For us, Christmas is about giving our loved ones the affection and attention that they deserve. Human beings are very social creatures, and acts of kindness are our bread and butter: it’s the glue that holds us all together. Without altruism and self-sacrifice, there would be no civilization as we know it. And without gifts to show how much we care, it would be far harder to build trust.

Bored Panda reached out to writer and happiness expert Ariane for her opinion on how to focus on what truly matters in life. We were interested to get her take on how we can remember to show how much we love our nearest and dearest throughout the year, and not just when Christmas rolls around.

“It's difficult as life often gets in the way. But I try to do something nice for my daughter each week,” the author of ‘The How of Happy’ opened up to Bored Panda. Some of the small, kind things she does is buy her daughter her fave chocolate and leave her a nice message on their message boards.

It’s the intent and emotions behind the gift rather than the physical gift itself that’s important.

“It doesn't have to be an extravagant gift or gesture—something as small as a kindly note can lift their spirits. Also, pay attention to what they say and do and ask them about it. 'How did the concert go?' or, 'Is your aunt feeling better now?' shows that you care and listen to what they say,” Ariane said that our time and attention are invaluable. They’re what matters, not the price tag or the wrapping paper.

We also wanted to understand why people give out gifts at all. Writer Ariane was kind enough to illuminate this for us.

“It's a physical demonstration of our love and shows that we care about them. But again, gifts don't have to be expensive—you can give the gift of time and effort instead,” she told Bored Panda.

“So you can make cards, a photo book, or fill a jar with scraps of paper containing happy memories or loving sentiments. Often these homemade gifts will mean more to the recipient than lavish presents,” she explained what we can do if we feel like we can’t come up with any original ideas for good gifts.

Finally, Bored Panda asked Ariane about how someone might start to learn how to be kind and charitable if they’re unsure of where to start.

“Like Ebenezer Scrooge? I think you need three ghosts to come and visit you on Christmas Eve!” she quipped, adding that it’s best to take small steps.

“Maybe start with cards, then graduate to gifts and gestures. But one of the greatest gifts you can give is truly listening to people. Just giving them your time,” the author of ‘The How of Happy,’ said.

“Maybe invite them round, make them a pot of their favorite tea and biscuits, and have a catchup? And then, if they invite you back to theirs, bring a thoughtful gift you know they'll love,” Ariane said how we can lay the groundwork for a long-lasting, solid relationship.

Previously, Bored had spoken to priest and psychologist Dr. Fraser Watts, about the spirit of giving.

He explained that if we ever happen to receive a gift we’re not entirely happy with, we ought to imagine what our loved ones felt when choosing or making it. We should value the effort they put in, not the actual physical thing.

Meanwhile, during an earlier interview, Vanessa King, the Head of Psychology at ‘Action for Happiness,’ told Bored Panda that people keep themselves happy when they go out of their way to help others.

What’s more, there’s an evolutionary basis for altruism. When we’re kind to eat other, we build trust and maintain our social relationships with other members of the group. Meanwhile, our biology rewards us for this. “When we do things for others, it activates the reward center in the brain, so when we give a gift, it feels the same as receiving a gift,” she explained.

As we're covered recently on Bored Panda, gifts aren't essential for happy and healthy relationships. Though, if you're with someone who places a lot of importance on them, you can use the act of gift-giving as a way to show that you care about them and that you understand what they value.

Far more important than all of this, however, is helping the people you care about feel loved, understood, appreciated, wanted, and respected.

How are you celebrating the holidays this year, dear Pandas? Did you find the presents that you wanted underneath the Christmas tree? What are your plans this jolly weekend? Tell us a bit about it all in the comments. Merry Christmas!