Boyfriend Storms Off After Girlfriend Calls Out His Fragile Masculinity For Refusing To Buy Her Pads
For the privileged part of the world, buying menstrual pads is like buying chewing gum. You don’t think twice about it, and why would you? But even here, where sanitary pads are not considered a luxury, unlike it is in many not-so-fortunate countries, some people find themselves having ambivalent feelings about buying them in public.
In fact, this is what happened to a 23-year-old woman whose boyfriend refused to buy her pads at a store because “he didn’t want the cashier to see him buying pads.” The girlfriend, who found it ridiculous and couldn’t stop laughing at that point, shared the incident on Reddit in detail, where it amassed 31.2k upvotes.
Turns out, the guy was not joking and as you can imagine, the incident escalated. It all ended with the author calling him out for fragile masculinity, and asking people online if she was right to do so. Share your thoughts in the comment section below!
After a woman got her period all of a sudden, she asked her boyfriend to buy her pads but he refused, sparking an argument between the two
Image credits: My Dream Collection (not the actual photo)
So she told her boyfriend that his masculinity was fragile and shared the whole incident on Reddit to ask people whether she was too harsh or not
Image credits: sadlyambitious
And this is what people had to say about it
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I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.
Read less »Justinas Keturka
Author, BoredPanda staff
I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.
Read more »
Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.
Read less »Liucija Adomaite
Writer, Community member
Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.
Wow that escalated. She dodged a bullet there. WTF is wrong with these guys? My teenage son would buy that stuff for me. Not without complaints, but then he does nothing without complaining first.
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He might be a c**t. It's -impossible- to tell. What's not impossible to tell is that she definitely is a c**t. She's shown us as much. But as for him, we only have this demonstrated c**t's word to go on. I reckon I know what kind of person would unquestionably sympathise and side with an absolute and undeniable c**t...
Load More Replies...This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
...some care and compassion. Instead, she opted for self-gratification at his very public expense. What an outstanding human being. And not an eye was batted by the audience. What outstanding people.
And the fact you calling women who rightfully had a darn good reason to question her relationship with a transaphobe and a idiot fear monger when it comes to women’s issues. Is extremely telling. I’m going out on a limb her and guessing you did the exact same thing this guy did and now you are outraged for the both of you because you still can’t see how wrong you both are.
Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a period! It’s not a wound, That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. Luckily before getting married or having children with him imagine how he would treat a daughter down the line or a transgender child. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy. And sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.
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What sort of a person responds to a person who she apparently cares deeply about, she might have even used the word "love", showing apprehension about doing something that could only be explained by a fear of public ridicule or judgement by laughing at them and then immediately publicly ridiculing them about the issue concerned? What sort of as person? And when this person she apparently cares about informs her of a boundary he wants respected she not only the disrespects the boundary but entirely violates it as thoroughly as can be by inviting every self-centred female on the planet to also violate the boundary? And, what sort of a person joins in on that behaviour? When you have so many people on the planet who think that because they have a c**t that it's either impossible or entirely appropriate for them to be a c**t, then what do you expect? Really, what do you expect? She could have showed some understanding and tried to get to the issue. She could have shown her "love" some...
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Just, take a step back and read the article again. Take note of the quick use of the term "fragile masculinity". Take note also of the common and frequent quick use of the "toxic masculinity". So, we're supposed to be both sensitive and strong. Take note also that this is a personal criticism. So, apparently this guy is not cooperating with this woman's wishes, and apparently that happens in a vacuum and it reflects on him alone. And she's demonstrating what kind of person she is as she tells you about her demonstrating what sort of person she is by her behaviour. And take note also that every woman on this page sees nothing at all wrong with her doing this. Can you see a problem yet?
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*sensitive and strong, and both are wrong depending on the mood of the woman.
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As the mother of a 20 year old son. I agree with a lot of what you're saying. I raised him to be sensitive and respectful but it seems like society can't decide if men should be strong or if they should be sensitive and then use it against them when they don't know what to do in a situation. I'm don't condone his transgender comments (they're gross) but it comes second hand from a pissed off pms'ing girlfriend so...
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Well, if women could refrain from constantly man-bashing and trying to shame men for everything imaginable - f****d if we do, f****d if we don't in every situation - then maybe some men might be less hesitant to do such things. Make sense?
would you buy the product if asked?? should have been a two minute conversation; he could have picked them up easy peasy.
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Why should someone do something they are uncomfortable with in public if they don't want to? She could've gone too. As a woman with horrible periods, I never run out of pads because I know that being without would be a problem. People want this guy to 'man up' but are calling him out on his toxic masculinity. If he'd asked her to do something she didn't want to do people would praise her for standing up for herself. This guy sounds like he said a bunch of stupid s**t when he felt attacked which wasn't right, but for her to throw a hissy fit because she was unprepared is also bullshit. I raised my son to be sensitive but also to stand up for himself and if he's uncomfortable doing something for someone he doesn't have to do it, just like I'm teaching my daughter. Being sensitive doesn't mean he/she has to do the bidding of others.
