50 Of The Most Supportive Family Members Of LGBTQ+ Folks Right In Time For Pride Month (New Pics)

"We humans need a secure attachment to [our] caregivers and family members in order to survive and thrive," Lisa S. Larsen, PsyD, says. "Being securely attached means that we know that our caregivers are there for us against all odds, including societal rejection and oppression. When we don't have that, it is harder to handle stress and navigate the struggles that we all face."

"Unfortunately, members of the LGBTQ+ community also face minority stress, in addition to the usual challenges of daily living. When our own families reject us, ridicule us, or disrespect us, we may not know where to turn. It is a lonely experience to believe that we don't belong anywhere and that even our own family would turn [their] back[s] on us."

"LGBTQ+ youth are at greater risk for substance use, depression, anxiety, and suicide," the therapist notes. "They are very vulnerable to the pressures of political and social stigmatization and persecution. Many of my clients talk about their fear and disbelief at how risky it can be to be ‘out’ as LGBTQ+. If they also face discrimination from their own families, it creates a sense of hopelessness and helplessness."

Larsen says it's important for families to understand what it means to be LGBTQ+, accept their queer family members, and love them unconditionally. Just as they would a cisgender or heterosexual child. "Unfortunately, some ultra-religious families cannot accept their child's gender identification or sexual orientation," she says. "I have even seen young people get kicked out of their families' homes with nowhere to go."

We put a great deal of significance on the concept of family in our society. But there's also a saying "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." Sometimes, the bonds we choose might be stronger than the ones we're born into. Larsen says that while the concept of a chosen family is not specific to the LGBTQ+ community, it does apply.

"People who have been abused or neglected by their families of origin might also choose not to associate with their blood relatives or caregivers from childhood anymore. Each person gets to decide for themselves what makes sense for their mental health. If you are repeatedly dead-named or insulted because of your gender identification or sexual orientation, that can have damaging effects long-term."

"It makes sense to find people with whom you connect emotionally and to accept you the way you are, without [them] having to change you for their own comfort. The important thing is to find people who accept you the way you are and show you unconditional love; whether it's a blood relative [or] someone you have befriended or adopted along the way is unimportant," Larsen emphasizes.

However, this still doesn't diminish the fact that being rejected by family is one of the toughest things a person can go through. "It is tempting to assume that no one else will love you if your parents or other family members don't, but that is simply not true," Larsen explains. "When I think of the courage it takes to come out to family members, it's amazing that people do it. However, sometimes, family members don't know what to do with the new information, and so [they] react fearfully."

Larsen gives some possible internal coping strategies for LGBTQ+ people. First, she says, it's paramount to keep in mind that deep down, you're still the same. "Remember that you are still the same person you were before you came out, with the same strengths and challenges. Your family's rejection does not mean that you are worthless or unacceptable. Their rejection of you says more about them than it does about you," Larson tells Bored Panda.

Secondly, LGBTQ+ people should stop seeing themselves through the eyes of others. "Learn to see yourself through your own eyes," Larsen says. "Hopefully, you know your own talents, qualities, and values. Those don't change based on what other people think of you. They are enduring characteristics that you have as long as you choose to keep them. You might have to detoxify from how other people have treated you or seen you in order to find your own perspective of yourself."

Lastly, Larsen recommends finding refuge by confiding in others. "Find resources in the community where you can meet other LGBTQ+ people to connect with and, hopefully, befriend. If necessary, join a support group for those who have lost family members due to rejection."

"Allow yourself to process the grief and trauma of being rejected, but don't let it define you as a person," Larsen reiterates. "There is so much more to you than the rejection. In the community of other like-minded people, you'll be able to resurrect your self-esteem."