We humans are big fans of recognizing patterns. “Fans” is an understatement. Our comparatively gargantuan brains and this noticing of patterns is one of the key things that helped us survive and evolve to where we are today.
What I’m getting to is that we notice things and sometimes falsely attach them to others. So when we see a sign, we expect it to be informative, concise, official… But sometimes they’re anything but.
Today, we’ve collected a whole bunch of these signs that are so useless, they become hilarious.
More info: Reddit
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This Monstrosity
No S**t Sherlo... Wait... Cake?
Simple. You'd be more inclined to drive carefully if you have a cake in your car than if you didn't.
Dang Was Scheduling To Have A Heart Attack There Gotta Go Somewhere Else I Guess
If you said “God, please send me a sign” and got one of these, what would you do? Actually, how do people even understand that a sign sent is one from God? After all, most signs we get are either for advertisers vying for our attention or road construction workers.
Enough of the theology tangent now. But the fact that we expect signs to be from certain sources is important in our case. It’s likely what makes these signs so strange and funny at the same time.
That’s especially true for metal plaques. They’ve got this air of officiality about them, so when you see one advertising itself as having “sharp edges,” it’s even more funny.
Nothing Happened
I've seen this sign in a dozen places across the country. Probably sold on Amazon.
Seen On A Delivery
There are lots of unexpectedly odd signs around the world. A lot of them are for nationally widespread animals crossing the road. These could be llamas, hedgehogs, oryxes (a kind of antelope), camels or even kangaroos.
You probably don’t encounter them every day, but they’re a good reminder of the fact that the world we live in doesn’t belong to us alone and that we’re actually sharing it with millions of other creatures. It goes without saying that you should slow down for them.
Well, Obviously!
I Live In A Very Classy Area
Damn I Was Planning On Playing Football There
All this talk about animal signs may have gotten you thinking about why animals such as deer have a certain tendency of freezing on the road. A lot of people think that they’re simply “stupid” or stubborn.
The truth is, especially at night, a deer’s pupils are fully dilated to take in as much nighttime light as possible, so when your high beams hit their eyes, they become blind for a second. Well, not really a second, they stand there for as long as it takes for their eyes to adjust and they begin seeing again.
And to the people making fun of their intelligence - they may not be the sharpest horn in the forest, but they’ve been here before us and at the rate we’re abusing the planet, they’ll be here after us.
Guess Some Hotels Charge?
Thanks For The Heads Up
He Could’ve Just Called Me
People are certainly no strangers to funny signs, though. If you were to take a casual stroll across a full parking lot, you’d likely see loads of them. You’d probably see some recurring ones, but also many unique ones, ones with hidden and never-before-seen meanings.
There’s a fair share of them that are absolutely unfunny to the max, but there are also some ironic ones that are worthy of a smile.
You can find loads of these suckers on Amazon, like “narcissist on board” and “I’m naked from the waist down.” Who could forget “nutter on board” too. Simply charming.
Thank Goodness For The Sign. I Almost Used The Basin
In Case There Was Any Doubt
Sale!
I Would Have Died If Not For The Stop Sign. Obviously
The existence of this sign implies that any road not ending in a stop sign is free game
Unnecessary Instructions
Would Have Been Lost Without This Sign.. Lucky Me
Instructions For Santa In Case The Milk And Cookies Were Confusing
No Smoking In The Designated Smoking Area Guys!
This Felt Good Because I Was At The Post Office
So Confused, Guess I'm Stuck Here!
Deer Can Read, Right?
This has to be the most infuriating one on the list. Putting out a pile of food for local wildlife then shooting that wildlife seems more like baiting (which is against the law here in WA) and the sign seems like a poor attempt at covering their @$$
Might As Well Not Have Bothered With The Sign 😁
What Time Do You Think They Close ?
Broken
That'll Teach Em!
Which Way Tho?
We Wanted To Tell You...nothing At All
This just in: Audi has pounced Bouche's tail yet again! Tired of his shenanigans, Bouche jumped into the bathroom sink to enjoy a nap. Audi followed her to the sink and fell asleep on top of her. Bouche began grooming Audi, to point out that she's the queen cat of the sink. He gave her the same look I gave my mother when she'd spit on a tissue to wash my face. Audi decided it would be much more fun to play climb the soft can-opener, and climbed out of the sink. Bouche is now enjoying her kitten-free napping time. Audi was distracted by a bit of fluff that desperately needed to be killed, and is determinedly stalking it. Updates at ten and twelve.
Well... What Are You Going To Do About It?
Why Have The Sign If You Don’t Want People Throwing Stones?
also do not throw Beatles, Gerry and the Pacemakers or Dave Clark Five at this sign
Thanks For The Clarification
No Cars
How Could Anyone Find The Pyramid Without This Very Helpful Sign???
Long Beach State. Don't ask, I never understood why, either.
Load More Replies...True. Without that sign I'd never notice the massive.gleaming, pyramid that loomed up there, right in front of me.
Time
Yeah I Don't Know What To Do Here
Tempting
Useless Trail Sign
Finally, after 10 days stuck in the bush, I was saved! I could finally rejoin civilization! Oh, to eat a buttered bagel again! This sign will show me... the... way...
Do Not Unplug
Couldn’t Have Done It Without You, Sign
Mmmm, Yes. Good Note
Watch Me
This Sign Reminding Me That The Stairs Go Down
This Sign Exists Solely To Legally Disclaim The Existence Of This Sign
I Had Completely Forgotten And Am Thankful For The Reminder
https://media04.myhe...0/8600070_L.jpg ••• Dogs must be kept on a leash - Except guide dogs for the blind
Some of these are less "useless", and more "completely misunderstood by the OPs and many of the commenters". Which...I suppose IS actually pretty useless, now that I think about it, because if people can't understand the message your sign is trying to convey, then your sign isn't very useful after all, is it? Words are hard sometimes...
https://media04.myhe...0/8600070_L.jpg ••• Dogs must be kept on a leash - Except guide dogs for the blind
Some of these are less "useless", and more "completely misunderstood by the OPs and many of the commenters". Which...I suppose IS actually pretty useless, now that I think about it, because if people can't understand the message your sign is trying to convey, then your sign isn't very useful after all, is it? Words are hard sometimes...