do it for you.”
She said that it’s always all right to do nothing, smile, and keep walking. It’s always up to you to decide what’s right for you and if you want to confront your harassers. It’s always harder to do this in-person than behind the safety of your screen.
#7
Yuuuuup
#9
As An Extremely Gay Lady, I’d Like To Co-Sign The F**k Out Of This
Andy Acceber 3 years ago
For those saying "not all men," that also proves the point. It was never the clothes. Still, people continue to blame women for dressing "provocatively."
As May put it in an interview with Bored Panda, your safety is the main priority. However, if you feel safe and choose to respond to your harassers, there are three main approaches that you can take: setting boundaries, engaging bystanders, and documenting the situation. Let’s go into detail about each approach.
“Set the Boundary. Tell the person harassing you exactly what you want them to do and why. Look them in the eye and denounce their behavior with a strong, clear voice. Many people prefer to name the behavior. For example, you can say, ‘Do not [what they’re doing], that’s harassment.’ You can also simply say ‘that is not okay’ or ‘don’t speak to me like that.’ Say what feels natural to you,” May from ‘Hollaback!’ explained.
#10
Good Lesson
Agatz 3 years ago
My friend told me she was so happy she is turning 40, because finally people have stopped with the baby questions, because now they think maybe she does not have kids because she is too old. And now she does not have do defend herself for not having kids. Jeez, why can't people just back off? Like, do people ask a women questions like that because they think they forgot to have kids and they need to be reminded?
Rosie Hamilton 3 years ago
Apparently you just get asked 'why didn't you'. The question changes subtly but never goes away. I would hear my childfree relatives talk about it.
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François Carré 3 years ago
I still don't get this idea of women's womb being public property, and literally everyone being entitled to feel concerned (and to comment) about the way it is used or not.
Catlady6000 3 years ago
You don't even have to be child free, just have only one. Had to put up with people actually lecturing me on the necessity of a sibling for my daughter. Friends, coworkers, the flipping checker at the local Dollar General. It's hell in a small town, everyone is in your business and knows better than you
Juririn 3 years ago
Hear, hear, same crap with me. Got scolded that my son will grow up spoiled and selfish as an only child 😡
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Teresa Taylor 3 years ago
I’m 55, straight, never married and no kids. Some people assumed I was gay and that’s why I didn’t marry. Uh, no, but nothing wrong with being gay. Then it was other excuses for me. Now, when those same friends post their kid or finances complaints, I comment with, “See, you shoulda had dogs instead. It’s not illegal to put them in a crate when they annoy you. It’s not illegal to euthanize them when they get sick.” (Before you spaz out, my dogs SLEEP in their crates. They are not used for punishment. Second, I just dropped $1476.63 on cancer surgery for one of my dogs.And THAT was the discounted “member” price at Banfield Pet Hospital. Boxers are prone to mast cell tumors. This was her third go round and four masses were removed.)
Karen Grace 3 years ago
I hope she's doing ok now. Some people just don't understand that for some of us our furkids Are family! I'm a mom, grandma and great-grandmother but my cats are still my family.
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Ula 3 years ago
35, sharing I would like to have a dog. Comment: you only think you want a dog, but actually you want a baby!
Zedrapazia 3 years ago
My partner and I have 5 dogs and 3 cats. What's the comment I hear about them the most? "yOu JuSt GoT sO mAnY pEtS bEcAuSe YoU wAnT tO cOmPeNsAtE tHaT yOu HaVe No KiDs." Like, I never liked babies or children in my life ever, not even when I was at the same age, and I can't even sit in the same room with a baby or toddler workout getting nervous because I get mad when they start screaming. Everybody knows I can't stand children, but they keep on asking, or even trying to give me their baby to hold it (like if this would change anything for me). It's awful. Let the people have kids that want to have kids, but leave me in peace with my dogs and cats.
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Dillon Hughes 3 years ago
I totally agree with agatz. Though I am a man and asked the same question. Maybe my nuts don't work or my lady and I had a miscarriage. Just tell them, yes I have X children born, and just gave them a partial birth abortion! See that reaction! Ha! (Not funny but you get it)
CharlMarx 3 years ago
It's even bad when you have 1 kid. People won't stop bugging you asking when you're going to have another one. Like maybe I just want 1 kid, maybe I can't have more, maybe I can't financially afford another one, maybe I'm just enjoying time with my kid before I have another one later down the line. Stop.Asking.Woman.When.They're.Going.To.Have.(More).Kids
Pamela24 3 years ago
I've just turned 26 and my father has been asking me about having children literally every time we see each other (which isn't that often nowadays but still...). In the beginning (like 2 years ago) it was mainly in a joke kind of way and he's getting more and more persistent, clear and less like it's fun. I know I should put him in his place but it honestly isn't that easy.
