Plenty of us know that the gender of our babies doesn’t matter—we’ll love ‘em to bits no matter who they are. However, the way that some nations on Earth look down on girls with disdain, as well as the inherent pro-male bias still present in the West (gender reveal parties, anyone?) shows us that we’ve still got a long way to go toward equality.
TikTok user Emraynea, aka teenager Emma from Arizona, made a viral video in which she’s calling out sexist men who don’t want to have a daughter. She then goes on to explain that she herself would be scared to have a daughter because of these kinds of men and the sons that they raise poorly.
Check out Emma’s full video below, dear Pandas, and once you’re done watching it, share your thoughts below.
More info: TikTok | Instagram | YouTube
You can watch Emma’s powerful and candid TikTok video right here
@emraynea♬ original sound – emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Image credits: emraynea
Gender reveal parties and the reactions of some parents are one example of having a sexist mindset
Image credits: Talske
These sorts of reactions happen even in viral videos
Image credits: Talske
Emma’s video got over 1.9 million likes, 31.9k comments, and was shared more than 107.1k times on TikTok. A lot of people praised the high school senior for calling out some men’s clear preference to have a son instead of a daughter.
The TikToker pointed out that if she were to ever have a daughter, she’d have to teach her how to protect herself from other people’s sons. Emma also touched upon the sensitive topics of teenage pregnancy, non-consensual relationships, and others.
“So, how about instead of hoping and praying that you don’t have a daughter, you go ahead and realize why you don’t want to have a daughter, and that’s because you’re scared of other boys looking at her the way that you look at girls today. And that’s all,” Emma ended her video on a very powerful note, showing some men’s hypocrisy and denial.
Emma told BuzzFeed’s very own Shelby Heinrich that she hopes her videos can change other people’s perspectives and stir up some change.
“I believe that there are much more important issues involved in worrying about having a daughter than her being comfortable with her own body, like the things I listed in the video. You’ll find comments [from men] like that all over the app. Mainly on videos of women showing a bit of skin or talking about their sexuality openly,” she told BuzzFeed.
“I 100% think men and women are treated differently on the app. A woman cannot post a video of herself without men in the comments degrading, sexualizing, or insulting her. However, a man can post whatever he wants and be praised for it,” Emma shared that sexism is rampant on TikTok.
“Something I never see being talked about is how scary it actually is to live in this world as a woman. Speaking for myself and lots of other women, we live in constant fear of men. I can’t name one woman in my life who hasn’t been sexually assaulted, abused, or harassed by men. From a young age, we’re taught how to protect ourselves from men, but why aren’t we teaching men from a young age how to control themselves and respect women?”
Here’s how some people have been reacting to Emma’s take on sexism and society
When my wife and I found out we where having a daughter a guy at work said "Wait until you have a son. You'll be like *fist pump*." Wasn't even a dad yet, and I think he really meant well in his own way, but I damn near knocked him out flat. I'm not a violent guy, but that one caught me off guard. The thought of not having my daughter makes me sick. No real man could care more or less about the gender of their child.
*fist bump* that. i can't work an hour without watching some pics of her.
Load More Replies...My late father, who is not always missed, refused to show affection to his daughters ---- all he had was the two of us, both girls! ----- b/c y'know, our bodies made HIM uncomfy. Excuse me? What dad even thinks of his kids in terms of boobs and vaginas in any way that means you end up with lifelong body shame? He was violent, he was angry, he demanded we be like sons, he demanded we never mention being female ----- which was awkward with two menstruating girls at once. Fast forward 40 years, and I hear a second cousin say, "God, I hate having girls, they're gonna get boobs and I'll hvae to see that." ..... So, yes, such slimy men exist, and make daughters feel hideously wrong just for being *daughters*. It hurts girls enormously, IMHO. My sister's issues messed her up way worse than mine have messed up *me*, and I freely admit I've got volumes of issues.
It’s so sad that they’re so hung-ho for boys like girls are a waste of space, and after being raised those boys will turn into pos who also don’t want daughters, and the toxic cycle continues. All these parents who value one gender over another are raising more difficult people.
