When I said "in rape culture even the police doesn't help, especially in cases of almost-rape" I was speaking in general, not especially about this woman. In the case I mentioned earlier, the police saying "you weren't raped, so there's nothing to do" basically equates to "we won't help you until it's too late." Which is beyond ridiculous. Well, what could the police do? They could send just 1 or 2 plainclothes to stakeout said place around said time for the next few days, check if the stalkers return to prey on a new target. But when my friend suggested as much, they laughed in her face and repeated the same thing. They could at least check the many CCTV cameras around the mall where it happened, see if their car returned, see if they do something bad, without even leaving the station. My point was, the police didn't even attempt to try, sadly they just didn't care. That's why I doubt anything would happen if this lady took these messages to the police.

She wasn't ALMOST raped. She knew well enough to never meet him. And the police can't arrest a guy before he commits a crime. I'm not saying at ALL she shouldn't report him, but it's kind of annoying with the tone of blame toward the police as if they COULD act but choose not to. Report it so they have a history, but I don't know of what could BE done about this other than name and shame.

Sadly, the police do not have much power if no crime is committed yet. Perverts like this have "rights". If you are not a "Real" victim yet - just leave and hope you can get away before something fatal happen. And they are surprised why women are so suspicious, like we don't have any reasons to be ....

Layla yes, agree to disagree. To your earlier point, I don't think we will ever get to the point that we simply stop trying no matter how many people need help. I personally don't think that. And I wasn't implying that we should ever stop trying just because the resources are low. I was just saying that if you were in charge of that same police station, for ex., your friend went to (horrible what happened to her by the way) and assuming you didn't know her, how would you propose to handle every case/problem/potential threat, given you only had x amount of time, ppl, staff, funding, etc to devote. It's easy for us to say we'd do it better (not that you yourself said that necessary). But these are very complex issues that dont always have clear cut solutions. Iappreciate having a respectful dialogue with someone who is willing to hear someone out despite having differing opinions. Thanks for that! Positive vibes only!!

Kartoshka If we start applying that kind of logic, how long do you think it will take before we start saying "since we can't help everyone, we shouldn't try to help anyone"? Because that's what it boils down to. Since we can't watch every potential rapist, if we get a report on one particular potential rapist, we shouldn't bother acting on it. We shouldn't take it seriously. We can't protect all potential victims, so why bother with these few? See the problem here? Also I disagree that this post sounds made up, but to each their own. We can agree to disagree, no hard feelings.

Well no, it's because in our justice system; people are presumed innocent until proven guilty. The police won't, and legally can't, do anything just because you think someone is creepy.

Layla I get that that in theory that sounds like it's a fair solution. But do you think that it's actually practical for two cops to sit on a suspected person for two days for every single complaint they get? I'm not an expert on law enforcement but that doesn't seem realistic. Not to mention the level of paranoia it would create if just my accusation could result in cops following you for two days. What if I accused you of something and cops just sat watching you for two days? Can you see the problem? I get your sentiment but we need REAL SOLUTIONS that actually work in REAL LIFE. People need protection from creeps who prey on people. But just because there aren't enough resources available to follow up on potential threats doesn't mean cops don't care. Regardless, this post seems like it was made up

What do you think is the proper recourse for that behavior?

If it's clear that he isn't normal, which I totally agree, wouldn't that undermine the premise that "that's the thing with rape culture"? These are mutually exclusive. If his behavior WAS seen as normal, that would be more indicative of a culture that normalized his behavior. As far as I can tell, I don't see any scenario in which his behavior would not be largely regarded as either completely crazy or some sort of prank.

yeah, its categorized as stalking. Which implies that the police want something really bad to happen to you before they do anything about it. Recent Dateline NBC story literally called "She did everything right." Documented harassment, tried to get restraining orders, showed videos of him breaking into her apartment, etc., and she still got killed by the guy.