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Bored Panda spoke with Catdogbird29, a childfree and single woman who shared her experience in response to this thread on the Ask Women subreddit. She wrote: “I’m single with no children. I just booked a trip to NYC and one to Mexico in the summer, and am planning a trip to Europe for the fall. I’m thinking about getting a second masters degree and after seeing these responses, I’m thinking 'why the hell not?'” She also added that she has money and time to pursue her interests and because of that, she has gotten to know exactly who she is. “It turns out I like me a lot,” the woman added.

“I think there is a lot of societal pressure for women to get married,” Catdogbird29 told us. “The message that marriage and kids = happiness is literally everywhere in our lives, from the media, friends, and family. I felt growing up that my life would not be complete unless I got married and had kids, and it led me to make some decisions that were not in my best interest.”

Having said that, the woman believes that society is changing. “It is becoming more acceptable for women to stay single and childless, but there is still considerable pressure to ‘settle down.’”

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Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Living many lives. I was a morning baker at a corner bakery in a small town. I was a stripper in a big urban city. I was a roadie for a punk rock band. I was a manager in a large packaging warehouse. Now I'm a budtender at my corner potshop. I dont like a place? I get up and move across the country, sleep in my car until I find a job. I want to live a bunch more lives. I love the freedom and never want to give a shred of it up.

muffinmamners , Anh Tran Report

Final score:

186points

POST

Susie Elle 2 years ago

It sounds amazing, however I don't envy your lifestyle. I love freedom, but I'd feel lost not 'belonging' somewhere (that's from my perspective!). Reading this does tickle my travel-muscles though :D

66points

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Working to pay for my cats expenses

hellkittyx , Dietmar Ludmann Report

Final score:

171points

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Rissie 2 years ago

So you do have children.

109points

DuchessDegu 2 years ago

Furrier, quieter, cheaper, cuter kids yes!

15points

N Goodman 2 years ago (edited)

No, she has animals. Wait... Kids can be animals also. I have 6 of them 😂.

4points

amy hipps 2 years ago

Lol no. Our cats don't talk back and way less expensive than human kids.

1point

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Yep the best kind - only had to bail them out once for adoption! Food and love is all they expect!

1point

LNB87 2 years ago

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Felicity Goddard 2 years ago

Me also, I tell my cats that I have to go to work otherwise who is going to buy their snacks 🥰

9points

IguanaStampede 2 years ago

I thought this post was about women that said "No" to children. ;-)

5points

Mary Rose Kent 2 years ago

Two young kitties on the left and two old kitties on the right…old pets of any kind make my heart turn to mush!

4points

Carrie de Luka 2 years ago

Me too. I watch my old boy go up the stairs all stiff legged as he has dodgy knees now and my heart melts with love for him.

0points

Sheila Stamey 2 years ago

I thought we weren't choosing children in this list 😜

4points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

Goals!

2points

Mam cymraeg 2 years ago

As someone who has 3 daughter I totally endorse this and can I come live with you

1point

Karin Morris 2 years ago

I find it absolutely disgusting when people let cats on kitchen counters. You eat from food prepared in a kitchen and cats walk in cat litter. Don't you think about that? I don't let me dog on the counters... Ugh

0points

BORKADYMUSIC 2 years ago

Floofy children!

0points

Matt Ringer 2 years ago

beginning of the classic cat lady. lol

0points

Rissy cake 2 years ago

Ah yes, cats are best life

0points

Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

Not their photo. If it was, I'd question the rotting head of iceberg lettuce.

0points

Liv 2 years ago

😂 I feel attacked

0points

mosselyn , LinkedIn Sales Solutions Report

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I'm 60, never got married, never had kids. What have I done instead? Lived my best life. It's been fantastic, so far.

Had a successful career. Launched a successful second career in my 40s. Retired early (which I never could have done with a spouse and children). Travelled all over the world when I was younger. Indulged all my hobbies (reading, quilting, cooking, gaming).

As someone else so aptly put it: Whatever the f**k I want.

Final score:

160points

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SSG49 2 years ago

"Good for her!" -Lucille Bluth

40points

The Redditor also said that she learned that she likes being single and she generally doesn’t feel a lot of need to be in a relationship. “I realized after a bad breakup that I stayed in the relationship for so long because I felt like I ‘had to’ and I would be ‘unhappy’ if I wasn’t in a relationship. I felt worse when I thought I would ‘run out of time’ to have kids.”

Moreover, “It didn’t help that I didn’t have women in my life that were happy single, and I watched as they made compromise after compromise to make their male partners happy at their own expense. I thought this was just the way it was for women. Then, as I was healing from my breakup, I realized I was far happier on my own than I ever was when I was dating or in a relationship,” she said.

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I got married but I'm not ever having kids. My husband worked from home today and we drank margaritas in bed and booked a holiday. Aside from having the responsibility of a dog I pretty much do exactly what I want to. I'm aware some of that privilege comes from money, rather than not having kids, but not having them has afforded me an incredible amount of freedom and peace

Vegetable-Ad-647 , Toa Heftiba Report

Final score:

125points

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Susie Elle 2 years ago

Yes!

35points

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Rescuing animals. Have my own business. I read a lot. Pursue art. Wake up whenever I want. Go on long travel trips with my friends.

crescentcactus , Autri Taheri Report

Final score:

114points

POST

Shelli PL 2 years ago (edited)

Maybe just me but as a child of abuse I think it’s selfless to decide not to have kids. It was a nightmare to be raised by two selfish people who shouldn’t have procreated. I wanted my son bcuz I vowed to break the cycle and happily gave him a real childhood. Some choose to forgo that work. You never know if there’s more to their choice to be childless. Respect their decision.

106points

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Get 4 degrees (2masters and 1 Ph.D.), buy a house, move whenever I want for a better job opportunity or a promotion, relax after work, and on the weekend coz I can have a full night sleep.

I was married which was unfortunate.

tiny-bird-292 , Lesly Juarez Report

Final score:

112points

POST

Kris 2 years ago

lol. Unfortunate

56points

Catdogbird29 confessed that the quality of her life improved a lot after her breakup. “I no longer had to care for another person or make compromises about anything. What movie do I want to watch? What groceries do I want to buy? Where do I want to go for vacation? All my decisions.” Moreover, the woman started trying new hobbies and eating healthier. “My stress levels have dropped now that I’m single. I don’t see the same in my friends and family with kids.”

She believes that women in general take on so much of a mental workload when it comes to maintaining a relationship and care for children. “We hand ourselves over to make other people happier and we neglect ourselves and it isn’t fair. Society expects women to sacrifice for their husbands and children,” the Redditor explained. Although not all relationships have to be like this, Catdogbird29 said she doesn’t see equal partnerships modeled anywhere, “even among my friends and family that insist their relationships are different.”

