Someone Asks Moms “What Do You Actually Want For Mother’s Day” And 30 Deliver Honest Responses
Mother’s Day is right around the corner—and that’s true no matter what corner of the world you live in. It’s one of the quirks of humankind that different countries mark the celebration on different dates. However, that only highlights the importance of treating our moms with love, care, and respect throughout the year, not just once a year.
Redditor u/zxkool started a viral discussion on r/AskReddit after asking the moms who use the platform about what they actually want for Mother’s Day. Their answers were extremely enlightening, and we’ve collected the most insightful ones to share with you. Scroll down for their open and honest posts.
Parenting blogger Samantha Scroggin, who runs the wonderfully witty Walking Outside in Slippers page, was kind enough to share her thoughts with Bored Panda on what moms would appreciate the most on Mother's Day. Check out Samantha's awesome insights below!
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I had a miscarriage because my medical care providers refused to listen to me. My uterus pressed on the lines to my bladder and gave me an infection (really simple and common thing to happen durring pregnancy its completely treatable and should never be more than a mild inconvenience) I went septic and we almost died together.
What I want for mother's day is for women and especially women of color to stop receiving medical care worse than that of a third world country.
If I get a second request it would be universal healthcare. I'm over 16000 in debt for someone who attempted to kill me and my child. This is insane and I have no way of paying it. Even if I did why would I want to? Everytime I receive a bill it makes me break down in tears in a combination of "I lost my baby" and "I can't afford this"
Bored Panda was interested to find out what any mom's family members can do to make Mother's Day extra special. Blogger Samantha told us what moms appreciate the most on this day. (We hope you're all taking notes!)
"Speaking for myself at least and hearing from other moms I've talked to on the topic of Mother's Day, we really just want to be shown appreciation for all we do and are," she opened up to us.
"Hand-made cards from my kids and coupons to help me with chores are at least as welcome as store-bought gifts," Samantha said.
"My husband has helped the kids make me breakfast in bed, and that was thoughtful and adorable. Bonus points if Mom doesn't have to clean up her own breakfast in bed!"
A clean house, a long nap, and to not have to see my mother-in-law this year. It always turns into her day but hi, I'm a mom too.
Not sure why the husband can't go out to take mother-in-law out for brunch or something and let OP stay home and enjoy a nap.
I want to spend the whole day with my 2 year old somewhere fun for two year olds.
I’ve been so poor for so long that my one mom wish is having the $20 or whatever and an Uber to take him to one of those awesome toddler playgrounds.
I know it’s dumb, but seeing his face every time he gets to have a new awesome experience (like swimming, or the egg hunt I did for him last week) he gets this expression, like the sun just came up for the first time.
I’d go pluck the moon for him to play with if I could.
But hey, I just started a job and I might get paid just in time for Mother’s Day.
My mom is dead, but what I wish I did with her is take her for new experiences. I used to do the “buy mom a maid service” thing, or buy mom flowers, but I wish I had taken her for flying lessons or cooking classes or some memory like that.
Call your moms, people. Go do things with them. I didn’t think I’d lose mine by 25, and it happened so fast.
Edit: I think Reddit might have done it again! If it all works out I’m going to take us to the toddler playground AND the aquarium. His little mind’s going to be blown; I’m so happy :)
How do I find this mom to send her money so she can do this once a month?
We all know that we should show our moms how much we appreciate and care about them throughout the year, not just on a single day once a year. However, we all sometimes need gentle reminders... as well as creative ideas on how to show our love. Samantha shared a few spot-on thoughts on how everyone can do this.
"Words and hugs go a long way for me towards showing appreciation," the founder of the Walking Outside in Slippers blog told Bored Panda.
"Hearing 'I love you' from my kids never loses its luster. That said, I always welcome kids doing their chores without whining and complaining," she said.
"And spouses or partners showing gratitude and appreciation is so important as well."
Debbie Downer here, but as a mom to a recently stillborn son all I want is to be acknowledged as a real mother.
Edit: oh wow, thank you all so so much... feeling like a mom after loss is something I struggle with a lot and I know I’m not going to be the only mom without a baby in her arms this Mother’s Day. If there’s anyone in your life in my shoes I encourage you to reach out with the same love and support you’ve shown me as this may be a very tough time of year for them.
I actually want my husband's cancer to vanish so we can continue enjoying our family and each other. I'm so scared of losing him.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Stay strong and good luck <3
A large spliff. An afternoon alone with the dog on a forest trail. A steak dinner and a bath with a movie in a clean house.
I’m a simple woman LOL.
The fact remains that moms and working women still aren’t as respected as they should be. Unfortunately, there is an unwritten expectation, even in the West, that women will tackle the majority of the housework and even the chores in the office. CNN recently reported on how wives who earn as much as their husbands or more still end up spending far more time on housework and childcare.
