Hey pandas, what's the most traumatic thing that's happened to you? Share your stories with others!

#1

my mother's suicide when i was 15

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Cat Nip Gal
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4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why are people downvoting this, it's true. Suicide is very traumatic for family and friends.

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    #2

    I was hit by a logging truck when I was around 3 or 4. The traumatic part was that my mother beat the s**t out of my sister for not watching me. SHE WAS ONLY 5 OR 6. It was my mothers job to watch me; not a 5 or 6 year old.

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    #3

    The most traumatic thing that happened to me was when my dad first sexually abused me when I was around 7 years old. The second most traumatic thing was that he continued to sexually, physically and mentally abuse me until he died 20 some years later (he would violently rape me when I was older). The third most traumatic thing was when I told my mom what was going on at an early age, she blamed me and then did nothing to stop him or leave him. She chose him over me.

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    #4

    When I was a kid, I accidentally shut myself in the trunk of the family car. I didn't know about escape latches, so I was in there for a couple of hours thinking I was going to die. Thankfully my brothers found me.

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    #5

    Being kidnapped by my dad and him taking me through the woods with a knife in his hand.

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    #6

    I went with the girlfriend of a coworker to his house. We went into the garage and found that the coworker had killed himself. It was pretty obvious that he was dead. His girlfriend was 8 months pregnant at the time. All I could think about was her and the baby. I performed CPR on his corpse until paramedics arrived because I was afraid for their health and too afraid to tell her that he was gone.

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    #7

    My trauma is somewhat different, because I didn't 'experience it' directly as it happened. I have a weird malformed face that developed like that before I was even born. It was always complex dealing with it. My teenage years were the hardest. You know what being a teenager is like—insecurity, the need to be accepted by peers, the urge to know and accept who I am. Now it's fine, I got to accept that it's a part of me. Though I still feel the echoes of it: self-confidence, self-image problems, etc.

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    Pam LeBar
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My So,Alex,18,died on Mother's Day weekend right before graduation. My Mom died 6 weeks before. It got even worse,but the worst in the past 11 years is that I went to a Christian Presbyterian Psychologist that told me he went to hell. But I know she's wrong because God talked with me and told me he's alright. I still am faithful in Jesus,that's the best news.❣️

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    #8

    when i was 4 my little sis was born but in the same month my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer a few months later she died if she lived one more month she would have been treated i guess it was more traumatic to grow p without her not when she died because the pain was always there when i saw other kids with there parents ( this caused me to attempt suicide 2 times)

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    Cristina Sacchi
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Try living your life fully for both yourself and as a testament to your mom. 🖤

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    #9

    I thought I had found love at last. Moved to a new city, uprooted my son, with new refound hope. Everything was great, for a couple of months. Then his true colors came out.

    I was abused in every which way possible, physically, emotionally, verbally - on a daily basis. He would always attack me from behind, sending me flying unto the floor, tables, the couch, the nightstands - face first. I never saw it coming. Once he strangled me to the point I thought "this is how I die."; my ears started making the sound of a machine gun, and then I passed out for 3 hours.

    I finally left when he hit me in front of two of his boys and my son. 11 months later. All I wanted was to love him, but some people can't be loved because they have been unable to face, confront, heal and let go of past hurt.

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    Laugh Fan
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What an evil s**t. So glad you were able to leave Cristina - must have been terrifying. Those types really do mess with people's heads so I know it can't have been easy in so many ways. I hope you and your son are safe and well now.

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    #10

    I died once. I was going through a tough spell (girlfriend left me, lost my career, dogs both died etc.) with my mental health and decided to take a load of sleeping pills. I woke up in the ACU and honestly couldn't say that I was happy to have failed. I'm still in therapy years later. It's a living nightmare.

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    María Hermida
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    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    20 years ago some friends and I had a serious car accident. I managed to crawl out of the wreck and then I started to cry. People who came to help us thought I was crying because I was frightened or in shock, but I was was crying because I was disappointed I was still alive. I didn't tell anybody. I'm still not sure I'm happy I survived.