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Living my best life? I always wanted kids, but I have been unlucky in love and having children is not something I want to do on a solo salary with me as the only caretaker. Unfortunately, the older I get the less patience I have with men. I have stopped dating during the pandemic and I don’t know if I will ever start up again! I have so many hetero friends in unhappy marriages where the women work full time, run the household, and are basically the only children caregiver. There are so many memes about married men acting like giant children so I feel I may have dodged a bullet. I’m sad I won’t get to be a mom, but i think it’s for the best. I don’t want to “raise” an adult or be disrespected by a man who is perfectly capable in the workplace but decides to tune me out in the running of our home.

So I do what I want and I’m really freaking happy. I own my own home, I have two degrees, I take lots of trips with my friends, have hobbies, love my job and coworkers, and dote on my nieces. It’s a great life!

adjur , averie woodard Report

Final score:

101points

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Liv 2 years ago

"I have so many hetero friends in unhappy marriages where the women work full time, run the household, and are basically the only children caregiver." This is unfortunately still far too common.

82points

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses 49 here. Self employed massage therapist, make my own hours, my own house, and make enough money to keep my 3 feline gluttons fat and happy. I’m solidly lower middle class with my income and I would be absolutely screwed if I had kids. The odds of single parenthood were just too high and I wasn’t willing to chance it. No regrets here.

FeatherLuck , Toa Heftiba Report

Final score:

94points

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Tess the ferret 2 years ago

Feline gluttons...omg im dying

43points

#10

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Eating chips and watching tv at 3am. I will wake up around 1pm tomorrow. I will go to my job as a bartender at 5pm tomorrow. By the end of the week I will joke that I'm tired of partying. But I won't actually be - I'm gonna dance to a DJ and destroy my ear drums this weekend, like I do every weekend.

thunderling , Helena Lopes Report

Final score:

86points

POST

Kookamunga 2 years ago

This whole post is making a lot of people uncomfortable by making them question their choices.

36points

HonestThoreauAway , Jonathan Borba Report

“I think the most common misconception about childfree and unmarried women is that we are bitter and jealous of our parent/married friends and family,” Catdogbird29 told us and added that she’s not at all. “I only want my loved ones to be happy and fulfilled and if that means getting married and having kids then I am happy for them. I will gladly hang out with you and your spouse, or babysit your kids for you. My friends are my friends regardless of their relationship status.”

Another misconception about childfree and single women is that they are lonely. “I’m not at all. I’m introverted by nature so I love my alone time. Sure, sometimes I wish I had a partner but I’ve seen just as many women desperate to get a moment of peace in their day. I know there are plenty of women that are bitter, jealous, and lonely, but I would encourage them to find whatever they are looking for in other people in themselves instead.” The Redditor wants to remind everyone that “You are a whole person. There is no 'other half' out there for you.”

#11

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Being a full person who isn't defined by what she provides for other people?

Final score:

80points

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Renita Fox 2 years ago

Wow ! Yes !

31points

#12

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Enjoying a free and happy solo life, travelling around, working for myself, publishing my own books and not answering to anyone else. I’ve never wanted children because I knew it would curtail my freedom. I’m 54 with no regrets (apart from an eight-year marriage in my thirties).

Reddish81 , freestocks Report

Final score:

75points

POST

Shelli PL 2 years ago

She chose a different path that worked for her. We should celebrate every woman’s freedom to decide her path. That’s the literal point of fighting for equality.

44points

#13

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I've worked full time in my career for 13 years. My master's degree helped that one out.

I became a homeowner at 21. I'm 38 now and am on my 3rd owned house.

I had a hysterectomy in 2020, so this whole "child free" thing is permanent.

I have a roommate; not because I need help paying bills, but because it makes my house more lively and I like the company.

I bought all the stuff to make an awesome home gym that I use 5x a week.

I do want a marriage, but am definitely not willing to settle for less than what I can already give myself. My quality of life will not diminish when I agree to be in a marriage.

souponastick , Brian Wangenheim Report

Final score:

73points

POST

Susie Elle 2 years ago

Just curious as it's none of my business, but I conclude from this that they started working in their career field at 25 - how were you able to afford a house at 21?? Even if they worked in a different field before that?

8points

squigglesmcwiggles , Louise Burton Report

#14

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I just bought my dream house a month ago and got a better job making more than double what I was making with a huge bonus. That would have never happened if I would have gotten married/ had kids with the man I was supposed to marry ( I called off the wedding and split).

I can pretty much do whatever I want to do.

My bf ( not the guy I was supposed to marry) and I go exploring all the time. We just pick a trail on the map we haven't done yet, leash the dogs, and go.

I also love dancing and can easily get prettied up, pick a dress, and hit the dance floor. Anything from ballroom to club I fit right in and have so much fun. I couldn't do that if I had kids.

I love having the freedom to literally just do whatever pops in my head.

My parents had 13 kids and that put me off having kids. I've raised enough of them already.

Final score:

67points

POST

Loty 2 years ago

You can summarize all the posts here with 1 line: Kids are Expensive.

39points

#15

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I have traveled to 20+ countries solo. Live in a poppin part of the city, bought a white couch, a luxury car, plan to retire early…but the most important thing I do is work remotely so I can visit my amazing nephews as often as I wish. I didn’t ‘choose’ to not follow the social norm of getting married/having kiddos, I’ve just dated piles of garbage that inherently prevented that from happening. Then one day I looked in the mirror and turned 40, so I suppose I’m now too late to the bio-kids party. Oh well!!!!

ApfelFarFromTree , Steven Lewis Report

Final score:

66points

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Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

Not too late. But not necessary for everyone, either.

26points

#16

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Working on my second and third bachelors and then onto a Ph.D. in political science with an emphasis on women's rights to get down to fixing this s**t for all of us.

Glittering-Bat353 , Brett Jordan Report

Final score:

63points

POST

A.J Milne 2 years ago

"Women rights are human right" - I think Michelle Obama

27points

#17

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Staying with my long term boyfriend for life. We may get married. We may not. I kinda just want to be engaged forever lol (and I want to get him an engagement ring too!)

We’re never having kids. Instead, we plan on traveling the world! And focusing on our careers and hobbies.

-doobert- , Jakob Owens Report

Final score:

59points

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Michael Sanders 2 years ago

Good plan if it works for you. Staying with a long term significant other can bring questions of “we’ve been together forever why not get married?”but also “we are doing just fine so why get married”. Answer those questions however you want, just be 100% sure the other person is on the same page.

15points

Wrong-Barracuda-223 Report

#18

Going to law school, taking care of my parents and focusing on my mental health. I’m very happy doing it and am just now beginning to accept that I don’t have to follow everyone’s expectations. There’s no reason to sacrifice your happiness making decisions that nobody but you will have to live with forever.