Hutt'nKloas 3 years ago
Got the same bloody question from my dad at age 47, seemingly afraid the bloodline would die out..............well so be it! My & my wifes choice only.
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Black Karen 3 years ago
I almost died having kids and ppl who know this still ask when I'm having more.
Ozacoter 3 years ago
For a lot of people our ability to breed is more important that our value as a person. So they are fine with us dying as soon as we reproduce.
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Logically Reasonable 3 years ago
Isn't that sexist to be commenting that women NEED to have kids? Not all women are the types to be able to handle kids, like not all men are the types to be able to handle having a family. The most detrimental thing you can do to a girl/woman, is trying to control her emotional state on having kids. I think that's equivalent to forced blunt trauma.
Mascha Claessens 3 years ago
Djezes, I'm sorry for this lady... but also without the miscarriages, you shouldn't have to defend yourself for not having children. Man or woman.
Christine M Quigley 3 years ago
Why do people assume it's their business to know? My daughter is 40 and CAN"T have children. But my son's MIL felt it was her business to interrogate her on why she was childless.
Arctic Fox Lover 3 years ago
My mom has 4 children and is looked down upon for having so many kids. Make your mind, people!!
Isabella 3 years ago
Let's be honest, this question is coming more from women, especially from the "female" side of a family. :))))
Daria B 3 years ago
To be honest, my grandma (may she rest in peace) and my mother-in-law, both asked me this question, but I didn't mind, I didn't take it that way. When it's family, unless they're needlessly persistent (which, thankfully is not my case), it's natural and it's okay to be curious. You may be welcoming a new family member someday, you may never, and it's all okay. Also, they both asked me nicely and weren't being jerks about it. What does get on my nerves is when total strangers get into your privacy just like that and get all self-righteous about the topic. Now, that happened too, and it was shocking, and if it ever happens again, I'll tell them they're scaring me. Why would anyone take so much interest in my uterus if not to sell it to the black market?
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Xitlali Alvarez 3 years ago
I hate it when people say when are you gonna have kids. my mother has had two miscarriages. when people ask that it seems wrong because you don't know if they even can have kids.
Farzana Essop 3 years ago
I tell people that I have trouble conceiving coz the just can't understand why a woman DOES NOT want kids😢
D. Pitbull 3 years ago
Aaaand it's not your place to pretty much order or guilt someone into doing something just because you think "that's the way it should be". "Time to get on that"... seriously? Was there some human shortage I didn't know about - are we all mandated to have children now because the human race is on the brink of extinction?
Janina Lebeda 3 years ago
Yeah, like what until you have a second child. Yeah, I was pregnant 3 times. And suddenly they don't have anything to say anymore.
Ozacoter 3 years ago
The only way that I would get my MIL to stop pestering me about having children is to tell her that I am infertile due to my diseases. Then she got all uncomfortabl e and never asked again. She is super nice most of the time but she really wouldnt let this go. We dont want kids acept it.
LeilaOdinis 3 years ago
I knew early on that I couldn't have kids. When asked I would reply "I havent found the right Dad," seemed to shut the question down. "Or when was your last prostate exam," helps.
Kathy Vivona 3 years ago
YESSS< my MIL, used to ask us this all the time....I finally said we have been trying for 3 years, and your insensitive comments aren't going to make us conceive any faster.
Eglė Bukauskaitė 3 years ago
I was asked this question by a random small girl who stuck to me when i was swimming O.o
Zedrapazia 3 years ago
Stop polluting the world with more humans, it's already too many of them
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GaeFrog 3 years ago
I hope you stub your toe and your charger only works at an angle so your phone never actually changes when you "plug" it in at night
Load More Replies... InvincibleRodent 3 years ago (edited)
You'd be surprised how many people think it's perfectly okay to say these things to the childfree, especially to women.
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#11
Where’s The Lie
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
It isn’t logical, it’s sexist and ageist and pro forced birth, and by nature illogical.
#12
Funny How Rarely This Comes Up With Christians
“The important thing is that you aren’t apologetic in your response, and that you don’t engage with them after you set the boundary. Oftentimes, people who harass may try to argue with you or dismiss you through further conversation or by making fun of you. As tempting as it may be to get into a verbal war with them, we don’t recommend it. The attention may further feed their abusive behavior and cause the situation to escalate. Once you’ve said your piece, keep it moving.”
The second approach is engaging bystanders by telling them what’s going on and what they can do to help you. “Not all bystanders have been trained to respond, but typically people do understand that street harassment is not okay and they want to help you, so what can you do to ask for that help? You will need to loudly announce to people around you what the harasser just said or did and identify them, like: ‘That man in the red shirt is following me. I need help!’” May explained.
