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Desperate Woman Is Giving Away Her ‘A**HOLE ROOSTER’, And Her Post Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

A woman from Michigan named Denell McCaul, who is giving away her rooster wrote a very honest ad, cracking up the Internet. She writes: “FREE to good home. Well, any home really. At this point I don’t give a shit what kind of home this inconsiderate jerk goes to: ASSHOLE ROOSTER.”

In the long and detailed post about the rooster, McCaul describes the bird’s personality in great detail.

First, forget your sleep. “He’s the perfect rooster if your alarm is broken and you need to be awake at 5:30 a.m…”. Furthermore, McCaul promises that the rooster will help you get into shape and learn how to dance. She says you will be running around the yard and looking like you’re making some strange dance moves – all while trying to protect yourself from the rooster’s aggressive behavior.

“So, if you’re looking for an alarm clock with the only setting being 5:30 a.m., a personal trainer and a dance instructor, I have the perfect rooster that is able to fill all 3 of those positions FOR FREE!”

Oh, but you must come out to ‘catch this asshole’ yourself, as McCaul wants to see your first interpretive dance lesson. Are you sold yet?

More info: Facebook (h/t: someecards)

One woman just posted a hilarious ad for her ‘A**HOLE ROOSTER’, and the Internet can’t handle it

Desperate Woman Is Giving Away Her ‘A**HOLE ROOSTER’, And Her Post Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

The Internet reacted:

Desperate Woman Is Giving Away Her ‘A**HOLE ROOSTER’, And Her Post Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

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What do you think ?

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Susan Urbanczyk 7 years ago

It is amazing to me that there is a thread going here on how to "tame" this rooster by using abuse. You do all know it is abusive right. I have been a trainer all my life. I am known for my work with abused horses that everyone says there is no hope for. I have trained everything from a cat to a chicken. A rooster's job is to protect his girls. They are not mean. They just are doing their job. I grew up with chickens and roosters and they all were lap chickens. You do not stop a Rooster form doing what he is programmed to do by kicking, shaking it by the neck, throwing it or any other violent method. I would happily take this guy. I am a bit scared now for his fate since so many people here think being violent with him is the solution.

26points

Melody Lanzatella 6 years ago

Just read this entire thing. I am really tired of people that obtain animals, and the get pissed AT THE ANIMAL for acting like an animal! PEOPLE!!! Before you get ANY animal PLEASE, practice due diligence to see what type of behavior you can expect once you have it! If people take in ANY animal without researching it first, YOU deserve EVERYTHING YOU GET!

0points

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Kalvan Morrison 7 years ago

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Paul Mays 7 years ago

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Linda Gulley 7 years ago

WTF! It's a rooster. You're angry with the rooster for acting like rooster and doing rooster things? YOU are the problem. This rooter kicks a*s.

16points

Beth Pirtle 7 years ago

Stupid people should not own animals. Any idiot knows that roosters wake you up early. DON'T own one if that is something you can not handle. Blaming a rooster for your stupidity is really, really..well stupid.

5points

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John L 7 years ago

The problem is that this rooster has established himself as the apex/alpha male, and everything is his property, including the woman. And her running away only fortifies this to him. Canada geese do the same thing. The person has to establish her dominance over the rooster, by being aggressive and dangerous to him. A pair of gloves and the ability to quickly grab the rooster by the neck is a great first step. Then shake the rooster good and hard, followed by swiftly throwing it a good distance. When the rooster shakes things off, you go after him again with "You want more of this?" Once the rooster decides to evade you, you have won alpha male/female status, and the rooster will be nice to you. ;D

15points

Hayley Lightcap 7 years ago

Is that really how it works? It sounds violent.

22points

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Janice Foster 7 years ago

We had to take a similar approach with a rooster - he was chasing everyone and everything, and made the mistake of running over a friend's shoe. The friend kicked his leg up, unbalancing the rooster, then hung the rooster upside down by his feet for a grew seconds. It did the trick - the rooster seemed to feel emasculated, and there was never a peep out of him again!

12points

Marianne Airey 7 years ago

Is that before or after someone has you arrested for animal cruelty? HAHAHA:-)

9points

Aunt Messy 7 years ago

I'd have to check for spurs first. Those little devils are sharp. My mother had a pet bantam rooster. He was a gorgeous little demon who would ride around on her hat in the winter. She was his person, though. This little four pound bird would protect her from anything. Other people. Barn swallows. Dust.

7points

Death Metal Kitty 7 years ago

The best way to asset your dominance is to have him for dinner. He might not be good for anything, but at least he'll be good for you after leg day.

2points

Master Markus 7 years ago

The neck grabbing, shaking and throwing seems a bit excessive. I mean, they can't do that to each other or anything... could you grab it somewhere else and throw it? Or grab it by the neck but not shake it like a dog trying to kill something?

1point

Mary Bittle 6 years ago

That's the most ridiculous thing I've seen on the internet all week (though it's early, yet). Different birds react differently, but the best way to civilize a rooster is to catch him, hold him down like they hold down hens for mating, and hold him there until he stops struggling. Then, pick him up and carry him around where everyone else in his flock sees it, and he can see that they see him. Then set him down again next to you, and hold him down again, like before. This teaches him YOU are the alpha rooster (the "mating" and the carrying around shows that to him) and before long he will either keep his distance from you, and start treating you with respect, or (around here, at least) you make sure he doesn't get to spread his genetic material to the next generation by having chicken and noodles. Well-behaved roosters can still protect their flock while understanding that humans are higher on the pecking order than they are. Violence is not needed.

0points