Final score:

50points

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Liv 2 years ago

Yes, this. Screw society's vision of how our lives should be like. It's our life, and our happiness that's at stake. Nothing against being a happy momma, but to have a conventional/traditional life due to external pressure, and to fulfill the expectations of others? To feel externally accepted, while feeling empty of joy and remorseful inside? Hell no.

18points

#19

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Currently, I’m drinking coffee and watching the sun rise. My house is on a mountain and I have a beautiful view. Also, I bought this house with cash.

On Friday I’m leaving for Vegas for a quick weekend trip.

Did I mention I quit my job a month ago because I didn’t feel like working there anymore? I started a new job this week but it was nice to take a month off to finish my office renovation.

Coder-Cat , Thibault Penin Report

Final score:

49points

POST

DUN DUN (she/her) 2 years ago

I lost half of my anxiety reading this

22points

RequirementBright33 , Michael Discenza Report

#20

Not being stressed over something called a “fertility clock”.

Impossible-Ad7229 Report

Final score:

47points

POST

#21

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I have a job which I actually like, party with friends, go alone on holidays, hookup and live my best life without a screaming poop monster holding me down.

Final score:

46points

POST

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

Poop monster lol

22points

#22

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Work a fulfilling career, volunteer at a wildlife rescue center, travel, cook, read, play the guitar, enjoy time with my fiancé and friends whenever I feel like it, regularly exercise, have frequent sex, invest my extra time and money into my health and skincare routine, sleep in, have spa days once a week, donate money to charity, hike, bike, ski, camp, and going dancing.

These are a few of the things I do instead of having kids lol

Other_Ad_8844 , Khuong Nguyen Report

Final score:

44points

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Brandy Grote 2 years ago

This one reminds me of the Dear Abby article I read as a kid: "pity the poor childless couple, she slaving to pour another mai tai as he lovingly puts sun lotion on her back..."

27points

#23

I did get married, but no kids. I'm about to start a PhD in aerospace!

throwra567235 Report

Final score:

43points

POST

Mighty Remolacha 2 years ago

you go, girl!!

13points

#24

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Moving to different states, changing careers because I feel like it, living a reasonably good life on 30k, and enjoying a banquet of men. I'm almost 50 and I have never felt I was missing out. A marriage of less than 3 years gave me a taste of that white picket fence life, and it's not for me.

Turnips4evr , Edward Cisneros Report

Final score:

42points

POST

Shelli PL 2 years ago

Is the banquet of men served buffet style or is the food placed strategically on the men and you just help yourself?

35points

#25

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Currently helping my sister raise her kid! She's a single mom by choice and I feel like I'm getting the best of both worlds right now. I love watching my nephew grow up and I feel like it's completely satisfying any maternal urges I have. And at the end of the day I still have my freedom and independence.

BrittLee8 , Omar Lopez Report

Final score:

40points

POST

Kirsten Kerkhof 2 years ago

I'm an auntie to two fantastic nephews and a fantastic niece. I've been their Friday babysitter since the oldest (now 7) was 3 months old so I've seen them grow up. They act up and can be stroppy as kids can be but they are adorable --- but I don't have to pay for more than the occasional banana. I get the best of kids who know and love me, but no broken nights and depleted bank account.

20points

#26

I’m building my dream home - an eclectic little tiny house on the water, that I’ll never have to share.

oozoo_ Report

Final score:

38points

POST

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

One word - AMEN!

1point

#27

I got a PhD, traveled, lost weight got mentally healthy, focused on myself, then found the love of my life and now we are building a dream house and planning a future without kids. Maybe we will get another dog.

aries2084 Report

Final score:

38points

POST

A.J Milne 2 years ago

Yes! Get a dog, preferably from a shelter🐶

25points

#28

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Halfway to a paid off house, living with my animals, successful in my career, dating someone that may or may not develop in to something long term.

There are more pros than cons for me to not being married with kids (and possibly divorced) in my 40s.

maybenotrelevantbut , Avi Naim Report

Final score:

36points

POST

BORKADYMUSIC 2 years ago

Who needs kids when you have animals? They’re like fluffy kids :D

2points

#29

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I live with my best friend, and it's f**king awesome.

SledgeGlamour Report

Final score:

36points

POST

Minxasaurus 2 years ago

Me too!

7points

scared_nursling , Tran Mau Tri Tam Report

#30

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Getting two degrees, working my a** off at a job I genuinely love even it's intense and stressful! I'm also helping my parents as they get older, building a bunch of furniture, writing silly s**t to unwind, and chilling with my cats.

I did have a very brief period of being married (which I didn't tolerate for long).

Final score:

31points

POST

MaryWinDenver Notgiven 2 years ago

Seventy-one here. Can never recall wanting kids, didn't even play with dolls. No desire to be married, but the exact right man came into my life, four years after I had a hysterectomy andhe was good with a state of childlessness. Got two degrees went to the top in two careers and I'm booking hotels for summer in Europe. And to His Holiness, yeah, no kids, just dogs and I'm selfish--bite it.

6points

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#31

Living alone, loving my independence. My home is full of art, plants, and I have many hobbies.

I would be miserable as a wife and mother. It was just never going to be the life for me!

jasmine-blossom Report

Final score:

16points

POST

#32

I'm a pilot, I have been wanting to for years since I was young. I also despise kids so that was out of the question. Instead I have many animals as I love them.

bestieflick Report

Final score:

14points

POST

#33

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I married fairly young (24) but we are openly childfree. I'm also the breadwinner and my husband works parttime and does almost all the household stuff.

I get to spend my evenings doing whatever I want. Playing games, chilling my my husband, going out and seeing friends.

Everything parents did before they had kids? I just kept doing that.

humdrumflagellum , Toa Heftiba Report

Final score:

13points

POST

Shelli PL 2 years ago

What’s the best temp to chill a husband?

3points

#34

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Being a lesbian and practicing witchcraft.

Sagasujin , Shingi Rice Report

Final score:

12points

POST

otplus 2 years ago

with this i just imagined that the whole premise of snow white may be a unrequited love from the evil queen

2points

#35

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Being gay, kicking goals, going to travel in the near future,

Oh, and im disapointing my parents.

AlphaDog94 , Dominic Sansotta Report

Final score:

12points

POST

Jessi Lovely 2 years ago

LMAOOOO SAME

3points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

#36

Everything disallowed by nap schedules, diaper genies, bed/bath routines, potty training, paying for childcare, school pickups/drop offs, homework, attitude, Driver’s Ed, endless sporting or performance practices/games/events, or the never ending/omnipresent f**king CONSTANT NOISE……….and that’s not to touch on the insane financial drain, psychotic exhaustion, resentment of spouse who I likely only married because of the kids, reminders of a so-called “biological clock”, and ruining your life and bending to the ever-present entitlement for a little person who you will definitely love but may or may not even like very much. PASS.

I’m well-rested and my Roth IRA is well-fed. ;)

BetaNatalis Report

Final score:

12points

POST

Renita Fox 2 years ago

SPOT ON !!!!