#13
I Want To Meet This Heroic Mystery Woman
Missy Moo Moo 3 years ago
Absolutely!! We don't even wear makeup or paint our nails to impress men. If there were no men in the world we would look exactly like we do now - but wear much less clothes....
#15
Be A Proud Spinster !
She continued: “Then tell people what you want them to do, like, ‘Can you wait here with me? Can you call the police?’ Remember that it is okay to ask for help, it does not mean that you are weak, in fact, it means that you are strong because you’re acknowledging that street harassment, in fact, hurts.”
#16
The Only Way To Get Republicans To Care About Black Lives
George-Florin Constantin 3 years ago
So many issues approached in just a dozen words. Clever girl.
#17
The List Could Go On And On...
Truth Monster 3 years ago
Try it with race too. "First White Astronaut", "First White President."
#18
They Should Both Be Free
The third and final approach is documenting the situation. If you feel that you’re safe and not currently in danger, you can consider taking a picture or a video of your experience. Or you can ask a bystander to do so.
“This could include the person harassing you, their license plate, or the scene. Some people use photos or videos to report an incident—for example, if the person was at work when this happened people may choose to report it to their employer.”
#19
Women Are Not Free Therapy
#20
This Is So Accurate
#21
This Tweet Hits Hard
May detailed: “Others use it to share their story on social media or anonymously through ihollaback.org. Many find it to be empowering to turn the lens off of them and onto the person harassing them. It often has the potential to be hugely transformative. If it feels right to you then do it. It doesn’t work that way for everyone so ask yourself, ‘Does it feel right for me?’ or ‘Is there another way to respond?’”
According to May, there is no such thing as a ‘perfect’ response to harassment: “There is no such thing as a perfect response, this is not your fault, and you are not alone. Take the time to recover and employ strategies for taking care of yourself.”
#22
I Swear, The Audacity
#23
Someone Said It!!!
#24
This Is What We Want. Not The Future, Now
One thing that you can do is to develop a ‘quick ritual’ to help you ‘shake off’ what happened every time that you get harassed. Having a friend that you contact when this occurs can also help. Sharing your story with the people you trust can be very powerful and healing. What’s more, affirming to yourself that you deserve better and that you won’t let ‘the haters’ get you down is another response.
“The idea here is that you want you to develop resilience so that you can get out there and keep being you in the world,” May told Bored Panda.
#25
So Basically
Andy Acceber 3 years ago
The only appropriate response to this is "Yes." If they're unaware enough to ask it, that's the answer they deserve
#26
Let Her Name Be Known
#27
Invasive, Huh?
#28
My Boyfriend Didn’t Appreciate This One As Much As I Did
#29
Success Is The Best Revenge
Mohsie Supposie 3 years ago
Absolutely nothing wrong with braids. It's your hair... do with it what you want! Braids look great on her!
#30
Unfortunately True
I’m a fan of poet Dylan Thomas’ lines: “Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.” While the context is important, you can interpret the words to mean that you should fight for what’s right instead of giving in to the pressure placed on you to stay quiet. Just remember that your safety is paramount: online and IRL.
#31
F**k The Patriarchy
#32
Truth
#33
Mansplaining Fail
#34
It Never F**king Ends
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Wow, they cry you didn’t like sports? I figured it would be a relief to many men who don’t like the pressure of having to enjoy sports when they don’t. I’ve never dated a guy who seriously cares about sports. That’s so cringe and middle America basic.
#35
K. 3 years ago (edited)
I look forward to my periods (kind of). I am either in a near death state of being, or I push myself at the gym to get through the things I hate at the same time. (Exercise is good for you. I can have a hate/love relationship with it.) EDIT: I have passed out, vomited, and were sent to the hospital from pms pains. For some odd reason, I push myself even more during “let the gates of hell open” week. I still got three tubs of ice cream.
#36
"Women R So Emotional"
#37
Yep
#38
And The Sinister Version, "If She Has Boobs, She's Biologically Ready For Sex"
#39
Bless The Boys
Andy Acceber 3 years ago
Unless you're careful, boys are taught to believe their feelings are logic. Girls are gaslit to believe their logic are feelings.
#40
So True
#41
Girls Are Always Taught How To Stay Safe, It's Not As Common To Teach Boys To Not Create Unsafe Situations
#43
F**king Truth
#44
Yes, Just Like That
#45
Misogyny Running Deep
Something 3 years ago
Even in this 19th century arrangement, the women did not/do not live "for free". Women have been working (outside the home) throughout history, and there was a time that the husband legally owned all their earnings. And in addition, women in a "traditional" arrangement are usually expected to do all the cooking, cleaning, childcare (where applicable), and miscellaneous housework.
#46
This Explains A Whole F**king Lot, Actually
#47
Unconstitutionality
Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago
She is right, you cannot be prosecuted by a state for something you did in another state, as its law did not apply on you when you did it.
