When asked about the most rewarding part of being a dad, Paul joked, saying, “By far, when my kids laugh at my dad jokes.” He and another fellow father, John, went searching for resources when they became new dads, and what they found were hundreds of mommy blogs. In the end, they were able to find some of the dad blogs too, but there was nothing that appealed to them. 

With their company, Fathercraft, they guide parents with trusted sources that help them through their journey. “While we create with dads in mind, our readers include moms, aunts, uncles, and grandparents,” their website reads. 

On a more serious note, the most rewarding thing for him was watching his kids learn to solve problems and use skills they gradually picked up through life to do something new. “Maybe a few of those came from me, but what's really amazing is watching how their brain can combine life experiences and lessons to do something new.”

“When my son was younger, I loved getting to share the things I’m passionate about and seeing them with a new perspective through his eyes,” shares Brent, aka Designer Daddy. “Now that he’s a teenager, it’s such a joy to see what he’s become passionate about, and getting to experience those things with him.”

Brent is a husband, a stay-at-home dad raising an adopted son, and writing about his life and LGBTQ issues in general. Professionally, he is nearing the third decade of being a graphic designer and illustrator. The combination of the two resulted in the Designer Daddy blog, which is full of color and creativity.

There’s no denying that parenthood is a life-changing experience, and Brent completely agrees. “If anyone tells you becoming a parent didn’t change them, they’re lying!” he exclaims. “For me, it heightened every one of my emotions and personality traits (both good and bad). Joy, anger, pride, sadness, worry, and excitement — all were amplified when I became responsible for this little human.”

Meanwhile, Paul thinks of himself as the same guy he was before, only with more perspective on what matters and shifted priorities. “I'm someone who likes to work, and my job means a lot to me.

It still does, and I still log time on my computer when the kids are asleep, but it's amazing when you come home after a hard day and work and interacting with your kids makes you realize — they don't care that I feel like I screwed up doing blah blah at work today... they want me to be their dad and play with them and make mac 'n cheese. That's good for setting my brain straight,” he shares. 

To anyone who is preparing to be a first-time dad, Brent recommends doing research in whatever way works for them so they’re not going into it blind. It could be reading books, listening to podcasts, or talking to friends and family. “But then don’t overthink it — because you’ll freak yourself out. Your instincts will kick in, and you’ll do great!” he reassures. 

Paul seconds this by saying, “A little dad education can go a long way in making you more confident, which in turn can make this whole parenting thing feel a little bit easier and a lot more rewarding. 

There are a ton of great resources out there. Go to your local bookstore and find a book on being a dad that speaks to you. Cruise YouTube and look for baby product reviews that make you realize some of these baby gadgets are kinda cool, or talk to a friend who had a kid a bit older than yours. You might learn something, and it might help you enjoy the journey (even more).”

Even though Paul mentions that fatherhood will probably always be challenging, it’s important to pause and reflect. Yes, even when you’re lacking sleep and can’t figure out how to calm the baby or when the big kid figures out how to drag out the bedtime by an extra 30 minutes.

“It's all worth it,” he says. “I try to remember that even 2 minutes can make a difference in the lives of my kids… If I'm willing to step away from what I'm doing to push them on the swing or get a tour of the block house they made ... or heck, even snuggle up and watch a 7-minute-long Bluey episode together ... those things matter.”

Brent signed off by highlighting the importance of having a support system for fathers. "Society is better set up for moms to network, socialize, and support one another.

A lot of fathers feel isolated and can suffer both mentally and physically as a result. Take care of yourself by seeking friends, mentors, relatives, therapists, or support groups (in person or online) to help share the burden and offer encouragement."