Sorry but did we even read the same story? She didn't ask him to "challenge" him, she asked him because she had no other option. She started her period and realized she ran out of pads. Did you read the part where she had to use toilet paper just to go outside and bought some? And i wish that your daughter would never find herself in a situation where no one is willing to help her.
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No, the reason is that an average super market has a 5 feet wall of pads of different sizes and brands and that there is not way to pick the correct ones for a guy.
What a crock of huey.... If he wanted you to pick up the condoms is that any different? Grow up, these are supplies for bodily functions... you know, like toilet paper.... By the way, you should both be relieved your period started... he sure wasn't ready for child birth....
She can tell him the right ones to get and he probably has a cell that takes pictures that he could send her to confirm it's the right one. This is a poor excuse. That guy is fragile if he can't even bother to pick up pads for his girlfriend. My dad used to hold them for me when I was a teenager and afraid people would know.
I've had menstrual emergencies before, most women do. My husband will take a photo of the exact product he needs to pick up for me because I too can bleed through pants in a matter of minutes if my period starts unexpectedly. There's nothing unmanly about helping someone in need.
Amen. I've done the picture thing myself, with my hubby, or sent him with a flap torn off the top of the box. I don't have to do that anymore, b/c we've been together so long now that he knows exactly what I need, lol, but yeah. A pic, a piece of packaging, even a phone call would solve that problem. And worst case scenario, even if he gets the wrong brand or whatever, something is always better than nothing at all. I had an ex who was too sissy to even buy his own condoms, much less pads! But he sure never missed chance to use the ones I bought us!! Just 1 of the many reasons he's an ex lol. My husband, on the other hand, will buy me midol, pads, tampons, discs, vagisil, monistat, preparation-h, nipple cream, & anything else I may need. He happily helped change our son's poopy diapers, has cleaned up puke (mine & son's lol) bandaged knees, & done anything else that was needed, to help us out. Not to mention laundry, dishes, & cooking, since I work, & he's retired. He's awesome lol. ♥️
Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a bleeding wound! That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy.
@Maria - sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.
Load More Replies...Amen could not have said that better as a matter of fact . FugggNoggin dude above needs to read that so I’m copy and pasting just for his douchbaggery.
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I mean yeah he should’ve been willing to buy it, but why is it stupid to expect her to be prepared? Even if her period came early she still knows her period was going to come eventually. You’ve never been on your period, noticed you were running low, and then bought supplies next time you went out so you’d be fully stocked for next time?
Hey, everyone! Yort here is perfect. Never run out of anything. Never has Yort gone to the store and then home to realize that they forgot to buy something. Yort doesn't make mistakes. In fact, forgetting to buy pads is worse than refusing to get pads for your girlfriend according to Yort. Yort has their priorities straight. /S
Oh ?. so you’ve never thought you had something in stock.. then you realized too late you were wrong, before? No? ...Liar!
Sometimes you have really period (2 weeks in advance). Maybe she was planning to buy some on the weekend but BAM life happened? Some women experience two periods per month. She thought she was safe until the next cycle but life happened.
Exactly men think they know everything about women’s body’s .. hell women think they know everything about women’s bodies the fact is .. we are all different what happens to one is not normal for the rest.
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No but we can be responsible and be prepared.
I had no problem buying it for my ex. The only issue being a overwhelmingly wide range of products!
You're not alone! I once spent 10 minutes looking for panty liners that didn't have some obnoxious scent, and I still made a mistake because I didn't notice the fine print... (I ordered a bunch of washable ones that day so it's actually all good)
Load More Replies...I've asked women in the store if they new what my girlfriend wanted when there was something like 'tri-wing delta shape with clips' in medium-soft. Never been disappointed by the help I got.
I do the same thing. If I don't know, I ask. Doesn't matter if it is directions or avocados. As a bonus feature, if it is wrong, it is not me that is wrong.
Agreed. The amount and variety has skyrocketed. I will have to say that , on my top inventions in the last 50 years, having self stick, thin pads has got to be up there. I remember going to the nurse as a teenager and she handed me something about 2 inches thick with safety pins to attach. Egads.
always take a picture of the exact product (if your store doesn't have a good app) and hope they don't rebrand it :)
I have taken many an empty box back to the store for repurchasing.
Lol that’s the same issue my partner has with getting pads. He always gets them for me, probably more than I even get them for myself. But he sometimes gets the wrong ones, because the choices are overwhelming and vary so much from store to store. Even the same brand can offer lots of iterations of the same product. I’m a woman and even I can get mixed up in the pad aisle sometimes.
