40 Wholesome “Green Flags” That People Noticed In Their Dates That Made Them Want To Go On Another Date
InterviewThe night I met my partner, we started chatting at a birthday party for a mutual friend and didn’t stop talking until about 6 in the morning. We both knew immediately that there was something special between us, and fast forward to 5 years later, we’re still going strong. Of course, the story is a lot more complicated than that, but sometimes, the green flags are just waving so boldly and brightly that you can't possibly deny them.
We’re all used to looking for red flags on dates, and it’s easy to come up with a laundry list of them. But what about green flags? Perhaps you realize that you’ve both been to several of the same concerts, he knows the recipe for your favorite food by heart, or you both have the same dietary preferences. Ding, ding, ding: green flags!
I hope you’re in the mood to have your hearts warmed, pandas, because down below, we’ve got some of the sweetest date stories the internet has ever heard. 2 weeks ago, Reddit user EmCWolf13 asked other users to share some of the “green flags” they’ve encountered on dates before, and they did not disappoint.
So be sure to upvote the replies that you think would make an excellent rom-com, and feel free to share your personal stories of wholesome dating experiences in the comments below. Keep reading to also find a chat we were lucky enough to have with EmCWolf13 about why she started this conversation in the first place, and then if you’d like to check out another Bored Panda article featuring green flags to look for in new relationships, look no further than right here!
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Not first date, but the moment I knew I was gonna marry this man...
We went grocery shopping. It was about 9pm, we had both just been paid. The young lady in line in front of us had a very young baby, and was paying with WIC coupons and a food stamp EBT card. Her total came to about $22, and she was holding a $20. She looked dejected, and put back the one and only thing that was probably her splurge, a candy bar and an energy drink. Other than that, she had baby food, diapers, chicken, rice, bananas, formula, wipes, the bare minimum. I turned around to tell my now-husband to hand me my wallet.
I didn't have to. He already had his out, took out a $50 bill, handed it to her and told her to keep the change. He changed her week, he changed my life. That was THE moment I knew he was it for me.
To learn more about what sparked this conversation in the first place, we reached out to Reddit user EmCWolf13. "I was inspired to ask about 'green flags' because unfortunately, typical discussions about dating and romance focus on negative events and things to avoid," she shared with Bored Panda. "I wanted to get people thinking about the happy experiences they've had, and hopefully encourage a more positive discussion."
We also asked EmCWolf13 about any green flags she has personally come across in her own dating life. "As many of the comments said, a major 'green flag' for me is when a person I'm out with is kind to waitstaff, especially if there's a delay or other circumstance that might cause someone to be snappy or rude," she shared. "Being patient and understanding are qualities I value in a partner."
He took me to an amateur stand up comedy night. He was heartily laughing at all the jokes. They were so bad. So not funny at all. I was planning to not go on another date with him because he obviously has a bad sense of humor. As we were walking to the car he commented how bad everyone was, but he wanted to encourage them so he laughed at everyone’s jokes. We’ve been married for 12 years now.
She came to my door and my puppy got excited. Without skipping a beat, she scooped up the dog & asked where **the 3 of us** were going.
That was 19 years ago. Puppy is gone but we've stuck together through hell and back.
"Another 'green flag' is when a potential partner remembers something small about me or brings up a part of our past conversations; it shows that they are paying attention to me and value our time together," EmCWolf13 shared. "For instance, my partner once brought me my favorite type of chocolate bar simply because he had seen it at a store checkout and thought of me. That sort of thing just makes me melt - pun intended!"
When my girlfriend and I had our first date her mom sent her with 50 bucks (just in case I made her pay I guess) and since I payed, she made the waiter cry by tipping him the whole 50 bucks, apparently he was having a bad day
My cat liked him and my cat didn't like anyone but me. We're still together nearly a decade later. Always trust the cat.
I was dating two guys, and my cat hissed at one and purred and cuddled with the other. I’ve now been married 22 years to the one he liked.
We were also curious what would be considered a deal breaker for EmCWolf13. "In a similar vein, a red flag for me is when a potential partner is rude to others or complains about things that aren't really a big deal - demanding better service from someone who's already trying their best, or mentioning how slow a person is walking, for example," she told Bored Panda.
"How a person treats a stranger can be a good indicator for how they will treat you and your loved ones, and if they get very easily annoyed, that puts me on edge," she noted. "A more 'shallow' red flag would be a person not making an effort to be presentable. Of course, they don't have to be wearing the latest and greatest fashion or fancy brands, but at least be clean and dress accordingly for the activity you have planned together!"