Yeah I’m not having kids at all but I’d be particularly scared to have a daughter bc I live in United States and there are almost no enforceable laws against rape here. Women get raped by the police constantly and most states allow it
Where in the actual hell do you live? There are all kinds of laws against rape and women getting raped by the police all the time?? No states allow this. Now stalking laws? That's a whole different animal. In my state they have no stalking laws which is sickening.
Load More Replies...The YouTube video Tea Consent. It clearly explains how to interpret the answer given when asked if they want to have sex. A must see for teenagers, girls and guys.
I raised my daughter on my own after losing my wife to cancer when my daughter was only three. It hasn't been easy as a man raisng a daughter on my own given a lack of family support and my daughters struggles due to her autism and learning disability but would I have prefered to have a son over a daughter, nope, not at all! My daughter likes all the girl stuff I can't really help her with but she's also a PC gamer geek just like her old dad. If i had a son he might of liked football or some other boring sport and I don't care for any of that, lol.
i can't wait to introduce mine to my boring sport :). i can't imagine doing it all alone though. i now understand the "it takes a village to raise..." comment.
Load More Replies...I don't plan on having kids (especially daughter), this world is just so messed up. And in my society (which is conservative), yet they treat women harsher than men when it comes to religion things. I just don't think that i can be a good father for my kids.
every parent feels inadequate at some point. if you make your little corner of the world better it's a bit less messed up. So don't let those kind of posts even further discourage you.
Load More Replies...That guy saying “No!” to the pink balloons is a disgusting human. Gag. So gross. Daughter isn’t even born yet and she’s already set up to fail. He shouldn’t be allowed to have kids. And FYI someone being more hopeful to have a certain gender kid isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but to be negative about who your OWN CHILD is as a PERSON who you created - that’s just disgusting. 🤮
I hope to never have children, and that won't be hard for me. Because I'm scared of both the fact that if I have a daughter, she'll be harassed, or if I have a son, I won't teach him well enough and he'll be the one harassing.
if you care enough to be scared you'll do bad, it's a good start for parenting. You'll do bad some days ... but not my-son-rapes-every-girl-bad.
Load More Replies...I'm happy that I never experienced any of the things Americans seem to go through, and neither did my friends. No sexual assault, no wage gap, no being scared to walk alone at night, none of that. It must suck to live in a country that pretends to be 1st world, but is so dangerous to women.
I suspect that this issue lurks in more places than the US. That is not to the credit of the US, but it is worth remembering that we can't assume "Oh I live here, I am safe". Famous last words, y'know?
Load More Replies...I remember seeing something on here once about cats vs dogs that has stuck with me. Cats are good place to start for teaching children about the concept of consent. I have noticed a connection between men who say they HATE cats and those who simply prefer dogs and how they treat women, unless allergies are involved. Those with control and consent issues tend to detest cats.
wen me and my husband start having kids i dont care boy or girl either way they r gonna learn how to treat the opposite sex for all types of situations good or bad. i want my kids to know both respect and how to defend themselves if needed. i was in an abusive relationship i dont want a daughter of mine dealing with that or abusing the boy and i dont want a son of mine doing that or getting abused by a girl. and if they choose to like the same sex then ok ill teach them how to respect and how to not let ppl who have problems with gay or lesbian couples bother them. a parent should never hope they dont get a certain gender. they should love and raise the child properly boy or girl
the post is indeed about people who don't want a daughter. very on topic :). Any specific reason why
Load More Replies...My family has had a long line of daughters. I have 3 (kind of 4, it's a really long story) autns, and my mom had 2 daughters (but I have 4 sisters. A half sibling and a sister in-law <3), and my aunts each had at least one daughter. Two of my aunt's girls (my cousins) each had a daughter. ♀️♀️♀️
I don't want a daughter because I've gone through the stages of life and just no lol get mad at it if you want. I don't care. talk all the female garbage if you want. goes in one ear and out the other. truly. if I don't want a daughter for whatever reason im entitled to feel that way. get a life. females really be out here acting like they have it so damn hard. teach your daughter how to treat men and what to look for in a man. all this I will teach my son this and that like these bi&$hes out here are innocent. clowns on this comment section are pretty funny. I'll teach my son to not fall for women lies. cause they tell a lot. turn your cheek when they cry wolf. its a tactic. never chase them. no ones daughter is worth it. be nice and respectful but never get friend zoned.you know. real advice. not like these single moms teaching their sons to be the men they never slept with.