1point

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Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#37

Working from a tropical country, enjoying peace and quiet.

sharmander15 Report

Final score:

12points

POST

#38

I found out I was asexual and I'm still trying to figure stuff out but what I can tell you is that happiness comes from cats not relationships 💜

Report

Final score:

12points

Priscilla Reshell

POST

Felicity Goddard 2 years ago

Me too!

2points

#39

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses I also don’t feel the calling for marriage. I love my boyfriend and we’ve mentioned weddings/marriage, but neither of us is particularly driven to get married just to idk be married? Lol

We own a house and have three pets together so we’re pretty official already. I’ve explained it to my friends before but I don’t mind the term girlfriend or fiancée, and I love looking at engagement rings and wedding inspo boards, but I just don’t really see myself falling under the “wife” label. I kind of hate the word, probably because I tie it in with mother, as the world tends to say wife & mother, and I do not want to be anyone’s mother.

So maybe we’ll get married and he can be my husband and I can be his partner or his lady-husband, who knows what the future has in store!

bm1992 , Almos Bechtold Report

Final score:

11points

POST

Kris 2 years ago

Lady-husband<3

3points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#40

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Taking naps whenever I want haha no, seriously living life to the fullest,which includes a lot of eating out at restaurants, going on dates with all kind of different interesting exciting men, having spontaneous parties and weekend spa getaways with friends or just randomly treating myself with some shopping.

Lazy-Swing-5325 , Jay Wennington Report

Final score:

11points

POST

#41

37, single. Got a couple cats. Couple of bongs. Sleep when I want, eat when/what I want and buy myself whatever I want.

bckatie Report

Final score:

11points

POST

#42

Someone Asks Women Who Refused To Marry Or Have Kids How Life Has Been, And They Deliver 30 Honest Responses Running my own businesses, collecting English bulldogs, going on vacations whenever I feel like it, enjoying the complete silence and solitude for most of my days (except when the dogs get going, but even then I would take that over the stress (being a parent) and bulls**t (being a wife) on any given day.

sickerthan_yaaverage , Sébastien Lavalaye Report

Final score:

11points

POST

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#43

Raising lots of plant babies. Still very rewarding. Adopting and buying from the marketplace or local sellers. Still a bit on the budget, definitely finicky but they aren’t as noisy so I’m pretty satisfied. The cats don’t always enjoy new additions as they bite, scratch or swat but I think they will get used to it in time.

hollabugggggg Report

Final score:

11points

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Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

Plants? Cats don't like the plants?

0points

#44

I am married but no kids. I raise and spoil my 5 cats and raise foster kittens. I spend the rest of my time gardening.

carose89 Report

Final score:

11points

POST

MiniMaus 2 years ago

And how do you make money?

0points

Valuable_Code_9326 Report

#45

Learning new languages. learning new skills like web design, graphic design, painting, etc.

Final score:

11points

POST

#46

Learning bass guitar, learning to enjoy/ enjoying myself as a hooman, and healing generational trauma. There's much more, however, that's a start.

passionate_nymph Report

Final score:

10points

POST

Sarcastic Cow 2 years ago

That point of generation trauma - I think it´s has to do a lot with childfree people. We just want time to heal and don´t want to bring new people in that circle of suffering.

1point

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#47

Laying in bed at 9:30am. Wondering if I going to sleep more or get up now.

dirtcandy Report

Final score:

10points

POST

Felicity Goddard 2 years ago

Yes! Ha ha ha, I do this too!

2points

#48

According to my dad, living in sin, but enjoying my time child-less.

reddit Report

Final score:

9points

POST

Jessi Lovely 2 years ago

Sin is underrated 😉 😝

3points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

#49

My education, work and basically whatever i feel like doing without someone suffocating me.

dnnzu_bb Report

Final score:

8points

POST

#50

Just chilling, I got great friends and family, I got my own house, got a job I enjoy that pays well enough that I can do what i want when I want without having to think of anyone else. I’m 32 now if I meet someone and settle and have family then great but for now I’m not looking for anything and I’m happy just doing me.

ilikecocktails Report

Final score:

8points

POST

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#51

Moving to South America with my hot private chef boyfriend and traveling around the world until I don’t feel like it anymore.

bloodpressures Report

Final score:

8points

POST

Renita Fox 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

#52

I spend my time on hobbies and friends! I play in my local municipal orchestra, paint, embroider, play d&d, learn shibari and other related skills, cook/bake, read for leisure, and play animal crossing. I plan trips, which can include challenging/long hikes, wine/beer tastings, and honestly last minute activities - those things are either difficult or not possible with children on vacation.

bmeislife Report

Final score:

7points

POST

#53

I have a large, wonderful circle of friends I spend a lot of time with. I have a job I like most of the time. I used to travel a lot, before the pandemic.

felishorrendis Report

Final score:

7points

POST

#54

Partner and I both work full time and have 4 holidays planned this year with various family. We go out to eat a lot and enjoy spending time with our siblings and many nieces and nephews.

We rise at whatever time we want at the weekend and if nothing planned, take a walk in the local nature reserve, stop at the café for breakfast. It's a nice life.

Hungry-Kale600 Report

Final score:

7points

POST

See Also on Bored Panda

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#55

Working on an MA and planning to get another one. Climbing up the corporate ladder. Working on my hobbies. The usual.

lavenderpug Report

Final score:

6points

POST

#56

Saving for a house while traveling the world.

BluePearl2020 Report

Final score:

6points

POST

#57

Traveling, starting a business, building my dream house, cultivating relationships. I am getting married to a wonderful woman but both of us are older and have similar goals. The not having children thing is really what’s helped accomplish so much. Not a lot of support for parents in modern times. I’m not willing to carve pieces of myself out to have a mini-me.

thehabithopper Report

Final score:

6points

POST

#58

I’m on my 4th U.S. passport, my 6th album of original music, friends all over the continent, most parents don’t want me around their kids since I represent a life completely opposite from their parents and a conservative life. Love cats, good food, great company. There are slow times, but very little down time. No matter when I’m asked what I have been doing or what I will do, have I ever answered, “Nothing.”

Report

Final score:

6points

Octavia Hansen

POST

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“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#59

Traveling the world and learning programming.

Monica_Toro26 Report

Final score:

5points

POST

#60

Living in my cool apartment, focusing on my artistic work.

Potato4 Report

Final score:

5points

POST

#61

I'm the cool wine aunt.

Tage_ARMitch Report

Final score:

4points

POST

#62

Enjoying silence and me-time. Also Gaming.

Revi92 Report

Final score:

4points

POST

#63

Enjoying the hell out of my plants and bikes.