“Even as financial contributions have become more equal in marriages, the way couples divide their time between paid work and home life remains unbalanced,” the Pew Research Center, which conducted the study, pointed out. Researchers found that in 29% of heterosexual marriages, women and men earn around the same amount of money, roughly $60,000 per year.
“Husbands in egalitarian marriages spend about 3.5 hours more per week on leisure activities than wives do. Wives in these marriages spend roughly 2 hours more per week on caregiving than husbands do and about 2.5 hours more on housework.”
According to the researchers, the only marriages where the husbands spend as much time on housework as their wives is when the latter are the sole breadwinners in the family. Of course, women are earning more than half a century ago when the husbands were the primary breadwinners in 86% of marriages. However, there’s still a long way to go until there’s equity not just in terms of wages, but also in unpaid housework.
Brand new mom (7 weeks) and I would love a big dinner and dessert because I’ve been eating like c**p and haven’t been able to really cook while caring for the baby. I’d also like to take a long bath and maybe get a pedicure.
Just a day where I get home from work, they've done their chores and they aren't bickering over nothing.
It's not a lot, really...
It isn’t. It’s terrible to always have to go to DEFCON 1 or be the enforcer. I hope they also do NOT ask why you always yell. This made me insane.
We can get so used to our local celebrations that we can completely forget that the rest of the world might do things differently. Some countries like Hungary, Lithuania, Romania, Portugal, and Spain celebrate Mother’s Day on the first Sunday of May. (That falls on May 7 in 2023, so you’d better be getting ready!)
However, the vast majority of the world marks the celebration on the second Sunday of May (i.e. May 14 this year and May 12 in 2024), from Australia, Belgium, and Brazil to Canada, Peru, and the United States.
Gift voucher for a massage, a clean house and the lawns mowed. And a charcuterie board and a bottle of paired white wine all to myself.
I never knew children and SOs were the main reason for mother's stress. Will try to do better for my mom starting with the dishes.
One night in a hotel to sleep....and to come home to a clean house that wasn’t cleaned by me.
EDIT: k WOW, this really blew up. A silver and GOLD?!😭
To those saying something about my relationship and me doing all the work. My husband cleans (and cooks and does laundry) lol but moms everywhere know it’s not the same as when we clean. When my babies wake up in the middle of the night they’re not looking for daddy, they want mommy. That is all.💗
Some nations like the United Kingdom and Nigeria, however, celebrate Mother’s Day a bit earlier, on the fourth Sunday in Lent, known as Mothering Sunday (which fell on March 19 this year).
Other outliers include Norway which celebrates moms and motherhood on the second Sunday of February (which fell on the 12th in 2023). Countries like Albania, Armenia, and Bulgaria combine Mother’s Day with International Women’s Day, March 8. Meanwhile, Poland celebrates Mother’s Day on May 26, Thailand does it on August 12, and Indonesia does so late in the year, on December 22.
A day alone. A whole day. To sleep in. To shower as long as I want. To nap. To drink my tea and coffee HOT. To go to the bathroom uninterrupted. To nap again. To peruse through the shopping centre at my own leisure. To not be bombarded with a million questions (majority of which are "Why?").
*I love my kids. But f**k I would love just one day off.*
This is what I used to get for Mother's Day when the kids were at home. Priceless.
For my husband to go down on me again at least once.
To not have to hide in the bathroom to eat ice cream or sweets by myself. My 3 year old can hear the wrapper on a Klondike bar from a mile away.
I want a picture of my son and I. I’m a single mom, so all of our pictures are selfies. I would love for someone to offer to take our picture.
I think if you were to ask, this could be achieved. People may not offer for fear of looking like a weirdo.
Not a Mom, but check this out:
You pay a maid to clean your house. While she's cleaning, you go to the spa for a scrub and massage. While you're getting scrubbed, you get your car washed and detailed.
Just imagine that drive home.
I have a 17 year-old daughter, and I’m a single mom. I’d like to be able to sleep late (she could feed the dog & put him outside, and make her own breakfast). Then I’d like a letter from her saying she loves me, and remembering some of the times we’ve enjoyed or that I helped her
I became a single mom by adopting my daughter when she was 2. I remember how hurt I used to feel on Mother’s Day back when I was discouraged that I might not ever have a child. And honestly, I think of my child’s birth mom, too, on Mother’s Day (she is deceased), and I know it’s a bittersweet, mixed-up feelings kind of day for all adoptees, birth mothers, and adoptive mothers.
Shouldn't a 17 year old be capable of making herself breakfast, at the very least??
A nice card with a heartfelt message in it, hopefully giving me a clue that my kids have noticed I'm a person and not a kitchen appliance.
I'm an empty nester to a 24 year old son and a 29 year old daughter. I would love a phone call on Mother's Day. I usually get a simple text with the 3 words. They live over 1500 miles away and I should feel lucky, but I would still like to hear their voices. I do talk to my daughter often, and my son about once a month. Am I being the AH?