My son will not be one of these men. My husband is not one of these men. Raise your boys right, people. Thankful to my MIL, who raised an amazing man.
As the mother of a 13-year-old-boy, I am making sure he knows how to treat a woman. He knows about periods and respecting omen, He has stood up for girls at school when other boys act inappropriately toward them and has even walked other girls places "to be safe" I have also been teaching him that if he sees a girl (even one that he does not know) looking uncomfortable around a guy to pretend to be friends with the girl to get her out of the situation. Heck, he even did this for a gay boy he knew of but didn't really know. I would have loved to have had a daughter but I was blessed with a son. It's my job to raise him to be a gentleman and not a sexist jerk.
Lemme clear some things up for some people who might need it; one, there is nothing you can do with your son that you can't do with your daughter and two, for #notallmen people, SHE NEVER SAID ALL MEN!
I would personally like to have a son and a daughter, though it will be rough sometimes raising them in today's world. I'm prepared for that. I'm a little upset that all the reactions in the article were from women only. I would have like to see some men reacting to it. It's nice to see the men joining the conversation here.
I have friends who have daughters and, though I appreciate those girls and care a lot about them, I am so very grateful that I had two boys. No dramas. No issues. Lots in common. This girl is demonstrating why some people don't want girls and she simply can't see past herself to see the real reason why <- which is the real reason why.
To men afraid of having daughters: just be glad you have a kid at all. I'm the only child in my family and I'm female. Dad was delighted to have me after Mom miscarried twice before me. Be like them.
Looks like BoredPanda is slowly turning into DramaPanda. Sad
or "Here's 14 close ups of a woman making 14 faces so she can show off her HD make up that it took 2 hours to do. We'll put one sentence on each so you can look at something, tho"
I think everyone needs to stop focusing on raising either or, and raising OUR CHILDREN correctly. For example. Boys need to be raised to be respectful yes. Chivarly? Yes. But no one talks about their daughters. Let's talk about how many PRE-TEEN girls I see walking around dressed like they are going to a club? How about teaching our daughters respect for their own bodies before demanding respect from boys? How about teaching your sons to carry tampons / pads in their bags to come to the rescue for a girl in need and not be grossed out at a normal function? My son(s) do this. My 16 yo has already broken up with a girl or two for trying to force HIM into physical acts he's not ready for. He's also broken up with a girl after many times of her "fishing for compliments" so how about we raise our kids to learn self respect AND respect for eachother?
This post is stupid. Just because some guy worries about other men abusing his daughter if he were to have one, that does not mean he himself abused anyone.
Panda - "Men really need to open up more and talk about their thoughts and fears!" Men - "Okay, well this thing really scares me...." Panda - "No not like THAT!!! Talk about fears we agree with"
The few in this thread are all thesame men and women that complain about everything.The jaimie Lannister guy has said horrendous things about women on here and he's the biggest complainer when he or other abusive men get called out.Hey weirdos for the umpteenth time we know it's not all men but it is all women and if you're offended by this post it's bc you're the problem you know you are bc you've been told multiple times you're not nice men. Women stay away from you bc of that. If you're so completely unself aware and cannot understand that being offended by this probably bc you are this kind of man then there is no hope for you.You just want an excuse to keep abusing women and children.none of you men seem to have a problem w the fact that 98% of all women will be sexually violated in some way by the time they're 14.That's ok w you as long as your precious 1/2% of men may have to go tocourt bc of a false allegation that is what upsets not the fact that girls are violatedall the time
What about is your son grows up and gets a TIKTOK to post sexist things.
