EXACTLY. The people's comments at the end of the article are too literal and miss the entire point.

Yep. I used to cook for my ex and I, and there came a point when he would walk in - either talking in monosyllabic responses or not say anything - and make himself a plate of cheese and crackers and shut himself into our office for the rest of the evening. And when we went out to eat he would take a book. It wasn't about the food - he didn't want the time with me (and was also likely addicted to some things online). Thank goodness I figured it out and moved on to a much happier chapter of my life!

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” - Not saying OH is insane, but all in all this couple shows deeply dysfunktional patterns. I´d recommend she stopped trying to change his attitude (seems like they already tried therapy anyway) and start making choices on how to live on...

I didn't read all the answers and I'm obviously late here, but man, the disrespect ! I've had a toxic partner when it came to cooking (I left 4 years ago and the simple idea of cooking still gives me anxiety, thanks to him) and my last reaction to his abuse was exploding my dish at his feet. The situation here does not seem as bad, but I can't blame her reaction.

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Yeah it's the wife's control issues.

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Yep. This is an ESH for me. He seems to be looking at this as just about the meal so he doesn't get why she's so furious. Rather than sitting him down and telling him that she feels unappreciated when he's late to the dinner that she made after a long day at work or that she feels neglected by the fact that the intimacy of family dinner isn't important to him, or whatever other reason she may have, she just chucked the dinner in the trash. Up until that point, it seems the fight was along the lines of "We agreed to a time and you're late. Don't be late." Which just sounds like her being a bit inflexible, while he's a bit impolite. He doesn't seem to have any idea why this is important to her aside from the agreement about time. And now he's using the silent treatment. Both these kids need to learn to use their words.

I would just eat and don't wait.

This is what she needs to do. Cook for herself from now on amd evaluate if she wants to stay with a man that does not valuate her efforts.

I feel the same. Because, at our home we know that not always we are going to eat together. We barely do unless we buy takeout or go to a restaurant. For me this is a controlling thing. I still think she is not an AH. But, they both individually and together need serious therapy. But, that's me.

Not unfeeling at all, this husband is acting like a child, & OP has been acting like a parent!

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Exactly my thought when someone said he's acting like a child; the wife thinks she's the boss.

I am going to be super honest with you. My partner has OCD with the house finances and his personal ones. He constantly obsesses about the money. He can be suddenly disappear and I'm calling him. And he's like I'm sorry babe I was squaring away the budget. He obsesses over it. So, I leave him to it. He can even do that multiple times a day. If he sees some boots or something online. He wants. I'm used to it. Besides I'm not perfect either. So, people should stop anticipating the porn, the infidelities, etc... Sometimes it is not that. That's why I say both of them need individual and couple's therapy.

How about take her food and go eat in the room with him? Sit there, stare, and eat. When he asks where his food is, "its downstairs. I wanted to eat with you, so I came to join you and talk. Whatcha doin?" Guaranteed if he's doing something he doesn't want her to see? He'll be on time for dinner, especially if she makes this a habit when he's late. Which of course brings up a whole other mess of issues, but we don't know anything about the potential for those.

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Ah yes, because ignoring your SO's privacy is definitely not controlling and a trust issue. Way to go. Also: Nowhere in this article does it state that he would ever have a problem with eating alone. On the contrary, he eats alone after her meltdown. She on the other hand can't seem to function unless he eats exactly on her terms, unable to do something else until he complies.

Wow! My dad (and his dad) did the same thing! My dad disappeared (five minutes before it's ready) when I went to his house to cook dinner, then complained dinner was overcooked. I finally just started eating when it was done, and got up when I was done. I haven't made dinner for him in awhile now, because of the behavior and the nit-picking complaints....and the control issues.

Good for you! No one should have to put up with that c**p

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You're DISGUSTING. I hope to God you don't have children. Imagine a b×××× thinking a GROWN MAN should ask how high when she says jump. You proved me, and so many on this post, correct. Thank you.