#48
I Don't Know Why This Made Me Laugh So Hard
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Planned Parenthood caught my grandma's cervical cancer. She was over 60. She could afford the GYN there. The end. PP wins.
Add New Image
What do you think ?
MadDawg 3 years ago
for the men who feel attacked or sad in the comments, I feel attacked and sad when I, a thirteen-year-old girl, get catcalled for wearing leggings or dress coded for "distracting the boys from their education by wearing a tank top in 100-degree weather". This society is so inherently sexist and when you say that people speaking out about their experiences is hurting your feelings, perhaps you are the issue.
RoseTheMad 3 years ago
Heres one of the big ones: If a woman has a lot of sex, she's a sl*t or a wh*re, if a man has a lot of sex he's a "legend" a "proper lad" etc...
Si 3 years ago
And once labelled , a woman is fair game for sexual violence
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KombatBunni 3 years ago
Today I was treated to two instances of being talked down to because of my gender and I was mega p*ssed. Where did this happen? In the two hobby shops here in Melbourne CBD, Victoria Australia.How did this happen? Because I dared to go in and ask got something I needed but apparently these men knew more about what I needed than I did, even after I already told them both I knew exactly what I was after and what it was for. They’re both lucky I was able to keep my temper and not give them both a fkn black eye. Female staff member just looked the other way and my bf just stood there and did nothing :( I’m sick of being treated like an idiot just because I’m female 😡
Bex Hallihan 3 years ago
I have a pretty masculine hobby, I ride motorbikes. We are ALL so over being chopsed at by men who often know less about the engine than we do. I know fuckall about engines, and even I can tell some things are wrong. I told a recovery control that my bike tyre couldn't be repaired at the roadside. He said, oh I'm sure it can, just sit tight and the truck will be along soon". Truck arrives, and lo! My bike tyre is unrepairable roadside... whats that, you'll have to despatch another truck to remove the bike to the shop? The drivers were fine, but equally pissed off.
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Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago (edited)
A lot of dìcks are about to be in a twist over this one.
M 3 years ago
Dudes in comments be like: "Oh I felt super uncomfortable reading this article. Why are you posting stuff like this ?Boo #notallmen". Bro, if you felt uncomfortable reading about this s**t in an article think about how it feels for the women that have to experience this kind of crap themselves, in real life, all the goddammed time. Hint: it's quite a bit worse than uncomfortable. Bonus: implying that the reason why you are an unempathetic, whiny, sexist amoeba is because all the "woke" people are so aggressive and rude to you about this topic is pretty f*****g pathetic
Diane Knight 3 years ago
The men who are heroes are the ones who have leaped up when they see or hear a waitress respond to a guy who just groped her, and take that pos out of his chair and grab him between his legs. Only then does a guy truly understand how it is for a woman to be groped by a man?
Load More Replies... Iggy 3 years ago
The level of anger this article has generated saddens me. We still have so far to go. Acknowledging there's a problem is the first step in resolving it. It does not mean anyone here has been personally accused. As for the 'what-about'-ers, it's not a competition.
Aliquid A 3 years ago
I just went through the list and 88% of the posts were about a specific guy "this guy said this to me", or about a specific type of guy "men who say ___ are jerks". Yet people are crying in the comments here "Why are they blaming all men? I didn't do anything? You are so mean!!". They DIDN'T blame all men. You clearly need to work on your reading comprehension skills.
BleepBloop73 2 years ago
hello i am from the future. (This is still an issue in 2022)
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Javiera Gotelli 3 years ago
I feel sad for women who put up with this crap. Even more so, for the ones who married assholes and assumed they would change over time...
Sleepyhead 3 years ago
It’s articles like these that remind me that learning more about women’s issues is a continuous process because these are continuous problems. Thank you everyone for sharing, it’s helpful to see discussion.
BoredRaccoon 3 years ago
The amount of angry comments speak for themselves. I don’t remember the women of bored panda being this pressed when there was a post addressing how toxic masculinity harms men.
Myrkur 3 years ago
One thing that pisses me off most about `pro-life` is that they really think that a some growing cells have more rights and need more protection then a whole living human being. And as soon as a baby is born when someone couldn't get an abortion those same people are nowhere to be found
Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago
Maybe you don't understand that, so I will make it clear for you : murder is wrong.
