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Man’s “Fantasy” Makes Girlfriend Sick To Her Stomach, Now She Feels “Horrible” For Dumping Him
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Man’s “Fantasy” Makes Girlfriend Sick To Her Stomach, Now She Feels “Horrible” For Dumping Him

Man’s “Fantasy” Makes Girlfriend Sick To Her Stomach, Now She Feels “Horrible” For Dumping HimWoman Too Grossed Out To Stay After BF Reveals His “Fantasy”, Now She Feels Bad For Dumping HimWoman Is Disgusted After BF Reveals His Bedroom Fantasy, Dumps HimWoman Too Grossed Out To Stay In Relationship After BF Reveals His “Fantasy”“Was He Hoping It Would Actually Happen?”: Man Reveals His Fantasy To Girlfriend, Ends Up SingleMan Reveals His 'Fantasy' To Girlfriend Who Has Triplet Sisters, She Dumps Him On The Spot“That’d Be Kinda Trippy”: Boyfriend’s Disturbing Triplet Fantasy Shatters RelationshipWoman Dumps Boyfriend After Accidentally Finding Out About His Creepy FantasyWoman Confronts Guy’s Disturbing Triplet Fantasy, Is Disturbed To Hear Her BF Agreeing With Him“Am I The Jerk For Breaking Up With My BF When He Said Me And My Sisters Are A ‘Fantasy’?”
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Trust and respect are fundamental in any relationship, but especially in romantic ones. It can be utterly devastating to learn that your partner constantly fantasizes about sleeping with other people. But in some cases, this can get a whole lot worse.

One anonymous woman, a triplet, asked the r/AITAH subreddit for their input about a dramatic situation in her life. She revealed that she broke up with her partner after he disgusted her with a ‘fantasy’ he had involving her and her sisters. Read on for the story, as well as the internet’s reactions. Bored Panda has reached out to the author via Reddit, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.

One challenge that triplets and twins face is that they sometimes become the focus of other people’s ‘fantasies’

Image credits: Suhyeon Choi (Not the actual photo)

A woman shared how she ended up dumping her partner when he opened up about having romantic thoughts about her and her siblings

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Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages (Not the actual photo)

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Image credits: FullDoughnut9777

Fantasizing about other people is fine for some, but there are those who feel like it’s akin to cheating

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For some people, fantasizing about someone else while they’re in a relationship is innocent enough. However, some individuals believe that having these thoughts is cheating, even if the other person doesn’t act on those fantasies.

Whether or not someone finds it acceptable for their partner to think about other people in a romantic way will depend entirely on the relationship. What you and your partner’s values and boundaries are and what your relationship dynamics are will determine how you feel about this.

Certified sexologist Tyomi Morgan told The Knot that people fantasize about others because they have traits they desire but don’t have access to in real life. In other cases, fantasizing happens when someone isn’t happy in their relationship or if they’re feeling sexually frustrated.

“The only access that they have is in their own mind. So they’ll take the persona of that person, their qualities, their traits and then just daydream a little bit about them, which gives them the feeling of having an interaction with them, or even having a relationship with them, even though it’s just a fantasy,” the expert shared.

According to her, daydreaming and having romantic fantasies can keep one’s erotic imagination healthy and allow someone to be creative without harming the relationship. However, in some cases, someone’s partner may be uncomfortable with this if it goes against their expectations or boundaries.

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Image credits: Dương Nhân (Not the actual photo)

There’s a serious issue if these daydreams become more important than the person’s partner or real life

“It is unhealthy to tell somebody you can’t think about another person, you can’t fantasize, because you’re telling a person they can’t be human,” Morgan warned.

Romantic fantasies become unhealthy when they start disconnecting you from your partner, and your responsibilities, and begin affecting your daily life. In short, if someone’s obsessed with their fantasies more than their real life, it’s a problem that might need the help of a therapist to move past.

“When the fantasizing takes the place of their real life interactions with this person who they’re in relationship with, and they say that they love and they’re committed to, that’s when it becomes unhealthy,” the expert said.

Everyone has romantic fantasies of some sort. It would be naive to think that they don’t. They’re very common. But their type is going to differ from person to person. Some are more vanilla. Others are raunchier.

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Image credits: Budgeron Bach (Not the actual photo)

It’s helpful if both partners are on the same page in terms of what they want romantically

The issue is that, in some cases, there’s a lack of compatibility between the expectations that people have in a relationship. If the couple has wildly different romantic desires, there might be some tension there.

To put it bluntly, if one person has romantic fantasies that put their partner off, then the relationship is on shaky ground. There’s incompatibility.

Of course, this does not mean that one person should relent and do something that goes against their wishes. There has to be consent. Both individuals have to feel comfortable.

There’s also the question of emotional vulnerability and trust at play here. Ideally, both partners should feel comfortable enough to open up about their romantic desires without feeling judged. (After all, not everyone plans to go through with their fantasies.)

However, that’s easier said than done. Some desires might genuinely make the other person uncomfortable, and their instant reaction can be disgust, fear, embarrassment, or even anger.

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What would you have done if you were in the author’s shoes, dear Pandas? Where would you draw the line when it comes to these sorts of romantic desires? Do you think both partners have to be on the same page in terms of fantasies for the relationship to work out? Let us know what you think in the comments.

Image credits: Min An (Not the actual photo)

Many internet users were shocked by what happened. Here’s what they said

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However, not everyone saw the situation the same way. A few readers had a different take

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Jonas Grinevičius

Jonas Grinevičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

Read less »
Jonas Grinevičius

Jonas Grinevičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

Justinas Keturka

Justinas Keturka

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

Read less »

Justinas Keturka

Justinas Keturka

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

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CanadianDimes
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gotta make sure we have representation from those who are themselves åssholes, I guess 🙄🙄

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Ritchat
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no idea how this can be a sexy fantasy. Sex with siblings = Incest. I guess the "YTA"-people tend to forget how hell-a-f*cking-weird this is for the sisters. Aside from the whole objectifying them and not seeing them as actual separate persons.

xolitaire
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Those guys don't see this as sex between actual people. That's why the incest part doesn't even play a part for them. They basically de-humanize their own partner into several identical "props" they can "use". They are supposed to have sex with HIM, no with each other. That's why this is not a "kink", it's just a disgusting r*pe fantasy

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CanadianDimes
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gotta make sure we have representation from those who are themselves åssholes, I guess 🙄🙄

Load More Replies...
Ritchat
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no idea how this can be a sexy fantasy. Sex with siblings = Incest. I guess the "YTA"-people tend to forget how hell-a-f*cking-weird this is for the sisters. Aside from the whole objectifying them and not seeing them as actual separate persons.

xolitaire
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Those guys don't see this as sex between actual people. That's why the incest part doesn't even play a part for them. They basically de-humanize their own partner into several identical "props" they can "use". They are supposed to have sex with HIM, no with each other. That's why this is not a "kink", it's just a disgusting r*pe fantasy

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