Plants_and_bikes Report

Final score:

4points

POST

#64

Travelling with my partner or chilling home with a bottle of wine and two cats. The absolute freedom is the best part of being child free. I can not do laundry or wash dishes for 3 days and nobody cares. Being able to just do whatever you want during your spare time is priceless. We get to be selfish and just make ourselves and each other happy. It's also less stress in general because we are two self sufficient individuals who happen to love each other so if anything happened we would be ok. We don't depend on anyone and nobody depends on us either.

Report

Final score:

4points

POST

#65

Traveling and having a good time.

kodieshmodie Report

Final score:

3points

POST

#66

Riding motorcycles, going on vacations, and accumulating neat stuff to share with my partners.

Kitchen-Ad-1161 Report

Final score:

3points

POST

#67

I rock climb and backpack, camping, play video games and hang out with friends, go to concerts and festivals....sleep. I do actually have a boyfriend but we just "cuddle" *wink and play video games together.

Izumi_Takeda Report

Final score:

3points

POST

A.J Milne 2 years ago

Not me winking back in confusion

1point

Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

Read less »

Kotryna is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Graphic Design. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a freelance graphic designer and illiustrator. When not editing, she enjoys working with clay, drawing, playing board games and drinking good tea.

Read less »

What do you think ?

POST

MiriPanda 2 years ago

I resent the implication that being single or at least childfree automatically means we're all well off financially. Many of these posts describe women who are also very privileged. Being a homeowner at 21? Nothing to do with being single and childless. Traveling the world? I work full time and have neither the money nor the time for that. Fantastic if it works out well for them, but please don't generalize. I for one have too many people around me who assume that I sleep on bags of gold and that I can do whatever I want whenever I want. Nope, not even close - and I like my life in general.

46points

Ozacoter 2 years ago

Exactly. I do not have children and I cant work so I literarly have food and a roof solely because my partner pays for it. We struggle a lot living with only one salary..

12points

Lea S. 2 years ago

I didn't see a generalization. These women were all telling their own story - not speaking for anyone else. I don't have money to travel yet but someday I might. I think if I had to provide for a child I'd cross that dream off.

4points

Louise Platiel 2 years ago

Similarly, I'm a single mom.and everyone assumes that I struggle financially. I have a good job and have learned healthy financial management skills. The assumption that I need charity bothers me.

4points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

That’s very true, but I guess they are trying to make the point that you’d have even less money with a kid involved.

3points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Yes I fully agree! Happiness is not travelling, living in a dream home, clothes up the wazoo, spa days, and fancy cars! I have none of this, I'm happy with what I've got! Things aren't happiness!

2points

Aliquid 2 years ago

You have more money than someone in the same career situation as you who DOES have kids. Kids are expensive.

1point

Adur Bdur 2 years ago

A to the m to the en. Thank you. Really thank you for proving there are people who think twice and reflect on things that are happening around them. Pleas don't forget that many thinks that are described here are only accessible to a small percentage of the world population. Many many many people with or without kids are having a very hard life. And why on earth must there be a competition? There are pros and cons on every way of life. So what I have kids and yes there are many things I had to give up, but you never will understand the feeling when your kid runs into you to hug you or tells you that he/she loves you. At the end of the day everyone can make their own decisions. If decided you have kids and you regret it, it's your fault not the kids.

0points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

They also have more education, and maybe better money management skills, investment advice that's not privileged that's being smart

-1point

Oopsydaisy 2 years ago

Men always make out as if it's women who want to get married and do the whole settling down thing, but the reality is that is actually men who want to do it. Witness the uprise in men who demand that women be made available to them and who say that women have 'too many rights'. The whole system of coupledom works a lot better for men than it does women, and always has.

21points

Lea S. 2 years ago (edited)

Or it's both? Depends on the person. I know men who have no interest in marriage and kids. I know women who have no interest. I know men who want kids, and I know women who wants kids. There's no rule. I know a woman who adopted well into her forties and is now a single mom. Everyone's different.

2points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

Agreed, pressure from men to provide them with kids is a lot. And many times relationships don’t work out or the men don’t treat their partner right.

2points

Frannie Kaplan 2 years ago

Yes I realised that already when I was 20

0points

BigFish Artwire 2 years ago

Most of these have to do with having money, which of course you have less when you have kids. But the benefits that they list are all about money, and since I'm broke, I think I'll have kids then haha. Just kidding :)

19points

Val 2 years ago

Single childfree people in my country pay waaaayyyy more taxes than couples with or without kids. This is really frustrating and actually quite discriminating.

17points

Loty 2 years ago

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lenka 2 years ago

Being childfree is an amazing choice (or otherwise) to make and presents opportunities - but so many of these comments assume you have to choose between a life you want and children. For women that has traditionally been the case – but it doesn’t have to be. I was late to marriage and kids and didn’t really want kids (until I did) so I did most of these things before I had kids. Got my degree. Travelled the world alone. But the thing is… all these things are still possible with kids. You don't have to sacrifice yourself and all your dreams for your children. I still take impromptu weekends away on my own or with my girlfriends, I can still go to the bar and dance 'til 3am, I learnt a new language, I have hobbies, I work a fulfilling career and I am not defined by my role as mother. All of this is possible because my partner is an actual EQUAL carer of the children. We work together as a team and together we make sure that we each have what we need to be who we are.

13points

lenka 2 years ago

My point is… if you don’t want kids – great!! But if you do, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to sacrifice yourself.

13points

Ozacoter 2 years ago

Sadly the reality for most women is that if they get a male partner or kids they will be saddled with a ton of donestic chores that will limit their career, studies and social life. It is wonderful that you did not had that but it is not the norm. Many studies showed that still even in houses where women work full time they do more or the majority of housechores and child rearing. Recently there was a study in spain where about 60% of men asked (between 20 and 35 not old men) believed that women are "better suited" for those tasks.

11points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

That’s true but the odds diminish drastically of accomplishing those things if you have kids.

5points

Oopsydaisy 2 years ago

Sorry Ienka, but you didn't consciously create that reality. You got lucky. And you have money. Please don't be so smug.

3points

Karin Jansen 2 years ago

Thank you so much for saying this!! I got the same feeling from all of these posts, so filled with the assumption that you can't pursue your dreams or hobbies with a kid. Of course you can!

1point

Queerios 2 years ago (edited)

I liked seeing the point of view of all the women in this article; even though I'm way too young to have kids now, this is making me very comfortable in my not wanting kids haha. However, I'm pretty disappointed with the amount of people commenting and saying that these people are selfish, or asking why they couldn't do things like travel/have pets with kids. Like, it's these women's choice and they're living fulfilling lives. The article isn't about what you can do ONLY if you don't have kids, it's people telling why they personally didn't and what they enjoy about it. Please just respect their decisions and if you don't like it, kindly frick off and go read a different article

9points

Carrie de Luka 2 years ago

Hear hear. Comes across a tad desperate to justify their choices to be honest. People having children is a purely selfish act - they have children because THEY want them. No other reason. Fine, great. Just let people alone and stop acting as if those without are going to be alone 'at the end' and 'you'll end up in a care home'. Loads of people WITH children end up in care homes. Awful argument with such a self-centred core.