Load More Replies...Making an awareness post on social media, where people will see it and I don't know, maybe Raise Awareness? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa? The nerve of this girl! (sarcasm)
Load More Replies...To worry about his duaghters is okay. To not want daughters is what she's talkng about. Unless you don't want kidsin general then it's ok.
Load More Replies...Missndty? Bc women call out misogynistic men that's misandry wtf? Maybe you should've listened better or read what misandry is.
Load More Replies...Why, because she made a valid and proper point? Unless you've said you don't want a daughter, this doesn't apply to you, so if you're insulted, you're admitting to behaving like this.
Load More Replies...it's not about "rag on men". it's about calling out a toxic behaviour that some men do.
Load More Replies...They weren't calling out all men. They were calling out the men who throw tantrums over having a daughter. If you're insulted, you're admitting to behaving like that.
Load More Replies...It's awful strange that's all you type of men are worried about when it never happens. But you're never concerned that 98% of rapists lie about being rapists. They lie and get out of going to prison only 3% of rapists actually see a court. Only 11/2% actually see jail time. Where is the outrage? Instead you're concerned about less than 1/2% of a false accusation will end up in court. Such a piece of crap false equivalency is causing a problem for survivors of rape you claim never happen but it actually happens to a majority of women by the time theyre 14. Where's the outrage? Just say you hate women be honest for once in your miserable life
Load More Replies...When my wife and I found out we where having a daughter a guy at work said "Wait until you have a son. You'll be like *fist pump*." Wasn't even a dad yet, and I think he really meant well in his own way, but I damn near knocked him out flat. I'm not a violent guy, but that one caught me off guard. The thought of not having my daughter makes me sick. No real man could care more or less about the gender of their child.
*fist bump* that. i can't work an hour without watching some pics of her.
Load More Replies...My late father, who is not always missed, refused to show affection to his daughters ---- all he had was the two of us, both girls! ----- b/c y'know, our bodies made HIM uncomfy. Excuse me? What dad even thinks of his kids in terms of boobs and vaginas in any way that means you end up with lifelong body shame? He was violent, he was angry, he demanded we be like sons, he demanded we never mention being female ----- which was awkward with two menstruating girls at once. Fast forward 40 years, and I hear a second cousin say, "God, I hate having girls, they're gonna get boobs and I'll hvae to see that." ..... So, yes, such slimy men exist, and make daughters feel hideously wrong just for being *daughters*. It hurts girls enormously, IMHO. My sister's issues messed her up way worse than mine have messed up *me*, and I freely admit I've got volumes of issues.
It’s so sad that they’re so hung-ho for boys like girls are a waste of space, and after being raised those boys will turn into pos who also don’t want daughters, and the toxic cycle continues. All these parents who value one gender over another are raising more difficult people.
Yeah I’m not having kids at all but I’d be particularly scared to have a daughter bc I live in United States and there are almost no enforceable laws against rape here. Women get raped by the police constantly and most states allow it
Where in the actual hell do you live? There are all kinds of laws against rape and women getting raped by the police all the time?? No states allow this. Now stalking laws? That's a whole different animal. In my state they have no stalking laws which is sickening.
Load More Replies...The YouTube video Tea Consent. It clearly explains how to interpret the answer given when asked if they want to have sex. A must see for teenagers, girls and guys.
I raised my daughter on my own after losing my wife to cancer when my daughter was only three. It hasn't been easy as a man raisng a daughter on my own given a lack of family support and my daughters struggles due to her autism and learning disability but would I have prefered to have a son over a daughter, nope, not at all! My daughter likes all the girl stuff I can't really help her with but she's also a PC gamer geek just like her old dad. If i had a son he might of liked football or some other boring sport and I don't care for any of that, lol.
i can't wait to introduce mine to my boring sport :). i can't imagine doing it all alone though. i now understand the "it takes a village to raise..." comment.
Load More Replies...I don't plan on having kids (especially daughter), this world is just so messed up. And in my society (which is conservative), yet they treat women harsher than men when it comes to religion things. I just don't think that i can be a good father for my kids.
every parent feels inadequate at some point. if you make your little corner of the world better it's a bit less messed up. So don't let those kind of posts even further discourage you.
