If I don't get up at an acceptable time (between 515-516), my cats have a meeting and choose one cat to "take one for the team". That cat then comes into my room and starts "YUURRRK, YURRK, YURRK" because they know that sound gets me bolt upright, waving my arms and yelling "not on the bed, not on the bed!"

I tend to be a restless sleeper because I get leg cramps from being on my feet all day. The reason this is relevant is that during the day, my cat weighs about nine pounds. At night however--especially when she settles down between my legs--her density somehow increases to roughly that of a neutron star, making it impossible for me to roll over or even shift to a more comfortable position. And of course any attempt to dislodge her, not matter how gentle, is met with a more aggrieved yowl than an animal that size should be capable of.

Does anyone have a cat that yowls when it's lonely and wants to know where people are? 2 female cats in a row we've had yowlers, first one started it after she went blind but this one is just needy.

I haven't seen this mentioned, so I'm gonna: if you do not, in fact, have a cat, and still hear odd noises at night...then the odds are that your paranoia is perfectly valid and you are actually hearing a serial killer trip over s**t in your hallway. For those of us with cats? I like to think of them as a comfort, cos at night suspicious noises abound. The difference is, the cat person can comfort themselves that it's their mischievous feline and roll over to go back to sleep. That way, you'll be sound asleep when the killer finally makes it to your room. I don't know about you, but dying in my sleep sounds pretty peaceful. Ahh, cats. What would we do without them.

We had a very sweet and kind big dog when our neighbor's cat had her kittens on our patio. We chose to keep two of them and the dog loved them, groomed them let them crawl all over him and eat his food. One of the cats returned the sentiment unconditionally. The other had to perform a daily morning ritual where she hid under the table and waited for the dog to walk by to shoot out and hit him over the head to set the chain of command straight and let him love on her. He knew she was there, he sometimes cried and hesitated but he also wouldn't let us chase her away. It was their strange little thing.

My cats sound like herds of hoofed animals. How? I dunno. Why? Eh. they're cats. Then they cuddle and it's wonderful. For non-cat-people? I also love dogs, and have had dogs who managed to do amazing things, too, in a "omg, how am I cleaning this up?!" sort of way ;-D

My aunts old apartment had a cemetery behind it and every night at a specific time he would sit and stare out the back window into the cemetery and then get freaked. He also use to chase ghost mice. Never anything there but darn it he was chasing something only he could see

I loved these stories, but since the title says stories about cats' "amusing nighttime routines," not "bedtime routines," I had hoped that someone had finally cracked the secret of what in the world cats get up to, exactly, while we're sound asleep. Oh well, the mystery remains.

I got my first cat 55 years and 9 days ago. I did not have a cat between 1982 and 1999 due to my ex-husband’s allergies. Since 1999, I have had one or more cats. During this latter period, I have learned to sleep without moving, because once I go to sleep, my cats will find a spot to cuddle next to me and if I move, I’ll disturb them. If that happens, they will move to other parts of the house and not sleep with me anymore. I suffer from chronic pain and the cats seem to know that the warmth from their bodies and the pressure against me helps with the pain. They also know that I suffer from massive insomnia as well and never wake me up for breakfast. So I don’t move at night and they are considerate to me during bedtime. However, if I do move, the long-haired cat moves to sleep on my pillow, right in front of my face so I can’t breathe. They have their ways.

There is always food out for my cat, but she won’t eat in the morning until she’s yelled at me to get up, then leads me to the bathroom, where her food is safe from our dog, eats for half a minute and then goes back to bed. I love her. She’s a f*****g jerk. These are not mutually exclusive.

Our cats were raised by our dogs, they're like a hybrid and it's awesome. They are still somewhat active at night, but much better behaved than what I hear from other cat people. They do sleep with us most of the time. My favourite thing about having long hair was one of the cats carefully gathering it and then sleeping on it. In the morning, they don't wake us up, but it's like they can hear us opening our eyes, literally before we even move in bed. Actually having both cats and dogs is the best, I really love different aspects of both.

My theory is that cats just pretend to be nocturnal! When I was pregnant and got out of bed at all hours of the night, my cat was just sleeping just as he does during the day. Only if I disturbed his sleep he would get busy. I think they made us believe they are nocturnal so they can be lazy during the day

My cat is pretty well behaved because I may have out-catted her. When she was adopted, at first she'd do naughty things and even overturned the garbage can when she didn't get food when she wanted. I just ignored her and groomed myself (more like watch Netflix). Eventually I would get up to clean the mess and say 'no' firmly while cleaning up. Let them throw up, don't react right away, you don't want them to use it as a weapon to get you out of bed, or worse, leave a trail of vomit while they get spooked by you (ew). My kitty isn't allowed on counters/tables and does a decent job of not going on them ... while I am awake.

Our cats would have a running spree on the roof... in the middle of the night. Can't complain about it.

My husband and I are not always asleep at the same time. If one of us is in bed and the other's awake in the living room, the cat cannot make up her mind which human she wants and will drive us both up the wall yoyo-ing back and forth. I'm not sure why, since there's nothing unusual going on around here, but she's currently hiding in the bed, under a weighted blanket heavier than she is (she went there on her own initiative).

I want a cat now!!!!

So many stories lol. I had a cat that would lick my eyelids to wake me, I put a curtain in my bedroom doorway so I have privacy but the cats can come and go, and I can't remember the last time I used the bathroom without at least one audience member. The latest cutest one is my youngest will look out the window at night, and then cry at me because I can't make it light outside like I do inside. He is so confused poor guy

My cat will wake me for snuggles. He'll also cry at my bedroom door if we've gone to bed but others are still up because he thinks he is missing out on something.

I gotta say, that first picture sure looks like a comfy bed.

Mine has very set routines. Screams in the morning for her breakfast, at the dining table, I'm allowed back to bed after that. At night she tells me when it's bedtime and if I don't take a treat for her to have on the bed she'll get me up all night until she gets it

Miso, our 4yo Tonkinese, usually goes to bed when hubby does, around 9pm. I'm a night owl, so I'm up until whenever. If he decides I need to go to bed, he'll come out and meow until I walk to the bedroom. Then I go back. You can't close the door or he'll tear up the carpet trying to get in or out. He normally lays with hubby m but when I come to bed he'll lay on my body pillow (blocking the fan) waiting for me to pet him. If I stop, he leaves!

One of my cats likes to nuzzle under my arm and sleep (when I'm in bed). It can get SUPER annoying, but it's still precious.

The OP was dumb af, but there were some amusing stories after they stopped that stupid "non cat owner/cat owner" bs in the beginning.

I have Cujo-Kitty (totally opposite of her personality, she just latched on to me when I got her and would hiss at anyone close to me) and Raj Kuthrapali (when I got him they were separated to get acquainted and somehow the lil engineer would figure out how to get out of the bathroom at night). They are weird, and creepy, and affectionate and protective, and always hungry and annoying and my best Lil buds(kinda like kids🤣). Can't imagine life without them. They're absolutely hilarious. They literally have personalities similar to people I know🤣