People Side With Wedding Photographer Who Canceled On Bride The Night Before Her Big Day
The customer is not always right. You can’t place the burden of responsibility just on the shoulders of the person who’s providing the service you’re paying for. Professionals—from every field—need information from their customers in order to do a good job; and they deserve at least a little bit of common courtesy and respect. Wedding photography is no different.
Wedding photographer Shayla Herrington explained in a viral video on TikTok how a few years ago she canceled on a bride-to-be the night before her ceremony. While that sounds like an awful thing to do on the surface right before their big day, in reality, there were very good reasons for Shayla to do this. And her TikTok followers completely agree with her.
Scroll down for the full story, Pandas. Let us know who you think is in the wrong here and what you would have done if you were in Shayla’s shoes. Meanwhile, if any of you are wedding photographers, we’d love to hear a bit about your job, the challenges you face, why you do it, and the toughest clients you’ve had to deal with.
More info: TikTok | Facebook | ShaylaHerringtonPhotography.com
Wedding photographer Shayla, from Arkansas, went viral after opening up about a weird situation that happened with a client some time ago
Image credits: shaylamherrington
She shared why she canceled on the bride-to-be right before the big day
Here is the viral TikTok video in full
@shaylamherrington Was I in the wrong? Find the preset i used to edit in my bio! #weddingphotographer #weddings #weddingplanning #storytime #wedding #photographer #engaged #preset ♬ Monkeys Spinning Monkeys – Kevin MacLeod & Kevin The Monkey
Wedding photographer Shayla has 335.7k followers on TikTok, and her viral video netted her a jaw-dropping 307.4k likes, as well as 2.8 million views.
The photographer, from Northwest Arkansas, has a passion for capturing memories. However, that actually requires her clients to fill out her wedding questionnaire and at least try and pick up her calls and respond to her messages.
The challenging client paid the deposit without a problem, but after the initial phone call with Shayla, she completely ghosted the photographer. Shayla had no clue where the venue even was. And her best attempts to get in touch with the bride-to-be were completely fruitless.
Eventually, the pro realized that she’d have to cancel on the entire event. She did so the night before the ceremony and that was that. Only it wasn’t. The bride got in touch the day after the wedding, calling Shayla unprofessional and left a bad review on Facebook. The photographer then returned the deposit.
However, after hearing the entire story and learning the whole context, TikTokers far and wide supported the wedding photographer’s decision. After all, the client broke the rules of the agreement. And it’s just plain rude to completely ghost the person whose services you desperately want. Yes, organizing weddings is stressful. But wedding industry professionals deserve at least the minimum amount of respect from their clients.
“I booked her and sent her the questionnaire right after our first—and only—phone conversation. She understood I needed it within that week so I could properly do my job and know where I needed to be and what time I needed to be there,” Shayla told Newsweek.
On her website, Shayla notes that she sees her interactions with her clients as very important. She attributes her professional success to her ability to ‘click’ with the people she’s photographing.
“I photograph people the way they are and the interactions that happen between them. I am constantly on the lookout for a hidden smile, a knowing look, a private joke, acrobatic moves on the dance floor—any interaction that creates energy while telling a story,” she writes.
According to Shayla, her fascination with photography started in her teenage years, when she was 15. “My mother had just purchased a cheap camera to take with us on family vacations, and asked for my help figuring it out. I messed with the dials and had my best friend pose in front of the camera for me. A few hours later, I had learned the most basic functions, and had quite a few pictures of my friend,” she reveals.
“I remember when my friend went home that evening I got the camera back out and started taking pictures of anything and everything. It was like I couldn’t get photography out of my mind, and that’s still the case today. As my photography changed, so did I. Photography made me an adventurer, an entrepreneur, and an admirer of the world around me.”
Some time ago, photographer Dominic Sberna explained to Bored Panda why contracts are so important when working events. “A signed contract in this day and age is important, but it’s even more important to have everything upfront if either individual has any doubts. “Something a lot of people forget is that a verbal contract is also legally binding. So, it’s more about making everything transparent between each party involved,” he told us.
“Stay hydrated, bring snacks if needed, and wear a comfy pair of shoes. The brain and body need sustenance and you’ll be more focused if you keep yourself sustained. If you cannot wear a comfy pair of shoes, get a good pair of inserts,” pro photographer Dominic shared some great advice for photographers who have to spend hours and hours on their feet at events.
Meanwhile, Alexander Kjerulf, from Positive Sharing, told Bored Panda that the customer really isn’t always right. He shared some tips and tricks on what to do if you ever encounter someone rude while on the job, whatever industry you might be working in.