8points

Tracy Aubrey 2 years ago

Stopped reading around 30th post, it seems all these people have a lot of money and good jobs, so maybe that's why they're living their best life.. I knew very early on that I won't have kids due to a medical condition. I have had a great life so far, have a niece and nephew that I dote on and now since I've recently gotten married, I have a wonderful stepson who spends half of his time with us and half with his mom. Having been childless all this time, I can honestly say that I've gotten used to having my life/time etc. to my self and I really don't know if I'll be able to handle having a child, but every now and then, I feel that I would give anything to hold That little precious bundle in my arms. I do feel that I've missed out on the joy of being a parent.

9points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

Till that precious bundle poops on ya.... :)

1point

A Jones 2 years ago

I don't have a desire to sprout my own family. Also the other reason I don't have a desire to make my own belly spawn is that I'm asexual. I'm in a good career (although not very high paying), I enjoy going out, playing VG, reading (daily), traveling, and coming home to calm and quietness after a long day. I always disliked being asked about 'when are you gonna find someone?' or 'are you going to have kids' by folks, it's just pushy and rude. I don't have a mate, but don't want to rush with getting into a relationship just yet.

8points

BORKADYMUSIC 2 years ago

Hello from a fellow ace! And I completely agree, my family is always saying things like “WHEN you have a boyfriend…” and “WHEN you get married and have kids…” nah, I’m gonna be a musician and live with my best friend in Canada, suck it society!!!

2points

Susie Elle 2 years ago (edited)

Lots of love for these women and people in general who choose for what they want in life and aspire to be. My personal view on the matter is that there can exist a parallel between these types of lifestyle and the one that includes a partner (potential kids will make things more difficult, that's true). A good, healthy relationship will nurture your preferred lifestyle(s), wishes and dreams. I try to actively encourage my boyfriend to do what he wants and loves in life, even if that for example means moving away for a period of time. He does the same for me. If we belong together, we'll make it work. If we can't make it work, then life has different journeys planned for each of us. Life doesn't demand you choose between getting married or living your preferred life - the wrong type of people do.

5points

Susie Elle 2 years ago

I'd like to add that a relationship is never a must in life, of course!

4points

Hseed 2 years ago

My wife and I always say it would be great to have the possibility of two lives: one with kids and one without. I'm a proud father of two kids that I love more than my own life, but my wife and I wanted kids from the beginning. We had them pretty late cause we were having so much fun by ourselves. That's why I understand and respect both decisions made by people.

5points

Hseed 2 years ago

It's kind of sad when people rely their happiness and meaning of life in the fact of having children.

15points

Display Name 2 years ago

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Ozacoter 2 years ago

Same for men but most people ignore it. The older the man the less quality of sperm, more risk of mutations and illneses for the child and more risk for the mother at birth. But we love blaming women.

10points

Loty 2 years ago

All the posts here can be summarized with 1 line: Kids are expensive and since I don't have that expense I'm free to spend my money on...

4points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

I see a lot of that too. But not everyone falls into that category. I can afford kids. I can afford a brood of my own, plus all of yours and all of your grandkids and still have whatever I want. But I won’t have kids because I hate them. They’re cringy and boring, loud for no reason, they’re uncomfortable to look at, their voices are shrill and grating, their mouths are dirty, they want everything, they know nothing, they can’t even function to wipe their own butts, they are repetitive and naggy, unappreciative most of the time, they can’t do anything cool or talk about anything interesting, they’re style crampers who take up too much time that could be spent doing something better. Doesn’t matter what I spend my money on, that’s irrelevant. It won’t be kids tho.

7points

Random Anon 2 years ago

It's good to see people making conscious decisions over kids. Having kids do mean the end of you as the center of your life, at least for 18 years or so. If you're willing, sure go for it. If not, no bid deal. Far too many people just have kids because it's the "right" time or because their peers are doing it only, to resent that decision later on.

3points

Janet L 3 weeks ago

The thing with kids is it’s not just 18 years - once you have kids you worry about them for the rest of your life

0points

Kirsten Kerkhof 2 years ago (edited)

I'm a semi-professional dancer and also work 4 days a week as tenured college professor. I don't even have time for pets (though I do miss my cats who died of old age), so yeah, no kids for me. Plus, I don't have to work full-time to afford my life, and can pusue my dancing & travel to venues and competitions when I want.

2points

Kanuli 2 years ago

That was my plan. Then I found my dream wife, I never knew I was seeking/missing/wanting. And suddenly we are 16 years on cloud nine and still loving, joking, laughing, as we were back then. Can’t imagine a life without her.

2points

Michelle Kenyon 2 years ago

To the comment on #12 who questions how she could afford to buy a house at 21. First of all she never said started working at 25, just that she'd been working full time in her chosen career for 13 years. She could have been working part time in it before then while finishing her degree. Also she could have had help from family or an inheritance. Or heck, some women work as call girls or model and are so successful they have a lot of spare money.

1point

Lea S. 2 years ago

I run my own childcare business to get my baby fix. I sing in an adult choir and go to the gym three times a week. I go for long hikes through a pretty valley in my neighborhood whenever I want. Sometimes in the winter I bundle up and go on my own little blizzard bar crawl. I spend long weekend afternoons in the library. Or I go to my favorite little wine bar and spend hours just wondering around that neighborhood and splitting my time between the wine, the craft beer place, the coffee shop, and the used bookstore. I can stay as long as I want; and I don't need to check in with anyone. Sometimes I don't check my phone for a whole day or two. If I want to go spend the weekend away....I can. If I want to spend the holiday with my family - no one argues. If I want to go to a local baseball game and stay for the WHOLE thing...I get to. I am finally getting into rpgs - a lifelong dream of mine. I can spend all day practicing my piano, and all night singing karaoke. It's a wonderful life.

1point

John Augsburger 2 years ago

Why aren't I seeing this question of childless men, Is it alright for men not to reproduce, but women have to justify their lack of ankle biters?

1point

M_ray-ray 2 years ago

I'm glad that so many people are single, childfree, and happy, but I find it odd when reading some of the comments. I also have 2 degrees, I also sign up and take courses that are of interest to me, I also change jobs when I feel that I need that, I also own a home, I also read, and I also have 2 kids. Why should we make having or not having kids be the reason for being happy or successful? In the modern world kids are not this burden that will definitely ruin your life - I agree having or not being able to have kids can be something very traumatizing for some people in some situations, but this goes both ways.

0points

Janet C 2 years ago

Retired at 62 and moved to a small mountain village an hour south of Valencia, Spain. What am I doing? I'm living my dream -- every day. I have a home in paradise and plenty of money to travel all over Europe.