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I even accidentally bought the wrong thing for myself once. I wouldn’t trust a guy to buy menstrual products for me. Like he should be okay with it - I mean it’s not like any cashier cares anyway - but I wouldn’t trust him.
As a male, there are some things I don't delegate to the lady of the house. My shoes are one of them, my underwear is not.
Yort, I stopped asking my husband to buy menstrual products. The first time, he buys a bathroom plug and two sheets of sandpaper. The next time, he gets me a glue stick and the Sunday edition of the New York Times. This genius has a five Master's degrees and three PhDs, none of them in buying menstrual products. I need to talk to his thesis advisor.
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Why did they censor "tricky?"
Wow that escalated. She dodged a bullet there. WTF is wrong with these guys? My teenage son would buy that stuff for me. Not without complaints, but then he does nothing without complaining first.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
He might be a c**t. It's -impossible- to tell. What's not impossible to tell is that she definitely is a c**t. She's shown us as much. But as for him, we only have this demonstrated c**t's word to go on. I reckon I know what kind of person would unquestionably sympathise and side with an absolute and undeniable c**t...
Load More Replies...This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
...some care and compassion. Instead, she opted for self-gratification at his very public expense. What an outstanding human being. And not an eye was batted by the audience. What outstanding people.
And the fact you calling women who rightfully had a darn good reason to question her relationship with a transaphobe and a idiot fear monger when it comes to women’s issues. Is extremely telling. I’m going out on a limb her and guessing you did the exact same thing this guy did and now you are outraged for the both of you because you still can’t see how wrong you both are.
Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a period! It’s not a wound, That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. Luckily before getting married or having children with him imagine how he would treat a daughter down the line or a transgender child. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy. And sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
What sort of a person responds to a person who she apparently cares deeply about, she might have even used the word "love", showing apprehension about doing something that could only be explained by a fear of public ridicule or judgement by laughing at them and then immediately publicly ridiculing them about the issue concerned? What sort of as person? And when this person she apparently cares about informs her of a boundary he wants respected she not only the disrespects the boundary but entirely violates it as thoroughly as can be by inviting every self-centred female on the planet to also violate the boundary? And, what sort of a person joins in on that behaviour? When you have so many people on the planet who think that because they have a c**t that it's either impossible or entirely appropriate for them to be a c**t, then what do you expect? Really, what do you expect? She could have showed some understanding and tried to get to the issue. She could have shown her "love" some...
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Just, take a step back and read the article again. Take note of the quick use of the term "fragile masculinity". Take note also of the common and frequent quick use of the "toxic masculinity". So, we're supposed to be both sensitive and strong. Take note also that this is a personal criticism. So, apparently this guy is not cooperating with this woman's wishes, and apparently that happens in a vacuum and it reflects on him alone. And she's demonstrating what kind of person she is as she tells you about her demonstrating what sort of person she is by her behaviour. And take note also that every woman on this page sees nothing at all wrong with her doing this. Can you see a problem yet?
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
*sensitive and strong, and both are wrong depending on the mood of the woman.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
As the mother of a 20 year old son. I agree with a lot of what you're saying. I raised him to be sensitive and respectful but it seems like society can't decide if men should be strong or if they should be sensitive and then use it against them when they don't know what to do in a situation. I'm don't condone his transgender comments (they're gross) but it comes second hand from a pissed off pms'ing girlfriend so...
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Well, if women could refrain from constantly man-bashing and trying to shame men for everything imaginable - f****d if we do, f****d if we don't in every situation - then maybe some men might be less hesitant to do such things. Make sense?
would you buy the product if asked?? should have been a two minute conversation; he could have picked them up easy peasy.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Why should someone do something they are uncomfortable with in public if they don't want to? She could've gone too. As a woman with horrible periods, I never run out of pads because I know that being without would be a problem. People want this guy to 'man up' but are calling him out on his toxic masculinity. If he'd asked her to do something she didn't want to do people would praise her for standing up for herself. This guy sounds like he said a bunch of stupid s**t when he felt attacked which wasn't right, but for her to throw a hissy fit because she was unprepared is also bullshit. I raised my son to be sensitive but also to stand up for himself and if he's uncomfortable doing something for someone he doesn't have to do it, just like I'm teaching my daughter. Being sensitive doesn't mean he/she has to do the bidding of others.
Sorry but did we even read the same story? She didn't ask him to "challenge" him, she asked him because she had no other option. She started her period and realized she ran out of pads. Did you read the part where she had to use toilet paper just to go outside and bought some? And i wish that your daughter would never find herself in a situation where no one is willing to help her.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
No, the reason is that an average super market has a 5 feet wall of pads of different sizes and brands and that there is not way to pick the correct ones for a guy.