“Keep your cool and remember that whatever abuse they’re giving you is no reflection on you as a person. That customer doesn’t even know you, so there’s no way it could be. But on the other hand, don’t be subservient. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and tell customers that abuse is not tolerated. And if it persists, hand them over to a manager as soon as you can and let them deal with it,” he explained.
“You have to remember that in many cases a customer who behaves badly is not necessarily a bad person—it can be a good person having a bad day and that’s why they’re acting out. But the sad truth is that some customers act this way because they’ve learned that it works and will get them discounts or preferential treatment.”
He added: “Whenever I’m a customer anywhere, I always try to be kind and positive to the staff—even when occasionally I have to complain about something. It’s literally the least I can do.”
TikTok showed the photographer a lot of love and support. Here’s what some users had to say about the whole situation
I think you should have kept your deposit. If she had sued you, you would have won. You did your due diligence to do the right thing and she ignored you.
This is exactly the kind of thing a deposit is for, as well. The photographers time and effort trying to chase down the bride isn't free.
Load More Replies...The only thing OP could have done better is set a clear boundary. "If I don't receive this information by (date), the contract will be void."
That's just about what I was going to say. OP did try to get it on multiple occasions, but I think that should be added (assuming it hasn't been) for any future bookings.
Load More Replies...Never give a non refundable deposit back! That is literally what they are for...when the client wastes your time
I just really need to express how floored I am that the bride Didn't. Even. Say. Where. It. Was. Like, it's pretty bad to not go over expectations in advance. But what really makes this bride the Mayor of Crazy Town is that she DIDN'T EVEN SAY WHERE IT WAS. There are universes where you can give your photographer rushed instructions when they show up at your wedding, as rude and insane as those universes are. There is NO universe where your photographer shows up and renders her services when you haven't told her where to go!!!! Who-- who expects that? Does the bride literally believe that everyone is telepathic and can read her mind? To reply to the prior-night email with anything other than "oh my god I'm so sorry I am overwhelmed and dropped the ball, is there any possible way you can still show up at X, if not I understand" is so delusional, it needs its own entry in the DSM-V. Like what did she expect to happen otherwise? The photographer would have not shown up!
I wonder if another photographer was lined up. That the bride wanted out of the contract anyway. Awful way to treat a business.
Oooh. I bet that's what it was. And the outright rejection triggered her to an emotional reaction; she had just wanted to ghost. It makes WAY more sense than expecting a photographer to show up at location you haven't shared.
Load More Replies...YTA for giving her deposit back. You kept the date free for her and she failed to keep her end of the bargain, meaning you potentially missed out on other work. As to the bad review, if you can I would reply to it with a factual account of what happened, or if not, then contact the review site and ask for it to be taken down, giving them a factual account of what happened.
I think there were 2 mistakes, 1) refunding the deposit, and 2) continuing to chase the client down. Send the questionnaire, do then two followups; first with the gift card, and the second a week later kindly explaining "I need to receive your completed questionnaire by x date, or I will be unable to provide services." then let it lay. OP has no idea if the couple broke up and the person can't deal, or if as in this case is just an entitled jerk. Either way no need to stalk or refund them!
Should have kept the depost. She signed/agreed to no refund. She also didnt reachout to you about wedding info at all even on the DAY OF the wedding. Thats on her.
Agreed the only thing she screwed up on was refunding the non-refundable deposit. After all, she could not have know what a waste of skin the bride turned out to be. lol
I would have charged her full price with the words, “I have completed editing the photos from your wedding at the venue you specified and here are the best of. I am sure you will enjoy them. Please choose … [typical next steps language].” And then send her 300 photos of a white wall. Justification for full price is that you were not available to book anyone else for the time so why should you loose income for the bride’s failure to communicate?
Everyone talks about the deposit. What I would've done is cancelled the contract like at least a day before. If i didn't have time to survey the location, photography will be really hard. Idk why she even waited until night. It didn't do her any favor other than making a good tiktok video title.
What did the bride expect? That the photographer is a psychic and the fairies will tell her where to be at what time? I think it's even beyond kind that she gave back the deposit, she didn't have to do that. The 5 dollar gift card for Starbucks? Thoughtful. And then the bride dares to call the photographer unprofessional? She's lucky to have even gotten her money back!
This is just bizarre, I need to know what was up? Why the lack of communication on her part? The Sad truth is most people can't organize a group dinner with friends let alone a damn wedding. Just last week a buddy wanted to have a Bday' meal at a Teppan steak and sushi place out of town on a Friday(always packed). He didn't understand why one would need to make a reservation for 14 people on a Friday night.