I asked if she wanted to go to MDonalds and split some fries because that’s all I could afford at the time. She said sure, we talked a long time and split a large fries and she was so chill about it. She wanted to be with me, anywhere would have been ok…. I knew if she was willing to go out with a broke and struggling me, she would also be willing to build a life with me from the ground up. We have been married 35 years, through ups and downs, kids, sickness, wealth and poverty.
That's how it's done guys! That's how to date! Dates are not there to impress each other or a down payment for sex. Dates are to get to know each other, to spend time with each other and to talk and get closer. If you don't want to go on a date, just to be with that person at that time, just to have a good time together, then you're doing it wrong
Was just laid off the week before our second date, called her to cancel, I was down and unsure about my next move, she asked me what kind of pizza I fancy, 1 hour later she's at my doorstep with pizzas and beer to cheer me up, married 12 years. Love you my bada** plumber.
We stayed at the wine bar much longer than planned, and we were trying to race to a restaurant for food before places closed. So, I offered her a piggyback ride to run it, due to her wearing heels. She jumped on, threw her arm forward and yelled "Onward!"
We didn't make it to the restaurant in time, but did end up at the nearby diner for a few more hours. Been married just passed 3 years now, and leaving for our honeymoon (FINALLY, thanks COVID), in 10 hours.
We also asked EmCWolf13 if she believes an excellent first date can be a sign that two people are meant to be together. "I think a great first date certainly goes a long way towards establishing a relationship that will last!" she shared. "It's all about being comfortable with the other person and finding someone who has a similar 'vibe' so to speak. First dates can be super awkward at times, but it's all about how you two handle anything weird that might happen. If you're both able to approach any conflicts or potential deal-breakers with compassion and understanding, you're well on your way to building a quality relationship."
On our third date we watched a movie at his place. He remembered that on our first date I ordered a Dr pepper with my meal and a chocolate chip cookie for dessert. He had Dr peppers for me in the fridge and made me home made chocolate chip cookies. He burned them but I married him two years later anyways.
I'm divorced - for many reasons, but it all can be summed up that I suffered a spinal cord injury, resulting in paraplegia, and my then-husband couldn't deal with that.
My first date with my now bf of 4+ years, he treated me like a human, not the disabled girl. It never came up in conversation, and he behaved like it didn't exist. It was so gorgeous that he (sorry for the cliche/corniness) didnt see my wheelchair. To this day, he's just never made it a deal. He understands the quirks it creates, but never ever seems bothered by any of it. In fact, he spent a serious chunk of his own change putting a ramp on his house for me. I don't think we'll ever get married (he's divorced, too, and we're both kind of jaded against the institution). But he's definitely my forever person.
On the first date with my now husband, I immediately smelled on him that he smoked cigs, which was a deal breaker for me. So I told him that. His response - then I quit.
And that was that... Ten years of addiction and he quit like it was nothing for a woman he only just met.
Later on in our relationship he told me that it was an easy decision because he felt in our first date that he had met his wife, so what was a small sacrifice like quitting smoking in exchange for me?
We also asked the Redditor if she thinks we should all be looking for "green flags" when dating, as well as red flags. "I definitely think it's important to take a step back and remember the positives when considering a potential partner," she told Bored Panda. "Of course, you don't want to totally disregard something sketchy or a clear incompatibility, but I think we as a society also need to remember that other people are just that: people, like us."
"Giving someone the benefit of the doubt, especially on a first date where they're likely nervous, can lead to opportunities you wouldn't have had if you were too quick to write the person off," EmCWolf13 explained. "Even if you decide not to pursue a relationship, you still get to learn about yourself and figure out what you need from a partner."
Two green flags from the same man .
1st : Thought he was gonna be my first casual hook up. We were both high as kites when meeting (as you do at a music festival) and the next day WHILE I DEADA** CALLED HIM A DIFFERENT NAME he had already memorized my name & difficult surname and was making plans to see me next weekend .
2nd : The first official date I had to change/reschedule as my mentally handicapped sister needed babysitting. I told him and he suggested coming over if I was OK. I thought , cool , trial by fire to see how he reacts to my sister (she is a great litmus test to see of people are decent or not). He comes over, was a bit awkward and then totally just bonded with her , took my ques and learned how to speak to her and what she was comfortable with.
