I have no idea if pick-up lines are coming back, 'cause I am a teenager and the amount of pick-up lines I have heard is astronomical. I would love to hear your hilariously cringe stories.

P.S. If you are a guy reading this, DO NOT try to use these. They have already failed once.

#1

Are you Mcdonalds? Cause you're going straight to my thighs

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#2

If I were a squirrel and you were a tree, I'd put my nut in your hole.

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#3

#1 Guy: Your eyes are like diamonds.
Me: And you are such a treasure I want to bury you.

#2 Guy: You’re the ketchup to my burger. The frosting to my cupcake. The candy to my Halloween. Basically, you complete me.
Me: Aw, and you’re the jelly to my burger. The knife to my soup. The glitter to my sushi. And the ketchup to my ice cream. Basically, you’re worthless.

#3 Guy: You’re the reason we have labels that read “Warning: HOT”
Me: You’re the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo.

#4 Guy: Where you made by Leonardo DaVinci cause you’re a masterpiece,
Me: And you look like something I drew with my left hand.

This is my favorite
#5 Guy: How do you like your coffee?
Me: I like it like myself, “Dark, Bittersweet and too hot for you.”

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Flare
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh, roast me! "Will you be my player two?" (NOT actually flirting with you)

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#4

"if you were a booger I would pick you first" after he said that I just slowly walked away. also, someone was hitting on my friend and she didn't like him at all so when he said the stupid line "did you hit your head when you fell from heaven" she said, "no, but I scraped my knee coming out of hell". it was funny to see the look on the guy's face after that.

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#5

i've mcfallen for you

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#7

I'm so bad at them I can make some up on the spot:

Are you a nurse? Cause you need to do some necessary work to my heart.
*Badum-tss*
Is it Christmas already? Cause you're present.
*Badum-tss*
How many pick-up lines does it take to screw a light bulb? Less than to screw someone.
*Badum-tss*

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#8

1. "Go ahead, feel my shirt. It's made of boyfriend material!"
2. "Are you Siri? Because you autocomplete me!"
3. "If you were a burger at McDonald's, you'd be named the McGorgeous!"

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#9

Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for.

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#10

Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean. And I don't mind being lost at sea,
You must be a campfire. Because you're super hot and I want s'more.
I'm no mathematician, but I'm pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, give me yours and watch what I can do with it.
Kiss me if I'm wrong. But dinosaurs still exist, right?

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TheGayPandas
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That is when you say to the last one "I would be glad to kiss you! Oh, did I say kiss? I meant punch."

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#11

Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you got fine written all over you'

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#12

• I am going to have to report you to Spotify, because it doesn't show you in the Hottest Singles this week
• Can you help me w/ a math problem? X+U=25
X must be 15, cause U sure are a 10

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#13

some guy (now ex lmfao dont ask) once said to me: "if your right leg was dinner, and your left leg was lunch, i couldn't resist snacking between meals." oh god im glad i broke up with him smh.

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#14

i am a teenager and i do cringe pick up lines with my gf heres one
gf-i need animae to survive
me-i just need you
gf-.....you need to stop

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#15

'Are you telekinetic, cause you've made a part of me move without touching it."

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#16

Him: Did it hurt?
My friend (female): Not this again...
Him: When I fell for you?
Her: *kicks his groin* Did it hurt? When you fell for me?

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#17

My dad back when he was a “player” actually said this to a human being...and they fell for it..

*points to himself* “peanut butter”
*points to the girl of interest* “jelly“
“Let’s make a sandwich”
*proceeds to her place*

My%20father%20who%20I%20can’t%20believe%20my%20mom%20married%20 Report

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GALAUNA BULLARD
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Intoresting XD and I now I spelled it wrong that’s how I talk -~-

#18

Stranger told my friend this: "Did you fart because you blew me away". We backed away and made an escape...

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#19

"Have you heard about Pluto? That's messed up right?"

If you know what this is from, we are officially friends.

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#20

(minecraft one) Hey are you a furnace? because you make my heart melt..and you're so hot

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#21

Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together.
If you were a Transformer… you’d be Optimus Fine.
If you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.
Is this the Hogwarts Express? Because it feels like you and I are headed somewhere magical.
I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!
If I had four quarters to give to the four prettiest women in the world, you would have a dollar!

i didn't know how many to put but here they are and the last one, I want a bf. And by “bf” I mean a Benjamin Franklin as in a 100 dollar bill, boy.

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#22

One of my ex's said this to meh~ You just turned my software into a hardware ;)

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#23

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

I want our love to be like the number Pi: irrational and neverending.

Don't tell me if you want me to take you out to dinner. Just smile for yes, or do a backflip/somersault/counter-spin gymnastics combination for no.

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#24

Your father must have been a thief ...
He stole two stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

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UNEXPLAINABLE
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a slight chance that it would not work because what if her father was a thief and had to go to jail. It might remind her and cause her to have a mental breakdown.

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#25

There was this one kid at school who'd always try to hit on me, and once he said this:

Him: Hey, go out with me
Me: No.
Him: Just blink to say yes, spin 5 times in a row without falling.

And me being me, I spun in a circle and kicked him in his groin in the process 5 times.

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#26

1. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'I' and 'U' together.
2.You must be exhausted. You've been running through my mind all day.
3.I think you're suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

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#27

Oh god. Okay.

There’s a scene in animaniacs where yakko is talking to Hello Nurse and he’s like “How do you do! (That thing with your mouth?)”

It makes me very uncomfortable, for obvious reasons, but also because he is fifteen years old and hello nurse is an adult woman... it’s gross.

And please, please never watch Rob Paulsen making dirty jokes in yakko’s voice. Childhood ruined.

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Ziva Kravdahl
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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#28

There's one quite popular (and cringy) in Russia:
- Does your mom need a son-in-law?

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#29

Not really a line... but a act...
This is from a YT video btw.
Guy walks up to someone. says, can you hold this for a sec, i need to tie my shoe-holds out fist.
PERSON: sure-hold out hand.
GUY: puts hand on other hand. asks, that was smooth right?
:///

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#30

random guy: Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk by again?
Me:Go ahead. I need to practice hitting a moving target.

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