Ok so I do photography on the side and at first I was furious she canceled the day before the wedding but then I read it. Lol Shame on that bride, I would 100% not have given the deposit back. I never do, it's non refundable for a reason, mine is to hold the date so I don't double book or lose out on income. I got married last year and I texted my photogs constantly. Sometimes just to say hi (great couple). this must not have been that important. Then I would've posted on her FB post all the ignored texts / emails.
I want to know what the Facebook review said exactly. I hate only hearing one side of the story.
I get that. It really would be better to get both sides. But the problem is that this would dox the other person, and if a mob of angry Internet people decided to hop on Facebook and harass the bride, call her workplace, etc., that would be really bad. Even if the "bad guy" defends themselves well in the original, most people don't read that-- they go directly to Workplace information, to phone number lookup. It's already happened many times that the "bad guy" in a story has been doxxed and ruined in real life. This is why there are rules against doxxing, which identifying a Facebook post would do. There's a big difference between posting a public review, and posting a public review that is then pointed to by a Reddit/BP post with tens of thousands of views. Which is sadly why we need to let people post only their one side of the story and get an NTA verdict they don't deserve. It's the lesser evil.
Load More Replies...You were not wrong to cancel. What was wrong was giving the deposit back due to a one star. You should have responded to the review so that everyone knew the full story, not just the spoiled bride's version of events. She wanted you to look bad and by returning her deposit and putting her a** on blast you did just that. Use this as a learning tool. She s*****d up. Not you. Good luck and do not cave.
OP, you did your utmost to help the client but she Ignored your calls and Emails, so the onus is on Her. Rewrite your contracts to include the paragraph that all questions Must be answered. and received within 8 days or the contract is totally voided and the deposit will be retained. Take a picture of All texts between you and client to note comments and replies, and the Dates of your communications to and from.
Go to the wrong church and charge her for taking photos of someone else's wedding
I can completely understand why the photographer voided the contract, but I have to say I think it was stupid of her to give back the NON-REFUNDABLE deposit. The bride will feel vindicated now, and we never learned whether she took back the bad review.
I would not have given her deposit back, seems u were more worried than she was, & everyone threatens bad review but do not say why this action happened
Hm... I can understand why she cancelled but I would not have done that. It's not like she has another job lined up, so the day will either be gone or it will go ahead, in which case she can earn some money. I'd have called on the day and asked where I am supposed to be. Similar things happen a lot on my job (also self-employed) and it's annoying not to be able to plan ahead, but not SUCH a big deal. In the end she does not have the income and a bad review.
I think you should have kept your deposit. If she had sued you, you would have won. You did your due diligence to do the right thing and she ignored you.
This is exactly the kind of thing a deposit is for, as well. The photographers time and effort trying to chase down the bride isn't free.
Load More Replies...The only thing OP could have done better is set a clear boundary. "If I don't receive this information by (date), the contract will be void."
That's just about what I was going to say. OP did try to get it on multiple occasions, but I think that should be added (assuming it hasn't been) for any future bookings.
Load More Replies...Never give a non refundable deposit back! That is literally what they are for...when the client wastes your time
I just really need to express how floored I am that the bride Didn't. Even. Say. Where. It. Was. Like, it's pretty bad to not go over expectations in advance. But what really makes this bride the Mayor of Crazy Town is that she DIDN'T EVEN SAY WHERE IT WAS. There are universes where you can give your photographer rushed instructions when they show up at your wedding, as rude and insane as those universes are. There is NO universe where your photographer shows up and renders her services when you haven't told her where to go!!!! Who-- who expects that? Does the bride literally believe that everyone is telepathic and can read her mind? To reply to the prior-night email with anything other than "oh my god I'm so sorry I am overwhelmed and dropped the ball, is there any possible way you can still show up at X, if not I understand" is so delusional, it needs its own entry in the DSM-V. Like what did she expect to happen otherwise? The photographer would have not shown up!
I wonder if another photographer was lined up. That the bride wanted out of the contract anyway. Awful way to treat a business.
Oooh. I bet that's what it was. And the outright rejection triggered her to an emotional reaction; she had just wanted to ghost. It makes WAY more sense than expecting a photographer to show up at location you haven't shared.
Load More Replies...YTA for giving her deposit back. You kept the date free for her and she failed to keep her end of the bargain, meaning you potentially missed out on other work. As to the bad review, if you can I would reply to it with a factual account of what happened, or if not, then contact the review site and ask for it to be taken down, giving them a factual account of what happened.