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Evo Laurel 3 years ago (edited)
I was a competitive figure skater during high school, and my gym teacher refused to let me do any of the 'strong' exercises (ie using any weights over 5IBS) because I was a girl. My best friend at the time would always trade w/ me after the teacher forced me to only use the light ones b/c he wasn't able to use the 15IBS, but I could (in situps and the like). Also going to college and being told that women should stay at home to fix the house up nice and have dinner ready when the man walks into the door, and shouldn't be in classes learning how to fix cars. The high school also refused to let the girls wear jeans and tshirts, only long dresses, polos and either skirts or dress pants. The boys usually wore tshirts and jeans.
marianne eliza 3 years ago
#1: me, 7 years old: Mom? When I sit on pop-pop's lap, he touches me down there. Mom: Then don't sit on his lap! me: to my 7 year old self; if it happens again, it's my fault. It did. Many, many times. Until I was 15. Sadly, he was widowed and lived with us, his only daughter's family cause he couldn't live with his sons as they would clash like roosters.
Nora AlMeida 3 years ago
It’s insane that, that sick lowlife of a so-called, ‘grandfather’ did that to you— it’s also insane that your mother and any other person didn’t call the police on him to throw him in prison.
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Harry Potter 3 years ago
I was listening Willow Smith "21st Century Girl" while reading this and it saddened me and the word on her shirt said "Boys need to learn" or something. True they do *I am 2 lazy 2 go back nd check *
WiTchY_WoMaN 3 years ago
Articles like this make me sick.. I had to stop reading. It's always an endless circle of arguments... Screen devices have made it so much easier for people to say offensive things to one another. Disgusting..
matthew owen 3 years ago
I feel a lot of these things are only in America, but can any women tell me if I'm right?
Lauren Caswell 3 years ago
No this is everywhere. I'm in nz and there is a super toxic culture for women and for men
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Christian Storms 3 years ago (edited)
This scratches my nerves very uncomfortably. I am male. I might have done some of these things. Don't get me wrong, I am in control of my libido as much as I am in control of my aggressions or possessive impulses - I don't steal, I don't hit, I don't molest, let alone rape. But I do have impulses. I do have the impulse to take what isn't mine, to assault who did me wrong, to... again take what is not mine. I think we all have, but I hope from sentient beings that we can and will control them. But this sad experiences of so many girls and women tell different stories. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to react. Ignoring what I have been taught as gallantery - open doors, taking the heavy lifting, treating ladies like fragile, delicate beings - strikes me as rude behaviour, but doing so is subliminal sexist. Offering company or having an eye over the drinks of girls or butting in in a quarrel, I just end up looking like the next offender waiting in line...
Christian Storms 3 years ago (edited)
Reading this again, it sounds like the "it's not me" whine you're so rightfully sick off. Sorry. What can I, as an individual male, do - other than not being that guy and making sure my sons won't be, either? Of course I should step in where I see missing consent. But: a) I once got mobbed by a bunch of sickos because "their girl" was polite to me and I was polite to her. We're talking about holding the door and thanks... So please don't assume that every man in your vicinity has the balls to jump in like superman but just doesn't care. Those of us who do care don't have the balls to jump in, because we are the ones that get mauled by those sexist macho sickos, too. b) more than once I got berated by the girl since obviously I disturbed their crude mating ritual where she wants to be stalked after her first 3 "No!"s. She wants no softy gay limp noodle but a real man who can take her like he pleases... like what the hell, girl?! Ill try to be a better person, to help where Im welcome.
Load More Replies... Sofia Herrera 3 years ago
My parents tell me to wear pants when my dad's friend cones over, I was wearing a hoodie and jeans, he stared me up and down like a piece of meat, his wife was right there, my mom stepped in for me but my dad didn't do anything. Please teach your boys respect so they don't grow up to put other girls in my situation, which is nothing compared to what others go through
Mette Stenersen 3 years ago
The U.S. is really heading in the wrong direction. How is it possible in this day and age to ban abortions? I'm glad I live in Norway, it seems there are a lot more issues between genders than where I live.
Bee Jairrels 3 years ago
I know im going to get downvoted to hell for this but some the post is toxic and rude. Abuse does apply to everyone. I know abuse can occur but it does happen to everyone.
Rannveig Ess 3 years ago
Still wondering why BP insists on posting articles that do nothing but incite people to name call, half the comments are hidden because they're rude, obnoxious and mean, lots of the usual America Bashing, lots of down votes for anyone who politely and intelligently doesn't post with the accepted mindset of the other BP members, lots of misinformation and the usual division into "you" them" Republicans" Americans" you're ignorant" garbage as "comments". Of all the laughing and crying I've done on this site today, it all slams to a halt and I leave because I just don't see a reason to choose and feature articles that are just going to upset people and bring out the trolls or hit a nerve. There's so much out there so why fish around on Reddit and Twitter and IG and FB for the most dividing stories out there? This site is so much fun when it's interesting and based on the smart, friendly, educating commonalities of us all. Why throw a bomb in all the time and blow things up, BP?