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    #11

    Alright. I'm sorry if this is long, but I just had to tell it. So last year there was a fire in my neighbor's house (no one died, btw). I couldn't sleep, so I stayed up. Big mistake. I remember my parents stepping outside on the porch. When they came back in, my mom was shouting "Let me go!" and "Stop it!" There was a sound of what I thought was a glass breaking, and my mom yelled in pain. I was so scared. I heard the door open again, then a car door open and shut again. It didn't drive away though. I heard the sound of my dog Peppa running outside, and my other dog Nilly whining in her crate. I made up my mind to go get Peppa, in case she annoyed the firefighters or police and they shot her. I put on shoes and walked out into the hall then living room, and what I saw I will never ever forget. There were large drops of blood everywhere on the floor. It trailed outside, too. I walked out on the porch and called Peppa. She did come, but I saw my dad sitting in the driver's seat of my mom's car, wearing sunglasses. I walked back inside, in fear of him seeing me. I waited in my room, and packed a small bag of stuff in case police took me somewhere to decide custody arrangements or something. I waited. And waited. Until about 11:30 pm. I decided that if my grandmother, who lived only a few minutes away, didn't come by midnight, I would run downstairs and forcibly take my uncle's phone if I had to. Seems dumb to me now, how I didn't even think about waking him up. Then, I heard the front door open yet again. My grandma came into the hall and walked over to my room. She told me we were leaving and going to her house. She told me to pack a few books in case I couldn't get to sleep later, then went to go wake up my brother, who somehow slept through it all. When we left, my grandma steered us away from the car. My dad, though, asked me if I was still going to be a giraffe in a Lion King play. My grandma told him no, obviously not, and a police came over and asked if she was Shireen. She said yes, and the officer said that they did a breath test on my dad and it came up negative. He acted of his own free will, free of alcohol (he was an alcohol abuser) or drugs. The next day, I learned that my mom had gotten out of the hospital, so my grandma took us back to my house. Turns out my mom had found 5 dating apps on his phone, and she confronted him about it. He got mad, and head-butted her in the face. He broke 3 bones: two in the nose, and one under her eye. I will never forget this, and after almost a full year I still get scared thinking about it. I'm ever so grateful that my grandma came. And, I'm even thankful for the fire. Not so much the fire, but the fact that the firemen and police were parked in front of our house. My mom was able to run into their arms and was carried away in an ambulance. I still don't know what was scarier: the fact that my dad was always kind and gentle, the fact that he was acting of his own free will, the sight of the blood, or the fact that I could hear everything. I haven't told any of my friends what had happened, or told my mom or dad that I could hear all of their fights. I only have told my grandma. And I know that my mom is thankful for her sister, who helped her while she was recovering. I always get on the verge of tears thinking about that night, and the weeks of my mom crying. Again, I'm so sorry that this was a long post.

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    Pixie
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't be sorry. It is a scary story, you were a scared kid, and it is often helpful to talk (or write) about the scaryness. When you don't have someone to talk about it, it is completly normal that it all comes rushing out when there is a place to tell your story. I hope it helped, sharing with us fellow pandas, and i wish you to be happy despite this c**p! (sorry for bad english, non-native speaker)

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    #12

    my sister left me at the age of 7 its been 4 years since a have seen her
    P.S. im 12 we last met at my sisters wedding

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was there a reason for your sister not visiting? if the family are still on the good side why not contact your sister and ask if you can stay with her during one of your holidays?

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    #13

    Really? In one week... my 26 year old son died, my car was repossessed. I was labeled disabled, and tried to die. I hate June, I hate life, i wish I could go 'home' too.

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    Lorraine R
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can't think of any words that would help you feel better, but I hope you will, soon.

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    #14

    I watched my mother die in front of my eyes, her terrified and screaming in pain.

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    Rowan Jeffus
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Woah. Now I'm kind of curious to know what happened. But I am truly sorry, and hope you are successful.

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    #15

    When I was 17 I was thrown into the gang section of the Washington, DC Juvenile Detention Facility to, in the words of the arresting officer, "teach me a lesson." White boy from a rural part of NJ and 35 black kids. I was beaten and raped repeatedly. But even then I understood the nature of institutionalized racism and knew that I represented every bad thing that had ever happened to them and so I was able to disconnect from it and endure. My only fear was that I would be permanently injured by their kicking my back and kidneys. Writing this has made my kidneys ache.

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    black, white or any over colour should not have to go through this and people like this should not be forgiven!!!

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    #16

    I lost my husband (and later on had to leave behind our home, our friends, our plans and dreams together) to a serious mental illness after he stopped taking his meds correctly. In a prolonged and agonizing period, my once sensitive, subdued spouse morphed into a scary, sketchy, sinister stranger. He was unstable and delusional and dangerous to my two very young children and I. We endured some whacky sh*# to say the least, and it was as sorrowful as it was scary... I lost my best friend and my partner, a complex but ultimately cursed, consumed, CRAZY man. We did make it truth and my amazing kiddos are (presumably) normal teenagers, cool people who I am proud of and genuinely like and admire (and who are certainly not without their own traumatic scars from early childhood incidents and feelings of frustration and fear.). We survived that, together, the Three of Us, and we know that that is something that binds us together in foo many unspoken ways; yet we are still navigating and surviving it the periodic fallout, from their dad’s illness (he’s not in the picture much any more but seems to find ways to pop into our lives like a nail bomb at a parade); divorce was final years ago and I’m just glad to be on the other side of that huge mountain of grief, exasperation, hopelessness, LOSS... I’m just grateful it is in the past. I feel nauseated with dread at the memory.