I wanna go to Target alone and get Starbucks and live my best basic b***h life for two hours.
Also, I wanna bang my hot husband. He's the reason I'm a mama.
A professional housecleaning service to come and clean my house. I honestly think most moms would love this.
I want to go to the park with my husband and son. Maybe go out for lunch somewhere together. And I don't want to be the one to have to initiate things we do together as a family.
I'm editing to add this because I have gotten comments that make a good point: It's a good idea to be appreciative of any attempts by your partner when s/he makes an attempt to plan things. The best way to encourage this behavior to reward any little attempt they make rather than complain when they do try.
I’d really just be excited to get uninterrupted sleep for a night.
I’m grandma age now but I remember that time in my life and how exhausted you get from broken sleep. I told my doctor I couldn’t sleep the night through and he offered me sleeping pills. It wasn’t ME that needed the sleeping pills. 😭 (Just in case anyone misunderstands I would never have drugged my children)
A clean house, solid uninterrupted d**k down from my husband and dinner I dont have to cook or clean up. Not in any particular order.
I want a house that stays clean for more than an hour, a meal I didn't make that I dont have to clean after, and a lovely day with my children and husband without having to worry about spending money. And chocolate, and a nap I don't have to set an alarm for.
A day off. But a proper day off, where they actually take care of everything I do, so it's not just do nothing on mothers day do twice as much to catch up the day after
eta: my husband does his share as a father, but I'm a stay at home mom, so, yeah lol
I want McDonalds and while I eat that I wanna watch whatever the hell **I** wanna watch on the damn tv without any b***hing or whining.
Poor honey. This is called Monday and Thursday at my house.
What I’ve learned from this thread is a clean house and if they have kids living with them, either time with them or a short break from them, is all that they want for Mother’s Day.
And my mom has told me that she wants a clean house every year yet I still clicked on this thread to see what I should get for her.
It took me far too long to realize that my mom just wanted our help in the garden... time together, digging our hands in the dirt, fresh air and sunshine, tending to the beautiful masterpiece she created. Sometimes it's as simple as that 💛
Champagne.
Someone to come deep clean my house.
Someone to cook me dinner while I sit on the couch with a drink.
24 hours alone. Every year the weekend before or after mother's day (mothers day itself I reserve for the kids) I take a weekend for myself. I book a hotel, not far, usually somewhere reasonably close but nice with a sauna, swimming pool and restaurant. I take a sauna, have a swim, take a book down to the bar, drink wine, read, meander into the restaurant have a nice meal, head up to my room chill out alone in the silence. It's pure bliss.
My mom died recently. My neighbor and plant mother treats me like her child. Can I shower her with everything I used to do for my mom? I know her kids won't do anything, just wondering if that would be appropriate. Nice earrings, a cool plant, and a handmade card. Would that be weird?
Not at all. I am sure she will appreciate it and I am glad you have someone in your love to keep sharing "mom love" with you.
Load More Replies...The things these women want are so little and simple (humble). I can't get my head around the fact that they need some me-time, rest, affection and peace and quiet. Jees. I kinda feel sorry for them.
I think when you are a mum of very young kids, its very hard to learn to prioritise yourself, and of course when you do, you face judgement (at least I did). I am pretty good at taking time to myself, hanging out with my girlfriends and prioritising myself on a regular basis and my husband does 50% of the cleaning, cooking, shopping and parenting, but time alone is still what I ask for for mothers day because between work and parenting and life, time is still my most valuable resource.
Load More Replies...24 hours alone. Every year the weekend before or after mother's day (mothers day itself I reserve for the kids) I take a weekend for myself. I book a hotel, not far, usually somewhere reasonably close but nice with a sauna, swimming pool and restaurant. I take a sauna, have a swim, take a book down to the bar, drink wine, read, meander into the restaurant have a nice meal, head up to my room chill out alone in the silence. It's pure bliss.
My mom died recently. My neighbor and plant mother treats me like her child. Can I shower her with everything I used to do for my mom? I know her kids won't do anything, just wondering if that would be appropriate. Nice earrings, a cool plant, and a handmade card. Would that be weird?
Not at all. I am sure she will appreciate it and I am glad you have someone in your love to keep sharing "mom love" with you.
Load More Replies...The things these women want are so little and simple (humble). I can't get my head around the fact that they need some me-time, rest, affection and peace and quiet. Jees. I kinda feel sorry for them.
I think when you are a mum of very young kids, its very hard to learn to prioritise yourself, and of course when you do, you face judgement (at least I did). I am pretty good at taking time to myself, hanging out with my girlfriends and prioritising myself on a regular basis and my husband does 50% of the cleaning, cooking, shopping and parenting, but time alone is still what I ask for for mothers day because between work and parenting and life, time is still my most valuable resource.
Load More Replies...