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When two people decide to have a wedding, everyone and their grandma feel like they can chime in with their opinions. There are a lot of elements to consider: the venue, the catering, the dresses, the cakes. Guests have lots of conundrums too, including gifts, bridal parties, outfits, and many more. Out of these many elements, there are bound to be some that at least one or two people don't like.

However, they can't tell the bride and groom directly – that just wouldn't be polite, would it? Luckily, people can always come online to vent. So, when one person asked, "What is your unpopular wedding opinion?", folks could finally share their hot takes without fear. From dress codes to wedding favors and cringy rhyming signs, people had lots of controversial opinions.

To make this read more fun, Bored Panda reached out to wedding planner and the owner of Confetti & Co. Kendra Coons. She was kind enough to have a chat with us about wedding planning and why some brides turn into bridezillas. She also shared a wholesome story from her many years as a wedding planner!

#1

“What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Stretching yourself financially and having a wedding outside of your means is a terrible way to start your marriage.

yungMED , Lukas Report

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Alexandra
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No doubt about it. In such cases, it's about the wedding and not the marriage, I suspect. Why pay for a lavish wedding if you could use the money as a down payment for a house or something equally useful and long-lasting?

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Wedding planner Kendra Coons tells Bored Panda that wedding planning is all about managing stress. "Yours and the clients," she emphasizes. "Often, we act as a buffer between the client and the other vendors – so if the other vendors drop the ball, you need to be able to act quickly to fix the problem or come up with a gentle way to break the news to your clients."

"You need to be very compassionate and flexible to ensure your clients get the best possible experience! Being extremely organized and friendly also helps!" To Kendra, wedding planning is much more than just a job. "I get to witness the best day of someone's life over and over again, and it is truly an honor to work alongside my clients and their families!"

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    #2

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Speeches should be more like toasts. 60 seconds or less, done by three people or less. I can’t handle the cringe of speeches longer than that.

    redredredwild , Vladimir Konoplev Report

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    Definitely a Human
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Worst one I've seen was a wedding speech where the groom read a letter from his relatives. 4 pages. In polish. He and his parents were the only polish speakers at the wedding

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    #3

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Doing a million pre-wedding events. Engagement party, bachelorette party, bachelors party, bridal shower, rehearsal dinner… bro just get married, why are you stalling??

    deadgirlshoes , Alina Levkovich Report

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    Emma S
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bridal showers and rehearsal dinners seem to be an American thing. At least, i've never heard of anyone doing those in the UK. Couples here tend to just have stag and hen nights (what we call bachelor and bachlorette parties) and then the wedding a few weeks later.

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    Perhaps the biggest stereotype about weddings is the bridezilla, the monster version of the bride. Reality shows, movies, and other media would have us believe that many women inevitably start acting like fictional reptilian monsters the closer they get to their wedding, but Kendra says that the reality is much more grounded. And the stereotype (like Godzilla, ironically) has pretty short legs.

    "I don't think that most 'bridezillas' are bad people," Coons tells us. "I think that the stress of planning a large-scale, once-in-a-lifetime event can manifest in different ways for everyone!"

    "For the most part, when you really dig into what the issue is, it's not the client being difficult for the sake of being difficult. There is a lot of pressure and stress, especially on brides, so it is reasonable to expect that some will have an 'inconvenient' reaction to that."

    #4

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Having a bridal party isn't worth it.

    I'm going to have my best friends there on that day, but I don't need to put them through the headache of spending a lot on a dress, walking down the aisle alone, and throwing me parties (bridal and bachelorette).

    I just want them to show up, chill, laugh, drink, eat, dance, and have a good time.

    KSwe117 , iam luisao Report

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    #5

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Justifying having a wedding on a weeknight or in a remote (but cheaper to you) location as “If people love you, they’ll make the effort to come.”


    Just because I don’t want to spend over $1k on flights and hotels to to attend a destination wedding don’t mean I don’t love the bride and groom. It means I’m prioritizing how I spend my money and limited vacation time.

    LittleOrangeCat , Asad Photo Maldives Report

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    BROmanicus85
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A wedding day should be about the bride and the groom, but sometimes people make it ALL about themselves, disregarding basic human decency and common sense...

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    #6

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) If you wouldn’t buy dinner for them any other time then don’t invite them to the wedding.

    mycatdeku , Filipp Romanovski Report

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    Regina Holt
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This actually does make so much sense. This "gotta invite everyone" c**p is just stupid.