We are now 8 years together , 5 years married , 3 cute pets , a new house in an awesome country and trying for a baby:D . Life is good and he is my everything...... still call him the different name occasionally just for fun though XD .
We met up for park beers on our first date. From the get go, things just felt natural. The conversation flowed, we laughed, and it felt more like meeting with an old friend than a first date. When it got dark, she brought me back to hers to meet her cat (no innuendo, we waited a few dates to bang, and I just really love cats.) We didn't plan to, but we met up the next day. And the next. Took her to a family BBQ two weeks in, and they loved her. That easy, natural feeling never left. And right now her cat (now our cat) is screaming at me for dinner.
Took her out for coffee. We ended up staying for lunch, and then getting dinner. We talked for eleven hours. We've been married twelve years. We can still talk for hours.
"Overall, I think it's beneficial to look for the 'green flags' when dating, as well as throughout daily life," EmCWolf13 shared. "There's so much good in the world, but unfortunately, we're wired to focus on the negatives (thanks, evolution). Consciously looking for positive situations and good qualities in others is a great way to improve your mood and outlook on life. As Mr. Rogers said, 'Look for the helpers. They're always there.'"
I have a son from my previous marriage. At dinner I told him flat out my son will always be my first priority and if he couldn’t handle that then there was no point wasting each other’s time, that my son had a damn good dad so I didn’t want a dad for my son but if we ever got serious enough for me to let him into my son’s life my expectations of him would be to be positive influence, a mentor and someone my son could count on to support him and love him. There would be times where I would be busy doing mom things like taking care of a sick kiddo, a babysitter canceled, there’s a game or school event I needed to be at, homework I needed to stay home and help with, etc and if he couldn’t understand and accept that there was no place for him in my life. He just looked at me and said that’s what a good mom does and it shouldn’t be any other way.
He told me later he knew at that moment on our first date I was the woman he was going to marry and he vowed to make sure we never went without anything as long as he was in our lives. Here we are almost 10 years later married for almost 8. He loves my son as much as I do, he would do anything in the world for us and I don’t doubt he would die for either one of us.
How I knew he was the one was when I was sicker than a dog, I literally couldn’t get out of bed. We had only been casually dating for about 6 weeks but he came over with pizza, chicken noodle soup, ginger ale, tea, honey, lemons and some video games. He fed my son pizza and me soup, made me tea, held my hair while I projectile vomited all over my bathroom, cleaned up my mess, put me to bed, played video games with my son, got him to bed, got him up for school, made breakfast and a lunch for him, dropped him off at school and then called out of work to take care of me. He cleaned my house, did my dishes, did my laundry, changed the sheets on my bed while I took a shower and stayed cuddled up on the couch with my sick a*s all day, then met my son at the bus stop and made us dinner. My son looked at me and said mommy I like your friend, can he stay here more? I fell in love with him that day. The way he cared about my son and about me and how he jumped in to help with no expectations just wanting to make sure I was taken care of and my son was safe and taken care of. We got engaged a year later and married a year after that. My son is 16 now and my husband is his best friend still. They love each other so much and they are always together, he’s at all my son’s games, he helps with homework, he plays video games with him, he takes him fishing and camping, taught him how to drive, he treats my son like his own child and the bond they have is incredible.
Wasn't our first date.......but I only had a few dates with someone I was dating rather long distance. I was stationed on Sardegna, and she lived in Liguira, so just to have a date, required ferries and long train rides, and sometimes short flights....which were always a hassle.,.....but we tried to make it work. My ship would go to Toulon, France, or Naples, Italy, and we'd tried to meet up , even if only for a few hours.
On our 4th or 5th date.......my ship was going to Livorno, so we agreed to try to meet up in Pisa. Seemed like a plan, and doable. But right before leaving, I felt terrible..... but thought maybe it would pass. It didn't..........the train ride was insufferable, I was burning with fever.....chills, the whole 9 yards......and all I remember was pulling into Pisa, and there she was, on the platform, waiting for my train. I stepped off the train, and literally just passed out in her arms. I mean, out cold.
I woke up in a hotel bed.....and she was sitting there, holding a cup of tea for me.
and I was like, what the hell happened?
Apparently, right after I passed out, she grabbed a taxi driver, and together they dragged me across the street to the nearest hotel, she got a room, and put me to bed. And then just sat there, all night watching me.
