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50 Of The Best “What’s The Difference Between” Jokes The Internet Has To Offer
Everyone loves good jokes. They can elevate your mood and brighten up your day when life is not going exactly the way you planned. You might not realize it, but jokes can also be divided into genres. From slapstick comedy to sarcasm to more subtle humor, there are so many different ways to make funny jokes.
What you will find funny in a moment solely depends on your character and the mood you are in. Sometimes, even the most awkward of dad jokes that would make you facepalm in any other situation can make you laugh out loud.
While some types of jokes are universally loved, there are others that are not everyone’s cup of tea. For example, dark humor jokes may be frowned upon, and if morbid humor is your go-to strategy to make someone laugh, people might start giving you side glances. That’s why it would be advisable to be a little cautious and make sure your jokes aren’t hurting anyone.
Delivery is extremely important. Even the best pun jokes will fall flat if you don’t tell them right. This is the reason why some people make fantastic stand-up or movie comedians, while others can hardly squeeze a chuckle out of their audience.
For this article, we collected a lot of “what’s the difference between” jokes. But since there can never be enough jokes, make sure you share your favorite ones in the comments below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
What’s the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins, “Once upon a time…”. A southern fairytale begins, “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this…”
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#2
What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I don’t know and I don’t care.
#3
What’s the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?
An amateur thief says, “Give me all your money!”. A professional thief says, “Sign here please.”
Colin Timp 2 years ago
Like Bill Burr said, What's the difference between banking and loan sharking? The only difference is that a loan shark will break your legs. The bank doesn't have to because what they do is legal.
#4
What’s the difference between the mafia and the government?
One of them is organized.
#5
What’s the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man?
Iron Man stops the bad guy, Aluminum Man foils their plans.
#6
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
#7
What’s the difference between ice cream and your advice?
I asked for the ice cream.
#8
What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo & Juliet?
One’s a Coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.
#9
What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?
The letter F.
#10
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
#11
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
#12
What’s the difference between communism and a pencil?
The pencil works on things other than paper.
#13
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.
#14
What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?
The people in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones but the people in Abu Dhabi doooooo.
#15
What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?
February 14th.
#16
What's the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
Their seasoning.
#17
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
#18
What’s the difference between democracy and feudalism?
With feudalism, it’s your count that votes.
#19
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
You’ll see one later and one in a while.
#20
What is the difference between an atheistic shop and a religious shop?
An atheistic shop is non-prophet.
#21
What’s the difference between a musician and a large pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four.
#22
What’s the difference between mitosis and escaping prison?
Nothing; they both require splitting from cells.
#23
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
#24
What’s the difference between an envelope and a window?
Nobody looks at you funny when you lick an envelope.
#25
What’s the difference between love and marriage?
Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener.
#26
What’s the difference between a bowl of moldy lettuce and a depressing song?
One is a bad salad, and the other is a sad ballad.
#27
What’s the difference between a teacher and a cynic?
A teacher answers your questions; a cynic questions your answers.
#28
What’s the difference between the winner of a bodybuilding competition and a couch potato?
One has a trophy for muscles and the other has muscle atrophy.
#29
What is the difference between learning sign language and learning to speak English?
One is pretty handy.
#30
What’s the difference between an Indian restaurant and a Vietnamese restaurant?
Indian places are naan profit, Vietnamese places are pho profit.
#31
What’s the difference between a museum and Mordor?
One does not simply walk into Mordor.
#32
What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke?
The direction the first letter faces.
#33
What’s the difference between a good night and a great night?
How you tell the story the next morning.
#34
What’s the difference between a booger and broccoli?
Kids won’t eat broccoli.
#35
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
#36
What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other an oinkment.
#37
What is the difference between standing in the rain and standing in the shower?
The water bill.
#38
What is the difference between a kleptomaniac and an actor?
A kleptomaniac takes things literally.
#39
What is the difference between studying Geology and studying English?
Studying Geology rocks.
#40
What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
You can roast beef, but you can’t pee soup.
#41
What’s the difference between a man with an unnaturally high voice and one with unnatural teeth?
One has a falsetto voice, the other has a false set o’ teeth.
#42
What’s the difference between humans and frogs?
Humans croak once, but frogs croak all the time.
#43
What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
Christof Irran 2 years ago
A nurse goes to the bank to cash a check, and rummages through her purse for a pen. She thought she found one, but instead what she pulled out was a rectal thermometer. "Great!" she says, " That's just great! Some @sshole's got my pen."
#44
What’s the difference between a good idea and a bad idea?
Your opinion.
#45
What’s the difference between a man and a computer?
You only have to tell a computer to do something once.
#46
What’s the difference between a greedy person and a shrimp?
One is selfish; the other is shellfish.
#47
What’s the difference between a piano and a tuna?
You can tuna piano, but you can’t piano a tuna.
#48
What is the difference between baseball and law?
In baseball, if you’re caught stealing, you’re out.
#49
What is the difference between the old plastic straws and the new paper straws?
Plastic straws suck.
Chris Cristo 2 years ago
And paper straws come in plastic packages. Why can't we just drink from the cup? Sucking stuff must be very enjoyable for some people I guess
#50
What’s the difference between the first three letters of the alphabet and a rare blood type?
One is ABC; the other is AB, see?
What do you think ?
The Queen Of Upper Butt Crack 2 years ago
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws ? Outlaws are wanted.
Patti Vance 2 years ago
while in physical therapy doing something that i didn't think i could do my therapist: what is the difference between a terrorist and a physical therapist? you can negotiate with a terrorist.
Antony Fossard 2 years ago
What's the difference between a circus and a brothel? One is a cunning bunch of stunts...
Rob Williams 2 years ago
This works best in a Scots accent… What's the difference between Frank Sinatra and Walt Disney? Frank sings and Walt disnae!
yepyepyepuhhuh 2 years ago
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches...
Frank Ropen 2 years ago
What's the difference between a toilet bowl and a tube? I don't know. So it was you!
Freya the Wanderer 2 years ago
What's the difference between a boxer and a man with a cold? One blows his nose and the other knows his blows.
The Queen Of Upper Butt Crack 2 years ago
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws ? Outlaws are wanted.
Patti Vance 2 years ago
while in physical therapy doing something that i didn't think i could do my therapist: what is the difference between a terrorist and a physical therapist? you can negotiate with a terrorist.
Antony Fossard 2 years ago
What's the difference between a circus and a brothel? One is a cunning bunch of stunts...
Rob Williams 2 years ago
This works best in a Scots accent… What's the difference between Frank Sinatra and Walt Disney? Frank sings and Walt disnae!
yepyepyepuhhuh 2 years ago
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches...
Frank Ropen 2 years ago
What's the difference between a toilet bowl and a tube? I don't know. So it was you!
Freya the Wanderer 2 years ago
What's the difference between a boxer and a man with a cold? One blows his nose and the other knows his blows.
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