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    We also asked Kendra to share a wholesome wedding story, preferably one where no unreasonable decisions ruined the vibe. And while Kendra says that every wedding is full of wholesome stories, one is still stuck in her mind. "Six weeks prior to my clients' wedding, their venue declared bankruptcy and closed. They were left scrambling and having given a significant amount of their budget to the original venue."

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    "Their friends, family, and vendors rallied to find a new venue for them. We ended up securing their first choice of venue, but they hadn't gone ahead with it because, at the time, they would not have been able to have an outdoor wedding. It was stressful and heartbreaking, but in the end, they had the most magical day of their lives, and everything came together perfectly," the wedding planner reminisces.

    #7

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I don’t care if guests of my wedding wear outfits that’s have white in it. Unless you are showing up in a 100% white hall gown, your floral midi dress is fine.

    autumnflowers13 , Pavel Danilyuk Report

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    Regina Holt
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I let my maid of honor (my sister) wear a bridesmaid dress that she had worn to a previous wedding.

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    #8

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Getting legally married before the wedding and not telling anyone is perfectly acceptable. I don’t understand why people are so against this here.

    evolutionofafoodie , Gayani Anuththara Report

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    Katrin Krueger
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Germany, you have to do this. Standesamt is the only legal way to get married, the church ceremony is just to top it off.

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    #9

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I think it is unfair to put so much pressure on the bride to have her father walk her down the aisle and do a big father-daughter dance. Not every bride has a close relationship with their father.

    itiswineoclock , Breno Cardoso Report

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    Emma S
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad died 5 years ago, so that would be a very bizarre dance. 😆

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    #10

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Mother of the bride dresses do not need to be so god damn ugly. Mature doesn’t mean bulky, over done and covered up as a nun in church. Like yeesh i see everyone selling the same ugly dress it’s almost offensive.

    hentaihoneyyy420 , Mermek Avitia Report

    #11

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Vendors that own their business and set their own prices have no business expecting tips.

    Wendyroooo , Miguel Á. Padriñán Report

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    Ace
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't get it - what's a 'vendor' doing there anyway? Set up, deliver whatever, disappear, clear up afterwards as appropriate. Tipping staff at a wedding or any other event would be ludicrous.

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    #12

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Wedding favours aka fancy garbage.

    anon , Rick Rosenthal Report

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At a friend's wedding, the bride's mother crocheted flowers as wedding favours. They were attached to each place card. They were beautiful, and I appreciated the amount of work that had gone into them. After the wedding, I sewed broach clips to the back of the flowers. The bride and groom were delighted to see me wearing the crocheted flower.

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    #13

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I've never enjoyed a wedding favor unless it was edible. I don't want anything with your name engraved on it. Favors are almost always a waste of money.

    Lava_Lemon , Rene Asmussen Report

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    Alecto76
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For my mom's wedding to my step-dad (in their 60s) they had about 40 people for a reception. My mom and I bought little jars, glitter...and little plastic bride and groom figures and made snow globes. They were a hit. And we scattered some special ones in the crowd - headless couple, bride and groom with a few floating heads, groom's head in a bouquet, etc.. - we had a lot of extra figures. A lot of work, but each time I look at my two headed bride snow globe, I remember what a nice reception it was.

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    #14

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I don’t really care about pics! I want some, of course. But I don’t need 8 hours of someone following me around taking pics of everything. And I’d rather spend time with guests and have candids then spend tons of time taking pics.

    I still remember a bride on here who essentially missed her entire wedding bc she was taking pics…getting ready, 1st look, cocktail hour, then left dinner to do golden hour pics, then did more bridesmaids pics…she didn’t talk to all her guests bc she was busy with pics!!!

    BrooklynBride27 , Masood Aslami Report

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    Petro Roos
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That seems over the top. The traditional "timetable" for wedding photography goes like this where I'm from: Photos while getting ready with bridesmaids and sometimes mom (if they want, there could be a 2nd photographer with the groom or the 1 photographer will split their time, if the couple is getting ready at the same venue). Some photos at the ceremony While the guests are mingling and getting welcome snacks, the bride and groom have their shoot (which should not take longer than an hour) This is also where the parents and wedding parties get involved for the first few shots. Then the couple is off to join the guests at the reception. IF the couple wants, the latest "trend" then is to have the guest join the bride and groom "table for table" for a photo, that way everyone gets a photo with the couple (a lot less "personal"). And that's it, the rest of the time the photographer is there for the spontaneous shots, the speeches, dances. The couple gets a lot more time with the guests.

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    #15

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Unpopular opinions incoming:

    1) if you want your bridesmaids to wear a particular outfit, you should buy it for them. Maybe it’s because I’m not from a culture that does bridesmaids, but the idea of making someone spend money to be in your wedding is silly as hell to me. Why can’t they just stand up in their own clothes?

