“AITA For Telling My Neighbor To Get Over It When I Wake Her Baby Up?”
Having a kid around entails some tip-toeing. Mostly it’s on the parents’ side, but the neighbors are kinda expected to not shove branches into the wheels of a moving bicycle by making noise and disturbing the kid’s numerous naps and sleepy times throughout the day.
But we live in a noisy world and hearing things is simply unavoidable, so expectations have to be curbed to some extent. But not for this family, who decided that the neighbor can try even harder at not making noise, despite them already going above and beyond about, leading to an Am I The A-Hole story.
More Info: Reddit
Having a kid does mean tip-toeing so as to not wake them up, but the kid will have to learn to live with noise sooner or later
Image source: John Schuster (not the actual photo)
Reddit user u/MelodicStrategy1569 not too long ago shared a story of how they and their neighbor had a bit of a conflict regarding the noise that Melodic had been generating and waking the neighbors’ baby.
The story goes that Melodic’s neighbors had their baby recently, and Melodic decided that they ought to change some of their habits to accommodate for this change—if anything, out of respect and care for the new family member next door.
So, they did things like stop playing their drums past 6PM and even went ahead and installed some acoustic insulation in their “rumpus room”. A very nice gesture, especially since it was all their initiative.
This one family chose “later” and started pestering their neighbor for making too much noise, and the neighbor retaliated with “get over it”
Image source: MelodicStrategy1569
But, some noise was unavoidable, especially when the garage is just 3 meters away from the neighbor’s bedroom, where the kid rests. The main noise factors are the garage door, which beeps 4 times within a span of 20 seconds, and, according to OP, the noise is minimal; and their car, which OP called an “enthusiast’s” car—quite likely a sports car that is louder than most (they also mention the muffler is aftermarket).
Anywho, OP did make an effort to minimize the noise, but that turned out to not be enough for the family next door, as one Saturday, OP got to playing their drums at about lunch time in the insulated rumpus room, which turns out to be on the opposite end, meaning that the baby couldn’t possibly awaken from the minimal vibrations that the noise generates. But that was enough for the neighbors to come hollering.
OP did try to accommodate for the situation by installing acoustic insulation at home and adjusting their noise habits
Image source: MelodicStrategy1569
The buildup leading to this also included one time the neighbor parked their car a tad bit too close to OP’s house, meaning that they couldn’t park their car in their garage, meaning that they wouldn’t be opening the garage door, meaning they wouldn’t be waking the kid up. The car got towed. And this was also after they had talked about how parking outside is not an option for OP because of recent car thefts.
So, back to Saturday, the neighbor mom came over, saying she’d had enough of Melodic’s noise, and Melodic had had enough as well, leading to them saying “get over it”. The story soon appeared on r/AITA, asking folks who’s wrong here.
Alas, that didn’t help as the mom still went ballistic on them one Saturday
Image source: MelodicStrategy1569
And the AITA community ruled that OP’s not the jerk in this situation. Most agreed that they have been very reasonable with minimizing noise, doing more than what an average person would in this situation.
Others kept criticizing the neighbor parents for not teaching their newborn to sleep in a noisy setting and being overly sensitive about any noise. Sure, some babies can be more sensitive to noise than others, but it goes a long way if the baby develops a tolerance for noise early on.
It didn’t help the situation that the neighbor was a car enthusiast, but, oddly enough, the parents didn’t have a problem with the car itself
Image source: Chris Tina Bruce (not the actual photo)
Folks online ruled that OP was not a jerk, and in fact they went above and beyond in this situation
There was also a mom of an 8-month-old who ventured to guess that it’s not really the noise—if it’s already minimal and even dampened more by the neighboring walls—it might be the headlights that are actually causing a problem, so black-out curtains ought to do the trick. Oh, and a noise machine does wonders.
The post soon went viral, gaining nearly 16,000 upvotes and a handful of Reddit awards as of this article. You can take a look at the post and all of the responses in context here, and read other Am I The A-Hole stories we’ve covered here.