What a crock of huey.... If he wanted you to pick up the condoms is that any different? Grow up, these are supplies for bodily functions... you know, like toilet paper.... By the way, you should both be relieved your period started... he sure wasn't ready for child birth....
She can tell him the right ones to get and he probably has a cell that takes pictures that he could send her to confirm it's the right one. This is a poor excuse. That guy is fragile if he can't even bother to pick up pads for his girlfriend. My dad used to hold them for me when I was a teenager and afraid people would know.
I've had menstrual emergencies before, most women do. My husband will take a photo of the exact product he needs to pick up for me because I too can bleed through pants in a matter of minutes if my period starts unexpectedly. There's nothing unmanly about helping someone in need.
Amen. I've done the picture thing myself, with my hubby, or sent him with a flap torn off the top of the box. I don't have to do that anymore, b/c we've been together so long now that he knows exactly what I need, lol, but yeah. A pic, a piece of packaging, even a phone call would solve that problem. And worst case scenario, even if he gets the wrong brand or whatever, something is always better than nothing at all. I had an ex who was too sissy to even buy his own condoms, much less pads! But he sure never missed chance to use the ones I bought us!! Just 1 of the many reasons he's an ex lol. My husband, on the other hand, will buy me midol, pads, tampons, discs, vagisil, monistat, preparation-h, nipple cream, & anything else I may need. He happily helped change our son's poopy diapers, has cleaned up puke (mine & son's lol) bandaged knees, & done anything else that was needed, to help us out. Not to mention laundry, dishes, & cooking, since I work, & he's retired. He's awesome lol. ♥️
Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a bleeding wound! That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy.
@Maria - sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.
Load More Replies...Amen could not have said that better as a matter of fact . FugggNoggin dude above needs to read that so I’m copy and pasting just for his douchbaggery.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I mean yeah he should’ve been willing to buy it, but why is it stupid to expect her to be prepared? Even if her period came early she still knows her period was going to come eventually. You’ve never been on your period, noticed you were running low, and then bought supplies next time you went out so you’d be fully stocked for next time?
Hey, everyone! Yort here is perfect. Never run out of anything. Never has Yort gone to the store and then home to realize that they forgot to buy something. Yort doesn't make mistakes. In fact, forgetting to buy pads is worse than refusing to get pads for your girlfriend according to Yort. Yort has their priorities straight. /S
Oh ?. so you’ve never thought you had something in stock.. then you realized too late you were wrong, before? No? ...Liar!
Sometimes you have really period (2 weeks in advance). Maybe she was planning to buy some on the weekend but BAM life happened? Some women experience two periods per month. She thought she was safe until the next cycle but life happened.
Exactly men think they know everything about women’s body’s .. hell women think they know everything about women’s bodies the fact is .. we are all different what happens to one is not normal for the rest.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
No but we can be responsible and be prepared.
I had no problem buying it for my ex. The only issue being a overwhelmingly wide range of products!
You're not alone! I once spent 10 minutes looking for panty liners that didn't have some obnoxious scent, and I still made a mistake because I didn't notice the fine print... (I ordered a bunch of washable ones that day so it's actually all good)
Load More Replies...I've asked women in the store if they new what my girlfriend wanted when there was something like 'tri-wing delta shape with clips' in medium-soft. Never been disappointed by the help I got.
I do the same thing. If I don't know, I ask. Doesn't matter if it is directions or avocados. As a bonus feature, if it is wrong, it is not me that is wrong.
Agreed. The amount and variety has skyrocketed. I will have to say that , on my top inventions in the last 50 years, having self stick, thin pads has got to be up there. I remember going to the nurse as a teenager and she handed me something about 2 inches thick with safety pins to attach. Egads.
always take a picture of the exact product (if your store doesn't have a good app) and hope they don't rebrand it :)
I have taken many an empty box back to the store for repurchasing.
Lol that’s the same issue my partner has with getting pads. He always gets them for me, probably more than I even get them for myself. But he sometimes gets the wrong ones, because the choices are overwhelming and vary so much from store to store. Even the same brand can offer lots of iterations of the same product. I’m a woman and even I can get mixed up in the pad aisle sometimes.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I even accidentally bought the wrong thing for myself once. I wouldn’t trust a guy to buy menstrual products for me. Like he should be okay with it - I mean it’s not like any cashier cares anyway - but I wouldn’t trust him.
As a male, there are some things I don't delegate to the lady of the house. My shoes are one of them, my underwear is not.
Yort, I stopped asking my husband to buy menstrual products. The first time, he buys a bathroom plug and two sheets of sandpaper. The next time, he gets me a glue stick and the Sunday edition of the New York Times. This genius has a five Master's degrees and three PhDs, none of them in buying menstrual products. I need to talk to his thesis advisor.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Why did they censor "tricky?"
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