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“Am I The Jerk For Watching And Not Doing Anything While My Wife Was Being Kicked Out Of My Company?”
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“Am I The Jerk For Watching And Not Doing Anything While My Wife Was Being Kicked Out Of My Company?”

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Whether we have personal experience with it or not, we all know that being in a controlling relationship is a nightmare. Unfortunately, despite the fact that nearly 40% of women have experienced coercive control from a partner, some still feel entitled to track their partner’s every move and look for reasons to pick fights. 3 weeks ago, Reddit user throwa37736 shared the story of how his wife barged into his place of work and ended up having to be removed by security for being disruptive. Below, you can read the full story, as well as some of the responses from other readers, and decide how you feel about the situation. Let us know what you think in the comments, and then if you’re looking for another Bored Panda piece featuring relationship red flags, look no further than right here.

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    3 weeks ago, one husband shared on Reddit how his wife barged into a meeting at his office just to yell at him for turning his phone off

    Image credits: RODNAE Productions (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Vanessa Garcia (not the actual photo)

    The wife caused such a scene that security had to escort her out of the building

    Each couple has their own way of handling disputes; some people immediately address issues head-on, while others want to take time to process before deciding how to handle a conflict. Whether you and your partner stay calm or become emotionally charged in arguments, it’s important to understand that there is a time and a place for those conversations. Usually, fighting in public makes a situation worse, as it may add layers of embarrassment, humiliation and resentment. According to clinical psychologist Dr. Joshua Klapow, “There is a fine line between disagreements in public — which can be healthy — and arguments or fights in public, which can ruin a relationship. The key is keeping the disagreement from escalating into the argument and keeping an argument from escalating into a fight.”

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    In the case of this particular story, the wife didn’t even allow her husband the opportunity to have a productive conversation. The way she handled this situation was toxic, as she violated a boundary and refused to wait to have a calm conversation when he got home. And this hostile confrontation is a huge sign that this wife does not know how to maintain a healthy relationship. According to Sabrina Romanoff, a therapist in New York City, “In a healthy relationship, partners have honest and non-hostile communication. While they may not be eye-to-eye on everything, they view disagreements as information about their partner, not a fight to be won.”

    Sadly, people often assume that men are the only ones who exhibit toxic behavior and signs of abuse in relationships, but that’s not the case at all. Women are equally as capable of being manipulative and controlling in relationships. For a relationship to be functioning healthily, both parties must agree to treat one another with respect, understanding and trust, things that were clearly lacking here. We’re glad that the husband did not end up losing his job, but hopefully this eye-opening incident was a turning point for him. Let us know how you feel about this situation down below and how you would respond if you were in the husband’s shoes.

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    Readers have unanimously told the husband that he did nothing wrong and warned him about the signs of abuse

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    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

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    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Author, Community member

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    Austėja is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Photography.

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    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Author, Community member

    Austėja is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Photography.

    What do you think ?
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    SillyPandaBunny
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should definitely stay with her mom. Do not let her back in the home. She’s abusive and you should file a restraining order.

    SCP-3998
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Swap the gender roles, and you would have already called the cops and had a restraining order set against any dude who did shït like this. NTA and wife is abusive with zero respect for your boundaries. Run or get therapy.

    MiriPanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Abuse. Divorce. Also weird, I never worked in an office that didn't have keycards and /or reception. No one from outside could have barged into a meeting room.

    Marco Conti
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In smaller companies is not that unusual. At least it wasn;t in the early 2K when I still worked corporate. Also in some companies if a spouse shows up, everyone assumes they are there for a good reason, not yell at their employee.

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    SillyPandaBunny
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should definitely stay with her mom. Do not let her back in the home. She’s abusive and you should file a restraining order.

    SCP-3998
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Swap the gender roles, and you would have already called the cops and had a restraining order set against any dude who did shït like this. NTA and wife is abusive with zero respect for your boundaries. Run or get therapy.

    MiriPanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Abuse. Divorce. Also weird, I never worked in an office that didn't have keycards and /or reception. No one from outside could have barged into a meeting room.

    Marco Conti
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In smaller companies is not that unusual. At least it wasn;t in the early 2K when I still worked corporate. Also in some companies if a spouse shows up, everyone assumes they are there for a good reason, not yell at their employee.

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