But before you do that, why not let us know your thoughts on who’s the jerk here in the comment section below!
My neighbors have a toddler. I have a garage full of power tools. When they first moved in, I asked a few times about when naptime and bedtime were. The mom laughed and said they had a white noise machine in the nursery that let the baby sleep through *everything* and she wasn't even worried about my squealy compound miter saw. This neighbor either needs to buy a 5-acre estate, or get the kid accustomed to sound. Upside: if the baby really is that sensitive to noise, you know there won't be a second one coming anytime soon...
Saw this story a while back, newborn was real cranky around 5. Mom did her best to give the best quiet time to get the baby to sleep. One evening she was so busy trying to get dinner ready and corral the older children. So she gave up and put the baby on the floor in the kitchen so she could finish. The baby went right to sleep and deeply too. She realized that was what the baby 'heard in the last weeks of the pregnancy. Having it TOO quiet was unsettling and most likely upsetting 'him' as to be not normal. Once the noise was around him, he relaxed, she thought. So keep the routine, normal sounds around, that may just what the baby needs to help them sleep better (not worst).
Load More Replies...Definitely NTA. It seems the neighbour might have become irrational due to lack of sleep. I know I'm much more patient and sane when I get a good night's sleep, than when I haven't slept well. It's one of the top reasons why I never wanted kids. If I didn't get any sleep for a long period of time, I might be driven to murder.
Funny you should say that about the lack of sleep. I am a terrible sleeper and always have been as long af I can remember. Contrary to what others might think, I think it made me better adjusted to deal with the sleep disruptions brought on by a baby waking through the night. More times than not I was already awake when the baby woke up. I wasn't any more sleep deprived than before I had the baby. Interestingly enough friends who are good sleepers complain more about being woken up in the middle of the night after having a baby. I was like, sleep deprivation? I got this.
Load More Replies...NTA she made the mistake on day one of trying to have it all quiet around baby. I found out from my first that this is just impossible. By time my second came around I went about everything normal ..baby got used to noises and was able to sleep through them. It’s one of the biggest mistakes new parents make.
My neighbors have a toddler. I have a garage full of power tools. When they first moved in, I asked a few times about when naptime and bedtime were. The mom laughed and said they had a white noise machine in the nursery that let the baby sleep through *everything* and she wasn't even worried about my squealy compound miter saw. This neighbor either needs to buy a 5-acre estate, or get the kid accustomed to sound. Upside: if the baby really is that sensitive to noise, you know there won't be a second one coming anytime soon...
Saw this story a while back, newborn was real cranky around 5. Mom did her best to give the best quiet time to get the baby to sleep. One evening she was so busy trying to get dinner ready and corral the older children. So she gave up and put the baby on the floor in the kitchen so she could finish. The baby went right to sleep and deeply too. She realized that was what the baby 'heard in the last weeks of the pregnancy. Having it TOO quiet was unsettling and most likely upsetting 'him' as to be not normal. Once the noise was around him, he relaxed, she thought. So keep the routine, normal sounds around, that may just what the baby needs to help them sleep better (not worst).
Load More Replies...Definitely NTA. It seems the neighbour might have become irrational due to lack of sleep. I know I'm much more patient and sane when I get a good night's sleep, than when I haven't slept well. It's one of the top reasons why I never wanted kids. If I didn't get any sleep for a long period of time, I might be driven to murder.
Funny you should say that about the lack of sleep. I am a terrible sleeper and always have been as long af I can remember. Contrary to what others might think, I think it made me better adjusted to deal with the sleep disruptions brought on by a baby waking through the night. More times than not I was already awake when the baby woke up. I wasn't any more sleep deprived than before I had the baby. Interestingly enough friends who are good sleepers complain more about being woken up in the middle of the night after having a baby. I was like, sleep deprivation? I got this.
Load More Replies...NTA she made the mistake on day one of trying to have it all quiet around baby. I found out from my first that this is just impossible. By time my second came around I went about everything normal ..baby got used to noises and was able to sleep through them. It’s one of the biggest mistakes new parents make.
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