    2) wearing an outfit just once is wasteful. If it can’t be altered to wear again, then donate or sell it, why hang on to something that can’t be worn?

    3) destination bachelorettes are extremely fun and I love attending them. But I don’t see why everyone pays for the bride? I would feel uncomfortable accepting that from my friends. Imo the fairest way is for everyone to split the costs, but let the itinerary be dictated by the bride’s likes and dislikes.

    4) yes, a wedding is your day, but in my personal opinion, it’s also a very important day for your family and loved ones. I think their wishes/requests should be accommodated if possible, within reason, even if they aren’t paying. Guest experience is also important, IMO. For your guests, no matter how much they love you, things like - ease of getting to the venue, food quality/quantity/timing, drinks (I personally don’t like the idea of a cash bar at all, I would rather do a restricted-option open bar), availability of seating (maybe more of a problem in Indian weddings) etc. is far more important than anything else and will impact the way they remember your wedding.

    5) if you invite drama fuelled, opinionated people along when you are buying a wedding dress, you will bring that unpleasantness upon yourself. It doesn’t matter how closely related they are. Also don’t bring too many people along. Having 1-3 opinions is more than enough. Too many opinions just means that you’ll be overwhelmed or pushed in a direction you don’t want to be in.

    all-you-need-is-love , Eko Agalarov Report

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    Regina Holt
    Community Member
    7 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I totally agree with numbers 1 and 2. When I got married, my sister was my maid of honor, no other bridesmaids. My sister wore a dress that she had worn to a previous wedding as bridesmaid. As for number 5, I bought my wedding dress at a mall. It was actually a prom dress, $100. I was shopping alone

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    #16

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Getting ready pictures are stupid and I don't know why they became a thing. Why would I want pictures of myself and my bridesmaids in bathrobes? Why would I want pictures of the groom tying his shoes? We hired our photographer for 8 hours, and she was baffled when I told her that we're not doing getting ready photos. "But...don't you want a picture of your mom zipping up your dress?" Um, no, I prefer to get dressed in private. I'd much rather have pictures of us at the actual wedding, when we're all dressed up at the beautiful venue. We'll look much better at that point 😂

    Besides, hair and makeup would have to finish an hour earlier if we wanted to do getting ready pictures. As it is, we had to be ready 2 hours before the ceremony for the first look and family/bridal party photos. Now we're expected to get ready even earlier just to take bathrobe pictures in a hotel room? Those are not pictures I'm going to frame or put in an album.

    TigerzEyez85 , Wayne Fotografias Report

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    Angela C
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It seems unnecessary nowadays. If you really want photos of that part you can take them on a cell phone. Save the professional photos for the ceremony and reception

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    #17

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) The push for personal vows - some people just aren't comfortable sharing their raw emotions like that, or maybe they're not great with words. We umm'd and ahh'd for a long time as to whether to do personal vows or not - my husband is ASD and found it to be a very intimidating prospect. I was fine either way, and we ended up writing short little speeches for each other (he wanted to in the end), but while we were deciding, any one we told were HORRIFIED that we might just be using *gasp* generic vows written by the *gag* celebrant.

    LadyOfHouseBacon , Taylor Thompson Report

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    Sunshine Lady
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Personal vows are not a thing where I live. We just repeat after the person, who leads the ceremony.

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    #18

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Wedding dress trains are THE WORST! It’s like lugging around a big brontosaurus tail all night.

    Sciurus_Aberti , TranStudios Photography & Video Report

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people like a train. But the best dresses with trains are the ones where the train is either detachable, or can be held up, out of the way with a couple of buttons.

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    #19

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I don’t really like kids as ring bearers/flower girls, especially way-too-young ring bearers and flower girls. If they can’t make it down the aisle to do the thing on their own, what’s the point? I also don’t think it’s cute when they cry/have a meltdown because they can’t handle it, like why are they being put a situation they clearly can’t emotionally handle? It just makes me feel bad for them!! I thought about having my dogs do those jobs for me, but decided against it because I didn’t think it was a good situation for them, and I genuinely wonder if some of these small kids have ever gotten the same consideration.

    mother_of_doggos35 , Taha Samet Arslan Report

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    Jesse
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Depends. I was six when I had the flower girl duty and I did not throw a tantrum

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    #20

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Crazy amount of decorating. We didn't do it. Had the venue give some ideas of center pieces we could rent. That was it. No flowers, not elaborate center pieces, none of it. I also didn't have to store and sell it all after.

    dtshockney , Matheus Bertelli Report

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    Dorothy Reiser
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My son and wife had potted plants on each table, which they did themselves, then donated to the venue which was a retreat in the mountains.