Cian Thomas McHugh 3 years ago
Found this poem on Reddit that I think applies here. Credit to u/Poetry_duderino for it. "Why is it that when she says it, it's all right? Why is it that when I mention it, it ends in a fight? Why are women allowed to do more than men? They say that women are oppressed, and I agree. But in a way, no man is free. We don't mean to be rude, but whatever we do. We say something wrong, and everyone gets mad at you. One wrong word, one wrong leap. You take the jump and it ends in a heap. A bunch of trash, you're put by. It can hurt someone so much, they want to die." All the stuff that people say about us dudes hurts, too. Keep that in mind before posting things like this.
Iapetos 3 years ago
That post is not about diminishing the struggles of men under patriarchy. It is entirely about pointing out the bullshit women endure. Try to walk in women's shoes for a minute, it won't harm you. Some empathy maybe.
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selioraxemaia 3 years ago
We need to stop making women responsible for unwanted pregnancies. The truth of the matter is that men are responsible, 100%! Outraged? Think that's a ridiculous comment? Consider this then , men have control over where and when they ejaculated. Women have no control over when they ovulate unless they are on the pill. No sperm no pregnant.
Iapetos 3 years ago
Really, the problem isn't men. The problem is that all birth control methods available on the market have some kind of disadvantage and the whole burden is usually placed on women (IUDs, pills, etc.) because we're lacking birth control methods for men! They have no real alternatives between condoms and a vasectomy.
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Stephanie Hewitt 3 years ago
No one claimed all men were guilty, that's dismissive and a copout. Also there was no man bashing in the article. Might want to examine why your response was so defensive.
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Iapetos 3 years ago
There are tons of instances on BP where they list the accomplishments of men! You just turn a blind eye on those, don't you?
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Ren Karlej 3 years ago
Ryan Deschanel - shut up with your utter crap about abortions.
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Aliquid A 3 years ago
When you share a thought that people believe is wrong, they will tell you that it is wrong. That's how free speech works... or did you think that only you are allowed to share your thoughts?
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Iggy 3 years ago
Are you for real? That thing that just flew past your head is the point of this article.
Load More Replies... Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Nah it’s just that you don’t care about issues minorities experience. You can only see yourself, so, naturally you’ll always be a victim.
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Lauren Caswell 3 years ago (edited)
Oh jeez. It's not meant to paint all men as bad. It's highlighting the toxicity built into our culture, and how it impacts us women who experience it. And it's guaranteed that whenever women raise these issues, it's rebutted with 'not all men'. It's diverting from the whole point of the article. Think about how uncomfortable the women are who experience it
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MadDawg 3 years ago
for the men who feel attacked or sad in the comments, I feel attacked and sad when I, a thirteen-year-old girl, get catcalled for wearing leggings or dress coded for "distracting the boys from their education by wearing a tank top in 100-degree weather". This society is so inherently sexist and when you say that people speaking out about their experiences is hurting your feelings, perhaps you are the issue.
RoseTheMad 3 years ago
Heres one of the big ones: If a woman has a lot of sex, she's a sl*t or a wh*re, if a man has a lot of sex he's a "legend" a "proper lad" etc...
Si 3 years ago
And once labelled , a woman is fair game for sexual violence
Load More Replies... KombatBunni 3 years ago
Today I was treated to two instances of being talked down to because of my gender and I was mega p*ssed. Where did this happen? In the two hobby shops here in Melbourne CBD, Victoria Australia.How did this happen? Because I dared to go in and ask got something I needed but apparently these men knew more about what I needed than I did, even after I already told them both I knew exactly what I was after and what it was for. They’re both lucky I was able to keep my temper and not give them both a fkn black eye. Female staff member just looked the other way and my bf just stood there and did nothing :( I’m sick of being treated like an idiot just because I’m female 😡
Bex Hallihan 3 years ago
I have a pretty masculine hobby, I ride motorbikes. We are ALL so over being chopsed at by men who often know less about the engine than we do. I know fuckall about engines, and even I can tell some things are wrong. I told a recovery control that my bike tyre couldn't be repaired at the roadside. He said, oh I'm sure it can, just sit tight and the truck will be along soon". Truck arrives, and lo! My bike tyre is unrepairable roadside... whats that, you'll have to despatch another truck to remove the bike to the shop? The drivers were fine, but equally pissed off.
Load More Replies... Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago (edited)
A lot of dìcks are about to be in a twist over this one.
M 3 years ago
Dudes in comments be like: "Oh I felt super uncomfortable reading this article. Why are you posting stuff like this ?Boo #notallmen". Bro, if you felt uncomfortable reading about this s**t in an article think about how it feels for the women that have to experience this kind of crap themselves, in real life, all the goddammed time. Hint: it's quite a bit worse than uncomfortable. Bonus: implying that the reason why you are an unempathetic, whiny, sexist amoeba is because all the "woke" people are so aggressive and rude to you about this topic is pretty f*****g pathetic
Diane Knight 3 years ago
The men who are heroes are the ones who have leaped up when they see or hear a waitress respond to a guy who just groped her, and take that pos out of his chair and grab him between his legs. Only then does a guy truly understand how it is for a woman to be groped by a man?
