To find out more about surviving one heck of a wedding that ends up in the miscellaneous collection on r/WeddingShaming, we spoke with the Redditor Peedidhe who shared a screenshot of an invitation with a caption “I went to the wedding where the bride and groom hated vegetarians.” The image featured a rather rude remark on vegetarian guests: “We will be having a buffet style. It should accommodate all ways of eating, even those who chose wrong and lack taste buds—yes, I am talking to you, vegetarians!”

The Redditor told us that the menu consisted of turkey, ham, beef taquitos in eggroll wrappers, and plantains. “I ate a lot of plantains,” they added. They commented: “Honestly, it's their wedding. If they don't want to cater to vegetarians, that's ok! But... like to acknowledge that you don't have vegetarian food instead of pretending plantains are dinner.”

Peedidhe agrees that wedding planning in such chaotic times may indeed be a challenge for the couples. “As someone attempting to plan a wedding in these crazy times, people are getting cast in all sorts of unflattering lights because they don't want grandma to die because she thinks vaccinations are bad.”

According to the Redditor, the pandemic has created a pressure cooker of love, resulting in lots of proposals, and also a pressure cooker of expectation because weddings are supposed to be a certain way. If it was up to Peedidhe, weddings would be planned with guests as a priority. “I think weddings should be planned for the guests rather than for the couple, but I understand weddings that are planned for the couple. It's a celebration of love, and ultimately whatever makes you happy is the most important,” they said and added jokingly: “even if some people have nothing to eat.”

If you wonder what’s up with these wedding hosts for behaving this way, you’re not alone. The bridezillas, tantrums, family dramas and whatnot have been all over the media lately, and they are grabbing our attention like nothing else. The audacity, the rudeness, the ego…

The corner of Reddit known as Wedding Shaming was created precisely to share such instances. According to the sub's moderator Luna, “There’s something about weddings, whether you’re invited or not, that just brings out the worst in people.” That’s not to say like all weddings are real-life dramas, but there’s a lot of elements in many of them. Luna believes that the group is akin to a reality TV show, and you can’t argue.

But no matter how popular it may be, the group has also received a fair share of backlash. In fact, some claim it promotes mockery culture, even hate speech. But Darlene Lancer, clinical psychologist and the author of “Codependency for Dummies” and “Conquering Shame and Codependency” with whom we talked a while ago assured us that wedding shamers are not considered to be a hate group.

Darlene further explained that “Ironically, public displays of extravagant and ostentatious weddings may also be fueled by shame where the emphasis is on impressing other people of the family’s wealth and status.” Such behavior can be a compensation for not feeling adequate or sufficiently respected.