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    #17

    When I was 12 my family when camping, as we did every summer. Parents in one tent, my sister and I in the other.

    It got to about 11pm and then a tornado decided to wander over the campsite.

    I'm now 32 and I still have nightmares about it.

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    #18

    Well not so much traumatic but anyways... I was about 8 years old and I had to go to the hospital because I was showing all of the symptoms of Type 1 Diabetes. My mom brought me to the hospital, and the whole way there she ranted about how "I didn't have Diabetes, I was just thirsty", and so on. She promised me before we went in to the hospital she would buy me an ice cream and that we would celebrate me not having diabetes after we left. Long story short... I had Type 1 Diabetes. My mom couldn't stop apologizing, and I wasn't allowed to have any ice cream. Instead, I have to stick myself with a needle six times a day. I'm 11 now, and my mom and I always laugh at the incident now, but as an 8 year-old, I was crushed.

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    #19

    well to me this wasn't traumatic, but my friends told me they were all terrified and it looked really scary.
    So when I was younger I was at summer camp and we were out on a motor boat. We were doing an activity called shark bait, if any of you know what that's called, where you jump off the motor boat and grab onto a rope that's tied to the back of the boat. and I jumped wrong and couldn't get to the surface and the boat went over me. I wasn't hurt so don't worry.
    Yep.

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As long as your okay but i bet it made you look like indestructible to your mates. Be good if you had a superman outfit on

    #20

    Getting sexually abused by my brother's best friend 8 years ago (they're still best friends).

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    does your brother know? and if not why not tell him at the time? I dont know how your brothers friend has the audacity to show his face even up to this day! you should confront him about this now that you are older.

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    #21

    I went to the hospital for croup when I was 8, I passed out twice, I ended up getting one of those breathing mask thingies. In the end my mom said I could get anything I wanted, I chose athletic tape.

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    #22

    Older brother came after me with a 12 inch kitchen knife one evening when I was 15. He held it against my neck and I was somehow able to wrestle it out of his hand. It was during a psychotic episode, as he is Bipolar. Even knowing that he wasn't totally in control of his actions I will never forget that memory. He has done many other things to my family and I in psychotic/manic episodes but that will always be the one that traumatized me the most.

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    sorry to hear that. not nice memories but imagine how bad them memories are to your brother. Each and everyone of them.

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    #23

    When I was 7 I was run over by a lawnmower. I had 5 surgeries over the next 2 1/2 years. I blocked a lot of it out but I remember seeing the tendon in my hand as I looked down while I running for help.

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    #24

    My 16yr old Daughter dropped out of a private art school and ran away when I wouldn't allow the new homeless 18yr old boyfriend move in. That was 10yrs ago.

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    #25

    7 years ago I had the best relationship in the world, I loved my boyfriend so much... he was a sleepwalker and one night after we talked by the phone ( he was playing PS) I got mad at him because he seemed more attentive to the game than me.. so I did not tell him that I love him as I always did... the next day his family called me telling em that he have fallen from the 11th floor of his building, his dad was sleeping on his same room and he couldn't reach him on time... He was 23 and had the kindest soul I have ever met... the fact that I did not tell him what he meant to me hunts me seven years later...

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    #26

    After going to an event at my downtown area, I stayed up all night vomiting. In the morning, I couldn't drink water without vomiting but I was incredibly thirsty. I still can't eat chicken fries from Burger King or large chunks of chocolate in baked goods because of that night.

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    #27

    I lost my mother back in the beginning of 2017 to lung cancer. She was 64 and never smoked in her entire life. We suspect it may have been due to working with certain chemicals when she worked for pharmaceutical drug companies, but we'll never know for sure. I also lost my grandfather near the end of April this year due to the Corona virus. He was 98, and we were extremely close with him. He didn't initially have the virus, but contacted it when he was in a rehab center recovering from another condition.

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    Kim Smith
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am sorry for your loss, but it sounds like they had good long lives. Especially 98.. You will see them again. prayers.