I think there were 2 mistakes, 1) refunding the deposit, and 2) continuing to chase the client down. Send the questionnaire, do then two followups; first with the gift card, and the second a week later kindly explaining "I need to receive your completed questionnaire by x date, or I will be unable to provide services." then let it lay. OP has no idea if the couple broke up and the person can't deal, or if as in this case is just an entitled jerk. Either way no need to stalk or refund them!
Should have kept the depost. She signed/agreed to no refund. She also didnt reachout to you about wedding info at all even on the DAY OF the wedding. Thats on her.
Agreed the only thing she screwed up on was refunding the non-refundable deposit. After all, she could not have know what a waste of skin the bride turned out to be. lol
I would have charged her full price with the words, “I have completed editing the photos from your wedding at the venue you specified and here are the best of. I am sure you will enjoy them. Please choose … [typical next steps language].” And then send her 300 photos of a white wall. Justification for full price is that you were not available to book anyone else for the time so why should you loose income for the bride’s failure to communicate?
Everyone talks about the deposit. What I would've done is cancelled the contract like at least a day before. If i didn't have time to survey the location, photography will be really hard. Idk why she even waited until night. It didn't do her any favor other than making a good tiktok video title.
What did the bride expect? That the photographer is a psychic and the fairies will tell her where to be at what time? I think it's even beyond kind that she gave back the deposit, she didn't have to do that. The 5 dollar gift card for Starbucks? Thoughtful. And then the bride dares to call the photographer unprofessional? She's lucky to have even gotten her money back!
This is just bizarre, I need to know what was up? Why the lack of communication on her part? The Sad truth is most people can't organize a group dinner with friends let alone a damn wedding. Just last week a buddy wanted to have a Bday' meal at a Teppan steak and sushi place out of town on a Friday(always packed). He didn't understand why one would need to make a reservation for 14 people on a Friday night.
Ok so I do photography on the side and at first I was furious she canceled the day before the wedding but then I read it. Lol Shame on that bride, I would 100% not have given the deposit back. I never do, it's non refundable for a reason, mine is to hold the date so I don't double book or lose out on income. I got married last year and I texted my photogs constantly. Sometimes just to say hi (great couple). this must not have been that important. Then I would've posted on her FB post all the ignored texts / emails.
I want to know what the Facebook review said exactly. I hate only hearing one side of the story.
I get that. It really would be better to get both sides. But the problem is that this would dox the other person, and if a mob of angry Internet people decided to hop on Facebook and harass the bride, call her workplace, etc., that would be really bad. Even if the "bad guy" defends themselves well in the original, most people don't read that-- they go directly to Workplace information, to phone number lookup. It's already happened many times that the "bad guy" in a story has been doxxed and ruined in real life. This is why there are rules against doxxing, which identifying a Facebook post would do. There's a big difference between posting a public review, and posting a public review that is then pointed to by a Reddit/BP post with tens of thousands of views. Which is sadly why we need to let people post only their one side of the story and get an NTA verdict they don't deserve. It's the lesser evil.
Load More Replies...You were not wrong to cancel. What was wrong was giving the deposit back due to a one star. You should have responded to the review so that everyone knew the full story, not just the spoiled bride's version of events. She wanted you to look bad and by returning her deposit and putting her a** on blast you did just that. Use this as a learning tool. She s*****d up. Not you. Good luck and do not cave.
OP, you did your utmost to help the client but she Ignored your calls and Emails, so the onus is on Her. Rewrite your contracts to include the paragraph that all questions Must be answered. and received within 8 days or the contract is totally voided and the deposit will be retained. Take a picture of All texts between you and client to note comments and replies, and the Dates of your communications to and from.
Go to the wrong church and charge her for taking photos of someone else's wedding
I can completely understand why the photographer voided the contract, but I have to say I think it was stupid of her to give back the NON-REFUNDABLE deposit. The bride will feel vindicated now, and we never learned whether she took back the bad review.
I would not have given her deposit back, seems u were more worried than she was, & everyone threatens bad review but do not say why this action happened
Hm... I can understand why she cancelled but I would not have done that. It's not like she has another job lined up, so the day will either be gone or it will go ahead, in which case she can earn some money. I'd have called on the day and asked where I am supposed to be. Similar things happen a lot on my job (also self-employed) and it's annoying not to be able to plan ahead, but not SUCH a big deal. In the end she does not have the income and a bad review.
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