Load More Replies...That guy saying “No!” to the pink balloons is a disgusting human. Gag. So gross. Daughter isn’t even born yet and she’s already set up to fail. He shouldn’t be allowed to have kids. And FYI someone being more hopeful to have a certain gender kid isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but to be negative about who your OWN CHILD is as a PERSON who you created - that’s just disgusting. 🤮
I hope to never have children, and that won't be hard for me. Because I'm scared of both the fact that if I have a daughter, she'll be harassed, or if I have a son, I won't teach him well enough and he'll be the one harassing.
if you care enough to be scared you'll do bad, it's a good start for parenting. You'll do bad some days ... but not my-son-rapes-every-girl-bad.
Load More Replies...I'm happy that I never experienced any of the things Americans seem to go through, and neither did my friends. No sexual assault, no wage gap, no being scared to walk alone at night, none of that. It must suck to live in a country that pretends to be 1st world, but is so dangerous to women.
I suspect that this issue lurks in more places than the US. That is not to the credit of the US, but it is worth remembering that we can't assume "Oh I live here, I am safe". Famous last words, y'know?
Load More Replies...I remember seeing something on here once about cats vs dogs that has stuck with me. Cats are good place to start for teaching children about the concept of consent. I have noticed a connection between men who say they HATE cats and those who simply prefer dogs and how they treat women, unless allergies are involved. Those with control and consent issues tend to detest cats.
wen me and my husband start having kids i dont care boy or girl either way they r gonna learn how to treat the opposite sex for all types of situations good or bad. i want my kids to know both respect and how to defend themselves if needed. i was in an abusive relationship i dont want a daughter of mine dealing with that or abusing the boy and i dont want a son of mine doing that or getting abused by a girl. and if they choose to like the same sex then ok ill teach them how to respect and how to not let ppl who have problems with gay or lesbian couples bother them. a parent should never hope they dont get a certain gender. they should love and raise the child properly boy or girl
the post is indeed about people who don't want a daughter. very on topic :). Any specific reason why
Load More Replies...My family has had a long line of daughters. I have 3 (kind of 4, it's a really long story) autns, and my mom had 2 daughters (but I have 4 sisters. A half sibling and a sister in-law <3), and my aunts each had at least one daughter. Two of my aunt's girls (my cousins) each had a daughter. ♀️♀️♀️
I don't want a daughter because I've gone through the stages of life and just no lol get mad at it if you want. I don't care. talk all the female garbage if you want. goes in one ear and out the other. truly. if I don't want a daughter for whatever reason im entitled to feel that way. get a life. females really be out here acting like they have it so damn hard. teach your daughter how to treat men and what to look for in a man. all this I will teach my son this and that like these bi&$hes out here are innocent. clowns on this comment section are pretty funny. I'll teach my son to not fall for women lies. cause they tell a lot. turn your cheek when they cry wolf. its a tactic. never chase them. no ones daughter is worth it. be nice and respectful but never get friend zoned.you know. real advice. not like these single moms teaching their sons to be the men they never slept with.
My son will not be one of these men. My husband is not one of these men. Raise your boys right, people. Thankful to my MIL, who raised an amazing man.
As the mother of a 13-year-old-boy, I am making sure he knows how to treat a woman. He knows about periods and respecting omen, He has stood up for girls at school when other boys act inappropriately toward them and has even walked other girls places "to be safe" I have also been teaching him that if he sees a girl (even one that he does not know) looking uncomfortable around a guy to pretend to be friends with the girl to get her out of the situation. Heck, he even did this for a gay boy he knew of but didn't really know. I would have loved to have had a daughter but I was blessed with a son. It's my job to raise him to be a gentleman and not a sexist jerk.
Lemme clear some things up for some people who might need it; one, there is nothing you can do with your son that you can't do with your daughter and two, for #notallmen people, SHE NEVER SAID ALL MEN!