Load More Replies... Iggy 3 years ago
The level of anger this article has generated saddens me. We still have so far to go. Acknowledging there's a problem is the first step in resolving it. It does not mean anyone here has been personally accused. As for the 'what-about'-ers, it's not a competition.
Aliquid A 3 years ago
I just went through the list and 88% of the posts were about a specific guy "this guy said this to me", or about a specific type of guy "men who say ___ are jerks". Yet people are crying in the comments here "Why are they blaming all men? I didn't do anything? You are so mean!!". They DIDN'T blame all men. You clearly need to work on your reading comprehension skills.
BleepBloop73 2 years ago
hello i am from the future. (This is still an issue in 2022)
Load More Replies... Javiera Gotelli 3 years ago
I feel sad for women who put up with this crap. Even more so, for the ones who married assholes and assumed they would change over time...
Sleepyhead 3 years ago
It’s articles like these that remind me that learning more about women’s issues is a continuous process because these are continuous problems. Thank you everyone for sharing, it’s helpful to see discussion.
BoredRaccoon 3 years ago
The amount of angry comments speak for themselves. I don’t remember the women of bored panda being this pressed when there was a post addressing how toxic masculinity harms men.
Myrkur 3 years ago
One thing that pisses me off most about `pro-life` is that they really think that a some growing cells have more rights and need more protection then a whole living human being. And as soon as a baby is born when someone couldn't get an abortion those same people are nowhere to be found
Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago
Maybe you don't understand that, so I will make it clear for you : murder is wrong.
Load More Replies... Evo Laurel 3 years ago (edited)
I was a competitive figure skater during high school, and my gym teacher refused to let me do any of the 'strong' exercises (ie using any weights over 5IBS) because I was a girl. My best friend at the time would always trade w/ me after the teacher forced me to only use the light ones b/c he wasn't able to use the 15IBS, but I could (in situps and the like). Also going to college and being told that women should stay at home to fix the house up nice and have dinner ready when the man walks into the door, and shouldn't be in classes learning how to fix cars. The high school also refused to let the girls wear jeans and tshirts, only long dresses, polos and either skirts or dress pants. The boys usually wore tshirts and jeans.
marianne eliza 3 years ago
#1: me, 7 years old: Mom? When I sit on pop-pop's lap, he touches me down there. Mom: Then don't sit on his lap! me: to my 7 year old self; if it happens again, it's my fault. It did. Many, many times. Until I was 15. Sadly, he was widowed and lived with us, his only daughter's family cause he couldn't live with his sons as they would clash like roosters.
Nora AlMeida 3 years ago
It’s insane that, that sick lowlife of a so-called, ‘grandfather’ did that to you— it’s also insane that your mother and any other person didn’t call the police on him to throw him in prison.
Load More Replies... Harry Potter 3 years ago
I was listening Willow Smith "21st Century Girl" while reading this and it saddened me and the word on her shirt said "Boys need to learn" or something. True they do *I am 2 lazy 2 go back nd check *
WiTchY_WoMaN 3 years ago
Articles like this make me sick.. I had to stop reading. It's always an endless circle of arguments... Screen devices have made it so much easier for people to say offensive things to one another. Disgusting..
matthew owen 3 years ago
I feel a lot of these things are only in America, but can any women tell me if I'm right?
Lauren Caswell 3 years ago
No this is everywhere. I'm in nz and there is a super toxic culture for women and for men
Load More Replies... Christian Storms 3 years ago (edited)
This scratches my nerves very uncomfortably. I am male. I might have done some of these things. Don't get me wrong, I am in control of my libido as much as I am in control of my aggressions or possessive impulses - I don't steal, I don't hit, I don't molest, let alone rape. But I do have impulses. I do have the impulse to take what isn't mine, to assault who did me wrong, to... again take what is not mine. I think we all have, but I hope from sentient beings that we can and will control them. But this sad experiences of so many girls and women tell different stories. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to react. Ignoring what I have been taught as gallantery - open doors, taking the heavy lifting, treating ladies like fragile, delicate beings - strikes me as rude behaviour, but doing so is subliminal sexist. Offering company or having an eye over the drinks of girls or butting in in a quarrel, I just end up looking like the next offender waiting in line...