0points

Frannie Kaplan 2 years ago

What about the actual children? It's cute to celebrate Christmas with them qnd take pictures but most parents will love the childhood phase, when their kids were cute and obedient. How many parents have the same relationship with their kids after the age of 16? Not many.

0points

Betty Reese 2 years ago

I have a longterm partner who I have been with for 12 years. We have been able to travel extensively all over the world, buy a home on two acres in a rural area so I could quit my corporate job and pursue my dear of rescuing animals, growing food, and starting my own small business. We now have 5 dogs, 3 cats, 8 ducks, 4 tortoises, 5 turtles, 2 dragons and I was recently able to remove the last of our chickens. It hadn't always been sunshine and roses but I wouldn't give it up for anything in the world

0points

FlamingoPanda 2 years ago

Unless you come from a rich family or somehow land a high paying job most of what is described here will be out your reach. Single, childfree and happy little panda here although I do help my sister care for my ageing mother (that has helped me realise I have no patience for other people, let alone needy kids). For me I get to go where I want (assuming I can afford it at the time) when I want without needing to ask another person if they want to come along. I go swimming in the summer after work (flexi time is great) or snuggle up on the couch with a good series. I don't own a house (cannot afford to buy one) but I have a nice little rental place just for me. I go on holiday once a year to a local place. It is a good life and I love it.

0points

Maja Ossowska-Nowakowska 2 years ago

I love that these women are free to live their lives as they see fit! I wish we all knew that we can do so! What scares me here is the majority of responses revolving around "I have a successful career", or "I have a job I love", or "I make good money!". Having kids or marriage doesn't mean you're stuck in a worthless, shitty job with no prospects, c'mon...

0points

Phoebe Willis 2 years ago

Can I just say this article was off to a great start before they put not one, but TWO single cat lady stories in the top 10? Pets are great but, wow, way to stereotype guys. My husband and I are childless by choice, we both work in hospitality on remote island resorts. Because this is our life for so long and our island family is our real family, having a child isn't really an option without having to find a new job and home and legit family. And even if we did all that, our careers basically only allow us to work nights, meaning extra fees for child care if and when available. We aren't working on double degrees, or travelling the world. We are just working our arses off, hanging on by the skin of our teeth, and God forbid having some fun in between people hassling us why no kids and why aren't you rich you have no kids lol

0points

Rens 2 years ago

I'm really happy with my life, this year I will be 50, my daughter will be 21 and she's fully independent (studying and volunteers for The Samaritans). I'm in a relationship but live in my own place. I'm disabled and have chronic illnesses so my health isn't what it used to be but I am finally financially independent. Life would certainly be easier with more money; I'd love to be able to help my friends and family. I have time with my partner and time alone, I live by my own rules and no-one dictates what I do. I'm the main provider when it comes to running our 2 households, but I'm with a good, kind, respectful man who appreciates everything I do for the both of us. We've both been married before (him twice despite him never wanting to get married) but at our stage in life, we're content with our arrangement.

0points

Cynthia Bonville 2 years ago

So what pisses me off is over and over it's freedom and career vs. children. Or just a career or children, never both. I can attest I have two degrees and was working on my 3rd when I realized I wanted to have kids and I couldn't put it off - not because it is impossible to get a PhD and have children but because in my country there is no way to do both period. In the doctoral fellowship program I was in you were expected to do 70-80 hours on site work for 5-7 years, no maternity leave or policy for that nor childcare, when one is the most fertile part of one's life, after that one has to in addition do a post-doc which is only slightly better in pay for another ~7 years. I would have been 40 when I was done, and then working on establishing my name at that point. So I am a wealthy (not $) with children and I can't believe how much I love them and keep falling in love with them but my "nimble mind" (not my words) is doing kids and not working for our world other then those kids.

0points

K Witmer 2 years ago

I didn't have my daughter until I was 30. All through my 20s I had a blast. It was the best time in my life. Nothing beats independence. I've been w my husband for almost 24 yrs so we've built a nice life. I will be honest though it did take me a good ten years of being a mother before I found myself again and now that I've turned 50 and going through menopause I'm on another journey. This one seems to be difficult in different ways then it was when I became a mom.

0points

Natalie Kudryashova 2 years ago

Another post implying that if you have kids as a woman, then say goodbye to other nice things in life. You know what, you can have multiple degrees, jobs, money, house, margaritas, hobbies and cats irrespective of whether you have a spouse and/or children. It’s not a binary choice, can we stop presenting it as such.

-2points

Dilly Millandry 2 years ago

There are a lot of 'fun with kids' articles on Bored Panda. These people are just saying how much more freedom and money THEY have. It isn't telling anyone what to do. However, for some who might be dithering because of societal pressures and not their own desires it may just give them the added impetus to stick with what they want. No-one needs to hear a load of parents justifying their decisions when getting married and having children has been considered the accepted norm for centuries, or did you not notice that those without children were frequently pitied or made to defend THEIR choices ad nauseum. May not be a binary choice but there is definitely a sliding scale.

2points

Patti Vance 2 years ago

as a woman who never expected to have a kid, i thought i would have the same feelings that these women shared. and, yes, a bit a envy came into play while reading this. but, what having a kid unexpectedly did for me was to make me more focused. i returned to college. got a good career. and, i learned so much about myself through having a child. in fact, to the point i wish i was a little more free in how i raised him. but, all is good. we have a great relationship with my 42 burly bearded hardass of a son being a self proclaimed mama's boy. fortunately his wife understands our relationship and does not resent it. as for me...if they ever split up i would be hard pressed not to keep her first just because it is so nice to have a daughter after a lifetime of sons and grandsons

-2points

Faith Hurst-Bilinski 2 years ago

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Gianna 2 years ago

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Lisa-Marie Dhondt 2 years ago

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Curry on... 2 years ago

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Carrie Laughs 2 years ago

Most do have a family. Just not with their own children. Such narrow definitions people live by...

6points

Ueda 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

Don't worry, single and child-free people hear the same tiring comments from parents about how "kids are such a blessing" and "you're missing out on love" and gag ad naseum. We get it and we don't care. Jeez...if you want to make accusations about overcompensating, every time someone tries to call me "selfish" for not having kids and trying to pressure me all I can think is that they want me to become a parent like them because misery loves company.

16points

AzKhaleesi 2 years ago

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Dilly Millandry 2 years ago

They aren't. If that is what you hear, that's due to your own skews and views on life. No-one actually needs to hear a load of parents justifying their decisions when getting married and having children has been considered the accepted norm for centuries. Those without children are frequently pitied or made to defend their choices, usually by parents. Some often sounding desperate to make it sound like 'of course we can all do those things' and yet somehow most don't. Funny how so many go on about how exhausted they are, talk about how tough raising children is. May not be a binary choice but there is definitely a sliding scale of what people have time and money for and people just want to keep glossing over that.