I would personally like to have a son and a daughter, though it will be rough sometimes raising them in today's world. I'm prepared for that. I'm a little upset that all the reactions in the article were from women only. I would have like to see some men reacting to it. It's nice to see the men joining the conversation here.
I have friends who have daughters and, though I appreciate those girls and care a lot about them, I am so very grateful that I had two boys. No dramas. No issues. Lots in common. This girl is demonstrating why some people don't want girls and she simply can't see past herself to see the real reason why <- which is the real reason why.
To men afraid of having daughters: just be glad you have a kid at all. I'm the only child in my family and I'm female. Dad was delighted to have me after Mom miscarried twice before me. Be like them.
Looks like BoredPanda is slowly turning into DramaPanda. Sad
or "Here's 14 close ups of a woman making 14 faces so she can show off her HD make up that it took 2 hours to do. We'll put one sentence on each so you can look at something, tho"
I think everyone needs to stop focusing on raising either or, and raising OUR CHILDREN correctly. For example. Boys need to be raised to be respectful yes. Chivarly? Yes. But no one talks about their daughters. Let's talk about how many PRE-TEEN girls I see walking around dressed like they are going to a club? How about teaching our daughters respect for their own bodies before demanding respect from boys? How about teaching your sons to carry tampons / pads in their bags to come to the rescue for a girl in need and not be grossed out at a normal function? My son(s) do this. My 16 yo has already broken up with a girl or two for trying to force HIM into physical acts he's not ready for. He's also broken up with a girl after many times of her "fishing for compliments" so how about we raise our kids to learn self respect AND respect for eachother?
This post is stupid. Just because some guy worries about other men abusing his daughter if he were to have one, that does not mean he himself abused anyone.
Panda - "Men really need to open up more and talk about their thoughts and fears!" Men - "Okay, well this thing really scares me...." Panda - "No not like THAT!!! Talk about fears we agree with"
The few in this thread are all thesame men and women that complain about everything.The jaimie Lannister guy has said horrendous things about women on here and he's the biggest complainer when he or other abusive men get called out.Hey weirdos for the umpteenth time we know it's not all men but it is all women and if you're offended by this post it's bc you're the problem you know you are bc you've been told multiple times you're not nice men. Women stay away from you bc of that. If you're so completely unself aware and cannot understand that being offended by this probably bc you are this kind of man then there is no hope for you.You just want an excuse to keep abusing women and children.none of you men seem to have a problem w the fact that 98% of all women will be sexually violated in some way by the time they're 14.That's ok w you as long as your precious 1/2% of men may have to go tocourt bc of a false allegation that is what upsets not the fact that girls are violatedall the time
What about is your son grows up and gets a TIKTOK to post sexist things.
Load More Replies...Making an awareness post on social media, where people will see it and I don't know, maybe Raise Awareness? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa? The nerve of this girl! (sarcasm)
Load More Replies...To worry about his duaghters is okay. To not want daughters is what she's talkng about. Unless you don't want kidsin general then it's ok.
Load More Replies...Missndty? Bc women call out misogynistic men that's misandry wtf? Maybe you should've listened better or read what misandry is.
Load More Replies...Why, because she made a valid and proper point? Unless you've said you don't want a daughter, this doesn't apply to you, so if you're insulted, you're admitting to behaving like this.
Load More Replies...it's not about "rag on men". it's about calling out a toxic behaviour that some men do.
Load More Replies...They weren't calling out all men. They were calling out the men who throw tantrums over having a daughter. If you're insulted, you're admitting to behaving like that.
Load More Replies...It's awful strange that's all you type of men are worried about when it never happens. But you're never concerned that 98% of rapists lie about being rapists. They lie and get out of going to prison only 3% of rapists actually see a court. Only 11/2% actually see jail time. Where is the outrage? Instead you're concerned about less than 1/2% of a false accusation will end up in court. Such a piece of crap false equivalency is causing a problem for survivors of rape you claim never happen but it actually happens to a majority of women by the time theyre 14. Where's the outrage? Just say you hate women be honest for once in your miserable life
Load More Replies...
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