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    #28

    Umm. Not sure if people are going to want to read this but years ago a fake snapchat account was trying to obtain nudes from my friends. Being an idiot, I added the account to try find out who it was. They send me nude photos. It was my brother. Had my suspicions, people told me I was crazy for thinking it was him. There's more to it than that but yeah I'm going to leave it there..

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    #30

    Living dead... me living; yet, dead. I am trying to "come out of it". So many losses over a decade. The horrible pain and suffering; then, just gone. Here one minute and gone the next. Let alone the horrors of this man-made society... someone must be at fault. Throw someone under the bus and all move along as though the next time is the first all over again. Do good works; be the best you can be; try harder.... I'm exhausted. There's never a moment just for me; so much so, I have forgotten how (and what's more, that's its alright) to have pleasure; to treat myself. Seems its for everyone else my existence. I have no family; nor, any friends. I live in silence, less I bend to shout. I inherited the family trait of hearing loss and now my eyes are failing too. While I hurt for all the right reasons and I try to find the "good" in all things... judgement swings against me as easy prey. Yes, I've been hurt deeply and chronically; but, I know I am sane more sane than most. I am different -- and that's ok. I hope to emerge before the end. To dance apologetically in total ecstasy; I pray.

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    #31

    Being emotionally/psychologically abused by my father my whole childhood and teenage years (until he left, and then the abuse was only sporadic when I saw him as an adult. I no longer have anything to do with him). He also abused my older sister in the same way, only now she is the one who treats me in an emotionally abusive way - I have anxiety attacks when I am around her. As a child/teenager I had a couple of very distinct out-of-body experiences, but I also blanked out a lot of my childhood. I just don't remember stuff. Was depressed, suicidal and went completely emotionally numb as a teenager. Wasn't able to develop strong emotional attachments to anyone. In my twenties I experienced depression and intense mood swings, like periods of hypermania. I dissociate from my body, like the whole world and my sense of self with it is completely crumbling into a void. Very low self-esteem, terrified of upsetting anyone, mostly enjoy my own company. Now I am ok, and even quite successful and happy as long as I am not around my sister, who always puts me down. I do experience anxiety and panic attacks, and periods of depression or melancholy is very normal for me. I am seeing a councillor now. I have been dealing with this all alone for so long, but now I am finally asking for help.

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    what happened to you, and your sister abusing you too is all pin pointed down to the father. Your sister is not totally to blame here as she is going through the same s**t that you are. The difference is that she lets her rage out in a secretive way as you just stay shut and say nothing. Good that you are successful in life and that you will one day forget the scumbag that let you down in the first place. fk him!!!

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    #32

    There are so many.

    US military bootcamp.

    Abusive husband with a drug addiction and alcohol problem.

    Finding my second husband nearly dead in our bed from sleep apnea complicated by pneumonia. And a couple hours later watching the tests they do to determine if someone is brain dead and having the drs take him off of life support. 2 years later I still have nightmares about the things they do to determine brain death, but they are doing it to me and I can't move so they declare me brain dead and I can't stop them unplugging me.

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    #33

    So far it's:
    1) My mom suddenly passed out in the kitchen
    2) Finding out that some peanut butter has oil in it
    (I'm used to skippies)

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    #34

    I hid under the stairs…enormous spider…got bitten…not exactly bathmophobia but it was traumatising

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Im an arachnophobia. (not that i would kill them though) But one day my missus removed a spider from the bath and chased me around the house with it! I ran into the bedroom screaming like a little girl and locked myself in for almost 2 hours.

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    #35

    I was ten and my sister was three and she needed a surgery. She had her adenoids and ttonsios removed. A few days after she came home and hemriged all over the floor and my mom was sobbing and was asking if we should call and ambulance but we didn’t have time so my dad drove to the hospital so so so fast. I was sobbing and my other little sis was chilling playing Minecraft. She would have died but they got her it o the surgery very fast and I’m so thankful. She is alive and well three years later and a total brat but I love her ❤️

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    ChinaPandas122
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    why your other little sis is just chilling? shouldn't she be worried?

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    #36

    When I was young, I would constantly get separated from parents in the store.

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    Billy The Kid
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    sounds to me that your parents were irresponsible to be constantly losing their child. (no offence)

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    #37

    Seventh grade

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    Phoebe
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then your pretty lucky but being in muddle school I do have to say it’s a s******e

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    #38

    It might not sound traumatic, but to me it is.
    I watched a horror movie when I was a child. Flashforward many years later and I still can't sleep without the lights on.

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    Doggo Georgia
    Community Member
    4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes that happens to me but not for that long. I'm sorry that happened.