I have no memory of any of that. I just woke up in a bed, with her holding a cup of tea...........because she saw that I was starting to stir,........so she went to get me a cup of tea.
I just remember thinking............damn, I need to marry this woman.
and I did.
and that was the last cup of tea the damn woman ever made me.
Random dance at a club. She held my hand after it ended. We were married 24 years before she passed due to cancer.
We hope you're enjoying this heartwarming list, dear pandas. Remember never to settle when dating, and keep a close eye out for those green flags. We would love to hear the green flags that made you swoon when you first met your partner in the comments down below, and then if you're interested in reading another article highlighting gorgeous green flags to search for when in a new relationship, you can find that right here!
Pretty cool story.
First date with my now wife. Had plans to go to a fancy Italian restaurant. I show up a bit early, dressed as nice as my wardrobe allows, a couple drinks before she gets there.
But anyway she arrives and we enjoy dinner, drinks, appetizers, dessert. The works.
Anyway when it’s time for thee check the waitress comes over and says “a person who prefers to remain anonymous picked up yalls tab and told me to tell y’all to continue to enjoy the night.”
We were both shocked. I wasn’t keeping tabs but this was an expensive meal we just had. I tipped well of course and I thought to myself the only reason anyway would do that is they say an obvious first date unfolding and thought we were cute/happy/genuine or something.
We both felt pretty special. Been married for 3 years. Together for 8. We eventually paid it forward to another young couple years later.
Total boss move btw. Definitely feel good about yourself.
On our first date, our conversation was natural enough that the waitress asked us how long we had been married. The answer is 20 years now.
This happened to my husband and I too and it was a blind date. The waitress was genuinely shocked
Among other things we talked about books, and at some point I asked for some recommendations. He said he had to think about it, but I didn't expect him to actually do.
The next day he texted me a list of his favorite books, showing that he had been really thinking about me and that he didn't care about those weird texting rules (that you shouldn't text the day after a date so you won't seem too eager)
Also just the fact that he wanted to talk about books
He asked permission to give me a hug. Second date he asked permission to kiss me. We've been married 7 years now.
First date, she was driving us to a spot to go hiking, about an hour’s drive. We’re talking and talking, but every once in a while we wouldn’t be talking, and it just felt so comfortable and not awkward being silent together.
Current husband of 20 years canceled first date about 30 minutes before because there was a very slim possibility that he might get an unexpected couple of hours with his daughters that night (divorced with two daughters).
Didn't know you yet, and showed how he values the people important to him.
He farted, looked me dead in the eyes, and said "erase the stigma".
We are currently engaged and have been together for 6 years.
We had been dating about 6 months and she showed up at my apartment with a homemade cake on my birthday. It might sound like no big deal to some people but I had never dated a girl who cared about my birthday. I almost dropped to my knees and cried when I opened the door.
She stopped at GameStop on the way over to grab another wii controller so that my roommate could play Super Mario 3D world with us on the wii-u she was bringing with her.
That was almost 8 years ago : )
She listened to what I said and also contributed to the conversation. Was the first time I found a girl who did that and five years later as of today were still going strong. A week from now if I’m lucky she’ll say yes and she’ll go from an amazing gf to fiance
The date was supposed to just be getting a drink or two. We stayed until the place was closing down and even then the date wasn’t over- we watched Donnie Darko and he made us cookies. We’ve been together for almost 10 years and married for 5.
Everyone should have someone they’re unwilling to say goodbye to.
Not a first date, but about maybe two weeks into seeing each other. He saw a friend of mine for the first time that night and we had fun. However, I began crying in front of him and my friend because someone I used to date messaged me telling me he doesn't need me anymore and that me setting him up with someone proves he can easily move on from me and that I'm nothing but the past and I don't mean anything.
This guy I barely knew at that time sat me down, gave me some blankets, and told me I'm not going to entertain or host anything until he knows I feel better. He then tried making me some hot cocoa but couldn't figure out the Keurig, so I laughed/cried as I showed him how to do it. My friend told him it was the nicest thing anyone ever did for me, and he was deeply confused because, "this is the bare minimum for someone to do, what are you talking about?"
And we're engaged now 8 years later.
She saw a hummingbird start to circle some flowers on the patio we were dining on and had to pause the conversation to just watch the little guy.
Relatable : I was distracted by a butterfly once, she preferred her phone. No second date ofc.