Christian Storms 3 years ago (edited)
Reading this again, it sounds like the "it's not me" whine you're so rightfully sick off. Sorry. What can I, as an individual male, do - other than not being that guy and making sure my sons won't be, either? Of course I should step in where I see missing consent. But: a) I once got mobbed by a bunch of sickos because "their girl" was polite to me and I was polite to her. We're talking about holding the door and thanks... So please don't assume that every man in your vicinity has the balls to jump in like superman but just doesn't care. Those of us who do care don't have the balls to jump in, because we are the ones that get mauled by those sexist macho sickos, too. b) more than once I got berated by the girl since obviously I disturbed their crude mating ritual where she wants to be stalked after her first 3 "No!"s. She wants no softy gay limp noodle but a real man who can take her like he pleases... like what the hell, girl?! Ill try to be a better person, to help where Im welcome.
Load More Replies... Sofia Herrera 3 years ago
My parents tell me to wear pants when my dad's friend cones over, I was wearing a hoodie and jeans, he stared me up and down like a piece of meat, his wife was right there, my mom stepped in for me but my dad didn't do anything. Please teach your boys respect so they don't grow up to put other girls in my situation, which is nothing compared to what others go through
Mette Stenersen 3 years ago
The U.S. is really heading in the wrong direction. How is it possible in this day and age to ban abortions? I'm glad I live in Norway, it seems there are a lot more issues between genders than where I live.
Bee Jairrels 3 years ago
I know im going to get downvoted to hell for this but some the post is toxic and rude. Abuse does apply to everyone. I know abuse can occur but it does happen to everyone.
Rannveig Ess 3 years ago
Still wondering why BP insists on posting articles that do nothing but incite people to name call, half the comments are hidden because they're rude, obnoxious and mean, lots of the usual America Bashing, lots of down votes for anyone who politely and intelligently doesn't post with the accepted mindset of the other BP members, lots of misinformation and the usual division into "you" them" Republicans" Americans" you're ignorant" garbage as "comments". Of all the laughing and crying I've done on this site today, it all slams to a halt and I leave because I just don't see a reason to choose and feature articles that are just going to upset people and bring out the trolls or hit a nerve. There's so much out there so why fish around on Reddit and Twitter and IG and FB for the most dividing stories out there? This site is so much fun when it's interesting and based on the smart, friendly, educating commonalities of us all. Why throw a bomb in all the time and blow things up, BP?
Cian Thomas McHugh 3 years ago
Found this poem on Reddit that I think applies here. Credit to u/Poetry_duderino for it. "Why is it that when she says it, it's all right? Why is it that when I mention it, it ends in a fight? Why are women allowed to do more than men? They say that women are oppressed, and I agree. But in a way, no man is free. We don't mean to be rude, but whatever we do. We say something wrong, and everyone gets mad at you. One wrong word, one wrong leap. You take the jump and it ends in a heap. A bunch of trash, you're put by. It can hurt someone so much, they want to die." All the stuff that people say about us dudes hurts, too. Keep that in mind before posting things like this.
Iapetos 3 years ago
That post is not about diminishing the struggles of men under patriarchy. It is entirely about pointing out the bullshit women endure. Try to walk in women's shoes for a minute, it won't harm you. Some empathy maybe.
Load More Replies... selioraxemaia 3 years ago
We need to stop making women responsible for unwanted pregnancies. The truth of the matter is that men are responsible, 100%! Outraged? Think that's a ridiculous comment? Consider this then , men have control over where and when they ejaculated. Women have no control over when they ovulate unless they are on the pill. No sperm no pregnant.
Iapetos 3 years ago
Really, the problem isn't men. The problem is that all birth control methods available on the market have some kind of disadvantage and the whole burden is usually placed on women (IUDs, pills, etc.) because we're lacking birth control methods for men! They have no real alternatives between condoms and a vasectomy.
Load More Replies... Stephanie Hewitt 3 years ago
No one claimed all men were guilty, that's dismissive and a copout. Also there was no man bashing in the article. Might want to examine why your response was so defensive.
Load More Replies... Iapetos 3 years ago
There are tons of instances on BP where they list the accomplishments of men! You just turn a blind eye on those, don't you?
Load More Replies... Ren Karlej 3 years ago
Ryan Deschanel - shut up with your utter crap about abortions.
Load More Replies... Aliquid A 3 years ago
When you share a thought that people believe is wrong, they will tell you that it is wrong. That's how free speech works... or did you think that only you are allowed to share your thoughts?
Load More Replies... Iggy 3 years ago
Are you for real? That thing that just flew past your head is the point of this article.
Load More Replies... Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Nah it’s just that you don’t care about issues minorities experience. You can only see yourself, so, naturally you’ll always be a victim.
Load More Replies... Lauren Caswell 3 years ago (edited)
Oh jeez. It's not meant to paint all men as bad. It's highlighting the toxicity built into our culture, and how it impacts us women who experience it. And it's guaranteed that whenever women raise these issues, it's rebutted with 'not all men'. It's diverting from the whole point of the article. Think about how uncomfortable the women are who experience it
Load More Replies... 
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