3points

Robin McCarthy 2 years ago

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Carrie Laughs 2 years ago

Because that was what the article was about. Sure you could find lonely women. You can find practically any type of person or situation to fill a category if you want. Including people who regret having children, though too many people like to pretend that one doesn't exist.

6points

jk nbt 2 years ago (edited)

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Display Name 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

This comment is kind of one-sided too, assuming that just because you marry and procreate that you will be taken care of. That's not always the case.

12points

Display Name 2 years ago

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madbakes 2 years ago

It sound like you place a lot of responsibility on spouse/children to do those things. Just bc someone doesnt have children doesn't mean they have no one.

5points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

Not everyone is looking for validation from others

2points

XenoMurph 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

Do YOU do social work? Because if not then you can shut the hell up. Women aren't obligated to spend their lives trying to help others.

13points

M 2 years ago

Oh get off your damn high horse. The point is women are finally learning that they are allowed to live for themselves and choose to be happy instead of having to sacrifice themselves for others. A great life is a life lived with joy and fulfillment. Go volunteer your own damn self if that's what you think is "worthy".

12points

madbakes 2 years ago

Several mentioned pets. You don't find that worthy?? Maybe they're not lives well-lived to you, but you don't have to live them. There are a whole lot of people with children who don't do things you would deem as worthy. No one has to live to your standards except you.

1point

Damon 2 years ago

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Gelato Cat 2 years ago

Haha funny, except for the fact you did, indeed, comment

7points

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MiriPanda 2 years ago

46points

Ozacoter 2 years ago

Exactly. I do not have children and I cant work so I literarly have food and a roof solely because my partner pays for it. We struggle a lot living with only one salary..

12points

Lea S. 2 years ago

4points

Louise Platiel 2 years ago

Similarly, I'm a single mom.and everyone assumes that I struggle financially. I have a good job and have learned healthy financial management skills. The assumption that I need charity bothers me.

4points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

That’s very true, but I guess they are trying to make the point that you’d have even less money with a kid involved.

3points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Yes I fully agree! Happiness is not travelling, living in a dream home, clothes up the wazoo, spa days, and fancy cars! I have none of this, I'm happy with what I've got! Things aren't happiness!

2points

Aliquid 2 years ago

You have more money than someone in the same career situation as you who DOES have kids. Kids are expensive.

1point

Adur Bdur 2 years ago

0points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

They also have more education, and maybe better money management skills, investment advice that's not privileged that's being smart

-1point

Oopsydaisy 2 years ago

21points

Lea S. 2 years ago (edited)

2points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

Agreed, pressure from men to provide them with kids is a lot. And many times relationships don’t work out or the men don’t treat their partner right.

2points

Frannie Kaplan 2 years ago

Yes I realised that already when I was 20

0points

BigFish Artwire 2 years ago

19points

Val 2 years ago

Single childfree people in my country pay waaaayyyy more taxes than couples with or without kids. This is really frustrating and actually quite discriminating.

17points

Loty 2 years ago

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lenka 2 years ago

13points

lenka 2 years ago

My point is… if you don’t want kids – great!! But if you do, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to sacrifice yourself.

13points

Ozacoter 2 years ago

11points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

That’s true but the odds diminish drastically of accomplishing those things if you have kids.

5points

Oopsydaisy 2 years ago

Sorry Ienka, but you didn't consciously create that reality. You got lucky. And you have money. Please don't be so smug.

3points

Karin Jansen 2 years ago

Thank you so much for saying this!! I got the same feeling from all of these posts, so filled with the assumption that you can't pursue your dreams or hobbies with a kid. Of course you can!

1point

Queerios 2 years ago (edited)

9points

Carrie de Luka 2 years ago

8points

Tracy Aubrey 2 years ago

9points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

Till that precious bundle poops on ya.... :)

1point

A Jones 2 years ago

8points

BORKADYMUSIC 2 years ago

2points

Susie Elle 2 years ago (edited)

5points

Susie Elle 2 years ago

I'd like to add that a relationship is never a must in life, of course!

4points

Hseed 2 years ago

5points

Hseed 2 years ago

It's kind of sad when people rely their happiness and meaning of life in the fact of having children.

15points

Display Name 2 years ago

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Ozacoter 2 years ago

10points

Loty 2 years ago

All the posts here can be summarized with 1 line: Kids are expensive and since I don't have that expense I'm free to spend my money on...

4points

Mewton’s Third Paw 2 years ago

7points

Random Anon 2 years ago

3points

Janet L 3 weeks ago

The thing with kids is it’s not just 18 years - once you have kids you worry about them for the rest of your life

0points

Kirsten Kerkhof 2 years ago (edited)

2points

Kanuli 2 years ago

2points

Michelle Kenyon 2 years ago

1point

Lea S. 2 years ago

1point

John Augsburger 2 years ago

Why aren't I seeing this question of childless men, Is it alright for men not to reproduce, but women have to justify their lack of ankle biters?

1point

M_ray-ray 2 years ago

0points

Janet C 2 years ago

0points

Frannie Kaplan 2 years ago

0points

Betty Reese 2 years ago

0points

FlamingoPanda 2 years ago

0points

Maja Ossowska-Nowakowska 2 years ago

0points

Phoebe Willis 2 years ago

0points

Rens 2 years ago

0points

Cynthia Bonville 2 years ago

0points

K Witmer 2 years ago

0points

Natalie Kudryashova 2 years ago

-2points

Dilly Millandry 2 years ago

2points

Patti Vance 2 years ago

-2points

Faith Hurst-Bilinski 2 years ago

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Gianna 2 years ago

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Lisa-Marie Dhondt 2 years ago

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Curry on... 2 years ago

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Carrie Laughs 2 years ago

Most do have a family. Just not with their own children. Such narrow definitions people live by...

6points

Ueda 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

16points

AzKhaleesi 2 years ago

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Dilly Millandry 2 years ago

3points

Robin McCarthy 2 years ago

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Carrie Laughs 2 years ago

6points

jk nbt 2 years ago (edited)

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Display Name 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

This comment is kind of one-sided too, assuming that just because you marry and procreate that you will be taken care of. That's not always the case.

12points

Display Name 2 years ago

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madbakes 2 years ago

It sound like you place a lot of responsibility on spouse/children to do those things. Just bc someone doesnt have children doesn't mean they have no one.

5points

Justine Queequag 2 years ago

Not everyone is looking for validation from others

2points

XenoMurph 2 years ago

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Potato 2 years ago

Do YOU do social work? Because if not then you can shut the hell up. Women aren't obligated to spend their lives trying to help others.

13points

M 2 years ago

12points

madbakes 2 years ago

1point

Damon 2 years ago

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Gelato Cat 2 years ago

Haha funny, except for the fact you did, indeed, comment

7points