Went on a first date with a girl, check came and I tried to grab it and she said, "if you pay for the whole thing there won't be a second date, if we split it ill see you next weekend" smoooooth
He made it clear it was a date and that he was interested without it ever feeling creepy or like he was pressuring me for anything. We talked for hours, went from restaurant to walking up and down the river to my place for a beer, then I offered for him to stay over but on a mattress on the floor (I was in a studio with no couch), not in my bed and he wasn’t pushy about anything more happening.
The first few weeks he was always sweet and respectful but made it so clear that he was interested in a relationship, no back and forth or second guessing. And now we’re married!
She told me to! She said, "See? Was that so bad? Now ask me out for another."
Wifey and I met in the Marine Corps. I was a Sgt, she was a PFC. I was busy working on my career, she was there for the GI Bill. We started running together and finally one day, after a couple of months, she yelled at me, "ARE YOU EVER GOING TO ASK ME OUT???"
He asked if it was okay if he checked his phone as he left work to meet up with me, but still had things in flight he needed to pay attention to. I appreciated he valued his time with me but also wanted to be present for his team. Even now, two years later, he still asks.
We had so much fun. Laughed the whole time. At the end he bought silly string and we chased each other around a parking lot with it like we were the only people on the planet
walking her home, she accidentally stepped on a snail. she felt really bad about it.
almost married her right there.
The banter and chemistry was instantaneous. 32 years later and three kids later, the banter and chemistry is still there.
A two hour date that felt like five minutes. At the end of it she made some silly bet with me that she said if she lost, she’d go out with me again. And of course she lost.
It was about eight green flags
We went to a fairly fancy place, and I have the palete of a 5yr old. I can typically find something anywhere but I was going through the menu and there is basically nothing I can make remotely edible for me. But they have Mac and cheese. We're in our early thirties, and we're at a fancy place. There's no way I can order Mac and cheese and not look like a toddler.
The waiter comes around, I am basically having a panic attack in my head, I let her order first.
She orders the Mac and cheese.
OMFG
I order the Mac and cheese too.
We go and see a live jazz show. We're leaving and it had snowed while we were in the show.
I don't remember how it came up, but I made some joke about doing donuts in the parking lot and to my extreme surprise she said something along the lines of "hell yeah, I've never done donuts in a parking lot".
I put the Forester through it's paces. Turned traction control off and got the side widows coated in snow. She was laughing like a school girl the entire time.
We hung out a few more times and parted ways as friends. There was a significant class difference. She was staying in her parents multi-million dollar home *on* the ocean, and my parents will die destitute.
stories like really bring out the loneliness bro 😭😭 single pandas unite 😿😿- jokes aside, this was super heartwarming and i shall now go to sleep peacefully 😌
My parents are married 14 years. Almost every night they sit down together and just play games, not on their phones just play games. And I’ll let them do their own thing cause they’ll tell me to play with them but I want it to be a ‘them’ thing I want it to be a special tradition just between them p. They still don’t know this and continue to play the game. I love seeing this.
You're a good kid. Warms my heart to see such kindness from a child to their parents.
Load More Replies...Our first date was a day thing and was going swimmingly but as night came I had to leave to go to a family bbq. Not wanting the date to end I invited him along kind of as a joke since obviously ‘come meet my entire family on our first date’ is more than a bit weird. But to my surprise he said sure and off we went to a great party where he fit right in. Everyone liked him and he still fits right in.
Still got him? So ... you went to adopt a water-liking dog or something?
Load More Replies...stories like really bring out the loneliness bro 😭😭 single pandas unite 😿😿- jokes aside, this was super heartwarming and i shall now go to sleep peacefully 😌
My parents are married 14 years. Almost every night they sit down together and just play games, not on their phones just play games. And I’ll let them do their own thing cause they’ll tell me to play with them but I want it to be a ‘them’ thing I want it to be a special tradition just between them p. They still don’t know this and continue to play the game. I love seeing this.
You're a good kid. Warms my heart to see such kindness from a child to their parents.
Load More Replies...Our first date was a day thing and was going swimmingly but as night came I had to leave to go to a family bbq. Not wanting the date to end I invited him along kind of as a joke since obviously ‘come meet my entire family on our first date’ is more than a bit weird. But to my surprise he said sure and off we went to a great party where he fit right in. Everyone liked him and he still fits right in.
Still got him? So ... you went to adopt a water-liking dog or something?
Load More Replies...