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    #21

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) If family doesn't reach out to the couple (or at least their related half) at least once a year (some folks require more im just putting somethingout there), they don't get an invitation. You aren't entitled to an invite just bc you're the aunt or the grandpa. Act like you care.

    anon , Jonathan Borba Report

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    Alexandra
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uhm, not sure I agree about grandparents. Mine were quite old and happy to hear from us and have us visit them (always very short, because they were fragile), but they themselves were content in their own little world. Of course we invited them and they attended the church-part for which we were grateful.

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    #22

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I’m not sure if any of these are genuinely unpopular, but I think these are my wedding opinions that are the most controversial/I know not everyone agrees:

    1. When you invite people to a wedding you should see yourself as hosting guests and behave accordingly. Yes it’s your day! But you are also hosts.

    2. I feel like it’s become very trendy to criticize certain aspects of wedding planning as being excessive because it’s “only one day,” and my opinion is that a wedding is for many people a once in a lifetime cultural and social milestone worthy of celebrating, and no one should feel bad about planning an expensive event just because the event is one day long.

    ConsistentCheesecake , Jay jay Redelinghuys Report

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    Ace
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With you on #1 for sure, #2 well, maybe, but some of the best wedding's I've attended have also been some of the cheapest. It's not about the cost.

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    #23

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) The chokehold that rhymes have on wedding signage kills me. No hate if you’ve done them, but they give me an ick.

    “No need to pick a side, you’re all loved by the groom and bride.”

    “A little treat for your dancing feet. Take some shoes and bust a move.”

    “Blow bubbles of good wishes as we exit as Mr. and Mrs.”

    And just… most signage being entirely unnecessary. We don’t need 800 signs giving us instructions in a hard to read cursive font on clear acrylic sheets.

    LilBennedy , Chapin Jones Report

    #24

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Clear acrylic signs on an easel are so hard to read just get a normal sign.

    kmeghan , chasinghlife Report

    #25

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I've never had a wedding cake that I felt tasted even remotely good - and it blows my mind the amount people spend on those things.

    egnards , Jeremy Wong Report

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    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When she was younger, Mom made wedding cakes. She also gave them to relatives and close friends getting married. Hers were always delicious as well as pretty.

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    #26

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I love kids but from my experience they will ruin your wedding ceremony and steal the show.

    MysteriousDirt2 , Rene Asmussen Report

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've never been to a wedding where the children have ruined the wedding. It was always drunken adults who put a dampener on the event. Always.

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    #27

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) Summer is the worst season to attend a wedding.

    Same_Independent_393 , Asad Photo Maldives Report

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This totally depends on where the wedding is taking place! If summer in your part of the world means blisteringly hot temperature, then yes, it would be terrible, but if summer is 18-22 degrees, no rain, and lots of light, then summer is a brilliant time to marry.

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    #28

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I don't like veils. It feels antiquated.

    Sea-Professional-594 , Tim Mossholder Report

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    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think veils are romantic, but I'm not ever going to get married, so my opinion is as good as a bald man's opinion on hairbrushes.

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    #29

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I hope I don’t get murdered for this lol but I 100% believe in reciprocation of time/effort/money I put into someone else’s wedding.

    You asked me to drop $500 on a hotel for your bachelorette weekend? Get ready to shell out for my air bnb. You had your wedding in some rural town that I had to drive 3 hours from the closest airport to get to? Yeah I expect you to travel to my wedding. Nothing less than $200 on your registry? I’m gonna judge when you buy the cheapest thing off mine for like $40.

    Totally doesn’t apply to people where I haven’t done it for them first, but if you expect something from other people you better be prepared to reciprocate it.

    generally_here , Pixabay Report

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    Lyoness
    Community Member
    7 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think there's a reason it's an unpopular opinion. The idea that you only give if you're going to get the same $ amount back is cringey. Just my opinion. Edit: spelling

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    #30

    “What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers) I see nothing wrong with a destination bachelorette. In fact, I wish I was invited to more! I work hard to afford girls trips, why wouldn't I love one with a THEME that I didn't need to pick and someone else puts together the location and itinerary? So exciting and always fun.

    IceColdPepsi1 , Yuliia Auer Report

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    Alexandra
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure, but not everyone has the financial means to be able to go on a destination bachelorette. Or do you propose that having the financial means is the criterium for an invitation and not the connection to the bride?

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